"Hit Man" was paid to kill me

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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 3:49 pm

^^^^^^ hahahahahahaha.....a duel? I love it!! Do it like the movie "West Side Story" and tie thier wrists together. Give them switchblades and the last man standing wins.

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 3:50 pm

^^ Sounds like Bushido Blade Laughing

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 3:51 pm

^^^^^^

Someone has to try it. The carrot to dangle is huge, and he'll receive it wether he does or doesnt show up. I've edited the idea a bit. If it doesn't work out for this mugu, I'll find some other fool to play this on.

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 3:54 pm

I'd be more impressed if he can beat the San Andreas flight school. Rolling Eyes

If he could do that, I'd be more than happy to put him in my will as a bonus. Laughing

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 4:21 pm

I think a duel or rock paper scissors is the way to go.

This guy dropped me when I said I could only pay in sex (used female character even!).... so now I am going to go back at him and offer him $50.00 a month payments to not kill me. I mean really if we would all just pay him $50.00 a month then he would have a decent income and not have to work any more.

These killer types are just lazy.

Moderator Joined: 10 Jan 2007 Posts: 14513

Well, I just had to do it, I rarely slap lads, but he needs it. Here is my reply

Quote:

Dear Sir

Or should I say Ma'am. I bet you are some little punk who hangs on in an Internet cafe in Lagos ands sucks amu in the bathroom when you are not sending scam letters. You probably dress up as a girl and date men. You probably caught HIV from a goat or something like that.

Why don't you or your representative meet me for a duel. You think your a bad ass, I'd like to find out. Alternately I can arrange to meet you or your represenative in cage fight --- 5 - 5 minute rounds under unified MMA rules.

Don't sing it, bring it ---- your all bluff, no stuff. Your just a small boy oooooooo.

Well, time to rebait him from another account Laughing

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 5:46 pm

@dev:

This is why I am glad you are my mentor Very Happy

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 6:10 pm

the idiot ıs trying to screw some money out of SCROOGE MC DUCK and I am playıng the bodyguard Machs von Hınten (I f**k you from behind) and told him that its not possible to kill a Scrooge Mc Duck as Duckburg is a very safe place and also Donald Duck and Gander might come in to help Scrooge. He still does not believe it:

Quote:

An: "cros cross4" <[email protected]>
In-Reply-To: <[email protected]>
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=iso-8859-1
Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit
Content-Length: 1371

foolısh ASSCLOWN come and try your luck

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

--- cros cross4 <[email protected]> schrieb:

> YOU THINK SO?WELL.........I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY TO
> YOU SINCE YOU WILL NOT DO AS I SAID,AND I WILL STOP
> EMAILING YOU SINCE YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT,BETTER
> CONVEY MY MESSAGE TO HIM,IF YOU DARE ME,I SWEAR YOU
> WILL NOT FIND ME FUNNY.
>
> Machs Vonhinten <machsvanhinten@yahoo> wrote:
> what ELSE...?
>
>
> YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT ITS NOT POSS�BLE TO KILL
> SCROOGE
> MC DUCK !!
>
> if you still insist just come and try
>
> you may have to deal w�th GANDER and DONALD too!
>
> DUCKSBURG �s a very SAFE town
>
> so be warned!
>
> so calm down and let us do some cool bus�ines!
>
>
> Machs von Hinten

> --- cros cross4 schrieb:
>
> > BULLSHIT,
> > I WILL NOT DO ANY HAND-TO-HAND TRANSACTION IS MY
> > MONEY MUST BE IN MY ACCOUNT FIRST THEN I WILL GIVE
> > THE TAPE AS PROMISED,HE HAS THE MONEY BETTER TELL
> > HIM TO PAY UP ELSE.......

> >
> > Machs Vonhinten wrote:

> > OK
> >
> > You are invited to come to our house if you dare.
> >
> > Bring the tape with you and we will reward you
> >
> > Machs von Hinten
> >
> >
> > --- cros cross4 schrieb:
> >
> > > AM JUST A PROFESSIONAL,SOMEONE HIRED ME TO KILL
> > > HIM,HE EVEN SAID THAT HE HAD HIRED SOMEONE FOR
> THE
> > > JOB BEFORE BUT THE PERSON FAILED HIM,THAT WAS
> WHY
> > HE
> > > EMPLOYED ME,I HAVE MADE NECESSARY INQUIRIES
> ABOUT
> > > HIM AND I FOUND OUT HE IS A VERY GOOD AND
> WEALTHY
> > > MAN,
> > > I DO NOT HAVE MUCH TIME FOR STORIES RIGHT
> NOW,ONCE
> > > I RECIEVE MY MONEY I WILL DELIVER THE TAPE AND
> > DEAL
> > > CLOSED,REMEMBER MY MONEY FIRST B/4 THE TAPE

> > >
> > > Machs Vonhinten wrote:

> > > Hi!
> > >
> > > You have to deal with me if you want some
> > > ramson-money
> > > from Mr. Srooge Mc Duck!
> > >
> > > Now tell me what is your problem?
> > >
> > > Machs von Hinten
> > >
> > >
> > >

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 6:56 pm

all the baits must be working at keeping him busy, just got this

I mailed him

Quote:

I am not familar with west union, what is that? I do however do all my money tranacsions through bank- to - bank transfer on my electronic backing account. Is there a way to do that in this case. I sure hope as I really want to live as my kids will not beable to live without me here.

He Replied:

Quote:

I WILL SEND YOU AN ACCOUNT TO MAKE THE TRANSFER TO LATE TODAY OR TOMMOROW MORNING,AM BUSY NOW.

I bet he is Laughing

Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 7:09 pm

Okay, I have never tried this before, but with so many baiting him, I am re-baiting from the same e-mail. Twisted Evil

Moderator Joined: 10 Jan 2007 Posts: 14513

@the man -- not to worry, this clown is to lazy to check. Also, I doubt he will meet me at high noon, probably won't even respond. Laughing

@just me --- if he gives you banking info, be sure to send it to Alan or post it here. Maybe the poor lad has another account (at least for the time being Twisted Evil

)

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 2:50 am

After telling him I wanted to pay him to have sex with the wife of the guy who I believed ordered the hit on me and videotape it, he didn't really bite, just demanded I send him the $10,000 to save my life. So I told him I didn't believe he was a real hit man and dared him to come and kill me. He ignored me, so I sent him a scared email saying I'll do whatever he wants as long as he promises not to set my house on fire again!

He got annoyed because HE'S ALREADY GIVEN ME THE INFORMATION about how to pay him and demanded I do it instantly.

So I forwarded him an email I got from someone claiming to be his lawyer (another account I've set up of course), telling me that my hit man has been arrested for murder and is now in jail awaiting trial, he felt it was his duty to let me know I'm safe from being killed now, and he will have sex with the guy's wife for $50,000.

Told the hit man that I'll get his lawyer to do it, and wished him all the best with his trial. Twisted Evil

No response yet!

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 11:06 am

Well since it has been a while since someone has tried to kill me (Iraq in 2003), I figured I would join in on the fun by sending our little mugu assassin an email begging for my life:

Quote:

I do not have $10,000, but I do have cell phones and laptop computers I can have shipped to you. Please let me know if this is suitable.

Da Mayor

Well he replied with this:

Quote:

DON"T GET ON MY NERVES,ALL I NEED IS CASH,IF YOU HAVE VALUEBLE PROPERTIES AS YOU CLAIM,SELL THEM OFF THEN AND SEND ME THE CASH,YOU HAVE THREE DAYS TO DO THAT

So being the meanie that I am, I borrowed an ASEM modality of where I Moneygram some cash to a bank in T@k0r@di, Gh@n@ for an orphanage to see if he will go to get it. Of course since I did not know who to send it too, you know I gave him the Question and answer. Hopfully he will go (it is over 600 miles from where he is located) Cool

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 6:07 pm

Quote:

I NEVER KNOW YOU ARE SUCH A DUMB FOOL,DO PEOPLE WRITE EMAILS FROM JAIL,LISTEN MAN,THIS IS THE SECOND TIME YOU ARE FUCKING WITH ME,I THINK IS HIGH TIME I DEAL WITH YOU AS YOU SOLELY DESERVE,IF BY THE END OF 24HOUR FROM NOW AND I STILL DID NOT SEE THE SLIPS OF THE PAYMENTS,I MAY NOT BE NEEDING IT AGAIN AND YOU WILL LEAVE ME WITH NO OTHER OPTION................

THAT YOU ARE STILL ALIVE TO DAY,I AM INSTRUMENTAL TO IT AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU ANY MOMENT FROM NOW I WILL STILL BE INSTRUMENTAL TO,YOUR INFORMATINS WILL BE FORWARDED TO MY BOYS TO CARRY OUT THE JOB BY THE END OF 24HRS,THE CHOICE IS YOURS..

24HRS.

Damn. hasn't had any emails from him either! This guy sure does get pissed off easily...

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 6:20 pm

I hope some of you are sending him on Western Union/Moneygram trips to waste his time. Laughing

That way, he's going to have doubts when he gets real payments from Western Union.

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 9:56 pm

Well I just sent him �12,000.00. Lets see if he gets it, cuz I also sent his bank details to Alan!

Since my character is female I keep offering to have sex with him. He never responds to that..... I wonder if he is gay..... I am sure that I will have to ask that in my next e-mail to him Shocked

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 11:41 pm

I've gotten the same sorts of things most everybody else has, but this made me laugh:

Quote:

YOUR MANNER OF APPROACH GETS ON MY NERVES,HOW CAN YOU BE TALKING OF ANOTHER DEAL WHEN YOU HAVE NOT SAVED YOURSELF,IF YOU WANT ME TO KILL MY EMPLOYER FINE ITS MY JOB I WILL DO IT BUT THAT IS A NEW DEAL ALTOGETHER WHICH WE WILL TALK ABOUT LATER.THE MONEY AM DEMANDING FROM YOU RIGHT NOW YOU CAN CALL "SHOW OF GRATITUDE" IT IS A MANDATARY PAYMENT YOU MUST HAVE TO MAKE.

IF YOU KNOW WHAT IS GOOD FOR YOU GO NOW AND PAY THE MONY I DEMANDED TO THE RECIPIENTS I GAVE TO YOU AND GET BACK TO ME WITH THE PAYMENT SLIPS FOR CONFIRMATION.

IF YOU MESS WITH ME ONE FUCKING MORE TIME,I SWEAR YOU WILL NOT LIVE TO REGRATE IT.

I've been insisting he promise not to tell my wife that his men have been watching me and may have seen me with my lover Rosie Palm. I'm also asking him to kill Bill. Finally, I sent him this today after he gave me his word that he wouldn't tell my wife about my Rosie Palm:

Quote:

That's good enough for me. Thank you. I've attached the scanned receipts to this message. (A renamed .dll this time.)

Now that you have that, I need your fee structure. I would like you to kill Bill. How much will you charge for this?

By the way, are you a member of the Assassin's Guild? Bill is, I know that for a fact. Does this cause you any problem?

Next up: a few trips to Moneygram. Wheee!

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 2:42 am

I replied to this guy. I'm a businessman (thanx to mentor Cherrie) who just can't believe somebody hates me. I asked him to be sure he has the right person:

Quote:

YOU OBVIOUSLY THINK I HAVE TIME FOR STUPID INTERNET WRITE UPS,AM I BUSY MAN IN MY FIELD JUST LIKE YOU,IF YOU HAVE SEEN ANYBODY FOLLOWING YOU DOES THAT MAKE ME A REAL PROFESSIONAL WHO HAS BEEN IN BHIS BUISNESS FOR OVER 17YRS.
IN THIS OUR PLANET EARTH EVEN THE ANIMALS WITHOUT SENSE HAVE ENEMIES TALK LESS OF A WEALTHY PERSON LIKE YOU.
AS FOR REPORTING TO THE POLICE,HEY,YOU DARE NOT CUZ IF YOU DO YOU WILL BE COMMITING YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY.
YOU ARE BEGGINING TO GET ON MY NERVES AND YOU THINK I HAVE ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD TO WRITE YOU MAILS,I HATE BEING QUESTIONED,IF YOU CONTINUE LIKE THIS YOU WILL LIVE ME WITH NO OTHER OPTION..........................

A STITCH IN TIME SAVES NINE .

Then "Paul W. xxxxxxx" <[email protected]> wrote:

Quote:

Listen, my good man, don't do anything rash right now. I give you my
word I will not go to New Scotland Yard. I have a proposition that may
interest you. I know it is my ex-wife who hired you to kill me; don't
ask me how I know. I just know. That is the type of person she is,
pure evil. But I thought she would never do anything to hurt me because
I send her the equivalent of $3500 USD per month as court-ordered
support. But your clue to me, "A stitch in time saves nine," pointed
the finger straight at her due to her former occupation, as you know.

My proposition is this: You shall double-cross her. Rather than
killing me, you kill HER instead and I will share the life insurance
payment with you. THIS WILL WORK! I SAW THIS ONE TIME IN A MOVIE, AND
IT WORKED PERFECTLY! Well, actually in the movie the killer
double-crossed both people...killed them both and got all the money.
But you won't do that because we will have a signed agreement between
us. Please, forget about harming me! I believe she was lying to you!
She doesn't have enough money to pay you...all she has is what I send
her every month, plus the house she lives in and her motorcar. I HAVE
ALL THE MONEY, AND THERE IS A TWO MILLION USD LIFE INSURANCE POLICY ON
HER THAT SHE FORGOT ABOUT WHEN WE DIVORCED! DON'T KILL ME! I AM
WORRIED SICK ABOUT THIS! PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!

Please think about my proposition and e-mail me directly.

Your partner,

Paul

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 11:09 am

Well I sent him the bank transfer receipt.... so we will see what happens. I think Monday he will get an e-mail showing that the transfer failed due to the account being closed. For some reason he does not mind when I keep changing modalities. From the same e-mail addy I have been:

1. Poor mother of 2 who can only pay $50 per month;
2. Porn star offering orgy with him and his men as payment;
3. Hooker that has $5,000.00
4. Woman from france with �12,000 sitting around.

I just answer from which ever character strikes my fancy.

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 2:21 pm

I'm in too!
I am going to negotiate with him that he will kill my lad instead of me.. I'm ready to double the amount! Laughing

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 3:45 pm

Quote:

A little bird has whispered into my shell like, that you
have more fingers in pies than a leper on a bleeding cookery course.

I've just picked myself up off the floor after laughing so much at this. Great turn of phrase, have you thought of becoming a writer?

Moderator Joined: 10 Jan 2007 Posts: 14513

Mugu has still not responded to my challenge -- oh well, I'm sure he's keeping busy answering baiters all day long Laughing

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 5:24 pm

We've now been through 3 bank acounts, all sent to Allan, keep telling him that the accounts don't work. Since I know nothing about this "west onion" think he's talking about he sent me this mail

Quote:

IT IS OBVIOUS YOU ARE PLAYING WITH YOUR LIFE,WELL I WILL GIVE YOU AN OPTION THIS TIME,WHAT OTHER WAY OF TRANSFER OF FUND DO YOU KNOW ABOUT?

DO YOU KNOW OF MONEY GRAM TRANSFER?

IF I LOOS MY PATIENCE,I WILL NOT REPLY TO YOUR MAIL AGAIN AND I WILL BE FORCED TO DO MY JOB SINCE YOU CAN NOT PAY UP.

To which I replied:

Quote:

Hitman,

Oh, yes I defiantly know of money grams I eat them every morning. I have attached a picture of my latest box.

And sent him this, yes I know I'm not a photoshop expert but I'm learning Embarassed

Moderator Joined: 10 Jan 2007 Posts: 14513

@jm -- great work, this lad is going thru hell, I love it Thumbs up

Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 10:59 am

He must be going through hell. I just "sent" him �5,000.00 to his bank account. He has not even responded to complain that the money is not there. Since I am typing this I must still be alive.

I think the next step is to try to get him to call me and discuss this matter since it is so urgent.

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