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Cachuma
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw
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 Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 9:43 pm |
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I thought things were going rather well in my bait. I was thisclose to getting a nice trophy. He'd originally proclaimed that he was a devout Catholic -- a Deacon, in fact! Until I told him I could never do business with someone outside my own faith...and it took him all of 3.7 miliseconds to renounce his life-long devotion to Catholicism and join my bizarre church. Here's how it was progressing:
From him:
| Quote: |
It gladens my heart when i am being offered such an opportunity like this,because it gives me the chance to make creative impacts in the ministry of God.
I am absolutely ready to learn about your ministry in as far as it wont restrict me from my daily transactions.Please i will like to point out that am not obliging to learn about your faith because i want you to be my payment representative,i am accepting solely because this opportunity act as a chance for me to work for God entirely outside the catholic faith. |
From me:
| Quote: |
My Dear Mr. Radford,
I sincerely appreciate your email. I apologize for taking so long to get back to you. My church keeps me so busy, witnessing to the faithless.
I am pleased to have gladdened your heart, and I hope to turn your heart into a festering cesspool of faith for our church. I believe we can do this together!
In the meantime, lets talk about how to get you started in our faith! I have spoken to my pastor, and he is very excited about having a new cretin to witness for our church in your area. The idea of spreading our word into another country is so exciting to him that he practically had an erection of faith.
I should tell you that we have a fund set aside just for new ministries, and we are happy to send money to our new faithful cretins, to help you in your efforts to start a new parish in your area. What I'm thinking now is, once I start the transactions with you, I can put the money that I make from that into this fund, so we'll be able to help more and more people worldwide!
Our usual first endowment is for the amount of $2,000.00. This seems to be enough to help a new cretin get started. Once I've sent you the money, we can go over all of the things that you will need to do to start your ministry.
Before I can do that, my pastor has asked me to obtain a photograph of you for our records. We need to know who you are, and we need proof that you truly want to join us in sending our message. All we need is one photograph of you holding a sign that says "I Am Cretin". That says that you want to become a cretin in our church.
I can't wait to start this new adventure! I promise you, Nicholas (may I call you that?) you will find everlasting faith and joy and a veritable cesspool of satisfaction in Almighty God through our church. I'll await your picture!
Sincerely in God's everlasting pool,
M1ldr3d |
From him:
| Quote: |
Your mail was recieved with ultmost joy,i will like to thank you again for rendering me this opportunity to work for God.Moreaslo your details was well comprehended and it will be fowarded to our customer immediately so we can commerse transactons.
I shall foward my photograph to you as soon as possible.You noted that i should hold sigh stating "I AM cretin",This will be fowarded you asap.
I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin,it is a rare privilegde.
Send my regards to your pastor.
Stay blessed. |
Then this morning I got this:
| Quote: |
Dear
What exactly does a cretin do.A cretin literally means a stupid person.
Thanks for the waste of time. |
Now how did he manage to find a dictionary in Nigeria?  |
_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas Radf@rd: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
   = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
 x15  X1  X1
 <---TS certified. |
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Quantos
Hello I'm New here!
Joined: 15 Apr 2007
Posts: 15
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| Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 9:57 pm |
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aw, so close. Too bad |
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Slightlyoutofit
Baiting Guru
Joined: 13 Feb 2007
Posts: 14310
Location: Foraging for Nuts.
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| Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 10:08 pm |
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| Quote: |
| I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin,it is a rare privilegde. |
That's a classic. |
_________________
   
   
God will see you true for all this you have done to me you bastard. - Collins Kalu
MAY THE HAND THAT TYPE ON KEYBORD BECOME STRICKEN AND TRANSMIT VIRUS TO YOU ENTIRE BODY. - Dr Linda Akeem
oh what a mess its time cabbage punks like u will be expose for trully what they are. - David Cole |
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Cachuma
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw
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| Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 10:12 pm |
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Yeah, I like that one...I'm putting it in my signature! LOL! |
_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas Radf@rd: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
= Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
x15 X1 X1
<---TS certified. |
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GeneralAbacha
419Eater is my life
Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 301
Location: Canada
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| Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 10:13 pm |
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No, no, he must have misunderstood you. A cretin is a native of Crete, from whence many of the early members of your church hailed. It is an honourific title. Slap him for his misunderstanding and lack of faith. |
_________________
x2
Also she said that we need to organized some girls for a lesbian club here , then we will used them and make money , but it will needs some financial support , that if you are here with us that it will be more easy to organized . I know some big girls here that in this lesbian club , they have nice sports car and live in good bungalow.
- Joyce Organ
I WOULD ADVICE YOU TO WRITE JUSTICE AMADU BELLO AND APPOLOGISE TO HIM, YOU SHOULD TELL HIM WHY YOU ARE SCARED IS BECAUSE OF THE BELLO IN HIS NAME. YOU SHOULD TELL HIM TO FIND YOUR HUSBAND FROM THE HANDS OF HOSTAGEER AND ARREST USMAN BELLO AND THE HOSTAGE GANGS.
-Charles Soludo |
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PsycheDelia_Smith
Baiting Guru
Joined: 30 Oct 2004
Posts: 3577
Location: Devon, UK
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Sun May 13, 2007 10:44 pm |
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^^Absolutely. How dare he refer to the brotherhood as stupid persons. |
_________________
SATISFIED CLIENTS:
"I was forced to sell off my designers black suit to be able to return back to Ouagadougou and on my coming back here my wife
took me to the cyber cafe and showed me the site where my photographs of circumcision was put on the net."-'Tosser' 0gugu0
"I am now completely twatted and shagged and will obey all your instructions to the fullest."-"Tosser" Oguguo
 "Frankily speaking,I wouldn't want to travel to the far east again."-Edward Smith, Lagos-Singapore (14600 miles round trip via Dubai)
9x 4 x Lagos-Accra , 3x Port Harcourt - Ibadan, 1x Lagos-Singapore, 1x Burkina-Bamako
   
 'Ed', 3 yrs 8 mnths 'Oguguo',6 years and 4 months |
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GomerPyle
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 8875
Location: Wherever I lay my hat
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Sun May 13, 2007 10:53 pm |
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From Wikipedia
| Quote: |
| The most common derivation provided in English dictionaries is from the Alpine French dialect pronunciation of the word Chretien - (a) Christian, which functioned as a form of greeting in those parts |
Of course I am omitting the rest - but if he refuses your request you can say he is effectively renouncing Christianity.
Only a Satanist or non-believer would behave the way he is.  |
_________________
Fake sites killed 1 x  9 x 3 x 168 X 
 - the 'Asparagus Kid' - Accra to Lome - You Must surly Die in The Name Of Jesus Christ
- Steve - Lagos to Accra
- Frank - Lagos to Cotonou - co-bait with the vampire
- Shorty - Lagos to Cotonou - My Agro Base farming where i rearing chicken and other animals was set ablazed overnight and we do not know who is actual behinde all these evils! -
I and my crew was locked up for 3 good days….They wanted to charge us to court but later we are fined an huge amount of money…I asked them why did they arrest the men, they started laughing and saying all sorts mockering words! -
…because now, am left with nothing and remember i told you my Guy (Joe) gave up earlier this morning |
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SlayerFaith
Baiting Guru
Joined: 03 Mar 2005
Posts: 5778
Location: Vegas, baby!
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| Posted:
Sun May 13, 2007 11:21 pm |
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| GeneralAbacha wrote: |
| A cretin is a native of Crete, from whence many of the early members of your church hailed. |
Very nice, General! |
_________________
  x2 x24  x7  x5 x5  x96 x2  x2 x2 x2 x2  x2  x3    x3      x2 x2 (in a team effort)
ANIMAL,MY FRIEND MY PRAYER IS THIS,LET ALL MY ENEMIES BE IN TROUBLE LIKE CHRIST INGIGE,AND LAZY PEOPLE LIKE YOU BE LIKE WABARA.THANK YOU- Kelechukwu Nduka
"Did he say they have an inflatable pig? That's sick!"- Crash, Vegas 06
"You can be a right Bitch sometimes SF"- Cherrie, GenChat 07
Naked Mod pics!
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rumbero
Baiting Guru
Joined: 06 Jun 2006
Posts: 3677
Location: All the Salsa Night Clubs
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 1:59 am |
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Your mugu need to be slapped big time. how dare he quetion the word cretin,
| Quote: |
| The idea of spreading our word into another country is so exciting to him that he practically had an erection of faith. |
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_________________
Lagos to Tamale. Rev. Frank Lagos to Abuja
Lagos to Abuja Pr1nc3 F@w@z
Ghana to Benin's Simba Camp Joe C@rlton
Lagos to Ghana Opus Dei Templar
Nukuru to Mombasa 1,500 kms van donation
Co bait with SlowFreddy Sao Tome island to Gabon Lagos to Abuja Co, donation
YOUR WIFE WILL GIVE BIRTH TO A MONKEY, YOU ARE GOING TO SUFFER FROM EPILEPTIC,
LET YOUR MOTHER FUCK YOUR BEST FRIEND. LET YOUR FATHER FUCK A MAD STREET WOMAN, USELESS INTERNET FRAUDSTER. (barrister Dan )
I bet u , soon , u will be laying in a close casket ,
will make u understand that i'm a spiritual man (Makinwa the retarded mugu)
in juses name u will dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
( Makinwa) |
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B. A. Ware
*** BANNED ***
Joined: 14 Apr 2007
Posts: 1828
Location: I've fallen and I can't reach my beer.
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Mon May 14, 2007 2:53 am |
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@ General AND Gomer,
VERY NICE. I was having trouble thinking of what Cachuma should do there and I didn't even come close to going in that direction. Kudos
 GeneralAbacha GomerPyle |
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Cachuma
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 3:17 am |
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You guys are geniuses. I'll give it a try and see how it goes. Stay tuned! |
_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas Radf@rd: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
= Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
x15 X1 X1
<---TS certified. |
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KeyserSoze
Elite Baiter
Joined: 06 Dec 2005
Posts: 1138
Location: Debo's pigeon coop
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Mon May 14, 2007 4:34 am |
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That is some hilarious stuff.
You could definately recover from that one though. Let us know what happens. |
_________________
"I was the head of the dradded occult menber in my university days.I have drank so many peoples blood physically if you dont know. so you people are too small for me ok?" - The soulless dunce cap lad
"WE HAVE REALLY SUFFERED GREATLY ON THIS 23 HOURS TRIP FROM IBADAN TO YOLA AND FINALLY TO MADUGURI. IT WAS A SERIOUS TERIBLE JOURNEY." - Kenny the healer - aprox 2500 miles
"I have worn your soul and I will Auction it to the land of the dead before 2 weeks. I laugh at your stupidity. I shall drink my early morning tea with your skull in the land of the dead by two weeks from now" - Cassidy the photographer -
x10 |
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icepeople
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 64
Location: United States
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Mon May 14, 2007 4:56 am |
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That's right. You definately have an interesting prospect in front of you. don't give up now. try to win him back. I think you will have lots of fun with this guy. Get yourself a trophy. We want to see it. |
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morbiczer
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 14 Jan 2006
Posts: 49
Location: Budapest
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 6:39 am |
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| Cachuma wrote: |
| Now how did he manage to find a dictionary in Nigeria? |
A simple Google search is probably more likely.
And why wouldn't there be dictionaries in Nigeria? |
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Cachuma
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 7:24 am |
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"Tongue-in-cheek: a term that refers to a style of humor in which things are said only half seriously, or in a subtly mocking way."
You're right! I found a dictionary ONLINE! Who'da thought! |
_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas Radf@rd: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
= Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
x15 X1 X1
<---TS certified. |
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GomerPyle
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 8875
Location: Wherever I lay my hat
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 8:02 am |
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That's the fun part - bringing him into your world of abstract reality. If you persuade him that up is down, you are in charge, and he is less likely to challenge you again as long, as you don't push it too far.
Now you have a seed of an idea, and whichever explanation you choose for using the word, you can exploit it, if he accepts it.
You certainly appear to have taken to baiting 'like a duck to water', if you don't mind me saying. It often takes people a while to get into the flow, especially the more wacky style. You never stop learning though as I haven't.
Just be sure to keep having fun, as you do your worthwhile work. |
_________________
Fake sites killed 1 x 9 x 3 x 168 X
- the 'Asparagus Kid' - Accra to Lome - You Must surly Die in The Name Of Jesus Christ
- Steve - Lagos to Accra
- Frank - Lagos to Cotonou - co-bait with the vampire
- Shorty - Lagos to Cotonou - My Agro Base farming where i rearing chicken and other animals was set ablazed overnight and we do not know who is actual behinde all these evils! -
I and my crew was locked up for 3 good days….They wanted to charge us to court but later we are fined an huge amount of money…I asked them why did they arrest the men, they started laughing and saying all sorts mockering words! -
…because now, am left with nothing and remember i told you my Guy (Joe) gave up earlier this morning |
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luckey
Moderator
Joined: 25 Jan 2007
Posts: 5672
Location: Check the lost and found
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 1:22 pm |
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He must not take that personally.
All men are cretins in the eyes of God until they have gone through the initiation rituals and cleansing ceremony of your ministry. Only then can they become a mooncalf. |
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Jimmy Jazz
Master Baiter
Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 174
Location: Slowly going around the bend
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| Posted:
Mon May 14, 2007 9:53 pm |
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Simple. A CRETIN is a very special member of your church. It is an acronym for Churchgoer Reflecting Eternal Truth In Nirvana. |
_________________
After all I have done for you, you still have the UTAHCITY to call me a fool - J*hn 1gwe
I like you because I can sense some kind of strictness in you which reassures me that you are a straigth forward person - M@mudu U5m@n
"I must tell you that you must be one of these internet bugs parasites" - An ongoing lad.
ASSHOL, EAT YOUR DEFICATE., USELESS SOON OF BITCH, POLICT TOILET AND A MISSRABLE ONDIGAR BORN TO BE FAUSTRATED FOR LIFE THAT IS WHAT YOUR ARE.OK - Barrister D0ugla5 Clarl3
x 4 |
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ParaNoid
** REMEMBERED **
Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 5123
Location: Looking for Steward.
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| Posted:
Tue May 15, 2007 2:22 am |
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@ luckey's comment, I was thinking similarly. A cretin would be the first step on his *new* spiritual journey!  You could then pass him up to newer and higher levels in the church.  |
_________________
Gold Coins here
  
x 4 <b>Looking for a Mentor? Click here</b>
"If I get mad at you, please just understand me. I am just being ParaNoid because I love you so much." - unknown
Visit www.scamwarners.com |
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