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Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 10:03 am

Heya Vp, you might get a call from one of my "Barrister "s looking for Robert or his sister Jaaaaanice.

Please get him to say his name several times Laughing

Robert is on holiday on eater island, and sis Jaaaaanice wont release any MORE money until he sends some decent identification through.

(this Hominidae got an asem that was half way through a scam, that was so long ago, he now really believes I had sent him $4800 already)

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 12:53 pm

@Slightlyoutofit

Collins called this morning, the usual convo, i said you were not in at the moment and I would pass his message to you to check your email Rolling Eyes

then he calls back later and when he asks for you I just say 'why, is there a problem with your payment?' too that he says 'OH i will go and check my email.' So it seems he did not actually want to talk to you anyway Twisted Evil

I am sure he will call back....I will stall and act ignorant as usual while you can implement your WU fun and games Laughing

EDIT:
Collins has just called back and is dismayed that there is no payment there..so I give him a plausable excuse. This can be used in many many ways as I only repete what 'I heard' Wink

so you can fit that into any situation.
http://media.putfile.com/collinspayment

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 1:29 pm

He's a grabby little bastard isn't he?
He only sent me the photos an hour or so before he called you.

There's one here: http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=106067

Unfortunately, I'm busy in meetings all day and then I'm out to play golf with the CEO later, so Collins isn't going to get his WU payment until tomorrow.
And as I told you in a PM, I believe WU is always losing payments so I'm eventually going to have to go out to Accra myself to organise things.

If he calls whining again, could you just keep him hanging for a while? He's obviously panicking and the longer the better.

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 1:59 pm

Great piccy!!! beers!

It is always good to see the lads being creative! I can stall him for as long as needed and somehow me thinks I will be spending more time trying to figure out where I am going on holiday rather than my boring job. Hmmm wonder if tourism is good where Collins lives..will have to ask about the weather and stuff Razz

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 3:05 pm

What is the current number lads have to ring now?

Smile

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 3:16 pm

07014219419 is the best one as I am fazing out the other ones. This one comes with the recordings. The best times to call are between 10am-5pm GMT, I usally answer other times it just really depends on how busy i am. It is always the lads fault if thet do not get through because they are not trying hard enough if they complain Wink

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 3:30 pm

Thanks for that. I gave it to my lad. If he rings he will be expecting to talk to a nun.

Laughing

Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 11:39 pm

I just realised the last 4 digits on your phone number... nice.

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:37 am

@VP Did Mohd Abdll4h ring for me? (Hearing impaired) he's emailed me to say he has but I think he's lying....

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 9:02 am

Hi VPM.
If Collins should call today (and I reckon he will), I'm not in the office but am attending an all day business lunch.
In reality, I'm waiting for Marvinator to knock me up another form, but that's another story. Wink

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 6:29 pm

Hi VP.
Has a Fr. King phoned for Fr. Steven Davis? He says he spoke to a nun. Was that you by any chance?

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 8:01 pm

HI VP,

You may get a call from my lovy lad, asking for Ms Chi Ting. I told him that my mother will answer the phone, but he still insisted.

some background info: You are located in the mountains of California, USA using a London based satellite phone provider.

EDIT: Feel free to use broken english. I told him that my mother English isn't that great. Wink

Can you please play the mother part? You can ask him for his credentials, background, sexual history... etc... because he wants to marry "your daughter".

Chi Ting is not home and she is at the shopping mall buying gifts.

Thanks a whole lot.

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 11:09 pm

Thanks everyone...looks like I will have lots of new friends soon Twisted Evil

. I have not been in most of the day and my mobile phone only worked now & then in the Derbyshire hills..so I may have spoken to your lads...one especially promised to buy me flowers...who he was or why he wanted to I dunno, I do suspect that it is that Soloudo charater though. I had another lad call but what language he was speaking I do not know....i started talking nonsense too and he seemed satisfied with it. So your lad(s) may have called and if they did not get me..then they were not trying hard enough Wink

Ahhhh just remembered...I did get a call for reverend father someone, and when I asked his name and what he wanted he got rather sharp with me..wanting to know why I was asking HIM questions. I told him I was sister someone and he should not be so rude..god speach..yadda..yadda. He then became apologetic and when I went to 'go get you' he only waited a min or so. So he should learn not to speak to a nun with such a sharp tounge Shocked

Baiting Guru Joined: 17 Sep 2006 Posts: 5905

^^^^

Explains why my lad is p'd off that you didn't "pick on the phone" Laughing

Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 4:27 pm

Call from Collins to say he has filled in the forms, which I see you have now received Laughing

http://media.putfile.com/collinsthursday

This is the one that wants Peter..sounds like he wants to buy crabs? from your PM this is a different lad if this is the one for Soloudo?? I cannot understand him much anyway so just tried to keep things simple Wink

http://media.putfile.com/flowers01
http://media.putfile.com/flowers02

Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 4:43 pm

Thanks VPM.
I've PMed you so you know you're gonna have to deal with him again. Crying or Very sad

Yanno. I don't like any lad, but I'm really beginning to loathe this guy with a vengeance. Luckily we're coming up to the part of the bait where both you and I can tell Collins just exactly what we think of him. Twisted Evil

Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 1:48 am

He got crabs! That is so funny!

The only reason I had half a chance of understanding this was because I knew his name and what he was *supposed* to say. Rolling Eyes

With the greatest of confidence, having read and fully understood the simplest of instructions given him, our intrepid Charles Soludo prepares to call my overworked, but always reliable "Gatekeeper of Security and Western Union Dollars."

I think it goes like this (and I leave out your replies, they're the best part and have to be heard Laughing

)

flowers01

Quote:

:Hello?
:It's all about hovercraft!
:It's all about hovercraft, hovercrafts!
:Hover, hovercrafts!
:How are you?
:Yeh, it's all about hover crabs!
:The hovercraft I bought is bad.
Sad

?) Peter, can you see?
:Yeh, Charles speaking, Charles. (I'm just guessing now Wink

:Charles, Charles!
:I'm talking about the, the, the (?) craft, the hovercrafts we bought. I did not tell me to buy you some flowers. (wow, he's really sounding like Arnold now.)
:(totally indecipherable) again.
:I should, ack, ah, I uh, shu, pro, call, yeh I will call you back...in next few minutes, please.
:...next few minutes, please.

I imagine at this point he starts second guessing himself and re-checks his email instructions. He learns again that all he need do is say the security pass-phrase: "My hovercraft is full of eels," leave his name if I'm not in, and always be nice to you, the Gatekeeper, as you control the tap on the money. (I also suggested he offer you flowers, because he'd been a bit rude the last time.)

And so -- how hard can this be?

flowers02

Quote:

:Hello?
:Yeah, it's all about hovercrafts, hovercrafts, and them many eels. I promise to buy you flower yesterday, to send you some flowers. Remember, me, Charles? {because I am being nice to you finally}.
:I say, about hovercrafts, hovercrafts. The craft I bought was, it was a hover craft with (sounding totally disgusted) with eels, you know, eel. And I promise to send you some flowers about yesterday.
:Okay. Ah ah, ah. (he's not sure he's made it past security yet.)

And then I think he asks repeatedly for me, and more of the same hovercraft business, lol!

Most excellent work, VP! It was perfect, that got him firmly hooked. And since then I've gone into business selling militarized, stealth hovercrafts. (It's ALL making sense to him now, uh-huh.) Twisted Evil

Thanks so much, VP! (I'll keep you posted.)

Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 10:45 am

Thanks PJ
It does make abit more sense now..I thought it may have been hovercraft but then I though..No couldnt be Laughing

My daughter seem to think it was funny when I was asking him if he had crabs... Shocked

I decided to act too overworked as I just could not make him out at all..maybe soon I will let him through security and actually go and get you...sure hope he does not hang the phone up impatiently or he may need to re-start security proceedings again Wink

Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 12:50 pm

Just had a call from a really ignorant angry twat..and he is REALLLY pissed off. Here I am working in the garden enjoying the sunshine and this one rings...this audio is about the 3rd or 4th..the first few are him asking for 'whoever' and then hanging up and calling back..so I was not so pleased when he finally decided to speak....and now I think he has insulted me Laughing

like I care Twisted Evil

so if he is yours..he may need a cuddle now

http://media.putfile.com/angry-twat

Master Baiter Joined: 29 Nov 2006 Posts: 113

Hi VP

Hopefully you'll get a call from M1ke L1vi for Fellat1o L1ngu1n1 about f1ux capacit0rs again!! If you see this before he calls, could you please tell him I've had his invoice and have gone to the bank to send the money - If you want to mess with his head and tell him I've gone to a week ago tuesday to do it, all the better!!!

chc

Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2007 8:19 am

Call this morning that came from a lad that said he was Jack Princewell????
talking about a mrs Binta?? I cannot belive that he thought I was a woman Evil or Very Mad

and he apologised for calling me such Laughing

anyhow if he is yours you can either play it as 'straight' and have a girley voice or you can say I am really your wife/mother/sister/gfriend/.... being nosey. Oh and I promised to send my drivers license, which of course should be wrapped in a huge .dll file named as such Wink

lemme know how u play it as he sounds like he may call back again Shocked

http://media.putfile.com/MrSomebody

Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2007 9:48 am

I got M05es from this thread on at the moment - wants a number to contact me when he receives his payment. Told him this is my office number & I've got a very pleasant secretary.

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 24 Jan 2007 Posts: 85

VP,

Jack Princew311 was one of mine so many thanks for taking the call.

"I am sorry if I did embarass you with one of the questions I asked you during our phone conversation this morning. I sincerely apologise ok."

At lease him emailed me an apology!

Ive now contacted him back and sent him my driving licence, of course its only the size of a postage stamp so I expect him to get out the magnifiying glass for that one.

Thanks again,

Frank.

Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2007 9:59 am

If anyone can understand anything that this lad was grunting..lemme know Rolling Eyes

I don't think it is anthing to do with English?phone number 002348080657xxx
http://media.putfile.com/wtf-13-13

This one asks for Bello? I think maybe they ment Fellatio?? Laughing

http://media.putfile.com/bello-25
http://media.putfile.com/bello2

This one is for Martin, I am your ever so nonhelpful cleaner who does not pass along messages
http://media.putfile.com/4Martin

@frankspenser..yeah, I wanted to see if I could catch them off guard by saying I was a bloke, they usally do not ask..although I kicked myself for not explaing the sex change in graphic detail

Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2007 10:27 am

B3ll0's for me Very Happy

poor chap's having problems with his MTCN for Moneygram. Can't listen to the call though - keep getting an error message 'invalid playlist format' Sad

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