Crusade to a fetish village (Dec 13th trying 4 my safari)

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Posted: Wed Nov 29, 2006 10:53 pm

i dunno what to say, this lad is so bleedin stupid. Shocked

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 12:28 am

@SP What can't you do with this guy? Very Happy

Quote:

MOREOVER I DO NOT THINK "Fohr-Un-Ein-Eetar" WILL BE GLAD THAT THINGS HAVE TURNED OUT THIS WAY.

You are wrong, again, Brother Donald! We are very pleased that things have turned out this way! Nice job, SP. Laughing

Posted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 10:06 am

This STINKS. Stinks that is of safari material, all the way to Rome with a special package, maybe a bag of flour, or some PlayDoh (Silly Putty) attached to a watch with some wires, for His Eminence the Pope. To be delivered in person with email documention saying that this package was requested by the Pope himself. Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

The Pope has sent Donald an email:

Quote:

Dearest faithful subject, Donald,

From the tone of your email, you are asking me to forgive Father O'H for the things he has said, and indeed done to both his Bishop and myself?

Are you aware of what Father O'H is really like? I have known him for an extremely long time, whilst he is mostly good, he also has an evil streak, at times, he acts like the devil incarnate, he has deep seated problems that he needs to deal with, and he has a terrible violent streak, drinking does not help his problems, it makes them worse.

I don't know how much he has told you about himself, but I could tell you many stories of the things he has done, for instance, did you know that he once attacked me and put me in hospital? He has the ability to be a very angry and violent man, and when he drinks, there is no stopping him from doing things that he might later regret.

I will give you another example of his anger and violence, approximately 25 years ago, he was sharing a room with me in a hotel whilst we were both attending a religious seminar in Italy, in the evening after the seminar, we decided to play the card game called poker to pass the time, Father O'H decided he wanted a drink and ordered a bottle of vodka from room service, I was not happy about that as I know how he can become after a drink.

Anyway, we played cards and the evening was enjoyable, then all of a sudden, he accused me of cheating at cards, he demanded to look up my sleaves to see if I was hiding cards up there, but there were none there, he took my hand of cards off me, tore them up, threw them in my face, puched me in the stomach and face, he broke 3 of my teeth and broke 2 of my ribs, that is the violent sort of man Father O'H is, and you expect me to forgive him for his recent excesses?

All these years later, he has still not apologised to me over the poker incident, I would not have minded being accused of cheating had I been cheating, but I wasn't, I did have a good hand of cards when he accused me.

I have still got the torn cards from my hand that Father O'H tore up and threw in my face, I kept them as a reminder, the cards I had were the "queen of diamonds", "queen of hearts", "queen of clubs", "jack of clubs", and the "10 of diamonds", I told him that the poker game would come back to haunt him one day, and so it has, you should ask him to apologise to me for calling me a cheat and ask him to hold my 5 cards up as a sign of his apology to me, I may then forgive him for the things he has said to me recently.

One other thing Donald, please do not kneel down to type when sending me an email, I am a mere man like you, the only difference is that I am the head of the church and hold a high ranking title, and please do not email me using all capital letters, it is considered bad manners to type in all capitals.

Please tell me more about your church in Nigeria, I would like to know all about you, what position do you hold in the church?

Donald should now email Father O'H and tell him to hold the cards up to apologise, of course, I will refuse to apologise to an ass like Benedict, and ask Donald to make the 5 cards and hold them, which he should do if he has any respect for the Pope, then again, he is skint, but it is for the Pope after all Laughing

, if not, I will tell the Pope of Donald's refusal to do it, Donald's church may face trouble from the Pope over it Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Lads are so predicatable Very Happy

, he just mailed Father O'H, the Pope told him not to write in all caps, so he is now writing with the first letter of each word capitalised Rolling Eyes

, he forwarded me the Pope email I sent to him and this is Donalds's email to me:

Quote:

Dear Father,

This Is A Copy Of The Pope's Reply To Me.

I Have Not Replied again To Him,Probably Because I Need To Seek Your Consent. Please Father, Can You Do As He Just Said Because I Can See That He Still Has A Forgiving Portion In His Mind For You.

He Also Warned Me To Stop Using Capital Letters while Writing Him,That It Conotes Bad Manners,I Never Knew About This Before.

Please Father ,Get Back To Me As Soon As Possible So That I Can Reply His Mail.

Yours Brotherly In Christ

Donald

I have replied to Donald with:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pedro,

Thank you for your email, I see the Pope is still whining about the poker game all those years ago, if he thinks I am going to apologise to him and hold pictures of the torn cards up in a sign for him, he can go and take a flying f*ck at a rolling doughnut, the Pope is a miserable little bastard and I hate him.

I know damn well he was cheating at cards that night, but I can't prove how he did it, he is an expert card player and he also does card tricks, so I just know he was cheating somehow, he kept on getting poker hands with 4 aces, or 4 kings, or 4 jacks, that is not luck, that is cheating, so tell him to stick his cheating head up his cheating arse, I will not hold up his 5 poker cards on a photo or say sorry to him, if someone else wants to do that with the cards they can, but I will not, it's up to you what you want to reply to him, and you don't need my permission to reply to him each time you mail him!

Blessings,

Father O'H

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 7:34 pm

@SP

Quote:

so he is now writing with the first letter of each word capitalised

hehehe this guy's brain is really messed up! Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Received a couple of emails from my lad today, both to me and the Pope, where he tells the Pope all about his church etc, as I have said before, I might have stopped this bait a long time go, if not for the fact that I sent my lad an A.S.E.M to make sure he was a scammer and he replied asking me to change the payment details to a different name, and then someone with a different email address from his church with the same IP offered me a �200,000 payment for our fire disaster appeal, which would have been a fakey cheque or account flashing, why would they want a �2000 grant if they could give me �200,000, so at that point, they dug their hole even deeper.

This was his email to the Pope this morning, he sent me a copy of it as well:

Quote:

His Eminence My Lord,

Let me start by telling you about my church.

My church is the xxxxxxxx church and it is a Pentecostal church, it was founded by reverend pastor fxxxx dxxxxxxs in 2003. We are just a congregation trying to survive . Presently we have a population of about 234 members and we are yet to get a permanent site.the structure we have presently is built with about twenty bundles of galvanized roofing sheets both the body and roof.

I am just a pronounced member of the church,I oversee the choir activities and most times when the reverend or his wife is not available,I can hold the service on their behalf until they arrive.

People within my terrain always take me to be an auxiliary pastor but I am not. We believe that reverence must be GOD ALMIGHTY�S calling which I have not been called to be frank with you.

As a result of financial incapabilities,I started scouting for grants via the internet with the permission of my general overseer reverend fxxxx Dxxxxx.

Then I came across the church of gxxxxxxx and I applied for a grant of 2000 pounds. Then I was told that my grant will be given me only if I will show enough commitments.Actually,our main reasons for the grant then was to chase and destroy a deity in my remote village that is believed to be eating up pregnant women feotus.and at this juncture,Father o�h said that we must undergo a cleansing process before we can go into that spiritual warfare.In The process of doing this,we were attacked and many got injured and unfortunately a church sister lost her life. This which we did two times because the first one was substandard. Father Said That the Church Will compensate The Family of the deceased to the tune of 3000 pounds due to their continous arresting and rearresting me.

After this,we did all They requested of us as A Preriquisite to getting our grant ,then paradventure,The Church fire Disaster came In At The Point Of My Getting My Grant.

At This Point we started doing all they asked us to do in order to help them realize the estimated 1.5 million pounds to repair the church. All these we did until the money was reached and when Father Approached The Bishop On behalf of Our Grant And Compensation,Hence This Problem Ensued Which Even led To Father Using Harsh Words On You.

Please My Lord Most Eminent. Please Have Mercy Upon me. Atleast My Grant Can Be Canceled But The Compensation Of The deceased woman�s Family Is Paramount.She Is From The same Village With Me And Her Kins men and Relative Will Be On My neck If The Compensation as promised Do not come.

Your Everly Faithful and Loyal Servant
Brother Donald

He sent this to Father O'H Very Happy

:

Quote:

Dear Father,

I can remember sometime in one of my mails where I used The word "crap",You Almost God Infuriated At Me But Know I am so Surprised In The Manner Which You Use Vulger Words Like "fuck!Fuck!! Arse!!!.

Please Father,Calm Down. When Two Elephants Are Fighting{you and The Pope} It Is The Grasses That Suffer It Most{we The Grantees}.

I Have Suffered So Much to get this Grant Both Expences Since May this Year When I applied. What Shall Be My Fate?

I Will Be Glad If You Let Me Know. I Am Going To Ask The POPE Also What Our Fate Will Be Especially The Deceased Woman"s Compensation.

Best Regards

Brother Donald

The Pope will ask him about the playing cards later, and Father O'H will ash him to make them.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 4:15 pm

@SP

Quote:

Please Father,Calm Down. When Two Elephants Are Fighting{you and The Pope} It Is The Grasses That Suffer It Most{we The Grantees}.

He almost sounds like an educated lad here. Laughing

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 12:12 am

@ Scam Patroller

I can see more trophies coming from the lad. The lad has to show the Pope that he is a devoted christian. Have the lad show the Pope that he is loyal and have him perform the secret ritual that all Popes must go through. Have the Pope make a promise to the mugu that he will take care of all the expenses.
The only trouble with this, is, that the mugu will have to travel to the Vatican to recieve the payment. If he lad will not come to see the Pope you will be excommunicated.
( how much faith does the lad have for your ) Laughing

Will he let you be thrown from the church or will he make the ultimate sacrifice.

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 12:30 am

Quote:

the Pope told him not to write in all caps

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Neither myself nor the Pope have replied to laddy since the other day, so laddy sent me a short email today:

Quote:

Dear Father,

I hope Every thing is Ok? I Was Expecting your Mail The Day Before Yesterday as Well as Yesterday.

His Eminence Has Not Even Replied My Mail To Him.

Best Regards

From Brother Donald

I have now replied to him as Father O'H, and also forwarded it to the Pope at the same time for him to see what I have asked the lad to do, this will be hard for him to wriggle out of now that the Pope knows about what has been asked of him, will he do it, lets see how loyal he is to the Pope Laughing

:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, sorry for not replying sooner, I have been very busy with a backlog of church work that has built up recently.

I think the reason the Pope has not replied to you is because he may also be busy, I saw him on television yesterday, he is currently in Turkey visiting a moslem mosque, so that may explain him not replying to you yet.

I have had an idea, you know that I will not bow down by taking a photo holding up his torn playing cards, but maybe, to clear the air between us, you might like to act as a go-between, so if you would be willing to take the photos on my behalf and send them to the Pope, that would certainly clear the air between us and he would accept that as an apology from me.

I see you forwarded me his email with the list of his torn cards, so all you would have to do is make some copies of these cards:

Obviously, because he is the Pope and head of the church, and because he is an amateur magician who does card tricks and has a great interest in playing cards, they will need to be more than just a photocopy of a playing card, so you will have to do something quite special instead, I have attached 2 images to this email of different "queen of hearts" to give you some ideas of what to do.

One of the images shows a queen of hearts surrounded by the other playing cards from the deck, the other image shows a woman wearing a queen of hearts card, I would like you to combine the 2 together, so make a large white piece of card like the woman is wearing in one of the images, and on it, paint a large queen of hearts surrounded by all the other playing cards in the deck, you can stick the playing cards around the edge with some glue.

Make one large card for each of the 5 cards the Pope wants listed above, remember to use red paint for the "diamonds" and "hearts" and black paint for the "clubs", then wear the card like the woman does and send the photos to the Pope, it would also help if you or whoever wears the cards will be dresses like a queen, that will be sure to clear my name with the Pope, and I am sure that the Pope will think very highly of you for doing it, it will be of great benefit to your church, the Pope is a very powerful man, and he can make good things happen for you and your church, I have forwarded this email to the Pope so that he can see what I have asked you to do for him, please don't let me and the Pope down, Brother Donald, than you again for helping me and the Pope to be at peace again!

Blessings,

Father O'H

I attached these 2 images to give him an idea of what I want doing:

@ Rumbero, I was thinking of a ritual ceremony, well you know how when they vote in a new Pope, everyone wathces the chimney of the vatican to see the smoke turn from black smoke to white smoke, I might tell him that people think that means the Pope has been chosen, as it does, but there will be twist in there somewhere, and he will have to replicate the ritual that people don't see Very Happy

Posted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 11:55 pm

@ SP
was thinking along the same lines. what a priviledge for the mugu to perform the secret ceremony that only a few get to see, Laughing

I cant wait to see the new trophies.

I love the playing cards. Everything seems to fit just right. Hope you kiss and make up with the Pope

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

The Pope has emailed the lad, I rambled on a bit about nothing much, boosting his ego a bit, offered him a job at the Vatican working for me, if he accepts, he will no doubt ask for money to travel, but everyone knows that all prospective employees have to get to the Vatican under their own steam, it is viewed by us as a pilgrimage Laughing

, told him I am looking forward to seeing the cards Father O'H wants him to make blah blah blah:

Quote:

Dearest faithful subject, Donald,

Please accept my apologies for my lateness in replying to your email, as Father O'H correctly pointed out in the email to you that he forwarded to me, I have been visiting a mosque in Turkey and other official duties, but now find the time to write to you.

After reading Father O'H's email and his request made to you, if you were to make the playing cards and take photographs of yourself or others wearing them, I would be most willing to accept his apology on your behalf.

By making those playing cards for me, you are showing me what great loyalty you have towards me and the church.

I read your last email with both happiness and sadness, happy that you are making the most of what you have got in Nigeria, and at the same time, sad that you are struggling to worship in a temporary shelter for a church made from steel sheeting, the Lord will provide for those that help themselves, and the ability and fortitude you have shown will reap you many rewards, not only in heaven, but also in your time on earth.

I can see that you do a lot of work for your church, what with overseeing the choir and holding services, you truly are a man of great resource and a credit to your church, not to mention all the work you have carried out for the Church of G's fire appeal, I am very impressed with your work and whole attitude, I truly wish there were more people like you.

Have you ever thought of working in the church overseas? I currently have a number of job vacancies at the Vatican, one of which is a job as my personal assistant, the job would entail you travelling all over the world with me to my official engagements, you would be responsible for preparing my official dress, acting as my press secretary, dealing with the the press, including magazine, newspaper and television reporters where you would issue press releases to them, you would liaise with church officials to work out my daily schedule, and many other daily tasks.

Should you be interested in a job working for me, I would be most happy to offer you employment, the salary is generous, you would attend many state functions with me, and I would also make sure that your church in Nigeria is very well looked after, I think it is time you had proper church premises in which to worship and I can take care of that for you, please do let me know your thoughts about working for me.

I look forward to seeing the playing cards that you make, I see that Father O'H told you that I am an amateur magician, that is correct, I have been practicing card tricks since I was a child and I always carry a pack of cards with me no matter where I go. Let me tell you a short funny story, shortly after I was ordained as Pope, I visited England and attended Buckingham Palace to meet with Her Majesty the Queen, when it was time to meet her, I entered the room and bowed before her, as I did, a pack of cards fell from one of the inner pockets of my official dress and landed on the floor in front of her, the Queen laughed and asked if I always carried cards, I told her that I did.

She aksed if I would like to play a card game called bridge later in the evening, and we agreed to play, I don't know if you know much about the Queen, but she likes to gamble, she owns many racehorses which she bets on, and she asked if I wanted to play cards for money, I did not wish to offend her because of who she is, so we played cards for money and I won �500 off her, it was quite funny taking money from the Queen, she handed me ten �50 notes, and of course, her face is on all English bank notes, so I asked her to sign one of the �50 notes for me, can you imagine how much that bank note with her signature would be worth if I ever wanted to auction it on E-Bay? I asked a valuer at London auction house, Sothebys, to value it for me, and he told me it would be worth approximately �500,000 at auction because it is so rare, I would never sell it, I keep it in a nice frame on my bedside table and smile when I look at it.

Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 1:38 am

caN yoU geT hiM tO capatilsE thE lasT letteR oF everY worD?

Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 3:32 am

Great letter SP.

I can see all the doors you have stablish to take the bait anywhere you want pending on the reply from the mugu.

I hope you are going to offer the signed note by the queen. Your mugu would be most delighted.

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

The Pope got a reply, he sent it to Father O'H and I thought he had sent it to me by mistake, but he had CC'd it to me, he's asking the Pope to get Father O'H to give him �30 to make the cards Rolling Eyes

Quote:

His Eminence,My lord,

I am So Willing To Hold up The Cards As An Apology On behalf Of Father O'H But Due To some Financial Constraints Accrued From The Onset Of My Applying For Grant As Well as My Mother's Recent Burial, I Would Need A Little Financial Support From Father H. Only 30 Pounds Will Help Me Do This. You Can Talk To Him If He Really Trusts Me And Feels For My Suffering All These Months,Then A Token Of 30 pounds Will Clear The Air.

His Eminence, As regards Your Offer of a job in your office, I would Highly appreciate It But I Am Not Too Good In Other Languages Other Than The English Language. (that's good, we all speak English, so it's a start Very Happy

)

Please I Need A Little Financial Support To Put Me Back On Track.

Your Faithfully

Brother Donald

The Pope has replied:

Quote:

Dearest faithful subject, Donald,

Good afternoon to you, in respect of the job I offered you, the fact that you only speak English does not exclude you from doing the job, staff in the Vatican are from all over the world, everyone speaks in English because it's a universal language, your written English is also excellent, so you need not worry about languages, this could be a very good job for you and your church.

Whilst I understand your current financial predicament, I am not allowed to intervene in the business between yourself and Father O'H, even if I were on good terms with him, he would probably ignore my email, I'm sure you know how obstinate he can be at the best of times, and of course, I myself am not allowed to help you financially at this juncture, to make something that is essentially being made for me.

Donald, you are a man who has shown great resourcefulness, I am very confident in your ability to find the �30 you require to make the playing cards that Father O'H has requested, this is a great test of your inner strength and loyalty to myself and the church, I know you are fuelled with the desire to succeed.

If I was in your position, I would try a number of things to raise money, for instance, you have over 200 people who are members of your church, you could organise a raffle where they all buy a ticket ad you can give a small prize, or ask them to make cakes to sell in the market to raise the funds, there are many things you can do, how about sponsored praying, they can sponsor you for the number of hours you spend praying, the longer you pray, the more you raise per hour, these are just some ideas for you to consider.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 6:23 pm

@SP - Brother Donald always has to do his little bit of begging before he undertakes his many good works for you. He's so predictable! Laughing

But I have every confidence that he will find a way to please Father O'h. Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

The Steelers banner for Reprob8 has arrived in the US Very Happy

Unfortunately, Reprob8 tells me my lad has made a serious error on it banghead

, he will post pictures when he finishes work in about 5 hours time.

If it's a spelling error, he can blame the artist and have him do it again, git.

[edit]

This is the error:

Pittsburgh Steelsrs
Here we go Steelers
Here we go

The artist put an s instead of an e in the first Steelers, what a dumbass Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:18 pm

That just happens to be my new avatar.

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Reprob8 has posted the Steelers banner, here:

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=769047

Shame about the spelling mistake Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 12:37 am

^^^ Nah, Reprob8 will be safe if he waits until the rest of crowd is drunk before he pulls it out at the next game You should be thinking "shame about the need for a much larger redo" Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 5:11 am

Quote:

Anyway, we played cards and the evening was enjoyable, then all of a sudden, he accused me of cheating at cards, he demanded to look up my sleaves to see if I was hiding cards up there, but there were none there, he took my hand of cards off me, tore them up, threw them in my face, puched me in the stomach and face, he broke 3 of my teeth and broke 2 of my ribs, that is the violent sort of man Father O'H is, and you expect me to forgive him for his recent excesses?

Tell him to meet Reprob8 and myself in Vegas. Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Neither Father O'H or the Pope have heard from my lad for a few days, I just sent him an email from Father O'H asking for an update on the cards, no doubt he will reply saying money is a problem or he has given up:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, again, I can only apologise for not not getting back to you sooner, this has been due to the huge backlog of church work, and the ongoing building work, plus we have had a major problem with our email database, I have now repaired it, which is a relief.

I received the last email that the Pope sent to you, where he offered you some suggestions on how to get the �30 you need, by means such as making cakes, having raffles or sponsored prayers etc, all of which are good ideas for raising funds, so I was just wondering how you are getting on with the task of making the cards for the Pope, are they in progress?

I know the Pope is a man of little patience, he hates to be kept waiting, I expect he has been nice to you so far and you probably have not seen his other side, he can be quite demanding, especially when it comes to things like playing cards, so I hope you are making good progress on making them as I directed with the reference images that I sent to you, please let me have an update.

Thank you, Brother Donald, for all of your work, it is very much appreciated by all in the church, you reap what you sow, you have sowed a lot, and so shall you reap your rewards in the end!

Blessings,

Father O'H

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

I hate this lad at times, well, all of the time Very Happy

, if he can't or wont do something, he just doesn't bother emailing, twat Evil or Very Mad

, now his church members are not sure if I am genuine Rolling Eyes

, the cheek of it:

Quote:

Dear Father,

It Is Quite Unfortunate That All Of The Church Members Refused . They Were Like Saying That Am I Sure If You Are Genuine?

I Have Tried All I Can But To No Avail,I Do Not Know How To Tell The Pope This,So I Kept Mum.

As It Stands Father,I Cannot Do This.

All My Christian Love

Brother Donald

My reply to him:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, again, I am very shocked and angry to hear you say that you and your church members think I may not be genuine, do you honestly think I would spend all of these months emailing you if I was not genuine?

I have better things to do than emailing people for the hell of it, I am flabbergasted by your suggestion that I am ungenuine, I have never been spoken to like that before, I demand a handwritten apology from you on behalf of your church members.

I shudder to think what the Pope will have to say about this, I have heard that he has already told people that you are making the cards for him, everyone in the Vatican knows about it, and now you say you can't or wont do it for him.

I have told you before how nasty he can be, it wouldn't surprise me if he went out of his way to have you church closed down and have your Pastors/Priests and Bishops excommunicated from the church, he will surely be very angry with you and your church members, I would hate to be in your shoes, Brother Donald, I emplore you to make the cards for him, not only for your sake, but also for the sake of your church, the spirit of is also stirring, this is not good, not good at all, all sorts of terrible things could be unleasehed upon your church and village people, please do something for your own sakes!!!!!

Blessings,

Father O'H

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Received a very short reply from my lad:

Quote:

Dear Father,

There Is Nothing i Can Do At This point,I Am Helpless and Handicapped (you will be handicapped if you don't pay the deceased womans family Laughing

). God knows.

Brother Donald

I wonder if he will change his tune about accepting money from me if I do a runner with the �1.5 milion, his neck is on the block after all.

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