The making of a TWAT (Dec. 1 - NEW VIDEO - p.10)

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Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 2:41 am

holy crap that it huge. Great work you guys.

Will he will need to fix it of course? It looks like it could be a lot taller.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 15 Jan 2006 Posts: 62

At least need pictures from other angles to be sure it isn't only 2 dimensional. Great job - I've been waiting to see if any of them bit...

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:09 am

I thought pyramids were supposed to be made out of stone... Are those sandbags? Shocked

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:10 am

This makes me so happy.

Top job guys!!!

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:20 am

that deserves a medal clapping

Keep up the good work

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:23 am

I can't help be think they cheated by building it next to a wall. I'm betting the wall is supporting it and that they climbed up on the wall to build it. That's why it's so skinny.

Jolly good work though guys!

Can I reqeust an aerial shot of the next one? So that you can confirm there isn't anything blocking the energy flow to and from the all seeing eye.

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:39 am

Now that is just completely amazing. The things people will do for their religious beliefs. And to grab a little cash, of course.

YeaWhatever, you are truly an inspiration to us beginners.

The base is nothing like what was specified in the brochure, though. They looked so happy in that photo - wouldn't you like to see their faces when they find they have to tear it down and start over?

Maybe version 2 of the directions should specify all dimensions in cubits?

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:50 am

@YW, I noticed that the manual is quite specific is stating that the eye is to be made from a flammable material.

Is this so that if the pyramid doesn't meet with the specifications then the eye can be burnt to ceremonially cleanse the site from the blasphemy of a distorted faith before a new, correctly proportioned pyramid can be built?

hint hint...

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 4:08 am

419weasel wrote:

I thought pyramids were supposed to be made out of stone... Are those sandbags? Shocked

Yes. Those are sandbags, just like the instruction manual specified.
<a href="http://yeawhatever.catholiccall.org/twat/pyramid.pdf" target="_blank"> Pyramid Building Instruction Manual</a>
(If you get a promt to enter a password, enter CDXIX)

But obviously we are greatly disappointed with the shape. It is supposed to look more like this one (which we PhotoChopped). Laughing

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 4:34 am

This is brilliant on so many levels..Top stuff gents.. Laughing

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 4:41 am

Knowing lads, those are probably stolen bags of rice from the local Red Cross food aid depot.

*** BANNED *** Joined: 10 Jan 2004 Posts: 3779

Suicidal mugus. What if this unstable 70� pyramid collapses during the necessary orgiastic rituals?

The ideal pyramid angle of course depends on the material in the sandbags. 25� for wet sands, 27.5� - 30� for rounded sands, 32� - 35� for sharp edged sands, 32� - 37� for gravel, 37� - 45� for pebble, 40� for salt or cement. A pocket calculator will help if they used different materials.

Wink

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 5:02 am

YeaWhatever wrote:

Yes. Those are sandbags, just like the instruction manual specified.

...

But obviously we are greatly disappointed with the shape. It is supposed to look more like this one (which we PhotoChopped). Laughing

You guys are just too much fun!

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 6:38 am

So which of one those guys in the picture is the mugu-mind behind this whole operation? I find it hilarious that the idiot dragged his entire family into it.

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 9:08 am

Looks like they've used bags of fertiliser?

They need to sprinkle some magic Aluminium power on it for cement, then cover it with polyurethane bags so it doesn't get wet. Last they need to set light to it just to make sure it will pass local fire safety regulations! Very Happy

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 11:49 am

YW - PM for you!

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 1:55 pm

Hehehehe...not a bad first attempt. He is used to doing things over and over again until they are right so no worries there. We'll make sure it is the proper dimensions as well as 3 dimensional.

15 hours of work? They dont look that sweaty. Hopefully the next pyramid will take him a few days. Oh, and the eye...he needs to work on that as well...I have some ideas for that and will fill you in when we chat today.

BW

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 4:30 pm

Our church was happy to see the Monument of Faith. I sure hope that the church's founder does not have a problem with the F'd up dimensions. Laughing

Quote:

Dear Omoruyi,

I received your photograph of your Monument of Faith. It is refreshing to see that you have the support of your family for such a project. I can see that you are a man of faith and of your word.

I have already forwarded the photo to Rev. Phystme, the founder of TWAT. Hopefully, he will not mind the fact that your pyramid does not meet the specifications. I have never seen one with a base less than 4 meters square so I do not know how he will react. Only Rev. Phystme has the final word about these matters.

Also, I have made inquiries about our construction engineer. He is aware that there may be a trip required to West Africa soon. He is a good man and will serve you well. I think that you two will get along nicely. Right now, he is in the United States, in the middle of another church construction.

As soon as I hear back from Rev. Phystme, I will let you know.

Blessings,
--
Reverend Benjamin Dover

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Feb 2005 Posts: 2301

Those kids are going to hate their father for being a scammer, and making them build a worthless pyramid. It's wonderful to know that you're going to destroy them the way they've destroyed families elsewhere. Twisted Evil

EXCELLENT JOB!!!!

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 5:30 pm

Quote:

Please welcome the new guest host, Hillary Clinton as she conducts this informative demonstration.

Page 4 of the manual, third line, it should be "...fewer and fewer sacks...".

Page 7 of the manual, line four, should say "...and heaven to see, and will entitle you to join..."

Are you planning on having more lads do this elsewhere?

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 5:39 pm

^^^^
Of course. We have membership applications out to several lads already. Once they become a member, that is when they are approached about becoming a minister. Being a minister is where the big money is. And of course, to be a minister, you need to build a Monument of Faith.

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 6:00 pm

Can you say GULLIBLE? Here is his response.

Quote:

DEAREST REVEREND BENJAMIN DOVER,
MANY THANKS FOR YOUR PREVIOUS MAIL. I DIDN'T REALLY MEAN TO DISAPPIONT YOU ON THE TASK. THOUGH WE MEASURED 4 METERS ON THE GROUND AND 5 METERS HIGH, BUT I AM SUPRISE THAT IT SEEMS NOT BIG ENOUGH. PLEASE DO GET IN TOUCH WITH REV. PHYSTME SO WE WOULD KNOW THE OUTCOME IF WE ARE TO MAKE IT LARGER. (I think that we already know the answer to this, don't we?)AS FOR THE CONSTRUCTION ENGINEER, I PROMISE TO GIVE HIM THE BEST RECEPTION HE WOULD EVER HAVE. HE WILL ENJOY EVERY BIT OF HIS STAY HERE IN WEST AFRICA. NIGERIA TO BE MORE PRECISE.

PLEASE DO FEEL FREE TO ASK OF ANYTHING FROM ME. AND I MUST COMMEND YOUR SUPPORT TOWARD THE SUCCESS MADE SO FAR. YOU ARE A MAJOR COMTRIBUTOR AS WELL AS REVEREND TED. GOD BLESS YOU.
PST. OMORUYI S.A IRABOR.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Jul 2004 Posts: 7

These pyramids remind me of "You simply don't just walk into Mordor!!"

When I look at all these safaris and stunts, its amazing to see that we're able to bait them at their own game and they're swallowing it up.

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

Quote:

YOU ARE A MAJOR COMTRIBUTOR

I'd say that ranks right up there with "Sun Rises in the East" in the "Bleeding Obvious Statement" category.

(Althought I'm still not exactly sure what a "comtributor" is. I used to think it was a part of my car, but now I'm not so sure.)

Posted: Mon Nov 06, 2006 7:26 pm

YW - As usual, I am flabbergasted at your talent!

Any thoughts on the pyramid relocation ceremony? I have suggested previously that it be derived from a plains Indian sun dance ritual, which I think would be totally in keeping with the spirit and theology of your church.

However, I think any sufficiently "moving" ceremony, full of spiritual meaning, solemn ritual, and ghastly tattoos would make for a perfectly satisfactory pyramid relocation ceremony.

Bruin

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