Crusade to a fetish village (Dec 13th trying 4 my safari)

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Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 2:54 am

Oh Biiiiilllllll? Biiiilllll? Laughing

We're dying here!!!! Let's do it up right!!!!

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Got an email from the lad since ignoring him for 4 days, it's just reminding me the banner was delivered:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

I HAVE NOT HEARD FROM YOU FOR A WHILE NOW. FROM MY TRACKING OF THE FEDEX PARCEL,IT WAS DELIVERED ON THE 15TH OF THIS MONTH ,SHOWING THAT IT GOT TO THE RECIPIENT BEFORE THE 16TH DEADLINE.

PLEASE FATHER,I NEED TO HEAR FROM YOU.

YOURS OBIDIENTLY

BROTHER DONALD

I have replied:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, I passed the tracking number on to the band, I myself did not check the tracking, but I have now been informed, and also by you, that the banner has arrived in the US, sadly, the band have moved to another state in the US due to their tour, so they did not get the banner when it arrived late in Orgeon, it has apparently been forwarded to them from the address you sent it to, so they should collect it in the next day or two.

The donations we have now received total �1,004,000, (�1 million and 4 thousand pounds), but the donations have slowed down very dramatically since I last emailed you, and we are desperately looking for new sponsors to try to reach the final total of �1.5 million pounds, we still need another �496,000 to reach that target and it is getting very difficult now, I am sure we will get there in the end, although that may be some time from now unless we can find a very kind sponsor!

Blessings,

Father O'H

He can be guaranteed I will have my new sponsor soon, whether he will fulfil my request is another matter, but as he is in so deep now, who knows Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Got a reply from my lad, seems a bit concerned that the sponsors and donations are drying up, must pray harder:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

OUR KNEES ARE ON THE FLOOR PRAYING THAT GOD SHOULD GRANT YOU ALL SPONSORS NEEDED TO HIT THE TARGET.I PRAY FOR YOU FERVENTLY AND SMARTLY BECAUSE MY INTEREST IS YOUR FUTURE AND WHEN IT IS ACHIEVED,IT WILL PROPELL OURS. (Yeah, propelled backwards Laughing

)

MAY GOD CONTINUE TO WORK THROUGH YOU HIS SON AND SERVANT.

YOURS BROTHERLY IN CHRIST

DONALD

Trophy Videos · Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 2:17 pm

@SP -

Quote:

I PRAY FOR YOU FERVENTLY AND SMARTLY

I don't think he should mention SMARTLY, at this point.
hehehe
I'm on my knees, too, but for a different reason.... bow_down

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

I thought I better send him an email to let him know how the donations are going Twisted Evil

:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, and thank you for your prayers, I wish you would pray harder as the donations have slowed to a near halt now.

When I last mailed you, we had a total of �1,004,000, (�1 million, 4 thousand pounds), since then, we have had only 3 more donations totalling �217

The grand total is now �1,004,217, (�1 million, 4 thousand, 217 pounds), please keep praying hard as me need much bigger donations than the last 3 we have received, we still need �495,783 to reach our final target, and it looks like it is going to be a long hard struggle getting those donations, so pray like you have never prayed before.

Blessings,

Father O'H

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

A reply from my lad, he says it's ok, good things will happen Very Happy

:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

JUST RELAX,AS LONG AS THE GOD WE WORSHIP IS THE GOD OF ABRAHAM,ISAAC AND JACOB. THE SPIRIT OF "" IS NOT SLEEPING. THEY WILL BRING US SPONSORS AND I DECREE THAT AS YOU READ THIS MAIL,BEFORE THE END OS THIS MONTH,SOMETHING MERVELOUS WILL HAPPEN IN JESUS NAME .....AMEN. (he must be reading my mind, something marvellous will happen before the end of the month Laughing

)

REMAIN BLESSED

BROTHER DONALD

Western Union · Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 2:33 am

Moved here at SP's request.

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Cheers mr Fishe Thumbs up

Well it's shit or bust time for this bait, trying to get some photos of my lads holding Shivers book cover, hence the move here in case they Google Shivers name on the book cover and find this topic about them, this is what I just sent to my lad:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

I have just been chatting with a member of the band who you made the banner for, the banner has now arrived at it's destination after being forwarded to them from where you sent it to in Oregon.

Unfortunatley, the banner is in a very bad state and they cannot use it at all, the band member told me that the banner stinks of something like petrol or turpentine, and the paint was still wet when you folded the banner up in the package, as a result, the wet paint has gone all over the banner and it is of no use to them now, they tell me the paint is still sticky after all this time, it has been travelling for 12 days and the paint is still sticky, what in Gods name sort of paint did you use that would still be wet after all this time? And why does the banner stink of petrol or turpentine?

This is a very sad state of affairs I can tell you, I had no choice but to give the band back the �70,000 donation that they paid to my church, and as the banner cannot be used on their album covers, you will now not get any royalties from the sales of the albums and CD's, this is absolutely terrible, Brother Donald!

You know how little the donations we are receiving at the moment, and having to give the �70,000 back has really dented our donations appeal fund, but as you mentioned in your last email, God, the spirit of , Abraham, Isaac and Jacob will bring us sponsors, and I know for sure they are all helping because the good Lord has smiled upon us both on this day, praise the Lord and his great power.

The good Lord has provided us with 2 more people who are willing to pay �250,000 each to my church, and being in Nigeria, you are in an ideal position to help us to get one of those �250,000 donations.

There is an author in the UK who is writing a book about scammers in Africa, now I have been to Africa many times over the years, and I know all about 419 scams, I am sure that as you live in Nigeria, you have heard about these 419 scammers, these people use internet cafes to scam people all over the world, and the name 419 actually comes from the Nigerian criminal code that deals with fraud, well something like that anyway.

Well, as I said, this author is writing a book all about African scams, his book is due to be printed in about 2 weeks time and the book will sell millions of copies here in the UK and the rest of the world. He has made a cover for his book, but he wants it to look more realistic, he knows I am in contact with you and that you are Nigerian, so, he will give a �250,000 donation to my church if I can get some Nigerians to hold copies of the front cover of his new book and take a photo of you holding it, he will then use that picture of you holding the book cover for the actual cover when the book is printed, but I would like you to do a bit more than just holding the book so as to make sure we get this donation and give value for his gracious donaton to us.

I am sending you a very large image of the book cover as an attachment in this email, I would like you to have the book cover image printed off as LARGE as you can make it, and I mean make it a very large colour photocopy, it might be best if you take the image to a printers and have it done properly.

You will need about 8 - 10 photocopies of the book cover to hold, I would like you and a large number of your friends and associates to gather together, and do 2 things for me to make this really good for the author, it needs to look like you are authentic Nigerian scammers in an internet cafe, so this is what I would like you to do:

1). Gather all your friends and associates together and have some of them holding copies of the book cover, please be inside an internet cafe when taking the photos to make it look like you are all a bunch of those nasty 419 scammers that we hear so much about, all I need is several photos of you all in the internet cafe holding the book covers, please make sure everyone looks very menacing as I understand scammers are very angry looking people.

2). For the second thing I would like you to do, it would be fantastic if all of your friends could lie on the floor in the shape of alphabet letters so that you spell out the name of the book using people, as you will see from the attached image I have sent you, the book is called:

Please use people to spell those words and have them in a large circle on the ground, with some people in the middle of the circle holding the photocopies of the book cover, obviously, you will need to be upstairs in your house or climb up a high tree to take the photo of them on the floor spelling out the letters, otherwise we will not see clearly that you have spelt all of the words if you stand on the ground to take the photos.

Praise the Lord for bringing these donations to us, and praise be to Brother Donald Pxxxx for all of his fine work in both helping my church, and in helping himself to get his grant and compenstaion for the deceased womans family.

If we get these 2 x �250,000 donations, will will thenhave enough money to start rebuilding my church, and I can them immediately send you your grant and the compensation payment, I forgot to mention, that the author will donate �0.05 to you from the sale of each book that he sells, and the book will sell millions of copies, so whilst �0.05 does not sound a lot, it does become a lot when you multiply it by 5 million book sales!!!

Please get back to me about this as soon as possble to let me know your progress.

Blessings,

Father O'H

Wonder if he will go for that, well he does want his money and he's in deep now, plus he messed up the banner, so he can redeem himself with this Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

My lad seems a bit peeved about the banner and my requests:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER O'H,

TO START WITH,REMEMBER THAT I WAS TOO RELUCTANT TO DO THAT BANNER. TO BE FRANK WITH YOU,I DID THAT BANNER ON FRIDAY BEING 8TH OF SEPTEMBER 2006,I COULDN'T SEND IT THE FOLLOWING DAY BEING SATURDAY 9TH BECAUSE FEDEX OR UPS DO NOT WORK ON SATURDAYS HERE IN NIGERIA.SO I SPREAD THE BANNER OUT UNDER THE SUN TILL SUNDAY EVENING.I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO TAKE PICTURES WITH IT UNTIL THAT SUNDAY WHEN IT GOT DRY.

THE CAUSE OF THE SMELL IS WHAT WE CALL "THINNER" WHICH HELPS IT TO GET DRY.THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THE BANNERS,UNLESS SOMEBODY IS TRYING TO SABOTAGE MY EFFORTS IN ORDER TO HOLD MY GRANT AS WELL AS THE DEAD WOMAN'S COMPENSATION.

I SUGGEST THEY RETURN THE BANNER BACK TO ME BEFORE I BELIEVE THAT CRAP.

AS TO WHAT YOU ARE ASKING ME TO DO AS REGARDS THE BOOK "SCAMBAITERS LETTERS",I LOVE SUCH DEVELOPMENT,IT WILL HELP CREATE AWARENESS ON THE ISSUE OF 419. IT IS A HOUSE HOLD ACTIVITY HERE IN NIGERIA,I EVEN HAVE IN MIND THAT YOU MIGHT EVEN BE SUSPECTING ME TO BE ONE OF THEM BECAUSE I AM A NIGERIAN.

BUT FATHER,I CANNOT DO IT WITHOUT LITTLE FINANCIAL SUPPORT FROM THE AUTHOR. I DO NOT RUN A CAFE AND WOULD HIRE ONE IN THE PROCESS. I NEED ALSO TO RENT SOME PEOPLE TO SPELL SUCH ALPHABETS. MOST OF MY CHURCH MEMBERS ARE NO LONGER WILLING TO INDULGE IN ANY ACTIVITY COMING FROM YOU THROUGH ME BECAUSE OF THE LONG AWAITED PROMISES. THEY ARE EVEN USING THE ABANDONED CHICKEN DEATH OF THE SISTER AS AN EXAMPLE.

SO FATHER,WITH 100 POUNDS ,I CAN DO THAT WHICH WILL FETCH YOU 250,000 POUNDS IN RETURN.EVEN IF IT MEANS SUBTRACTING IT FROM MY GRANT.

BEST REGARDS

BROTHER DONALD

I obviously can't send the banner back as it was thrown in the bin due to it being ruined and stinking of thinners, can't give him �100 either as we can't give out any money until we reach our target, I might lose this lad, will reply to him in a bit explaining that all cost are met by the grantee blah blah blah, and if he doesn't want to do it, feel free to cancel your grant and compensation payments.

If he does drop me, I can always hook up with him again in a few weeks and tell him we have reached our church restoration target and can now give him his money, sadly, I will be in Chad at that time and he has to collect it from me if he wants it blah blah blah.

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 11:10 am

Surely that has to be a classic

Quote:

THEY ARE EVEN USING THE ABANDONED CHICKEN DEATH OF THE SISTER AS AN EXAMPLE.

So have you persuaded them to take photos of the book cover?

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

^^^^^ I am trying to persuade him to do that, but I get the impression he wont unless I send him noney first Evil or Very Mad

, I have replied to him:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, firstly, NEVER, I repeat, NEVER use the word CR*P when emailing me, is that clear, if you use such words in any further emails to me, I will simply delete your grant application and compensation payments permanently. I will not tolerate bad language, and NEVER accuse me of sabotaging your efforts, I am a priest, a man of the church, do you honestly think I sabotage people? My only concern is helping people and getting people such as you to help yourself.

With regards to the banner, you say it was dry, the band members tell me it was still sticky and the paint was on other parts of the banner, I myself have had banners from Nigeria that were still sticky when they arrived in the UK, despite the sender saying they were dry when they sent them, and the smell of the thinners is horrible, the smell alone makes the banners unuseable, there is no need whatsoever to mix thinners with the paint when making a banner, are you aware that when you put thinners in paint, and then use that paint on a banners and parcel it up, the humidity in the parcel caused by the thinners causes the paint to become sticky? Well that is exactly what happens, so please do not use thinner when you make banners!

The banner you made had to be thrown out with the rubbish, partly due to the sticky paint getting on other parts of the banner, but mostly due to the overwhelming smell of thinners coming from it, they could not keep it and so it was thrown away as unuseable.

You mention that you want �100, well, as I have told you on more than one occasion, church funds are tied up due to the fire, no money is allowed to be sent to anyone until we reach our �1.5 million pound target, there are no exceptions to that rule! The onus is on grantees to fund any tasks for sponsors, of course, you can claim back any expenses once your grant is payable.

Brother Donald, you saying that I might think you are a scammer is ridiculous, if I thought you were one of those 419 scammers, I would not even bother emailing you, I would have known from the start that you were a scammer and I would have called you a scammer, by doing the things I ask of you, it proves to me that you are not a scammer, scammers are only interested in getting money, they would not bother spending money and completing sponsor tasks as you have done, so please, let there be no more talk of you being a scammer because I know you are completely genuine.

On the subject of what I asked you to do in my last email concerning the author, I am not asking you to hire an internet cafe. I have been to Nigeria many times and I know that you can walk in to any internet cafe without paying, you only have to pay for your internet time, and I am not asking you to pay for any internet time, all I am asking is that you simply to go to an internet cafe and have your photos taken in there whilst holding the photocopies of the authors book cover, there are no costs to you involved in that apart from making colour photocopies of the book cover.

As for having to hire people to do the alphabet, if you feel that is too difficult for you, then just go ahead and do the part in the internet cafe, which is well within your means and will cost virtually nothing apart from your time, please ensure that the photocopies of the book cover are as big as possible, for example, photocopies of A4 size "ARE NOT" big enough, they need to be much bigger than that so that the cover is clearly visible.

If you feel that you do not wish to help yourself and my church by getting this very important �250,000 donation, then feel free to email me stating that you wish to cancel your grant, and I will delete your grant application and compensation payment.

Blessings,

Father O'H

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

It looks like my mild slap and mentioning about his grant and compensation being cancelled has done the trick, he has agreed to do Shivers book cover task Laughing

:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

I AM VERY,VERY AND VERY SORRY IF THAT WORD "CR*P" OFFENDED YOU,PLEASE FIND A PLACE IN YOUR HEART TO FORGIVE ME.

AS REGARDS THE REJECTED BANNER,FATHER PLEASE REMEMBER THAT I SENT YOU A BANNER WHICH YOU EVEN WROTE ME THAT IT WAS SO FINE,IT WAS AS A RESULT OF THE FIRST ONE THAT PROPELLED MY DOING THE SECOND ONE FOR THE MUSICIANS.

FATHER,PLEASE I WANT TO KNOW IF IT WILL BE LATE BY 2ND OF OCTOBER TO GET THE TASK DONE. WE ARE PRE-OCCUPIED WITH SOME CHURCH ARRANGEMENTS TO MARK NIGERIA'S INDEPENDENCE DAY ON 1ST OCTOBER.

YOURS OBIDIENTLY

BROTHER DONALD

N:B FATHER ,I WOULD LIKE YOU TO UNDERSTAND THAT THERE IS A GREAT DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE QUALITY OF THINGS IN LONDON AND THAT OF NIGERIA. FOR AN INSTANCE,THE PAINT.

I replied:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, your apology over the use of the word "cr*p" is accepted, thank you!

Yes, the first banner you made for my church was very good, but when it arrived the paint was not still sticky and as such, the paint had not spolied the rest of the banner, I can only assume that you use less thinners in that banner because we could not smell the thinners at all, unlike the banner you sent to the band which had an overwhelming smell on it.

As for waiting until October 2nd, that is acceptable in the circumstances due to Nigerian independence day celebrations, I hope you have a great time during that day! But it is imperative that you complete the task with the book cover as soon as independence day celebrations are finished, the sooner it is done, the sooner we will get our �250,000 donation which will bring us closer to our target, and the sooner you will get your grant and compensation payments.

Blessings,

Father O'H

Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 10:08 am

You have him wound around your little finger!

*** BANNED *** Joined: 10 Jan 2004 Posts: 3779

He's become an obedient mugu for life. Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Not heard back from my lad yet, hope he is not having second thoughts, so I mailed to ask how he was getting on with the task:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

I hope you had a great independence day celebration, Nigeria is a wonderful country.

I have not heard from you for a few days, in your last email, you asked if it would be ok to leave the task until the October 1st celebrations were over, well, it is now October 4th and I have not heard back from you regarding completing the task, I trust that everything is in order and you will be sending the photos with the book covers in an internet cafe very soon?

Blessings,

Father O'H

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 8:34 pm

@SP This mugu has spent so much time with you, and is in so deep, I believe his little brain is numb. It's really gonna hit him hard when this one is over. Hopefully, he'll give up scamming after the SP treatment. Smile

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

^^^^^ Time has flown by, this is my 5th month with him now since I got his first email, wonder how much longer Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

My lad has replied, he though I might scold him Laughing

, but he will be doing the book covers:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

THANKS FOR YOUR MAIL. ACTUALLY WHY I HAVEN'T MAILED YOU WAS THAT I AM BEING AFRAID OF YOUR SCOLDING ME. MY REASONS ARE THESE:

[1] I HAVE PRINTED A MASTER COPY OF THE BOOK COVER IN A4 BUT WHEN I GOT TO A PRINTING PRESS TO MAKE AT LEAST TEN LARGE COPIES,THEY CHARGED ME 40,000 NAIRA,BECAUSE THEY CHARGE THE SAME FOR 1000 COPIES. IT IS SAME PRICE WHETHER 1000 COPIES OR TWO COPIES.

[2] MOST TIMES WHEN I GIVE YOU EXCUSES LIKE THIS,YOU USUALLY COMPARE LONDON[UK] TO NIGERIA.THINGS AREN'T THESAME HERE. 40,000 NAIRA IS ABOUT 166.7 POUND STERLING.

BUT FATHER,PLEASE IF YOU CAN ALLOW ME DO IT WITH THE A4 PAPER,THEN I CAN MAKE SURE IT GETS THROUGH IMMEDIATELY AS WELL AS MAKING SURE THE POSTERS APPEAR CLEARLY. THIS IS MY PROBLEM FOR NOW.

LEST I FORGET,I ALSO NEGOTIATED FOR AN A3 TYPE AND THAT WILL COST LESS THAN THE 40,000 NAIRA. THEY CHARGED 15,000 BUT IT WILL BE ONLY TEN COPIES. (that will cost him �63, not including the A4 copies Laughing

)

THIS IS THE SITUATION REPORT,PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ON THIS AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

YOUR BROTHER IN CHRIST

DONALD

I have replied to him with:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, it is lovely to hear from you again, please don't worry about me scolding you, I am not that bad am I?

I can see you are having some problems making very large images due to the costs, so I have asked the author about it, and he says as long as you can get 10 copies in the cheaper A3 sizes that you negotiated, and as many of the normal A4 size photocopies as possible, then that will be totally acceptable for his needs.

I look forward to receiving the photos from you as soon as possible.

Blessings,

Father O'H

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

He has replied already:

Quote:

DEAR FATHER,

THANK U SO MUCH,I WILL DO THAT DESPITE MY LIMITED RESOURCES.

BUT PLEASE FATHER, I BEG YOU TO COVER ME FROM INCURING OTHER COMMITMENTS BECAUSE OF MY MEAGRE FINANCES. (don't worry, you're covered, apart from some expenses you might incur travelling to Chad Laughing

)

I HAVE A SICK MOTHER THAT MILKS ME DRY OF MEDICAL BILLS. PLEASE HELP ME. (a sick mother huh, think of something original will ya Rolling Eyes

)

ALSO AS SOON AS WE GET OUR GRANT AND CONCLUDE THE CRUSADE WE PLANNED EARLIER,I WOULD BEG YOUR CHURCH TO GRANT ME A PERSONAL LOAN OF ABOUT 400 POUNDS TO ENABLE ME REINOVATE MY OLD MOTHER'S LEAKY ROOF. (I wouldn't worry about her roof, she will be dead before you get any money from me Laughing

)

YOURS OBIDIENTLY

BROTHER DONALD

I replied:

Quote:

Dear Brother Donald Pxxxx,

Thank you for your email, it goes without saying, that one we have concluded everything, I would be only to happy to make a grant to repair your mother's leaky roof.

I can pretty much assure you that there will be no further financial commitments required from you, but I do have a personal favour to ask of you, a very dear friend of mine in the church has just made his 9000th post to missions around the world, they have mainly been in Africa, but he is currently at a mission in India, and he misses Africa a lot, so whilst you are taking the photos of the book covers, could you please take just one photo, with you all holding a simple sign written on a piece of card or something similar, and written in black felt tip pen, please use these words on the sign:

That will cheer my friend up immensely knowing people in Africa are wishing him well, thank you for your help Brother Donald!

Blessings,

Father O'H

Posted: Thu Oct 05, 2006 6:55 pm

Posted: Thu Oct 05, 2006 6:57 pm

He better hurry up. Did you tell him that you will be needing that by tomorrow?

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

^^^^^ Nah, I'm trying to post sparingly, which is difficult as I have been drinking today Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 4:42 am

SP@ All I can think of to say right now is, "Oh, my!"

EDIT: If you get the covers AND the sign, I'm gonna cry laughing to death!
LMFAO

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

My lad has replied, the lads were all afraid of the book title Laughing

:

Quote:

FATHER,

WE FOUND IT DIFFICULT TO GET A CAFE,THEY WERE ALL AFRAID CONSIDERING THE WRITE-UP [] .NIGERIA IS FULL OF 419ERS

BROTHER DONALD

Didn't send me my 9000th post photo though, I must have words about that Mad

Posted: Sat Oct 07, 2006 11:55 am

Scam Patroller wrote:

My lad has replied, the lads were all afraid of the book title Laughing

:

Is there any possibility of those lads getting T-Shirts silk screened with that particular graphic? Methinks they would look so cool in them Exclamation

And have a few FedExed over for yourself? One for Shiver too?

Just a thought.....

7/9

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