Fred's 3000 mile safari - Jacob's Revenge! :o)

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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 12:40 pm

@Amba_Gambla
These guys are the total bomb aren't they?

I wanna be just like them when I grow up.

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 1:19 pm

You are welcome to join in.

Send an email to Jacob saying that you're a reporter and have heard... blah, blah, blah.

However, NEVER mention that you know that he is in Ghana, and NEVER suggest any names for the celebrity. Oh, and don't say you know George either! Very Happy

Not quite a Newb Joined: 02 Nov 2005 Posts: 28

I've read and enjoyed this topic for a long time... and decided to help Jacob with more safari events!

Quote:

I'm from company Travel to Be Free - we helping people to travel over the world easier with our sponsorship program. I've received e-mail from reporter's associasion in USA asking us to help some reporter Jacob who has difficulties. Our board members got interested in this case as we never got request from so much people about help to one person. As I understood they wanted to help you with traveling issues but we were not supplied with any details. If you are interested I could give you more details. I am looking forward to it!

Let's see if he wants to travel Twisted Evil

Master Baiter Joined: 02 Nov 2005 Posts: 126 Location: UK

heh heh heh Twisted Evil

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:28 pm

Just don't send him home. Make him believe Sudan is a nice place. Smile

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:35 pm

But Sudan *IS* a nice place. For a mugu, anyway! Very Happy

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:42 pm

@Shrek
Thanks Shrek but I'm still pushin for the Kallon behind door number 1 to explode any time now. It'll be messy and I want to make sure to get good seats for the show.

Then again, PNA might just pick up on this... Hmmmm
DAH! The people have right to know.
... and unless they read Russian/Cyrillic any posting on the RAIS site will serve as proof.

Why Pravda picked up a story my own character insists was leaked by James' bank manager... and after James spoke so highly of him too.

Tanya Hyde of Russian News and Information Services must know true facts of this scandel. Perhaps if he tells me where he is, I could fly there to meet him for drinks and maybe sex....

and after he tells me where to meet him I can send him a picture of Godzilla in a unitard, with a single eyebrow and legs that rightly belong on a grand piano.

puke

?

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:41 pm

So is he still in Ghana then? If so, how long has it been now? Because thats pretty amazing!

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 6:04 pm

Oh, not long. Just over a month. But I'm damned if I can figure a way to get him tattoo-ed...

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 6:28 pm

Last I heard from him he was still in Ghana, and that was last week. I sort of let him drop, since I had to berate my current favorite extensively (he refused to fill out some forms). Should I contact him again an mention that I'm hearing the same story from other sources, and that his price is falling?

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 8:07 pm

Whatever you like. It's all up to the rest of you. It's open house time on Jacob from now on.

Basically, Fred and I are going to let you boys loose on this lad. Let's see how long you can all:

(a) keep him away from home, and/or
(b) make him go on more safaris! Very Happy

We all know what he is capable of, with the right suggestions!

Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 3:28 am

Quote:

But I'm damned if I can figure a way to get him tattoo-ed

This is because female you are not being...

Tanya knows these things...

Nothing make Tanya hot and like tattoo.

I can waiting no longer, Tonight the Truth Must be Knowing.

I hope Moskva Airport not too snowed in. I must board my plane in the morning so that tomorrow I can ride my hot African Stallion.

Tanya Hyde will getting some tomorrow... I hope he is tattoo from head to toes. Dah! the people have right to know.

Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 7:54 pm

Sent him this a couple of days ago ...

Quote:

I've only just been able to get to my e-mails after being in Ghana for a
few days filming.

Whenever I heard it was ****** **** I called a good source within BMG to
find out whether the story was good or not. My source, who has never let
me down before hesitated and asked to call me back. I sensed that this
was nothing other than stalling and that you may well be on to a big
story here. I got a call back from one of their legal people - I didn't
catch his name and he refused to repeat it; suggesting that I "back
away" from the story, and if I did there would be a reward. A sizable
reward.

Later on I got a call from our managing director suggesting that this
story wasn't going anywhere. This stinks. However, I can't do anything
about it just now. Stella productions is �75K richer but I feel really
low. Don't give up the fight. I will see what I can do in the future if
you still want to air the story - these corporate lawyers can't be
allowed to gag the free press.

Sorry.

Vera

His reply, from Ghana (Oh bother, I had just been there filming as well):

Quote:

good for you, I am happy really at least you would leave me alone. the story will be publish when I am ready ok and they would not even know it.
or maybe I would use it to launch my private website then you can subscribe for free.

let me give another good suggestion. why not ask maybe 5 or more colleagues of yours to contact me and then contact BMG afterwards to inform them they are on my story.
that way BMG would pay each of them $75k to back off and you can even get a commission out of the settlements from your colleagues. what do you say.

or still you can get the story and bargain for more. think of it, if BMG could pay you $75k for a story you don't even have how much do you think the would pay you if you have the story?
who is fooling who? if I believe you I would believe anything.

I think this is a good suggestion. Would 5 of you like to contact our Jacob about the story? Tell him Vera sent you. I want a commission mind ...

Not quite a Newb Joined: 22 Sep 2005 Posts: 46

I am beginning to think this dude is based in Ghana. He has been away from home for so long. By now you will think he would have ran out of money. His style of writing is also very west african.

Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 9:27 pm

He may have friends in Ghana or Liberia - not sure. I do know he started off in SA and was there for a long while.

He has taken the bait on the "Big Mama" story - i.e dishing the dirt on my previous character George. I quote (i've chopped it - cos he does go on a bit)

Quote:

Robbie,
I have been thinking of your explanation about leaking George story and it makes some sense.
�
as I already said I am more than willing to work with you on that regard ok.
just tell me your plans and I shall go along with you to leak the story. if you want me to start dropping the hints I shall do that but I need to see some evidence in that regard.
�
now do we have a deal or not? if you insist on my meeting you in Liberia, you would have to send me some cash here in advance to enable me make the trip. from Ghana to Liberia is about 3 days trip by road as there is no connecting flight from Ghana.
so let me know quickly where we stand ok.

yes - you heard right - he's on for a 3 day road trip AND he wants me to send him horrible Big Mama pr0n as evidence. This must be a first - the lad actually wants me to send him Pr0n[/quote]

Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 10:10 pm

"Oops, oh dear. Sorry, hit the wrong button and sent the cash to Liberia instead." - Fred's next email.

Then he'll just have to go and get it won't he... Twisted Evil

Master Baiter Joined: 02 Nov 2005 Posts: 126 Location: UK

I've made him a very generous offer for this story I have heard about - I work for one of the largest news agencies in the Uk, if not the world.

Surely he can't turn down my offer Very Happy

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 7:55 am

Tanya finally got a brief note off to him.
Being half Russian and Half Germany, she is always late...
But she is late on a precise time schedule.

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 10:30 am

The reply he sent me:

Quote:

I have not sold the story so just give me your phone number and I shall call to discuss on phone ok.

Not sold the story? Is this true?

Not quite a Newb Joined: 02 Nov 2005 Posts: 28

Jacob doesn't want to travel for free Mad

what the hell is happening with him? Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 5:21 pm

So after waiting 4 days for Arven to get a visa, I have to mail him the bad news. Maybe this'll give him incentive to either move for me or someone else:

Quote:

I was afraid of this, which is why I wanted to talk to you somewhere other than Ghana. I worked security with Hilla Limann and I'd hoped with Rawlings no longer there I could get a visa. Apparently resentment runs deep in Ghana's government. I'm still persona non grata because I guess they think I'm going to somehow create a coup all by myself.
So if you can go somewhere else or have any other ideas give me a shout. Otherwise good luck selling your story. Word's out that this is hot enough that they're paying off all the little guys. They can't touch Le Monde, so let me know if you still want to play.
Just make sure it's soon, pretty soon the cat'll be out of the bag and you won't have anything worth sh*t.

Google is my friend. Names came from googling "Ghana History"

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 5:26 pm

Hitchike Baby! (& send us emails en route)

We could offer to drop him off from one of my Church's regular slave freighters to Istanbul, they pick up in Accra and Monrovia. Good story for him to sell...

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 7:08 pm

This mugu definitely is getting testy. I messed with him some more and sent him the following message

Quote:

Hello Jacob,

I just wanted to update you on a few developments:

1. Word from my sources at Entertainment magazine say they
are very close to breaking a story that sounds similar to
the one you claim that you have.

2. BMG still hasn't paid up. I was promised $50,000 by the
end of this week. Are you interested in working together if
they do not come through?

3. Even if you do not wish to sell me the story, it is
obvious that you are in need of a good editor. May I offer
my services, free of charge? With all due respect, your
grammar is subpar by elementary school standards, let alone
those which are adhered to by professional journalists. You
simply can't end every sentence with "ok" like some kind of
jibbering fool. Join me and we'll break this story together.

Please respond soon. As you know, time is money in the news
business.

Sincerely,

Richard Weed

His response proves that he is in fact in dire need of an editor:

Quote:

You know what I said?
I said kiss my ass cork sucker

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 7:43 pm

Quote:

You know what I said?
I said kiss my ass cork sucker

lmaorofl (or whatever you young people say these days)

Thats dangerous, you could get your ass corked!

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 01 Dec 2005 Posts: 1

This is one of the funniest things I have ever read on the internet. And I have been reading many, many things on the internet.

Poor Jacob. Poor, poor, Jacob.

Appreciatively,

Sam K. Ambator

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