Need your assistance for poor Princess Yaa

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Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2005 Posts: 60

Quote:

Dear Sir, Carlo Roitemann,
thanks God bless you and your family I am happy to receive such nice mail from you that show that you are Godly person,
infact sir I will like to help to retrive this fund out from here in benin Cotonou and i will like you to come and visit me here in benin cotonou and i want to have your private phone and your fax also you home address, with your international Passport,

please let this transaction between me and you and God in heaven also i will like to find out the nice business we will use this money to do in your country after this money retrive from here in africa as you know I will like to forward my education in your country as i am a little girl of 18years,

thanks this is my telephone number;00229-889-716xxx,

waiting to hear from you,
yours sincerely sister Princess yaa, our truth shall set us free In Jesus name AMEN,

I am a noob of all noobs here, and your comments will be much appreciated regarding in how to assist princess Yaa

Time to go and get a phone card I guess ...

By the way, I am posing as a wealthy religious landowner. It is a given that in order to send some assistance I will have to tell my elders about the new prospective member ...

The usual 400 question form and all the goodies will be demanded.

Any original ideas?

Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2005 8:24 am

I'd say that, under the circumstances, a section on sexual history would be appropriate. e.g.

How many sex partners have you had in the last year?
How many sex partners have you had in the last week?
How many sex partners have you had at once? _______ Give details. [Be sure to leave plenty of room.] Continue on a separate piece of paper if necessary.
STDs? (include current and cured)
Would you sleep with a wealthy religious landowner for free?
If not, how much money would you need to change your mind?
How long have you worked as a prostitute? Will you continue to do so in America?
How much do you charge?

Also a special form for royalty is called for, I think...
Connections, relationship to other royal families (Windsors, Romanovs, etc). In fact, full genealogy going back at least 4 generations, including *all* illegitimate, insane, and inbred relatives). Willingness to undertake royal assignments (opening of shopping malls, putting down of revolutions, etc) in the USA.

Naturally, all pages will need to be officially stamped and witnessed.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2005 Posts: 60

This is the lame reply i got after asking about her religion - obviously that is a lad .... The lack of upper case is a dead givaway that this one is not a total noob ....

Quote:

Dear sir,
thanks for your mail bear in mind that I am not joking i am tell you real,
think so if you can help me please help me I am a christian catholic,
in benin here ok, if you can help forward all the info I am demand from you,
thanks,
princess yaa

This will be my response

Quote:

"My dear princess: I ache to read such poor grammar and punctuation ... you must be in real distress since your english was much better before ...
Are you Catholic as catholic from Rome? ....
If so you need to contact me as soon as possible
You phone seems to be out of service, but feel free to call mine ...

Dr Roitmann
Holy Be The Cow

Of course ... I got the stanaphone thing that lets me recieve calls for free ..

I understand that is very expensive to call to NY from Benin.

Lets see how it goes ....

419Eater is my life Joined: 11 Jun 2005 Posts: 344

Here's a whole slew of questions i wrote up for a questionnaire i've been working on. (has Yes/No after each question) Feel free to use all or part of them.

da

Spirituality Questionnaire
Please answer every question honestly � remember there are no wrong answers!

Do you believe in God?
Do you believe in multiple Gods?
Do you believe in a female Goddess, rather than a male God?
Do you try to be in tune with the natural world as much as you can?
Do you believe that sex is the woman�s right, and not the man�s?
Do you believe that there is only one God, and that He is not Jesus?
Do you think that it is sometimes hard to decide what the truth is?
Do you believe that both people and animals are reincarnated?
Do you believe that both people and animals go to Heaven?
Do you believe in Heaven?
Do you believe in Hell?
Do you believe in Satan?
Do you believe that both people and animals can go to Hell?
Do you believe that abortion is murder?
Do you believe that you can find peace and self-control through meditation?
Do you ever mediate?
Do you believe that everyone should love one another?
Do you believe that it is okay to have sexual relations with the opposite gender without being married to him/her?
Do you believe that it is okay to have sexual relations with the same gender?
Have you ever committed adultery?
Have you ever had sexual relations with the same gender?
Have you ever been naked in front of someone other than your spouse?
Have you ever been sexually aroused by someone other than your spouse?
Have you ever been sexually aroused by someone of the same gender?
Do you believe that a man can love another man?
Do you believe a woman can love another woman?
Do you believe that it is okay for an adult to have sexual relations with a teenager?
Can you be (or have you been) convinced to believe in God without physical proof?
Do you believe that no higher being than man exists?
Do you believe that modest dress should be worn by everyone?
Do you have a strong belief in yourself over anything and everyone in this world?
Do you believe that when you die there is nothing else?
Do you think that one should not follow any rule or commandment without fully believing and understanding it?
Do you think you should be able to do anything you enjoy without limitation?
Do you believe that evil exists?
Do you believe that some people are born evil?
Do you believe that God�s existence can be proven?
Have you ever intentionally physically harmed other living things?
Have you ever intentionally mentally harmed other living things?
Have you ever stolen anything from anyone?
Have you ever lied to someone?
Do you believe that it is sometimes okay to lie?
Have you ever taken God�s name in vain?
Do you believe that God does not ever have a physical body or human form?
Do you believe that life is a struggle in which we must overcome suffering?
Do you believe that religion is na�ve and misinformed?
Do you believe that Jesus is God?
Do you believe that there is no such thing as a �just� war?
Do you believe that there is no such thing as a good reason to lie, cheat, or steal?
Do you believe that God is manifested in the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost?
Do you believe that there should be no images, statues, etc. of God or his messengers?
Do you believe that all adults should pray daily?
Do you pray daily?
Do you believe that there is a Universal Soul?
Do you believe that all life as we know it was created through a random process?
Do you believe that a person�s true nature is similar to that of an animal�s?
Do you believe that the world would be so much better if there were no religions?
Do you believe that men were created for God and women were created for men?
Do you believe that you are the only one who should set rules or restrictions for yourself?
Do you believe that men and women are created equal in the eyes of God?
Do you believe that people and animals are created equal in the eyes of God?
Do you believe in reincarnation?
Do you believe in a set of specific rules on how to live your life?
Do you believe that there should be no moral restrictions on diet or sexual activity whatsoever?
Do you believe that everyone is responsible for his or her own good and bad deeds?
Do you believe that the concept of God was created by people?
Do you feel that the strongest spiritual connection you have is when natures?
Do you believe that Jesus was neither God nor a prophet?
Do you believe that eating animals is cruel?
Do you believe that the many Gods are all part of one larger being?
Do you believe that Jesus died for your sins?
Do you believe that it is better to forgive your enemy than to seek revenge?
Do you believe that the name of God should be respected and never used lightly?
Do you believe that Jesus, being a prophet, should be respected?
Do you believe that Jesus, being a man, should be worshipped?
Do you believe that the idea of God is purely for comfort?
Do you believe that all living things have a soul?
Do you believe that Religious Dogma and Scientific Empiricism are both steps in the wrong direction?
Do you believe that science can answer all questions?
Do you believe that there is a spiritual side to being human?
Do you believe that our modern society has been plagued by an absence of emotion?
Do you believe that in order to progress, we must look to the past?
Do you believe that the majority of scripture should be taken literally?
Do you believe that morals are socially constructed?
Do you believe that spirituality hinders the progress of society?
Do you believe that science has destroyed or at least lessened the original purpose of life?
Do you believe that scripture should, at times, be open to symbolic interpretation?
Do you believe that anything can be reduced to simple, understandable components?
Do you believe that life has been a self-alienation of the divine and that we�re moving closer to realizing our true nature?
Do you believe that life is simply a complex arrangement of physical particles?
Do you believe that the world was a more ideal place years ago?
Do you believe that all that exists is matter and energy?
Do you believe that a person�s ethical nature is pre-programmed?
Do you believe that in the end there will be a oneness of all things?
Do you believe that mankind has no outside control?
Do you believe that the potential of the divine is within each and every living creature?
Do you believe that interpretation is an intrinsic feature of the fabric of the universe?
Do you believe that evolution is taking up closer to the spiritual realm?
Do you believe that everything is rational if given the right amount of effort?
Do you believe that religions have lost their focus and should return to their founding principles?
Do you believe that life includes and transcends fundamental physical particles?
Do you believe that there is no absolute truth?
Do you believe that language itself must be put under a critical eye?
Do you believe that it is humanity�s responsibility to progress?
Do you believe that Heaven�s Gate and Watergate are related?
Do you believe that most things in life can be looked at as �all good� or �all bad�?
Have you ever cursed when praying?
Have you ever done anything for the altruistic value?
Have you ever done something simply for the praise?
Have you ever been mean or cruel to someone without any specific reason?
Do you believe that wanting money is a sin?
Do you believe that gambling is a sin?
Do you believe that society should be ruled solely by God�s laws?
Do you believe that society should focus on promoting justice?
Have you put serious effort into deciding the meaning and purpose of your life?
Is everything you do solely for your own benefit?
Have you ever returned anything that you stole?
Have you ever admitted to lying?
Is it okay to sometimes use violence against another person?
Do you believe that even if we never find out why we exist, we can give our lives meaning?
Do you put others� needs above your own?
Do you believe that your happiness and success are most important?

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2005 Posts: 60

This will be a wonderfull document once i compile it in a rather large pdf file
some of my own modalities

Do you believe in miracles?
Do you believe in a better world for me an you?
Do you believe in the children of the future?
Do you believe in a pet sementery?
Do you believe that I dont want to live my life again?
Do you believe that somebody put something in my drinnk?
Do you believe in beat up the bat with a baseball bat?

Maybe they may get something if they are a Ramones fan! ... neh ..!

419Eater is my life Joined: 11 Jun 2005 Posts: 344

^^ *chuckle*

@huhenio - if you would like the not yet complete .doc file that this is in, PM me - all it has is those questions in a table, but might save you some time

@frazzle - i like your idea of a special form for royalty Smile

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2005 Posts: 60

I got it covered in a nice Word Document with a lot of colors.

The time will come to print them , and that will cost the printer some ink.

More time . hehehehe

419Eater is my life Joined: 11 Jun 2005 Posts: 344

excellent!! *evil laf!*

will have to remember that for myself! and of course the bloated pdf to go with Smile

419Eater is my life Joined: 11 Jun 2005 Posts: 344

here's a few more from another online quiz - just need to reword them into the form of a question

The government is a threat to my freedom
Spirituality is way more profound than religion
I like to be on the cutting edge
"To each his own" reflects how I feel about the faith of others
I dislike authority and don't think anyone should tell me what to do
Secrets make me feel included
Being part of a Movement appeals to me
Tradition is an important part of my life
I am on my own journey
I am sick of all these new-agey BS teachings
It's not just about me
"Old" things appeal to me
There is only ONE truth
I like to study the history of religions
There's nothing wrong with doing what's right for me
I like balance and being comfortable
I feel bad for poor people but they do not really concern me right now
I believe the bible is best interpreted with the heart
I believe in angels
My parents taught me what to believe and they were generally right
I will do my best to make sure my children have a solid foundation of faith
I understand why obedience is a virtue
I try to be a good person but I also do what works best for me
One of these things is very important to me: money, power, fame
There is no way to really know the truth
I am going to or would vote for Kerry
I want to go to heaven
I am very protective of my friends even when they have done something wrong
Jesus was just a man
I wear a lot of black

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2005 Posts: 60

I have a bunch of PDF from the University that I can play with to make a very credible doctoral work .... for your average mugu ...

Specially those with statistics - they dont have to mean anything nor to be related with the text - and a fine 5 megabite file will be in order.

Another thing I have is automotive repair manuals in pdf .... maybe I will interest them into tinkering with cars instead ....

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