Angelique and Alex go beamer shopping II Return of the Mike!

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Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2005 1:05 am

Well I've been looking to trade up for a while and thanks to EK and her Buffalo BMW company shuttle, a handy BMW salesman contacts me about a possible new car.

Quote:

Dear Buyer,
please we will like to know the actual BMW
model you are looking for in other to meet your
choice.
Meanwhile we attach below pictures of some of our BMW
for sale, so if you do like any of them please do let
us know so that we can talk about the price.
Mr Mike...

Mr Mike also sends a whole heap of pictures that don't work. Onya Mr Mike. Not being able to see shit, Alex and Angelique decide to leave it up to Mr Mike to choose for us. Given that he's a technically wiz with pictures, we're sure he can choose the car that's right for us.

Quote:

Well they all look so fast and sexy! Which of them would you
reccomend? I want something that looks sharp and runs like a dream.
Can you help me out?

Regards
-Angelique

Mr Mike finds us an x5. Not exactly what I was after but it'll do for this bait. He informs me that he has one left...

Quote:

Dear Andgelique,
I think that our exclusive BMW X5 3.1 AWD will
suite your taste it has all you need in a car,the
price is also as low as $35,000 USD.It is the only one
of its kind left for now in our shop.
If you need the car please let us know so that we will
discuss about it.
Mr Mike .

Oooh, exclusive! At this point Alex who enjoys creating fake car parts in his spare time decides to rebuild his new car to his specifications.

Quote:

Does it come with big rims and leather trim? I also need mine
supercharged with a Garret 357 Turbo huffer - are you able to do that?

Please let me know
-Alex

Apparently fitting parts I made up to a car that doesn't exist is no problem for Mr Mike. What a guy!

Quote:

Dear Alex Clay,
The interior of the car is execellent , i have attachedeed the pictures of the rims and other parts of the car so that you see for your self, rim is over 18 inch,and i has a leather trim.And also we can fix the superchaged Garret 357 Turbo huffer if you are ready to buy the car.
WE NEED YOUR REPLY .
Mr Mkie

Mike obviously googles up as many x5 bmw pics as he can. I smell a sale coming up....but wait, Alex realises that his choice of Turbo might not be a good idea and makes a few changes. He's also curious about more made up shit on this new ride of his.

Quote:

Mike,

I just realised that the 357 Turbo produces too much low down torque
at high revs, that's something that I'll need to change. I have a few
more questions about the car if you could please indulge me?

Since the 357 turbo is out of the question, are you able to fit in a
German Gerbalhump Turbo instead? I know there might not be much room
next to the flux capictor, but let me know how you go.

Is it running a 12a or 13b rotary engine?

How much horseass power does it produce?

What's the dynamic poon tang factor on this ride?

Please let me know, I'm very interested in buying this car from you.

Thank you.
-Angelique and Alex

Hmmm, I wonder what obscure colour I can get him to spray it in before I decide to change something else on my new beamer Very Happy

_________________
Terrorism insurance Forum

Posted: Thu Mar 03, 2005 11:51 pm

No problem fitting the Gerbalhump turbo which is a releif, there ain't no power like a Gerbalhump Twisted Evil

Quote:

You have no problem about the 357 Turbo ,since we have
not yet fixed it is still easy for us to divert to
your German Gerbalhump Turbo which we are3 going to
fix in for youn right away.
The other features of the car a include:
Power Seat Package, Premium Package, Alloy Wheels,
Xenon Headlamps, Isofix attachments for attachment of
child restraint seats, Xenon headlights w/dynamic
auto-leveling, Alarm system w/interior motion
detector, xDrive fulltime all-wheel drive system,
Interlocking door anchoring system for side impacts,
Rear window defroster, Front seat side impact airbags,
Courtesy lights, Liquid-cooled alternator, Dual
front/rear cup holders, Instrumentation-inc: electric
analog speedometer & tachometer, service interval
indicator, check control vehicle monitor w/pictogram
display, 4-function onboard computer w/exterior temp
display, Pwr heated mirrors w/reverse gear activated
passenger mirror auto-tilt-down, Split-folding rear
seats-inc fold up center armrest,
Engine-speed-sensitive pwr rack & pinion steering,
4-wheel anti-lock brakes, 4.4L DOHC 32-valve V8 engine
w/variable valve timing, Auto climate control-inc:
separate driver/passenger temp settings, auto
recirculation control, rear climate controls,
Universal garage door opener, BMW ambiance lighting,
Coinholder, Battery safety terminal, Dual illuminated
visor vanity mirrors, Remote keyless entry-inc: remote
tailgate/window opening, 2-step unlocking, 6-speed
automatic transmission w/OD-inc: adaptive transmission
control, Steptronic gear selection, sport/manual mode,
Auto fuel-pump shutoff upon severe accident impact,
Driver & front passenger airbag supplemental restraint
system (SRS) w/2-stage smart airbags, Coded driveaway
protection (prevents engine from starting without
proper key), Acoustically decoupled final drive
w/hydraulic rear mount, Leather-wrapped pwr
tilt/telescopic steering wheel w/cruise/audio
controls, Vehicle & key memory, Double-pivot
strut-type front suspension, Pre-wiring for CD
changer, Auto-locking retractors (ALR) on all
passenger safety belts, Front twin-tube gas pressure
shock absorbers, Front reading.
I hope it suites your taste.
IF YOU WANTS TO BUY THE CAR PLEASE CONTACT US
IMMEDIETELY FOR RESERVATION.
REGERDS.
Mr Mike...

Onya Mr Mike, we're getting closer to a sale now. But there's still things I need to know about my pimp ride.

Quote:

Mike, sounds good. You didn't tell me about the poon tang factor? How
much poon tang could I expect with this Beamer powerplant? Also what
colour does it come in? I'm pretty particular when it comes to colour
choice - if you could let me know that would be great.

Cheers
-Alex and Angelique

Does it come in Mugu Red? Lets find out Very Happy

_________________
grand daddy purple plant

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 3:24 am

Mike's a little confused about how to work out the poon tang factor of my new car, perhaps BMW neglected to put that in the x5 manual.

Quote:

PLEASE EXPLAIN TO US WHAT YOU EXACTLY MEAN BY "POON TANG FACTOR" BECAUSE WE MIGHT KNOW IT BY A DIFFERENT NAME, THIS IS IN OTHER TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION ACCURATELY.
Mike.

Some salesman you are Mr Mike...still, it's time you time you learnt some made up things about the car industry.

Quote:

Mike,
The poon tang factor is the measure of the displacement between the
pistons and the rotors from the chain drive pulley system. My last car
was a Hoover Vaculux which had 0.62 Poon Tang Factor. I am hoping that
this BMW has more poon tang ability, because it's a handy thing to
have when you're driving by yourself and you're crusing in unfamiliar
territory.

Also you didn't mention what colour it is?
-Alex

I sincerely hope it has more Poon Tang Factor than my last ride:

It's a hard act to follow Twisted Evil

_________________
Mercedes W201

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 3:51 am

I hear that Steve Dinan has a Stage III mod kit to bump up the X5's poontang factor by at least 78%! Also, make sure that your X5 was assembled in the North Korea factory since they have had quality control problems in Germany.

I love this bait, since I am a total car freak! Laughing

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 5:13 am

A stage 3 kit hey? I'm sure Mike's got one lying about somewhere, along with a spare Gerbalhump turbo if you need one. He must own BMW, he has everything I've ever created!

He's also quick at car measurements cos he's just discovered that my X5 has a poon tang factor of 1.8! Amazing!

Quote:

Dear Alex,
From the records of this car it does have more displacement rate between its piston and rotors than your former car , the BMW X5 3.1 AWD has displacement rate(poon tang fatcors) of 1.8 and the color is navy blue, so i hope you like it .
Get back at us please.
Mr Mike.

And he was going so well until he mentioned the Navy...

Quote:

Mike,

Thank you for getting back to me promptly and letting me know about
the poon tang factor - 1.8 is a very powerful amount and just what I
was looking for!
Just one thing Mike, I don't like the colour. Blue I don't mind, but
not Navy blue. You see Mike I had a bad experience once in this bar
near my house where a couple of navy officers tried to spike my drink
and take me aboard their Navy frigate for some kinky sex. I managed to
escape but ever since that experience I felt that the Navy is full of
homosexuals and assholes. And I can't have a homosexual car at all
Mike. This is a BMW we're talking my friend, not a Daewoo Asscatcha. I
can't have that Navy homosexual colour on my X5, it simple won't do.
No I need a manly colour, like Blaze Red, Candy Apple Green or Steel
Magnolia. Could you organise to have it resprayed Mike? I really like
the sound of this car and with the Gerbalhump turbo it's going to blow
the shit out of the shitfarm so to speak, but I can't have it in Navy
Blue - that's for fags and I like women. With big breasts. And firm
asses.

If you can do this, you'll make me a very happy customer and I'll
organise payment with you in my next mail.

Regards
-Alex

_________________
Mercedes W125

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 8:33 pm

Just like a good salesman, Mr Mike attempts to keep the customer happy - I wonder if he has any homophobic tendencies himself....

Quote:

Dear Alex,
We are sorry for the color, we never knew that you wouldnt like it,but that is not a problem .We will change the color right away, since you dont like the navy blue we will apply Blaze Red which is one of your choice color, we are at your service.
Pease tell us your location so that we can arrange the shipping of the car to your location.
Thank you for being our costumer.
Mr Mike.

Blaze Red with a Gerbalhump AND a poon tang factor of 1.8? This car is gonna fly! Alex also enjoys the fact that Mike hasn't once tried to look at his ass.

Quote:

Thank you Mike, we knew you could be trusted. The last BMW salesman
didn't like my references to the Navy being full of shirt-lifters and
wouldn't change the colour for me. I'm sure he was trying to check out
my ass once or twice at the time too. I really should have popped the
hood, ripped out the carbon fibre crankshaft and hit him in the wing
nuts with it but anyway.
Mike I live in Alabama, MI where men are men and grabbing ass in the
street is prohibited after 9am. Is delivery going to be a problem?

Let me know Mike, and thanks for the help so far.
-Alex

Next up - Angelique attempts to seduce Mike, Alex won't pay her any attention and spends too much time thinking about the car and not her. Stay tuned... Razz

_________________
Ecstasy Rehab Forum

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 8:52 pm

In all seriousness, do any straight men own a Miata?

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 9:21 pm

Well over here they have the more docile name of MX5 which is a little more manly. Mostly MX5 owners are in advertising and use them for trips to vineyards, but now and then a fully worked version with P Plates (probationary licensce plates - the ones you have to display for 2 years before you get your full license) rolls around. Not sure what they run stock, but there's a nice 200kw version that competes in drags in South Australia.

But Miata is such a piss poor name. Like the Suzuki Cuppacino. Who the hell buys a car named after a coffee? I'd like a Ford Expresso thanks...
_________________
Mercedes Benz Axor

Posted: Mon Mar 07, 2005 10:48 pm

Mike's getting antsy, obviously he hasn't made his sales target this month.

Quote:

Dear Alex you are very welcomed,i think you have made
me know what navy blue realy stands for.
I dont think that delivery will be a problem, you have
to send us a down payment of $5,000 so that when the
car gets to you, you will then pay the remaining
balance which is $32,000.
I well contact our delivery department to book a space
for the car so that it will be delivered to you once
it is ready.
THE METHOD OF PAYMENT IS THROUGH MONEY GRAM(WIRE
TRANSFER), SO THAT THE MONEY CAN GET TO US IN TIME.

Well I was about to send him the 5k really, but then Angelique got a little paranoid about her hubby, so she decided to do some investigating. Can't send the money with all this baggage in the way now can we?

Quote:

Hello Mike,

Thank you for letting us know about the car - I will pass on the good
news to Alex when he returns home tonight.

Mike if you don't mind, can I ask you something? I don't know if I
should be worried or not, but when Alex corresponds with you does he
mention...does he talk about another woman at all? I might be paranoid
and I really don't want to think about it, but it's be on my mind for
a while, I think he might be cheating on me...and when he gets this
car from you, he's going to give it to this 'other woman'. Mike does
he talk about me at all in your emails? I'm really worried here.

Don't worry, I'll make sure he doesn't read anything you send to me,
I'm just really concerned that he's dipping his wick somewhere else...

Thank you for your understanding Mike, I'm sure I have nothing to worry about.
-Angelique

_________________
Law Forum

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 2:51 am

Hijack

Larry Flynt wrote:

In all seriousness, do any straight men own a Miata?

There's a guy here that autocrosses and wins just about everything in his Miata/MX5. The thing has a supercharger on it that sounds like a jet engine when it spools, a suspension from hell, and the manditory roll-cage for the track days.

And here I am in my '87 RX-7, waving as he goes past on track days.

/hijack

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 3:09 am

Rx7 favourtism/

Nothing wrong with an 87 rx7 at all mate, I'm currently trying to find myself an 89 Turbo II in good working order (which hasn't been easy).

An extend port, bigger exhaust and a bigger than stock turbo might help you put that Miata back in it's place. Unless you're running the NA version, then a bridge or monster port should make enough noise to scare the hell out of him Very Happy

/End rx7 favourtism
_________________
Mercedes Benz 200

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 11:14 am

<----- This is what you nead no four wheel rubish Cool

Its true what they say about garges praying on women I got a X5 4.4i, for the some price from mike Surprised

Im sure mike could help you with your 89 Turbo II

Guest

@ DJ tricky.. I am crying here dude.. Smile

I actually just read that entire thing to my partner, and he feels the gerbelhump turbo is just wrong in so many ways.. Smile

I am so glad to see you guys doing such great work with the lads I sent the shuttle to. Brilliant stuff! Well done, dude.. Smile

Cheers,
EK

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 12:53 pm

Found these forms on the UK Driver and Vehicles Licencing Agency website.

http://www.dvla.gov.uk/forms/frms_vehicles.htm

Ive just sent mike the Declaration of Vehicle Newness and Application for certificate of Permanent Export Shocked

These forms are great I could not have wrote better my self
"Mileage recorded on speedometer (must be in miles NOT kilometers)"

EDIT

Ive found another usefull site HM customs and excise

http://www.hmce.gov.uk/channelsPortalWebApp/channelsPortalWebApp.portal?_nfpb=true&_pageLabel=pageLibrary_Home&context=none&columns=1&id=FORMSLIBRARY

And sent mike the

"Importation of a Private Motor Vehicle on Transfer of Residence From Outside EC"

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 7:18 pm

Zed wrote:

Hijack

Larry Flynt wrote:

In all seriousness, do any straight men own a Miata?

There's a guy here that autocrosses and wins just about everything in his Miata/MX5. The thing has a supercharger on it that sounds like a jet engine when it spools, a suspension from hell, and the manditory roll-cage for the track days.

And here I am in my '87 RX-7, waving as he goes past on track days.

/hijack

That sounds like a sweet ride! Personally, I think the Miata/MX5/whatever is a great car (Nardi steering wheel? Suh-weet!). It just seems like there is a certain breed of gentleman who prefers to motor around town in them. Just like most (uh... many) lesbians drive Subarus or Japanese pickups. And nobody under the age of 55 drives a Buick unless its a rental car from the airport. These are just patterns I noticed from my time living in Atlanta which has the highest per capita ratio of pimped out Escalades per square mile. Cool

Back to the bait... I'm loving it!! Laughing

EDIT: A moment of respectful silence please, as my number of posts is now offically 419!!

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 10:12 pm

Well thanks for all the compliments guys and EK, well I couldn't have done this without being a part of your shuttle Smile

As for the gerbalhump turbo, well to anyone without a clue it kinda looks German Very Happy

_________________
Friday Night Lights Forum

Posted: Tue Mar 08, 2005 10:32 pm

Mike's back and the man means business. The X5's been sprayed in Blaze Red, the Gerbalhump's been fitted in and the poon tang factor is off the scale. Still no sign of the money though...

Quote:

Dear,
this issue does not realy relate to us , but i dont think that mike did mention any woman in his mail, he is buying the car for his own use as he told us.
This the much that i know, please try and inform him about the car, we are waiting to hear from him.
Mr Mike.

Hold up Mike, Angelique's suspicions have proved correct!

Quote:

Mike,

I just found a pair of female undergarments in the front of our family
Mitsubishi Shahgon Wagon, and they're not mine!!! What do I do??? How
do I confront him on this?? Should I pour sugar in the Gerbalhump when
the car arrives? Please help me Mike, I'm sooo scared!!!
-Angelique

Mike can rebuild a beamer just they way you want it, but can he play agony aunt? Lets find out Twisted Evil

_________________
Love Discussion

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 1:35 am

Dear Mike, I have a problem. My husband is cheating on me. What should I do?

Quote:

Dear Madam,
Please you have to take things easy , try and enquire who the unergaments belongs to,meanwhile what do you mean by pouring sugar in the Gerbalhump.There is no need for you to panic ok?try and take things easy with your man.Meanwhile did Mr Alex travelled very far?
Mike

Yeah real helpful Mike, thank you. Take it easy? Not a chance. Not this firey little minx anyhow Very Happy

Quote:

Mike,

I'm sooooo angry right now! I can't beleive he's been cheating on me!
We've only been married for 2 years, but how could he do that to me??
The nerve of him, to dip his wick into some slut during the day and
expect me to blow his driveshaft when he comes home!!!
Does he think I'm ugly??? I've attatched a pic of myself, am I ugly to
you Mike? Please tell me honestly.
I feel so used and abused....god, why didn't I see this coming?
I was going to pour sugar into the Gerbalhump so the car brakes down
and leaves him stranded somewhere on the way to the no tell motel that
he's probably banging that ho in. But maybe I'll take pictures of him
fucking this skank and sending it to his boss and parents, that'll fix
him! What do you think Mike, will that help me feel better? Thank you
sooo much for being so understanding....I'm not going to mess with
Alex's life until after he buys the BMW off you, you've been so good
to me it's the least I can do.
God I want to stab him in the crank!
-Angelique

And if you're waiting to see what Angelique looks like, try a pic search on Google for 'Tawnee Stone'. Plenty of pictures to keep the porn using baiters on this site happy Twisted Evil

_________________
Ferrari 625

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 2:07 am

What a man, Mike reckons that even though Angelique is getting cheated on, she should still be faithful....right....

Quote:

Please came down,you see men are like this even though am a man like him i will still have to say what is right , maybe he has offended but please he is still your husband , 2 years of marrieg is still a begining, maybe things will get better when you two spends more time with each other.
Why dont you just wait when he comes maybe he can explain ok?try and talk to him to see if he can change,e believe it will get better if you take things easy.
from your picture you are not bad at all! so i dont see what he is still looking for that you aint gat.you gat it all!
just take it easy ok?

Ooooh, I gat it going on! Very Happy

Good thing he's dropped all mention of the car - can I get him hooked on my ass instead of my money? Very Happy

Quote:

It makes me soo angry that he's got his dipstick in someone elses oil
can! He says he loves me, yet he's doing the matress mambo with this
bit on the side. When we got married he said the he would be mine
forever, but now he's off somewhere with his side intrusion bar up
some bitches tailpipe! I don't know if I can talk to him without
breaking down in tears Mike, I feel like someone has detonated my
pistons. I feel terrible, please tell me what to do, I'm so lost here
Sad

And thank you for your kind words about how I look Mike, that has
cheered me up. I have atttatched a picture of me and my headlights, he
took the picture a few months ago for our pleasure and entertainment
but now because he's lubing someone else up I don't mind you seeing my
rack-n-pistons. Please tell me if my breasts are okay, I really don't
think Alex likes playing with them anymore.... Sad

Thanks again Mike, you're a true gentleman.
-Angelique

Could Mike be falling for me? Lets hope Very Happy

_________________
Bali Forum

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 3:43 am

Mike's back, hornier than ever....

Quote:

Dear, you are pretty , i mean its all over you , every part of your body is beautiful.
your breast will surely attract any young man,quite sexy.
do you use yahoo, maybe you can just come online so that we can chat insteat being lonley thinking over your problems with Alex,you need someone that will take forget the bitterness in you right now.
if you use yahoo ,my yahoo ID is nifracon, you can just send me an insistant message , am online now.
be there..

Hmmm, I think you forgot to tell me about my Blaze Red x5 there Mike. Way to go off on a tangent! You've seen my breasts, now for the rest Very Happy

Quote:

Mike,

I'm not too good with technology, I have no idea even what Alex is
talking about when he uses mechanical terms like going out to blow his
load (whatever that means) so I'm not sure what a yahoo is - it's that
like a rimjob?
Thank you for your kind comments Mike, I do appreciate it. And you're
right, I do get very lonely - like today, Alex just called me to say
that he's going to be in Vegas for the next couple of days to meet
with clients....I don't beleive him, I think he's going to be
bedhopping with that grease rag...but I'm just going to bide my time I
think, I'm going to wait for the best time to strike and then hit him
in the hubcaps as hard as humanly possibly. Just wait, I'm going to
make his life a living hell. I'm still lonely, but at least I have
good people like you Mike to talk to. If you have time, could you tell
me more about yourself? Are you married yourself Mike? Have you been
selling BMW's for a while?

Thank you kind angel
-Angelique

P.s You were so sweet with what you wrote about my sexy body that I've
found another picture that you might enjoy. Alex won't be able to
enjoy it any more, but I hope a naked picture of me will make you
smile. Think of it as a way of saying thank you for everything I've
put you through...

A naked picture of Angelique? There's thousands of them. Like at http://www.hiddenthings.com/Tawnee-Stone/2tawnee1/taw09.html
DEFINATELY NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!!!
I hope Mike enjoys what I've sent him... Twisted Evil

_________________
Ferrari 637

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 4:15 am

While Mike's attempting to bone (er...romance) his wife, Alex is busy boning his (er...meeting with clients). He decides out of courtesy to let Mike know where he is (and so Mike doesn't think that Angelique and Alex are one and the same Twisted Evil

)

Quote:

Hey Mike,

Sorry I didn't get back to you earlier, but I'm actually in New Jersey
meeting with clients over a very important business deal. I should be
back within the week and they we can finallise the transport of the X5
over to me.
I actually saw a Lada Nutclampa that was fitted with a Gerbalhump
turbo pass just before, it was going flat out. I can't wait to see how
the X5 goes with it, being a car with bigger crunks I might have to
bore and stroke the shaft and cup the balls (well the bearings away)
for a smoother release - but that's something I'll look forward to
doing on a rainy weekend when the wife's away hunting rabid snatch.

If there's any probs, just send Angelique an email.

Cheers Mike
-Alex

New Jersey is right next to Las Vegas right? Alex was never good at Geography...or satisfying his wife Twisted Evil

_________________
Protection and indemnity insurance Forum

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 4:39 am

Mike replies and not a mention of any underpants, other women or Alex's wife. Obviously he doesn't want to ruin his chances...

Quote:

Dear Sir,
We have been waiting to hear from you after your demand for our BMW X5 , well the cars has already been reserved for you so that when you return from your joourney we send the car over to you.All you demanded in the car has been put in place, the car in now as you like it.
Please and get in touch with us by weekend so that you can make arrangment.
Have a nice day Sir.
Mr Mike

On ya Mike, lets see if you feel even the slightest bit of guilt for playing behind my back...

Quote:

Mike,

You are a great guy and how done such a terrific job with me since the
begining, accomodating all my requests and modifying my car just the
way I like it. I really look forward to doing business with you when I
get back, you're like the brother I never had.

-Alex

_________________
history of economic recession

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 5:27 am

Right, now that he knows Alex will be out of the picture, Mike attempts to scam money and Angeliques love at the same time...

Quote:

Dear sorry for not replying you right away,this due that i have been i lttle busy.
Am not yet married am justasalesman i have been working with company for a while, and they have givenme the duty to sell five cars to buyers in other to retain my job in thecompany, i have made four sales already and about to make the last one which this one am selling Alex, please dear you have to help me persuadAlex in otherto see that he buys the bmw so that i can reatin my job, please help me ok?
i will appreciate your help help.

I will tell you more about myself ok?
what else do you do , do you only stay at home?
i will like to know you too.
i will appreciate more of your picture.
Mike (and he added a little rose too... how sickening.)

Of course you will appreciate more of my pictures, I sent you one showing you my goods! What guy wouldn't appreciate that?? Lets find out what you look like and while Alex is away, lets get bizzay! Twisted Evil

Quote:

Hi MIke,

Don't worry, I know that Alex is very keen on buying the car off you,
he has been talking about it ever since we contacted you - he keeps
going on and on about how he's going to syphon the python or whatever
car terms he's talking about - sometimes I wish he'd stop talking
about 'Unloading all over the face' and just make love to me, but he
never does Sad

Mike you've seen me naked, am I really that ugly? Please tell me
honestly - I sooo need a man to hold me right now....but I don't want
Alex, he can burn in hell for all I care Sad

I'm a freelance photographer myself Mike, I photograph anything that
people want to pay me for, cars, buildings, weddings, women,
machinery, just about everything. I do a lot of work at home where I
have my own photo lab to develop my pictures. Do you like the pictures
I've sent so far? If possible, can I see a picture of you Mike? Don't
worry, Alex will never find out, he's too busy putting 'air in the
tyres' if you know what I mean.
I'd like to know as much as I can about you Mike, please tell me what
you like doing, what you do in your spare time. You're such a swete
guy.

And thank you for the rose, that was really sweet xoxo
-Angelique

Nice to see that even with some sexy pics, Mike's still keen on the money. He must be gay. Lets see if we can change that Very Happy

_________________
Mutual insurance Forum

Posted: Wed Mar 09, 2005 5:40 am

Meanwhile in Alex land, Mike assures him that everything is just fine.

Quote:

You are very weclome.Am at your service,i will make sure that you get the best of this car when you buy it, ,a customer came last week after seeing what has been done on car demanded the car but i personaly made surethat hedidnt go away with carHe want to rip where he didnt sow.

SO LET IT BE TILL YOU COME BACK FROM YOUR TRIP.

Still Mike

On ya Mike, nothing like customer satisfaction. And Alex hates it when people try to take what's his. Especially after a few tequilas in Vegas...

Quote:

Ahh Mike, you're a godsend.

I don't know what it is about me, but people always see my shit and
try to take it from me. When I was at that bar those navy piledrivers
tried to grab my ass, when I was doing the juki juki in Thailand the
damn hooker tried to take my wallet and now some fuckwit with a jones
for German metal wants my ride. Well good on you for not selling it to
him Mike, I can see that you're a man of your word and not some cafe
late sipping queer who likes watching cable tv with a Bicardi Breezer
in one hand and some man ass in the other. God those homosexuals get
me angry, they think they rule the whole damn world with their tight
red coloured spandex and their ass grabbing rights. They don't
understand that a mans ass is not to be grabbed, you grab ladies ass,
not man ass. Hmmm, might do some of that tonight actually... But I
know I don't have to worry about you Mike, you're a real man, not a
Navy Blue pansy woolie woofta. When I get back I'm going to send you a
bonus with all the money that I owe you, I'm going to organise a
suprise for you my good friend, something that'll have your love
muscle straining - trust me you'll love it.

Thanks again my friend, if you were in the neighbourhood I'd throw a
party for you and let you try my wife's pie, it's awesome!

Cheers Mike
-Alex

_________________
what is an economic recession?

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 03 Oct 2004 Posts: 10

Funny bait Smile

How did you come across this guy?

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