This is the straight-bait that never ends... (now complete)

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Posted: Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:05 pm

Okay, not really, but it is one of my first longer-running marathon baits. I have one that's still going and seems like it really will never end, but I'm waiting to post that until it's done. I've already lost two lads along the way. I'll be posting in chunks, since I need the account space and I'm lazy.
Normally, I wouldn't bother, but there's been a lot of interest in seeing straight baits from beginning to end of late from the newcomers.

Usual approach letter, security company, blah, blah, blah, relevant bits below:

Quote:

I am Mr. Samuel Savimbi, son of the late rebel leader Jonas
Savimbi of Angola who was killed on the 22nd of February 2002. Presently, I am desperately looking for a trustworthy person to assist me in this confidential business. My late father, Jonas Savimbi lodged huge sums of money realized from the sales of diamonds and other precious stones / metals in different banks in Europe. My father is presently no more, and

the movement of his family members (including me) is highly restricted,
all his bank accounts and properties have been frozen and seized.

My father had deposited this money as diplomatic consignment with a
security firm in Europe

blah, blah, old sick mother. You get the idea.

Once again, I am lazy in my reply.

Quote:

I'm not sure I can be much help, but I'll try.

Typical scripted reply:

Quote:

Dear Hannah Lanham

I received your email,please be rest assured that there is going to be no cause
for alarm. I have decided to notify you to ask for your assistance,because of
your integrity and goodwill. I am desperately looking for a trustworthy person
to assist me in this confidential business, We have decided to look for
assistance outside with those that will not capitalise on our present conditon
to
punish us, Because those we used to call our friends and family friends over
here have all deserted us with almost all our properties and belongings we
entrusted with them.

We are forbidden to either travel abroad or out of our immediate localities
because will are under security watch,my late father had deposited this money as
diplomatic consignment with a security firm; The security company have an
affiliate office in canada I have called the security company and they have
confirm to me that the consignment is with them. I have all the documents with
me right now that is needed to collect the consignment from the security
firm, Right now my family has given me the authority to do everything possible
to get the consignment out as this is the only hope we have now to bring the
family out of its present poor financial state.

I am therefore soliciting your help to have this consignment collected by you
and the funds transferred into your account. I will give you all the necessary
documentations to facilitate your collection of the consignment personally,
The government has no or will never have knowledge of this transaction,so
there is no need to be worried about your safety.

Once I have your complete assurance that you can handle this, I will immediately
send to you the relevant documents that will enable you take possession of the
consignment.

This will include certificate of deposit and shipment airway bill and the power
of attorney from my family Lawyer duely signed by me and my Mother,
Meanwhile all I need from you now is as follows:

1. Your confirmation of your ability to handle this.

2. Your word that you will keep this business as confidential as possible at all
times until we conclude this business.

3. Your full name,Your confidential telephone, fax numbers and your address to
enable me prepare the power of attorney in your name as the new beneficiary of
the consigment.

As soon as I get the above information from you, I will also send to you a power
of attorney and the name of the security firm to enable you clear the
consignment on our behalf. Note that this is a very safe transaction as the
Angola government has no knowledge that such money is still in existence.

I am waiting for your response to enable us proceed.

God Bless,

Samuel and family

My reply isn't too exciting. To number 1 I answer

Quote:

I'll do my best. I don't know much about things like this.

To number 2, I answer

Quote:

My lips are sealed.

and I give him my k7 number, and play dumb about the "address", claiming he already has it. He does. My email address, which I reconfirm. (Aren't I helpful?)

I get an enormous blob of a scripted reply with no punctuation as my reward.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I thank you for your willingness to assist us, the family will forever remain
grateful to you, pls I want you to note that you must go to the security company
in person because you must be there physically to clear and collect the 2truck
boxes containing US dollars in cash, but our family lawyer tells me that the
security company will help you open an account with their affliate bank if need
be, so you have nothing to worry about, I want you to know that I am trusting
you completely to handle this for us and pls do not let me down, the conditions
we live under at the moment are hostile and we need to get out of Angola as soon
as we can, we depend on this money to be able to continue our lives, I have all
the document you will require, also our family lawyer will register a Power of
Attorney here at the federal high court, this will give you the legal standing
to represent the family as will be stipulated.
please I depend on you completely to handle this clearance for my sake, things
get worse by the day for us over here, the faster you secure the money the
better for all of us, please I beg you to hasten as soon as possible, while i
want you to travel on time is that my mother she is very sick, now she is
suffering from the cancer of liver please save a soul to travel to canada and
collect the consigment early next week, the transaction will not take you more
than two working days,I depend on trust in you completely, I do apologise for
any inconvenience this may cause now, but it is ultimately for both our success
in life, pls contact me quickly with further information of the security
company.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Here's where I lay low for a bit and let him leave me a voicemail or two.

More later...

Posted: Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:23 pm

The boring bits continue. As my lad doesn't raise me on the k7 number, and I don't email unless emailed first, he sends this:

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you today?I have not heard a word from you since my last mail and I
called your phone and left a message on your anwsering machine,I have been
trying to ensure that I got the whole situation under control, and as God will
have it, I have just secured some means we may be able to handle things without
you having to spend much money or worrying over the genuiness of our
transaction, I am currently arranging with a Diplomat friend introduced to us by
our Family Lawyer, I want him to travel with the Relevant Documents(already
prepared by the Lawyer on your NAME).You are to present the DOCUMENTS to the
Security company for the release of the consignment under his diplomatic
immunity in Canada and he also have a SECURITY PERSONEL ATTACHED to him,they
will have the Documents delivered to you, I have an arrangement with the
Director of the Security Company already, he has aggreed to include our payment
in the special presidential delivery payment Schedule, usually this is a !
privilaged arrangement for long time but I do have an agreement with him now, I
will be allocating some percentage of the Funds to him when you have received
and sign for the delivery,the funds will then be released in cash secured in
2-trunk boxes and then released with the help of my contact the diplomat
friend,but please know that I will not tell him(THE DIPLOMAT) what it
contains,They will have it labelled as containing African art treasures, this is
all he will know, because I do not want us to loose funds to him unnecessarily,
please I need you to confirm to me if you can handle this on your side on our
behalf, because I still wish to invest in the USA, and I also want you to assist
me to do this, please email me immediately so I can conclude the necessary
arrangements because he will be travelling to Canada Tomorrow night 12th
october,2004 with the Documents to you for the release of the consignment.

I thank you so much again for your willingness to Assist my Family and I
urgently await your confirmation.

God bless,

Samuel and family.

Righty-roo. I figure I'll make his day and cook up a convenient "away from the phone" excuse in one blow. First, I respond to his email-before-the-one-above.

Quote:

No problem. I'm a flight attendant, and I regularly make flights into Canada.
Just tell me what I need to do.

In response to his jumpier, more anxious email immediately above, I decide to get a bit pushy and petulant.

Quote:

Okay, so what do I need to do? You haven't told me what to do. You haven't
even told me where in Canada. Canada is a big place, I can't just circle the
country until I bump into your contact. You have to tell me what's going on so
I know what to do.

Now cometh the apparently Canadian-based lad. He of two first names and poor English. I'm given the "security company" contact info, with a side of "guilt trip"

Quote:

I received your email,I will beg you to try your very possible to conclude
everything as soon as possible. I strongly advice you to travel this week. the
transaction will not take you more than two working days. You stand to benefit
15% of the total fund to be collected. The reason why I want you to travel on
time is that my mother is seriously sick now and very close to death. I do not
want her to die like this. I need money to fly her abroad for medical treatment.
She is suffering from Cancer of the liver. So, act fast to save a soul by by
concluding everything with the diplomat of the security company on time.

I will call you today time for security reasons.

Dear Hannah,
I received your email,Please, I beg you once more never to expose this
transaction to nobody except God. You have to understand that this is the very
last and only hope left for the family. So, do not let me down.please you have
to maintain high level of confidentiality You should remember that you are at
the recieving end while I at the giving end..

see contact information of the security company....

GATEWAYGUIDE SECURITY COMPPANY

119 Broad View Avenue,
Point-Claire
Quebec H8R3Z3
TEL: 514- 999-2039.

Contact person...Eric John

Call the security company Mr. Eric John to confirm your arrival date with
him,let him know you are the new beneficairy of the consigment.as soon as you
call him let me know immediately,also the diplomat will call you as soon as
possible.
I await your update.

God Bless,

Samuel and family

So, here comes the security company, shortly.

Posted: Mon Jan 10, 2005 8:51 pm

But first... aw, darn it. I can't call the security company. For a start, I'm not even picking up the phone or dialing the numbers... I have to break this to Sam.

Quote:

I keep calling, but I get this "number not available, it's been disconnected"
recording.

Don't know what to do, now.

As is Samuel Savimbi's wont, he sends me a half-begging email to get a move on.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email,please try to reach the security company today to
enable you finlaise your travelling arragenment with them,I haved tried to
reach you on youyr telephone is always on voice mail,please give me your
confidential number to reach you.

God Bless you for your asssitance to my family.
Samuel and family

Oh, dear, Sam! I haven't another number! (That I'm willing to give you, that is.)

Quote:

That's my only number. I work quite a bit and am often away, but I check voice
mail.

Sam finally goes a bit minimalist, which is how I tend to at least start my baits. Perhaps he's learning that he needn't type an entire encyclopedia each time. Or he's running out of script. Whatever.

Quote:

I received your email,please try and also get hold of Mr.ERIC JOHN of the
security company.
I aait your update.
Samuel and family

Since my lad wants me to call desperately, I avoid doing so, of course. But, must seem helpful...

Quote:

I've called and called, and I can never get an answer. I'm making several trips to Canada this week, perhaps we could just set up a face to face meeting over email?

But my lad's a bit thick about getting that Mr. John hasn't spoken to me at all. This continues to be a theme throughout the bait. Mr. John is not as "on the stick" as Mr. Savimbi.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you so much for the update,please also try your possible best to reach the
security company, you will be making a great deference in our lives and it will
not be too long before we meet because as soon as you collect the boxes of money
I will expect you to assist and guild us on how to meet with you, hopefully you
will send me a letter of invitation to facilitate my travel, kindly inform me as
soon as you are leaving for Canada . We are depending on you. May God
lead and bless you.

samuel and family

Consequently, Hannah gets a shade frustrated with Samuel.

Quote:

Look, how many times do I have to explain that I am an airline attendant. I
make frequent, short trips to Canada, and I'm there for a day or two at a
time. If you could get the security company to tell me where and when I could
meet them, I could drive there fairly easily, most likely. They haven't even
let me know what part of Canada they are in/will be in, or what dates they
will be available. They never answer their phone.

Never mind that they don't answer because Hannah never calls in the first place. It's always the lad's fault!

Posted: Mon Jan 10, 2005 9:09 pm

Oh, dear, Samuel seems to have to prod his partner into doing his job.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email, I will instruct the security company to send you email
or make them to call today,as soon as you received any message from them let me
know immediately.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Samuel's hope springs semi-eternal, it seems.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you ?please kindly let me know if you have been able to reach the
security company.
I will be waiting for your further instructions.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

I try to sow a bit of discord, just for the heck of it. And mainly because I'm bored that the security company isn't involved, yet.

Quote:

I still haven't been able to get through. Every time I call, the line is busy
or unavailable.

Perhaps you should consider a different security company? Are you absolutely
sure they are trustworthy? It sounds more like they're trying to take your
consignment.

Sadly, Sam ignores it and goes on with the "OMG!TehAngst!" lines about needing to get out of the country, and laying on the guilt like mortar on bricks.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email,
Thank you for everything, I beg you again to please ensure that you can finish
everything soon at any cost to us, we desperately need to leave,but we can not
do anything until you have the funds with you, as you have assured me that you
will continue to do your best, I have continue to try my best to keep my family
calm, they are scared and worried, but we will continue to take refuge in God,
please I also need you to be in constant prayers that God will show us a way
out, please I hope to receive good news
from you soon, I will also try my best to continue to reach you by telephone,
our love and prayers remain with you all. Update me soon.as soon as you hear
from the security company always put your telephone open for my call .
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Apparently, Samuel's nagging finally hit home with Eric John. Ah, the security company lives!

Quote:

GATEWAYGUIDE SECURITY COMPANY.

119 Broad View Avenue,
Point-Claire
Quebec H8R3Z3
TEL: 514- 999-2039.

ATTN:HANNAH
FROM:SECURITY VOLT DEPT,

SUBJECT: CONSIGNMENT RELEASE.

DEAR HANNA WE HAVE CALL YOU BY PHONE
YOU DID NOT RETURN OUR CALL, PLEASE CONFIRM THIS E-MAIL
IS YOUR CONTACT ADDRESS.
URGENT,

YOURS FAITHFULLY
MR ERIC JOHN DUTY OFFICIAL
CC: CHANTEL KENNETH M.D.
OCT 29 2004.

I particularly love the high security "volts" they apparently offer. Wonder if they do bank "volts" too?

I throw Samuel a bone and let him know Eric John's in on the scam.

Quote:

Well, they just emailed me, so that's something, at least.

Hannah does not sound impressed. Time to BS the security company...

Quote:

I'm sorry, but every time I call, I get a busy signal or "number not
available" recording. Could we perhaps set up a face to face meeting via
email? I'm a flight attendant, and I often have a layover of a day or two in
Canada. Maybe we could meet in person sometime when I am there?

Hannah

In the meantime, Samuel, persistent little thing, insists he be kept up to speed.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email,please kindly update me of your arrangment with the
security company.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

I reply:

Quote:

We still haven't managed to make contact by phone. I told them in my last
email to set up a face to face meeting somewhere in Canada, but they haven't
acknowledged my message at all.

See how easy this straight baiting is, boys and girls?

Eric John tries to take me to task and seem very businesslike about his official security company duties. Which isn't easy from a yahoo address.

Quote:

Dear Hannah, your concern to your consignment is not prompt.please take note for late payment fee
send us your phone number and tell us best time to reach you by phone
, i would like to know who we are dealing with here for the fact that your the beneficiary.
for this reasons, we are ready to meet with you for your consignment inspection , you would need to open an account here in Montreal to transfer your consignment back to the state.
kindly forward to us your account details to open up an file here
for the documentations reasons. we would need to prove to our bank that you have done contract with our company this is why we are releasing the founds to you.

Note we have a bill of $15000 united state dollar that we have incur
payment for air shipment , Quebec tax's and the federal tax's
we would provide your consignment to you once you arrive here in Montreal Quebec
and we need your comment on this.
urgent
GATEWAYGUIDE SECURITY COMPANY

Meanwhile, Samuel is a busy little bee, keeping in constant contact with me and always asking for updates. His Canadian friend could take a cue from his work ethic.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I received your email, I thank you so much for your update, also thank you for
your efforts, but ensure that you do not miss your appointment as soon as you
hear from them I will be praying constantly that all will be well, I am sure
that the ecurity company officer will assist you as much as
possible, please , you are our only real hope for a better tomorrow, everything
is now in your hands, you are legally representing the family,
ensure that you clear and collect the consignment. Let me I beg you in the name
of God to try not to delay in this matter, the entire future of myself and my
family depends on the consignment, please ensure that you update me immediately
as soon as you hear from them . I thank you for your willingness to assist us,
please my dear friend I beg you to do all you can to ensure kindly make any
arrangement you can, I will also advice that you ensure
that you confirm your arrival date with Canada ,ensure that we do not have any
delay. Kindly keep me constantly updated. May God continue to bless you and
your family .May God bless you.

samuel and family

Somewhat stunned by the enormous fees quoted ($15,000! Don't they scare off a lot of victims that way?), Hannah takes Eric John to task for failing to leave a useful message on her K7 voicemail. The bugger would just phone up, mumble for 30 seconds, seemingly at random, and hang up. And I don't know why he's so hot to trot to call victims, because if there's anything that would scare off a victim, it's this guy's voice. He has what seems to be a very croaky, thick Nigerian accent. If you buy he's a native Canadian named "Eric John", I've got a bridge I'd like for my real estate agent to show you...

Quote:

Well, then, why not just leave me a message or explain to whom or how I am
supposed to make the payment!? You were never available by phone, and you
wouldn't tell me what you wanted. Give me the details about making the payment
if you want the money. I can't very well make a payment I don't know about,
now can I?

Hannah

For fun I try to stir up some trouble between Sam and Eric. I figure Sam may already be miffed that it took some time for Eric to get a move on, so I decide to complain a bit to Sam, in the guise of keeping him in the loop.

Quote:

Well, the rather worthless Eric John from the security company finally told me
what he wanted in an email. Sort of. It seems there is the matter of $15,000
in fees on the consignment.

Of course, the idiot still didn't bother to tell me who or how or where or in
what form I am to make payment on these fees, so I don't know much more than I
did. I asked him to at least give me the details on the taxes and so forth

incurred. I'll see if we can work something out. So far, this Eric John seems
rather horrible at his job. He doesn't spit out what he wants, expects you to
read his mind, and frankly, his grammar skills leave something to be desired.
He doesn't seem overly bright or conscientious about his job.

Hannah

Meh, Sam's not too big on anything but urgency and pleading and begging at this point, so he just lays the guilt on even thicker than before. Poor sick mum!

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I received your email,let us continue to give thanks to God and pray that we
will sort this out very soon, please as I said in my previous emails try your
best to conclude this week, every minute is vital for my family safety and
lives, please keep me updated soon as you have progress. let me know how soon
everything can be finalized, but I know God has answered our prayers, no matter
whatever delay we have faced all will be well in the end, we remain in prayers
with you daily. How is the entire family, please send our love to all, I will
call you as soon as I can, hopefully today , thank you again and God bless all
your effort I trying to call you, please try to be with your phone so we can
speak, I will do anything I can from my end to conclude this without delay,
this is why I am ready to risk all we have to ensure that we can conclude this
immediately, I had also never anticipated that things will go this way or cost
this much to clear, but nevertheless that money is!
all the family has and can lay claim to, we can not afford to have it stranded
or held back for any reason, and I sincerely appreciate every effort you have
made, you are my only hope, and I do not care what kind of arrangement you make
with mr.Eric John I beg you to please ensure that you conclude this arrangement
today with him please do not think I am not understanding of your situation,
but please try to understand my position also, I can not even tell my mother the
true situation or she may die, I just keep telling her everything is okay and
that it will only be a short time before all is cocnluded, I believe and trust
in you my dear, kindly ensure that we come through with this, there is no other
way out for me, you are my family's only hope for tomorrow, please do not let me
down. Please try to get a hold of Mr. Eric and see what you can arrange with
him, I beg you to save our lives from total degradation. I am counting on you
Hannah .
Thank you so much and I hope all will be well soonest, please I will be trying
to call you again, pls email me with any urgent good news.

Samuel and family

Don't worry, sick Mum! Hannah might not be wealthy, but she sounds compliant and willing to help, bless her heart. I set the hook pretty deep and yet, build in an excuse for delay later on.

Quote:

Well, I'll do what I can, but $15,000 is a lot of money for me, and Mr. Eric
John isn't being very cooperative at all about letting me know what needs to
be done, even if I had the money readily available.

Hannah

Samuel, dear little thing that he is, tries to reassure me and blabbers on some more. I'm seeing that Sam is a regular little chatty Kathy when you respond to him.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for the update and let us continue to give thanks to God and pray that
we will sort this out very soon,the money you are paying is for the cost of the
demurage and handling charges so there is nothing for you to be afraid of you
are going to take the money with you when you are going to canada to pay for the
charges, all modalities have been put in place for the final conclusion of this
transaction ,when you pay the charges the consigment will be relaese to you
immediately and you please try your best to conclude everything at any cost
to us because the consigment is with them , every minute is vital for our safety
and lives, please keep me updated soon as you have progress. also give me your
confidential telephone number to reach you .so that you can claim the consigment
as soon as possible.I want to thank you again for everything and all your
efforts, please always call the security to avoid delay be on top of everything
until you have our funds under your con!
trol, we are eargerly waiting for your instructions so that we can begin to make
our travel arrangements to any of the Africa country I thank you for the hope
you have given us again, please send my thanks and love to your family , we
must all be together thank God for answers we get for our prayers, let me know
how soon everything can be finalized, but I know God has answered our prayers,
no matter whatever delay we have faced all will be well in the end, we remain in
prayers with you daily. thank you again and God bless all your efforts.

Samuel and family.

I am 1) miffed at the lazy security company lad (This seems to be a trend. All security company lads can't be arsed to reply to you until you've poked them with a stick a dozen times.) and 2) somewhat grateful to him for being so lazy that I have a reason to delay that isn't an excuse at all. Sam must really be sweating it by now.

Quote:

Well, again, the security company hasn't bothered to contact me. And it will
be difficult for me to come up with $15,000 in a lump sum at such short
notice, but I'll do what I can.

Hannah

The security company responds (finally!) in a mass of typos and caps!

Quote:

PLEASE THE FEE PAYMENT IS JUST ONE OFF THE TWO FACT I NEED
TO ESTABLISH THAT YOU ARE HANNAH LANHAM
PLEASE YOU COULD REACH ME BY PHONE 514-999-2039
THE PHONE NUMBER I HAVE FOR YOU IS 206-xxx-xxxx
WE WOULD NEED THE CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT
I AM READY TO RECEIVE THE PHOTO COPY FROM YOU TO RELEASE THE CONSIGNMENT OUT TO YOU.
WHEN CAN YOU COME TO CANADA TO INSPECT YOUR CONSIGNMENT
DUE TO DUMORAGE INCREMENT HERE QUEBEC CANADA I HOPE YOU KNOW WE HAVE TWO TAX'S TO PAY HERE IN CANADA THE FEDERAL TAX'S AND THE QUEBEC TAXS THE CONSIGNMENT IS OVER TEN MILLIONS VALUE PROPERTY . THIS IS WHY
WE HAVE IN CURE $15000 UNITED STATE DOLLARS YOU FIND THE RECEIVABLE ACCOUNT BELOW FOR THE PAYMENT.

Royal Bank Of Canada
4849 Rue Sherbrooke St.,
Westmount,Quebec,H3Z 1G6

Michael Cole
209-5695 Saint Jacques,
Montreal,Quebec,H4A 2E6.

Acct #........4517363
Transit.........09311
Branch #......003
Swift Code.......ROYCCAT2

ONCE YOU HAVE THE PAYMENT MADE WE ARE OBLIGE TO RECEIVE YOU FROM THE MONTREAL AIRPORT
IMMEDIATELY WE WOULD GO TO THE SECURITY VOLT TO INSPECT YOUR CONSIGNMENT. WE WOULD ALSO NEED YOU TO OPEN UP AN ACCOUNT HERE IN MONTREAL FOR YOUR OWN WORD TRANSFER OF YOUR CONSIGNMENT.

URGENTLY WATTING FOR YOUR RESPOND.

MR ERIC JOHN.

Ho, ho, ho! Merry (early) Christmas to me! A bank account! I immediately pass that on to Rian and 419 Legal and decide to stall as much as necessary, until it has been closed.

Samuel Savimbi. Drama queen and King of Schmaltz, ladies and gentlemen. He keeps at poor Hannah, yet again, about traveling as soon as possible, the cancer, think of the children, oh, the humanity and what about the starving puppies? Or something like that. By now, I was mostly skimming his guilt trips.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I received your email and I Thank you for everything, I beg you again to please
ensure that you can finish everything soon at any cost to us,if you have to
borrow money with interest please do so that when you collect the consigment
from the security company you can pay back, we desperately need to leave,but we
can not do anything until you have the funds with you, please I also need you to
be in constant prayers that God will show us a way out, please I hope to receive
good news from you soon, I will also try my best to continue to reach you by
telephone,
our love and prayers remain with you all. Update me soon.I thank you for your
willingness to assist us, the family will forever remain grateful to you, pls I
want you to note that you must go to the security company in person because you
must be there physically to clear and collect the 2trunk boxes containing US
dollars in cash so you have nothing to worry about, I want you to know that I am
trusting you completely to handle this for us and pls do not let me down, the
conditions we live under at the moment are hostile . we depend on this money to
be able to continue our lives, I have all the document you will require, also
our family lawyer will register a Power of Attorney here at the federal high
court, this will give you the legal standing to represent the family as will be
stipulated.
please I depend on you completely to handle this clearance for my sake, thing
get worse by the day for us over here, the faster you secure the money the
better for all of us, please I beg you to hasten and travel to Canada as soon
as possible, while i want you to travel on time is that my mother she is very
sick, now she is suffering from the cancer of liver please save a soul to travel
to Canada early next week, the transaction will not take you more than two
working days,Now what I want you to do as an international partner is to help us
clear this sum from the Security Company, using your name as the beneficiary of
the fund. On acceptance of this proposal, you will be required in Canada for
the conclusion of this transaction.and you we open an offshore account for this
transaction.for the family,s investment abroad; which you will assist us
materialize. Further information and discussion about this transaction will
commence as soon as you give us the assurance and conf!
idence that this money will be safe when transferred to your account and, please
treat this matter with urgency.
I depend on trust in you completely, I do apologise for any inconvenience this
may cause now, but it is ultimately for both our success in life, pls contact me
quickly with further information.
I await your response
God Bless,
Samuel and family

I decide to have another go at the near incomprehensible security company email, and nitpick the seeming inconsistencies about the fees owed. Nitpicking ladspeak should be an Olympic sport. As always, I plant the seeds for maximum delay. I'm seeing loans in Hannah's future...

Quote:

So, which is it? One payment or two? Please be clearer. What is the total
amount owed? Is there any possibility of making the payment in installments? I
can arrange the travel quite easily, but it may take a little while for me to
obtain the money to pay the fees.

Hannah

Might as well keep Samuel in the loop, as well, so I copy/paste my last exchange and show him how unhelpful and confusing Security Lad is. And add a bit of commentary.

Quote:

I've had a contact from Eric John, but he's still being very vague and
unhelpful. He isn't clear as to whether the $15,000 is all that's due on the
consignment or not, and he needs a copy of the certificate of deposit. Can you
provide that?

Below is our exchange.

stuff I wrote above here, just to prove I'm being truthful...

Samuel, unwilling to let me go for twelve seconds without being replied to, dutifully replies.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you?please kindly update me of your progress with the security company
and let me know your travelling arrangment with them.
I await your update.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Well, at least the security company lad gets back to me in less than a month, and with more high hilarity about their "security volts". I take it they put the trunks behind electric fence...

Quote:

DEAR HANNAH THE TOTAL FEE IS $15,000 UNITED STATE DOLLAR.
THIS IS HOW MUCH WE HAVE SPENT OUT TO HAVE YOUR CONSIGNMENT
SECURE FOR YOU, WITH OUR SECURITY VOLT
ONCE OUR FEE HAVE BEING PAID AND CONFIRM WITH OUR ACCOUNT DEPARTMENT
YOUR CONSIGNMENT WOULD BE RELEASE OUT TO YOUR WISH, WITHOUT NO DELAY.
WE WOULD APPRECIATE THE TOTAL FEE PAID, AFTER ALL YOU ARE THE BENEFICIARY TO THIS CONSIGNMENT,
PLEASE TAKE YOUR TIME, BECAUSE MY COMPANY WOULD NOT NEGOTIATE THE FEE WITH YOU FOR NOW BECAUSE NOTHING HAVE BEING PAID TO GATEWAYGUIDE FOR THE CONSIGNMENT SAFETY AND SECURITY VOLT RENT PAYMENT.

ERIC JOHN

I'm sure you would appreciate the total fee being paid! I would too, if I could get someone to pay me $15,000 for feck all! Now, here, Samuel had to try three times to get the attachment to me. He replied to a different one of my old emails each time, which was rather funny. His first note to me actually had some correspondence, which read.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for the update, the 15,000 dolllars is what is require of you to
collect the consigment as soon as you make the payment you are not going to pay
anything again.please try and make the payment as soon as possible so that you
can go to canada and claim the consigment from the security company .
see the certificate of deposit as an attachment.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Two attempts later, I get this lovely certificate. I am sorely tempted to ask if he used up all his cyan ink in the ole inkjet.

After finally succeeding in getting me the attachment, he repeats his last email, verbatim, for good measure. Spent by the merrymaking over having received a somewhat crap picture trophy of sorts, I probably took a nap. Or didn't. But for the sake of argument, we'll say I did. You can do those things when you straight bait. You can take naps.

Samuel goes all of twelve seconds without hearing from me (I rationed him out to one email a day from me, generally) so of course, I get this.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you?please kindly update me of your arrangment with the security
company.
I await your response.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

So, I update him, and straddle the line between helpful and hopeful.

Quote:

Well, the security company is very clear. They want the entire $15,000 all at
once, and they're not willing to work something out. I'll go to the bank and
see if I can work something out, but I'm not very hopeful about coming up with
that much money. I'm not a wealthy person, and getting $15000 together would
be very hard for me. Maybe I can borrow the money from somewhere else besides
the bank, but it will take a while.

Hannah

I mean, does he think every American's got $15,000 just lying around, in case of emergencies!?

And oh, dear! Mr. John gets back to me and tells me he has an ominous sounding "report on his disk" that tells him they don't use that bank account any more! (Because it got closed perhaps?) Jeepers, I hope this little kink doesn't interfere with me getting my payment there!

Quote:

GATEWAYGUIDE SECURITY COMPANY.

119 Broad View Avenue,
Point-Claire
Quebec H8R3Z3
TEL: 514- 999-2039.

ATTN:HANNAH
FROM:SECURITY VOLT DEPT,

SUBJECT: CONSIGNMENT RELEASE.

DEAR HANNA ,
PLEASE BE INFORMED AS AT TODAY NOVEMBER 8TH 2004, I HAVE A REPORT ON MY DISK SAYING WE ARE NOT CURRENTLY USING THE ACCOUNT WE FORWARDED FOR PAYMENT.
THE ROYAL BANK OF CANADA, PLEASE WE ARE SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE, THE REASONS ARE BASED UPON THE TRANSACTION IT SELF, KINDLY TELL US YOUR PAYMENT DATE IN ORDER TO SEND THE NEW ACCOUNT DETAILS. FOR YOUR PAYMENT. AND WE ARE YET TO RECEIVE YOUR FLIGHT SCHEDULE TO CANADA
AND HOW POSSIBLE TO REACH YOU BY PHONE.
PLEASE TAKE NOTE OF THIS CHENG'S

YOURS FAITHFULLY
MR ERIC JOHN DUTY OFFICER
CC: CHANTEL KENNETH M.D.
NOV 08 2004.

And Samuel, well, Samuel's all heart. I especially love how he encourages Hannah to borrow money she doesn't have (with interest!) to pay te fees on his shipment with the security company! And maybe I'm being picky, but isn't any time you call going to be "today our local time"?

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you so much for the update, I sincerely hope the delay from your side
will not be further prolonged, I will call you today our local time so we can
speak, the entire family is very eager to know that everything is okay and that
we can begin to make our travel arrangements, if you have to borrow ,please
borrow with interest so that when you collect the consigment you can pay back
,please ensure to update me again soon as you send the money to them.
Love and prayers,

Samuel and family

I try again to give the security company a chance to work out a payment plan, sow further possibility for delays, and attempt to fish for another bank account I can send to Rian.

Quote:

As I'm sure you're aware, Mr. John, $15,000 is a lot of money, and it will
take me some time to get this payment together. I need to speak to my bank
about getting a loan and possibly, to relatives about borrowing money. I may
also be able to get a salary advance from my employer. If you would like to go
ahead and provide me with another account to make the payment into, perhaps I
can make the transfers as soon as I obtain the money.

I have about $4000 or $5000 of the payment readily available to me and need to
make arrangements for the rest, since you and your company are unwilling to
let me negotiate the fee or make the payment in installments. And until I can
make the payment, there's not much point in making the travel arrangements, is
there? Your company has made it quite clear that I must have the entire fee
paid before collecting the consignment. I assume all the other details,
including your phone number, are unchanged, should I need to call you?

Hannah Lanham

I also dutifully update Sam, since he's been so attentive to me. He's like clockwork. Email him, get a reply. So I want to keep him replying.

Quote:

Well, I'm trying to borrow, both from the bank and possibly, family members. I
may even need to get a salary advance from my employer in order to get
together that much money all at once. But the security company has been very
clear and unyielding about the fee needing to be paid in full before I can
collect the consignment. I'm going to see the banker soon, and perhaps I can
put my car up as collateral. It's really the only thing of value that I own.
I'll need to get new account details from the security company once I get the
money. They told me the account they sent me previously is no longer used to
accept payments.

I'll let you know something as soon as I can.

Hannah

Posted: Thu Jan 13, 2005 10:10 pm

I tell you, this Samuel, he's on that reply button like white on rice. He's one of the few lads who have replied to me so much, that sometimes, I ignored him and played hard to get.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email and the hope you bring with it,I will call you today
to discuss with you, we are all worried over here and all we can do is pray and
hope that you can resolve and conclude everything before the end of the week so
we can start our travel arrangements, things are tough for us, please extend our
sincere gratituted and thanks to everybody, please keep updating me with
progress you make. Thank you for your efforts and be assured that God will
surely resolve everything quickly, I am positive, although I am still worried by
delay. Let us all continue in prayers.

God bless,

Samuel & family.

He has also spouted off about God to the point that I would like to hogtie him, drag him to church with me, and leave him there for a while. Assuming the soles of his feet wouldn't simply burst into flames the instant he walked in. Fake religious lads really get my dander up.

But in the effort to prevent my dander getting up, the security company comes up with another nice, fat bank account! Which I promptly send off to 419legal, again.

Quote:

GATEWAY GUIDE SECURITY COMPANY.

119 Broad View Avenue,
Point-Claire
Quebec H8R3Z3
TEL: 514- 999-2039.

ATTN:HANNAH LANHAM
FROM:SECURITY VOLT DEPT,

SUBJECT:CONSIGNMENT RELEASE.
WE FORWARD HERE WITH THE NEW ACCOUNT DETAILS
FOR PAYMENT.

SONIA MAY
204-1625 PAXTON
MONTREAL H3J 1M1

BANQUE LAURENTIENNE DU CANADA
4214 WELLINGTON
VERDUN , QC H4G 1WZ
ACCT # 7376501
TRANSIT # 00221
INSTITUTION # 039

KINDLY SEND US THE PAYMENT SLIP TO CONFIRM YOUR PAYMENT.

YOURS FAITHFULLY
MR ERIC JOHN DUTY OFFICIAL
CC: CHANTEL KENNETH M.D.
WED NOV 10 2004.

Rian and his team are a godsend, because I can't imagine tackling a "Hi, I'm a scambaiter, and I don't know how to tell you this, but you've got rats!" letter to the bank. We here at the board cannot thank Rian enough. Nor bow to him enough. Nor gratuitously Rian mention Rian's name Rian enough. If only every country had a Rian.

Samuel, poor lonely thing, emails me again. (sigh) I would settle for a boyfriend half this attentive, you know.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you today?please kindly update me of your progress with the security
company and let me know your travelling arrangment.
Iawait your further action.
God Bless,
Samueland family

When I take more than ten seconds to respond, the little darling even emails me again. Oh, the pain of being irresistible!

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you?please kindly update me of your status of your progress with the security company.

Further more you can send me email through this email address.

God Bless,
Samuel and family

Meanwhile, I decide to stall Mr. John and the security company, and give them a feeling of unease that their bank account is about to curl up and die just like the first one apparently did.

Quote:

Mr. John, are you sure you gave me the correct account information? I've
arranged for the money and I went by the bank to make arrangements for the
payment, but they said they couldn't complete the transfer. Something about
the receiving account being under investigation and temporarily unable to
receive funds. Did you perhaps make a mistake on the account numbers?

Hannah

As usual, Eric John is as lazy in his replying as Samuel is eager. I update Samuel, just so he doesn't explode and get the net cafe messy.

Quote:

Well, I haven't heard anything from Mr. Eric John in a few days. I have
arranged for the money to make the payment, but I went by the bank to make the
transfer, and they said they couldn't do it. Something about the receiving
account being temporarily suspended for being under investigation, and
therefore unable to receive payments. I emailed Mr. John, asking for him to
give me the correct account details and make sure he hadn't made a mistake on
the number or something. I'm trying to make the payment, but I'll have to wait
until Mr. John gets back to me on the proper receiving account. Maybe they're
not accepting payments on this account any longer, either.

Hannah

Finally, security company lad replies.

Quote:

Dear Hannah please can you send the banking information you have, to verify with the accounting department, kindly reply now i am still in the office.

Eric John.

Having not booked me into a guilt trip for some time, Samuel decides to remind me how deplorable everything is there, despite the fact that he apparently spends all day emailing me.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I have received your email and please I need you to understand the present deplorable conditions under which I live with my family, since the death of my father the present Government has been very oppressive to my family, they have siezed practically all that my father hard, we are suffering as it is, and we do not have any money at all, I beg you in the name of the Almighty God to do everything possible within your power not to delay, I do not care what kind of interest we have to pay, once you secure the consignment all will be well, make any arrangement with the security company ,I will advise you send the money through western union to them to hasten everything and travel immediately to Canada so that there will be know delay. what is vital is that you secure the consignment, all our lives depend on that deposit it is all that we have, you are our only hope and I am depending and counting on you not to let us down at this very crutial time, please my dear friend kindly handle things quickly, also keep me update of your progress I will continue praying that the Good lord will show you a way to finish this quickly and successfully for the sake of my familyI must tell you that I depend on you to clear everything for us, we live presently under disspeakable situations because of the hostility of the present Government, please do not relent, handle everything as quickly as possible so you can also help us to get out of Angola as soon as you have the money in your possesion, May the good Lord lead you and bless you, please confirm to me the position after you have email the security company,let me know when you are leaving for Canada to claim the consigment, pls treat with urgency thank you so much and God bless you,

Samuel and family

Oooh, now Eric gets all testy when I don't reply right away. He's very snippy.

Quote:

Dear Hannah i would appreciate prompt responds, i have look into your file
we change our account because of the Canadian conversation rate,
please take note we have no account that is being investigated
my last mail i told you i would appreciate you forward the payment account you have
for verification purposes . kindly update me.
Eric John

Jeepers, he looked into my file! I feel so violated. Maybe I'm psychic about the "account being investigated" thing. So sue me. To cause even more confusion, I had "reconfirmed" the account details by simply including his email to me containing them. Seeing as we never clipped our replies, they were hopelessly buried. To cause even further confusion, I accidentally sent him the first, already-closed account anyway. Whoops! Oh, well, that never prevented a good slap.

Quote:

I just did. It's right here in your email. Below. I included the text of the
message where you gave me the account details.

Hannah

I won't notice my mistake for a little while.
A bit tired of Samuel's whining, Hannah decides to do some of her own.

Quote:

> Dear Hannah,
> I have received your email and please I need you to understand the >present
deplorable conditions under which I live with my family, since >the death of
my father the present Government has been very oppressive >to my family,
they have siezed practically all that my father hard, we >are suffering as it
is, and we do not have any money at all, I beg you >in the name of the
Almighty God to do everything possible within your >power not to delay,

You have already told me, repeatedly, what dire straits you're in. And I am
doing my best to help. However, Mr. John from the security company has been
very uncooperative and downright incompetent at times. I replied to his email
asking if the account information he gave me was accurate, and he emailed
back, asking me to provide him with the account details I had EVEN THOUGH THEY
WERE RIGHT THERE IN THE EMAIL he sent back to me. It's been very frustrating.
He's not very helpful at all.

>I do not care what kind of interest we have to pay, once you secure >the
consignment all will be well, make any arrangement with the >security company
,

YOU might not care what kind of money you have to pay to the security company,
but I had to borrow and scrounge everything I have in order to try to make
this payment for you. I am not a wealthy person, Mr. Savimbi. So I would
appreciate it if you would stop acting like $15,000 is nothing at all to me. I
had to borrow from the bank and relatives, and get a pay advance at work. And
if the security company is not cooperating, it's very difficult to make
arrangements with them.

>I will advise you send the money through western union >to them to hasten
everything and travel immediately to Canada so that >there will be know delay.
what is vital is that you secure the >consignment, all our lives depend on
that deposit it is all that we >have, you are our only hope and I am
depending and counting on you not to let us down at this very crutial time,
please my dear friend kindly
> handle things quickly, also keep me update of your progress I will
continue praying that the Good lord will show you a way to finish this
quickly and successfully for the sake of my familyI must tell you that I
depend on you to clear everything for us, we live presently under disspeakable
situations because of the hostility of the present Government, please do not
relent, handle everything as quickly as possible so you can also help us to
get out of Angola as soon as you have the money in your possesion, May the
good Lord lead you and bless you, please confirm to me the position after you
have email the security company,let me know when you are leaving for Canada to
claim the consigment, pls treat with urgency thank you so much and God bless
you,
>
> Samuel and family
>

Western Union? The bank won't accept payment through Western Union. They want
a transfer to a bank account. I can't send $15,000 dollars through Western
Union. It would take weeks to break the money up into payments small enough! I
am doing the best I can, but Gateway Security is not making it easy. I will
make the payment and travel as soon as possible, but I can't make the payment
if my local bank refuses to do the transfer because the receiving account is
under investigation. I understand your position, but you have to understand
mine, as well. I'm trying my best to help, but I can't do it alone.

Hannah

Hannah's downright inspirational, isn't she? Plugging away... willing to get loans... so determined to help. Why, she even realizes her "oops" with the bank details she forwarded earlier. She rushes to correct things, and even apologizes. *gag*

Quote:

Sorry, I think the account details I just sent you are the wrong ones. The
last ones you provided me with were
SONIA MAY
204-1625 PAXTON
MONTREAL H3J 1M1

BANQUE LAURENTIENNE DU CANADA
4214 WELLINGTON
VERDUN , QC H4G 1WZ
ACCT # 7376501
TRANSIT # 00221
INSTITUTION # 039

The Royal Bank of Canada account was closed, and you passed that along to me.
But I tried making hte payment to Banque Laurentienne, and that's the one the
bank said was under investigation. Sorry for the mixup. At any rate, neither
of the receiving accounts work.

Hannah

Samuel, of course, just huggles me to pieces for still being willing to help and urges me, yet again, to go to Canada.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

I received your email, thank you for the update, we are as worried as you are, our lives have been completely unstable for a long time now, everything must be concluded this time, nothing can go wrong as long as we put our complete trust in God, I believe everything will be okay, I will call you today always put your phone on so that we can talk,if you cannot send the money through western union,I will advise again you carry the money cash to canada yourself and pay for the cost. so that you know what you are paying for.

Lots of love and prayers,

Samuel and family

Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 9:30 pm

Having gotten his bank accounts all "deaded", Eric John makes a desperate bid for a Moneygram. I can even take my pick as to who to send it to!

Quote:

Dear Hannah please you find the names below to send the payment by
money gram quick payment. with this type of payment we would be able to confirm your payment immediately with the control numbers.

(1) HILLARY PIUS
11372 SHER BROOK STREET MONTREAL QUEBEC H8R 3Z3

(2) MRS SANDRA. E. JOHN
987 RUE NEWMAN VILLE LASALLE MONTREAL H3N 1T1

(3) KELLY. V. PETER
335 BROAD VIEW AVENUE POINT CLAIR MONTREAL QC H3N 1M8

ERIC JOHN

Taking advantage of a very real restriction mentioned on Moneygram's site, I claim I can't break up the payments. (Which is true, if you're being honest with the MG agent... and of course, Hannah is.) So I send Eric John this sad news...

Quote:

I went by the MoneyGram office, and they said I can't split up or "structure"
the payment, as they put it, because that would put them in violation of
Anti-Money Laundering regulations, since this total amount is going toward the
same service. They said I would have to pick one recipient and fill out the
documents necessary for payments over $10,000, and that would have to be
cleared before the payment could be assigned a number and released. It would
also cost an enormous amount of money.

Since I'm due to be flying into Montreal again, Nov 27, 12:46AM, arriving on
Delta (Comair) 5019, why don't I just bring the money then and pay in person?
You could meet me at the airport.

Hannah

I'm hoping to get Mr. John out to the airport for a meet and greet, at that point.

And, of course, Hannah faithfully keeps Samuel Savimbi informed.

Quote:

I should be flying into Montreal again on November 27. I've offered to pay in
person, should they be interested and willing to meet me.

Hannah

As usual, he butters me up so well, I should be slicker than a greased pig. [/end southernism...]

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

Thank you so much for all your efforts, our very sincere appreciation for everything, please let the security company know nd confirm your arrival date with them that you are coming on the said date and let them know you are coming with the cash personally please ensure to let me know the time frame you believe everything will be concluded officially please email me and let me know every progress. Let us all remain in prayers and praise to God.

Love and prayers,

Samuel & family.

I just love how these lads seem to think everyone can afford a cell phone, you always have a signal, and we just have them everywhere. They seem to expect even my characters who are living hand to mouth to have a cell phone, dammit. (Not that I'm bitter or anything... I have a cell phone. For emergencies only. But I know plenty of people who really can't afford one.) Eric John lets me know he's pleased I'm coming, he picks one recipient for the Moneygram payment, and he also seems to have been convinced that HE's the flight attendant, given his last line.

Quote:

Dear Hannah, thank you, we have your flight schedule for Nov 27, 12:46AM,
one off official will meet with you. and please come with the certificate of deposit
and a cell phone to reach you here in Montreal, at all time.
for us to have your consignment ready for your inspection we would appreciate you make a payment of at list $3000 united state dollar before you leave for Canada to have the consignment release document ready for your signatory.this payment would process
all the release document that transform you to be the new beneficiary.

kindly make payment with the name below

(1) MRS HILLARY PIUS
11372 SHER BROOK STREET MONTREAL QUEBEC H8R 3Z3

We welcome you to Canada.

Eric John
Thu Nov 18

Samuel keeps the pressure on, too.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

Please kidnly update me of your arrangment with the security company.

I await your update.

God Bless,

Samuel and family

Hannah, longsuffering thing that she is, obliges. And lays on some of her own schmaltz. Samuel seems to be immune. He and Mr. John must have built up a tolerance, by now.

Quote:

I've made arrangements to meet an official from the security company in
Montreal on the 27th. I'll be bringing the entire payment in cash. He wanted
me to wire ahead $3000 of the payment, but there's no way I can afford the
fees on wiring that much money. I had to borrow everything I could stand just
to get the fees ont he trunkboxes. They will meet me at the airport.

Hannah

Posted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 10:19 pm

Samuel, bless his crooked little heart, really goes in there for the sympathy and the pleading on this one. He is attempting to tug at my heartstrings every which way.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
I received youe email,please just follow the official of the procedure of the security company in order not to jeopardize this transaction,if you have to wire the 3000 dollars to them for thier perusal so that they will make all the neccesary arrangment for you, so that there will not be any delays,because the transaction will not take you more than two working days to complete,all the money you have borrowed will be pay back as soon as you collect the consigmentfrom the security company,do not forget you have the certificate of deposit already, please do send them the money so that you will bring the balance of the money to them when you are coming on the 27th .all mpdlaities have been put in place for the delivery of the consigment to you.

I await your prompt response.

God Bless,
Samuel and family

Or should that be "get at my checkbook"?

And Eric John gets his digs in for me to send the payment. Heaven forbid I not send the payment ahead!

Quote:

Dear Hannah it important you pay $3000 befor leaving for Canada on the 27th
kindly file out the payment document with the money transfer agent
this is only when your request could be process and you are giving the control number.
with the control number we would be able to receive the fee and we would then be ready to have you sign the release document.that allow you to inspect the consignment.
we are ready to receive you from the airport. i would appreciate you listern to my directives
and act fast. thank you.

I decide to plead both "red tape" and being extremely strapped for cash.
First to Samuel Savimbi.

Quote:

Do you know how much it costs to wire $3000 to Canada? $250. I do not have
that kind of money just lying around. If it weren't for the fact that I work
for an airline and am scheduled to be in Montreal on the 27th because of work,
I wouldn't even be able to afford to GO to Montreal, I'm so far in debt. I'll
go by Moneygram again, but from what they told me last time, it would take
until nearly the 27th for the paperwork to clear to let the transaction go
through, anyway. Because it's for $3000, and that hits their anti-money
laundering limit. I would need to borrow the $250 just to be able to afford to
wire the $3000.

Hannah

With Eric John, I decide to get pedantic and ask him why the hell he's bringing this up at the last minute, when it hasn't been mentioned before.

Quote:

> Dear Hannah it important you pay $3000 befor leaving for Canada on the 27th

Why, exactly? You never mentioned that part of the payment had to be in hand
before I arrived. In fact, when I asked about making the payment in
installments, you told me it couldn't be done, that I had to pay all the taxes
and fees at once. What's changed?

> kindly file out the payment document with the money transfer agent
> this is only when your request could be process and you are giving the
control number.
> with the control number we would be able to receive the fee and we would
then be ready to have you sign the release document.that allow you to inspect
the consignment.
> we are ready to receive you from the airport. i would appreciate you listern
to my directives
> and act fast. thank you.
>
>

Do you know how much it costs to wire $3000 to Canada? $250. I do not have
that kind of money just lying around. If it weren't for the fact that I work
for an airline and am scheduled to be in Montreal on the 27th because of work,
I wouldn't even be able to afford to GO to Montreal, I'm so far in debt. I'll
go by Moneygram again, but from what they told me last time, it would take
until nearly the 27th for the paperwork to clear to let the transaction go
through, anyway. Because it's for $3000, and that hits their anti-money
laundering limit. I would need to borrow the $250 just to be able to afford to
wire the $3000. I don't know if I can find anyone to borrow that from. It's
either that, or talk the landlord into letting me be late with my rent.

Hannah

But do the little buggers have any sympathy? No.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

Thak you for your email,please do anything at any cost to enable you collect the consigment as soon as you collect the consigment from the security company everything will be okay,also send the security company the 3000 dollars so that all will be okay,as soon as you send them the money let me know immediately.you are my family only hope.

God Bless you.

Samuel and family

Here is where I would like to pop Samuel's head off his neck. And the little man has the complete gall to keep at me!

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
How are you ?Thank you so much for everything as I will try to call you as often as I can so I can be aware of your travelling arrangment the entire family sends their love and gratitude, please continue to update me regularly by email also. I thank God for our success, really looking forward to meet you soon, my love to everyone.

God bless, love and prayers always,

Samuel and family

In fact, he sent that last one twice.

Eric John pretty much repeats himself, in what I'm sure he believes is stunning legalese.

Quote:

Dear Hannah it important you pay $3000 befor leaving for Canada on the 27th
kindly file out the payment document with the money transfer agent
this is only when your request could be process and you are giving the control number.
with the control number we would be able to receive the fee and we would then be ready to have you sign the release document.that allow you to inspect the consignment.
we are ready to receive you from the airport. i would appreciate you listern to my directives
and act fast. thank you.

But Hannah is not about to let him steamroll her without a fight. She demands an answer.

Quote:

You did not answer my question. Why do you now want me to send part of the
money ahead of my arrival in Montreal, when earlier, you insisted that the
entire amount of $15,000 had to be paid at once?

You've given me no reason and no explanation, only repeated your instructions.
Please answer my question. I can't very well pay the transfer fee if I don't
have the money available, now can I? I will need to talk to my landlord and
see if he can delay collecting my rent just to be able to afford to send the
$3000. Besides, if I understood the clerk right on my last visit, the
paperwork will take until nearly the 27th to clear anyway. In other words, I
would be spending $250 to send you money that probably won't arrive before I
do. When I could bring the entire $15,000 fee with me and pay you in person,
and not have to spend an additional $250, which I cannot really afford at this
time. There needs to be a very good reason for this transfer before I can
justify it.

Hannah

What the heck, it was an additional delay. Eric John is all fecking heart.

Quote:

If it would cost you $250 then pay it, the reason we need the money is to get all the documents you need to sign with the Canadian revenue ready for you and also to start the process to change the benificiary to you. then come with the balance $12000
for the consignment inspection here in quebec, do this now and send in the control number

Eric John

Samuel has not heard from me in three minutes, so he sends me another mail.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you?I hope everything is okay,please kindly update me of your arrangment with the security company,every moment is vital for us here,so that will can leave on time.

I await your update.

God Bless,

Samuel and family

Hannah has an answer for everything. And she seems to be growing more and more suspicious...

Quote:

I'm going to be there in Montreal for several days. That should be enough time
for me to pay the $3000 up front, in person, allow you to prepare the
documents and then pay the balance. I'm going to be there for at least a week,
and you're not even asking for a week's lead time for the transfer.

Hannah

Sorry, Sam! Hannah has to notify you of the kink, now!

Quote:

Mr. John cannot give me a reasonable explanation of why he wants the payment
ahead of time, or why he has suddenly switched from asking for the payment to
be directed to a bank account to asking for a wire transfer like Western Union
or Moneygram. His only explanation is that he needs the money to get the
documents ready. However, as I am going to be in Montreal for at least a week,
I should be able to give him the first payment in person, wait for the
documents, sign and pay the balance while I am still in Montreal. I cannot
afford to throw away $250 on the fee to wire him the payment. I cannot pay my
rent and I will be tossed out on the street if I use that money to wire the
$3000 ahead.

Hannah

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 3:27 am

Samuel, as always, is quick on the reply button. Cue the tiny violins in the background.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,
Thank you for your email and update,please follow the instructions of the security company in other not to jeopardize this transaction, this is the only money my family can lay claim to please do your best to conclude everything with the security company, as soon as you hear more news from them let me know immediately.Do not forget my family trusted you do not let us down at this crucial time.
God Bless,
Samuel and family

Funny. He's always got net cafe money...

And now, we get to the part of the bait that always seems to come up, without fail, when I am dealing with a lad. The rampant gender confusion. I don't know if the poor souls just honestly can't tell the difference between the sexes (Judging from some of the "lad describes sex" emails and some of the ridiculous reactions to "sexy photos" around here, I'm inclined to believe that lads don't even get "tab A goes into slot B" sex ed.), they are so inundated with possible vicitims that they honestly can't keep up with who is a boy and who is a girl, or if they just plain can't get their tiny pea-brains wrapped around the idea of a woman being involved in a business deal, or all three and then some. But in nearly every bait I've done, the lad has given me a quick sex-change in the middle of it. Lads seemt o have no concept of what is a typical male name or a typical female name in Western society. Or which is the family name, either, for that matter. And this Eric John really is Canada! Can't he be bothered to learn anything about his adopted homeland darn it?

Anyway, Eric slips up big time here. He mentions someone Ihe's never mentioned before, and he calls me a man. Plus, he gets bossy and snippy.

Quote:

Dear Hannah I have told Jude Estrada that i would be able to release this consignment out to you if only you are obedient and attentive
i have told you time without number that i am a very busy man like you, i have not being able to talk to you by phone, i only have in the file that you are flight attendant, i respect that. I Have write continuously at this time i would not accept your attitude if you are not financial capable tell us now, and don't west my time, the consignment is a valuable property that would require $15000 total to release this consignment. if you are in Montreal for a week is fine i would appreciate you make this payment now send the control number to avoid late payment fee if only you would understand and beside what is your address beside.
i have being very patience with you. we receive the control number fine bout not i would simply disqualify you. i have spent time trying to make you make payment that you own if you are a difficult man i don't think i wold work with you there is every reason to keep and respect the transaction confidentiality. and there is every reason for you to listen and act immediately when you are told.
Eric John.

Okay, sucker. You have gone and done it now. I feel like giving him a slap his mama can feel, but I settle and respond more like a real, genuine victim who is really starting to get irate with the careless way this security company is treating her. I decide to shoot his story full of holes like Swiss cheese and get stroppy right back. But reasonably stroppy. I don't want to lose him just yet.

Quote:

> Dear Hannah I have told Jude Estrada

And who is Jude Estrada? You haven't mentioned him before that I can
remember.

>that i would be able to release this consignment out to you if only you >are
obedient and attentive

I was obedient and attentive Mr. John. I contacted you promptly, and you often
waited days to get back to me. You gave me one bank account to make the
payment into. I attempted to make part of the payment, but before I could make
the payment, you contact me and tell me that you no longer use that bank
account to receive payments. You then give me a different account at a
completely different bank, and direct me to make payment there. When I do so,
the bank tells me that the account is under investigation. Then, suddenly, you
completely reverse your position on the entire fee needing to be paid at once,
and you change methods of payment on me. You first say I can make the payment
in person, then you change the method yet again. To wiring money rather than a
secure bank transfer. You can give me no good reason for this change. I have
been very, very patient and understanding, and you have done nothing but talk
in circles and reverse positions constantly. You have been nothing but a
moving target.

> i have told you time without number that i am a very busy man like you, >i
have not being able to talk to you by phone, i only have in the file >that
you are flight attendant, i respect that. I Have write continuously >at this
time i would not accept your attitude if you are not financial >capable tell
us now,

I was very up front with you about my financial situation. I told you that I
would need to borrow the money, I made arrangements to do so, and you suddenly
change the method of payment on me, so that there are an additional $250 in
fees, just in order to pay part of the fees! I suppose you think if I'm not
wealthy, I'm not worthy of your time. If that's your attitude, I don't think
you'll be very successful in life.

And to boot, you have been corresponding with me all this time, yet you don't
even know I am a WOMAN! My name is Hannah. Hannah Lanham. First name Hannah. A
female name. My last name is Lanham. It's not as though I have an ambiguous
first name, Mr. John, yet you are so thick, you don't even recognize Hannah
Lanham as a female name?

>and don't west my time, the consignment is a valuable property that >would
require $15000 total to release this consignment. if you are in >Montreal for
a week is fine i would appreciate you make this payment now >send the control
number to avoid late payment fee if only you would >understand and beside what
is your address beside.

You mentioned nothing about a late payment fee. You have never put forward a
deadline, nor have you mentioned a payment due date. I think you're just
pulling this to make yourself feel important and powerful.

> i have being very patience with you. we receive the control number fine
bout not i would simply disqualify you. i have spent time trying to make you
make payment that you own if you are a difficult man i don't think i wold work
with you there is every reason to keep and respect the transaction
confidentiality. and there is every reason for you to listen and act
immediately when you are told.
> Eric John.
>
>

Told? Told!? Do you think I'm a child or yours to command? Fine. If you want
to meet me in Montreal and accept the fee in full, that's all well and good.
But I am not bankrupting myself in order to send the payment ahead of me when
you keep pulling this nonsense out of thin air. How many times do I have to
tell you that it won't even clear the paperwork stage before I get there. You
can meet me in Montreal or not. I'll have the cash with me to pay for the
$15,000 in fees, and if you're not there to accept, I'll pay back my loans and
call it a loss. Your choice.

Frankly, I don't think you give a damn about your clients or your job. You're
obviously rude, nasty, and borderline incompetent. You can't even type or
spell properly, and you can't even recognize a female name when it's right in
front of you. I hate to disappoint the people who are depending on me to
collect this consignment, but I cannot bankrupt myself and get myself thrown
out on the street in the process of trying to pay these fees you keep coming
up with, either.

If you're going to insult me by calling me difficult, Mr. John, at least get
it right and call me a difficult WOMAN, not a difficult man.

Hannah Lanham

Which is all a long-winded and polite way of sayng "You are an idiotic mugu. You are pitiful at scamming, you're sloppy, you're lazy, and I am saying 'Dance, mugu, dance! Give me more crappily spelled business-speak!'. Oh, and your penis is tiny, too."

Can this guy get any thicker? Why do I even bother to ask? Of course he can. And he does.

Quote:

You have been nothing but a
moving target. what do you mean by this staement?
beside i dont now your sex, and thanks for the compliment alist i know now that you are a woman. would you tell me where you leave in the state?

In essence "Hi, though I am supposedly an important security company exec in Canada, I know nothing of your wily English sayings! Or how to spellcheck. Or type. Or the definition of the word 'compliment'. Or the difference between boys and girls, despite the fact that I've been corresponding with you for weeks. Please excuse my complete screwup. Oh, and I either stink at geography or typing, because I seem to think Canada's neighbor to the south is only one state. And I've lost your address."

Hannah gets in a dig or two in return. Relatively mild, but I want him to think I'm a genuine victim, still hoping for the payoff.

Quote:

> You have been nothing but a
> moving target. what do you mean by this staement?

I mean you've changed your "story" so many times that it's making me dizzy.
You keep changing the "facts" every time you contact me. Every time, a
different story.

> beside i dont now your sex,

Why would you assume Hannah is a man's name? I have never once encountered a
male named Hannah. It is a woman's name. How could you not know that? Have you
lived in a cave your entire life?

>and thanks for the compliment

What compliment? I've been far from complimentary.

>alist i know now that you are a woman. would you tell me where you leave >in
the state?

As I've already told you, I live in Washington. Why would you want to know,
anyway? You've already made it clear that you aren't interested in me as a
person, just in getting your hands on my money. You don't care if I get tossed
out of my apartment or can't buy groceries, so long as you get your $3000
wired ahead.

Hannah

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 3:46 am

In the meantime, Samuel fires up the violins again. Yawn. Hasn't his old, sick mother croaked, yet?

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you?Thank you for everything, I beg you again to please ensure that you can finish everything soon at any cost to us, we desperately need to leave,but
we can not do anything until you have the funds with you, as you have I hope to receive good news from you soon, I will also try my best to continue to reach you by telephone,our love and prayers remain with you all. please assured me that you will continue to do your best, I have continue to try my best to keep my family calm, they are scared and worried, but we will continue to take refuge in God, please I also need you to be in constant prayers that God will show us a way out, and also confirm your arrival date with the security company and let them know when you are coming.I will call you soon.please confirm your arrival date with Mr.Eric John Today and get back to me,if you cannot send the money through western union take the money in cash to them.
I await your update from the security company.

God Bless you for your assistance to my family.

Samuel and family

Eric John replies again, and actually sounds halfway conciliatory.

Quote:

Dear Hannah please what is your address? kindly stop the insult, and don't take it personal,
i am only do my job. we need to process your request. this is why we need to receive the fee
asked for. i don't mean to disrespect you.
kindly send me your address .

Translation: No. Really. What's your address? Either I forgot to ask for it, or I lost it. Either way, I'm screwed on making the fake documents. Send me the money... please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?

Cue Samuel again. Sorry. Samuel and family. Isn't that cute? I bet they all huddle around one keyboard in the internet cafe...

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you ?Ihope everything is okay from your end Ihope you arestill leaving tommorrow,I will wait for your further instructions, please extend my greetings to everyone God bless you so much for your help to my whole family, we will also speak as soon as I can.

Stay Blessed,

Samuel and family

And again...

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

Howare you?please kindly update me if you have arrive Canada.

Iawait your update.

God Bless,

Samueland family

Dammit man! Keep your knickers on! I'm not even supposed to arrive until tomorrow!

Ah, but there's trouble in paradise. On the 28th, the day after Hannah was to arrive, she sends this to both Eric and Samuel. Oh, the humanity!

Quote:

I can't believe you two! You were trying to scam me, you filthy, lying,
disgusting thieves! I was waiting in the airport, preparing to board my flight
and meet Mr. "John" in Montreal, and I happened to pass by the small Western
Union outlet inside the airport while stretching my legs before the flight.

Imagine my shock and horror when I picked up one of the pamphlets that caught
my eye and read about scammers that sounded very, very familiar. I swapped
assignments with a fellow flight attendant and took her route instead,
somewhere far, far away from Montreal. I'm asking my employer to avoid putting
me on that route ever again. I just thank God that I saw this pamphlet when I
did and found out that the two of you are lying thieves out to scam me before
I lost any money to you. You should be ashamed of yourselves. You, especially,
Mr. John. Here you are, in North America, where you can actually make
something of yourself, let into Canada, a land of plenty where you have all
the opportunity in the world, and how do you repay that kindness? By stealing
from innocent people! I'm disgusted and ashamed that I ever considered
"helping" you people. I thought I was doing something good, but I'm going to
make sure that everyone I know finds out about people like you. I don't want
one of my friends or relatives falling prey to you horrible vultures. I'll be
able to return the money I borrowed and not lose anything, no thanks to you
people. You make me sick.

Hannah

Attached is this little beauty.

Now, this is sometimes a bait killer, and the lad disappears. But most of the time, the lad attempts to deny it and keep you on the hook. The results can be most amusing, and you can end baits reasonably, without ever revealing that you are a baiter. And the lad gets the extreme heartache of a "near miss" and the worry over just how many of these pamphlets there are. I love whipping this out when I've run out of road.

Eric John is damned near speechless. Which for him is an accomplishment!

Quote:

Dear Hannah you are totally unbelievable what a shame to think very low off me.

And he still can't spell.

Slightly disappointed at not getting a nasty death threat, Hannah pokes him again.

Quote:

I notice you don't deny that you ARE a scammer and a thief. Of course I think
very low of womeone who tried to rip me off and play on my sympathies! You
should be thoroughly ashamed of yourself.

Hannah

Jehosephat, he's thick. He responds...

Quote:

Dear Hannah, can you explain the reasons for all this insult ? are you saying we don't have the consignment WITH US and you are not ready to receive the founds?.
urgent respond.
ERIC JOHN.

Yes! News flash, mugu! You're lying! And, no, you can't have my "founds".

Here's what I love about straight baits. I get to tell off the scammer, vent, and never once leave him any the wiser that he's been wasting his time with a victim that was never going to pay off. Leaving him very ripe to be baited again. Or, in this instance, to drag the same bait along even more. I love lads that try to prove their "honesty".

Quote:

How many ways can I say it? You are not the employee of a security company.
There is no consignment. Samuel Savimbi is not part of a family that left a
consignment with you. You are both lying scammers. You are thieves. You lie to
people, telling them you have a consignment, but all you are interested in is
getting your "fees" for taxes on the non-existent consignment, which are
supposedly to pay taxes and demurrages.

That is why your bank account was "no longer accepting charges". It probably
got shut down when one of your victims reported you to the bank. That explains
why you gave me another account at a different bank. That one probably got
reported, too, since the bank told me it was under investigation. It also
explains why you suddenly wanted part of the payment through Western Union all
of a sudden. You were going to take the $3000 and disappear. THAT's why you
suddenly, without reason, wanted me to pay part of the taxes and fees up
front, before arriving in Montreal. You weren't interested in meeting me. You
weren't interested in the rest of the money. You were just interested in
getting whatever you could get me to send without arousing too much suspicion
of money laundering. It expains why you didn't want me to send the entire
$15,000. That would draw too much attention. You thought $3000 wouldn't be
that suspicious. You didn't even bother to ask for any of my details for
paperwork, just "send the fees, send the fees, send the fees". That's all I
heard from you.

Because you are a lying, thieving scammer with no consignment and no security
company. You are a 419 scammer. You haven't given me one damned shred of
evidence that you are legitimate. Not an ID, not any proof of the
consignment's existence, nothing. YOU ARE A FRAUD. Plain enough for you "Eric
John"? A legitimate employee of a security company in Canada would be able to
speak decent English. He would also NOT be using a Yahoo address. You're a
fake.

Hannah

Whew! I feel better!

Samuel finally replies, with a lot of handshaking and RanDom CapitaLization.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

I am really surprised at your email and dissappionted at your conclusions;I am
aware there are Bad people in the world but I and my family are not one of such
people.We shall ever remain greatfull to you if you can Help us,out of this
situation of ours;In your last email you sounded terrible but we are not what
you think we are.You have to see to the end before you can conclude on issues
like that.

Thanks anyway for your time.

Regards,

Samuel and family.

What the heck, I make a last ditch bid for a trophy. I figure I can at least waste some of his surfing money sending me a picture.

Quote:

Tell you what. I'll reconsider helping you if you can send me a picture of you
and your family. I'm pretty sure you're completely full of lies, you're a
scammer, and you have no sick mother, but if you can prove it, I'll help.

Hannah

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 4:55 pm

Samuel (or more likely his oga) is a sneaky little devil, and appears to go for keeping me on the hook and maybe getting me in a fake check scam, since a mysterious "financier" is introduced! Oh, the cloak and daggerness of it all!

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

It beats my Immaginations that you still do not beleive me,well I do not blame
you for your actions.I can not send you my family pictures now for SECURITY
REASONS but I do know one thing that very soon we shall meet physically.I have
been able to gather all the cost of claiming the consignment from the Security
Company and the Director has told me that it will cost me about
$75,000.00(seventy-five thousand USD) to have the consignment cleared;Hannah I
do not want you to spend a dollar anymore,I have been able to make contact with
a Private Financier in London for Loan through the help of my family lawyer and
he is ready to help me;But I still need you you to play a vital role in this
whole transaction because your NAME is already with the Security Company as the
new beneficiary of the consignment.Hannah,all I want you to do now is to contact
this Financier in London and see that the $75,000.00 is paid to you to enable
you clear/claim the consignment out from the Security Com!
pany on time.Please contact the Financer as soon as possible in the address
below,

NAME:Jay Richardson
Email:[email protected]
Tel.No.:0044-7944450583.

Hannah,I decided to take this extra mile step,
1.Because I do not want my MOTHER to die under this conditions that we are
facing at the moment.
2.Because I want to prove to you that we are not liars/scammers that you think
we are.
And again,Hannah it is very important that you write a letter of Appology to Mr.
Eric John of the Security Company.

I await your swift response to my email.

Have a nice day,

Regards,

Samuel Savimbi and Family.

What the heck, again. I'll go for wasting yet another lad's time, at least for a little while.

So I try to contact the financier, who will later prove to be as elusive as the security company lad.

Quote:

Mr. Richardson, I'm contacting you in regards to the consignment Samuel
Savimbi wants me to retrieve for him and his family. He claims he has made
arrangements for you to pay me $75,000 in order to retrieve the consignment.
If this is so, please reply to me as to what I am supposed to do in order to
complete the transaction. Mr. Savimbi's letter, as you can see, is included
below.

Mr. Savimbi, if you are indeed genuine, then I'm sorry I doubted you. But you
must understand that you were a complete stranger, asking me to put money I
had to borrow on the line for a consignment, the existence of which has not
been proven to me. I could not afford to lose that money, and you and Mr. John were indifferent at best to that fact and did nothing to prove yourselves in
my eyes. But I'm willing to offer you a second chance. If you really are
genuine, I would like to help you, if possible. But I am still skeptical. I
will believe it, as they say, when I see it. I'll write a quick letter to Mr.
John.

Hannah

But first, he gives me a number. I have no anonymous calling option, yet, and I am reluctant to spend any dosh whatsoever on the lads in general (not to mention, I know my limitations, and I am crap on the phone...) anyway, so I will try to steer him toward email after getting this.

Quote:

Dear Mr. Hannah,
I spoke with Mr. Savimbi about making the said amount available to you. But before I do this, I will like to have a verbal conversation with you in relation to this aforementioned transaction. So if you can send me a contact number to reach you, I will appreciate it. I will look forward to your response.

Sincerely,
Mr. Jay Richardson.

N.B
My phone number is: 0044-7944450583. Please feel free to call anytime.

Here's Eric John's response to my letter of apology. Or appology. Or Appolonia. Whatever.

Quote:

Dear Hannah i hold my comment as for now, Mary Christmas and happy new year.

Eric John

[email protected] wrote:

I've been contacted once more by Mr. Savimbi in regard to collecting his
consignment, which you say you have with you, there at Gateway Security. Mr.
Savimbi insists that the two of you are genuine and that he has made
arrangements to get me the money necessary for me to collect the consignment
from you, to pay all the fees and taxes. If you are indeed, genuine, Mr. John,
I apologize for accusing you of being a liar and a scammer. However, I am
still very skeptical. We shall see whether Mr. Savimbi is telling the truth or
not. He says he has arranged for a loan of $75,000 in order to cover the
expenses.

Hannah Lanham

I try a new excuse as to why I can't accept a call from the financier.

Quote:

------ Original Message ------
Received: Tue, 14 Dec 2004 08:21:56 AM EST
From: jay richardson <[email protected]>
To: hannah <[email protected]>
Subject: Reply.

> Dear Mr. Hannah,

My name is Hannah Lanham. Ms. Hannah Lanham. Hannah is my first name. And it
is definitely FEMALE. Mr. Savimbi really should have told you that.

> I spoke with Mr. Savimbi about making the said amount
available to you. But before I do this, I will like to have a verbal
>conversation with you in relation to this aforementioned transaction. >So if
you can send me a contact number to reach you, I will appreciate >it. I will
look forward to your response.
>

Well, I can give you my home number, 206-666-3170, and I'm afraid I don't have
a mobile phone, but it won't do much good to call at the moment. I recently
had minor surgery to remove a small node from one of my vocal cords. It's
nothing really serious, but my voice is going to be shot for a few weeks,
according to the doctor. That's one reason among many I could really use the
money that would come to me for participating in this transaction. My health
insurance isn't going to cover a lot of the expense.

And I work as a flight attendant, so I am often away from home for extended
periods. And shortly, I may be going to visit relatives for the holidays. I
really prefer having my instructions in writing, if you don't mind. That way,
I can log onto my email from anywhere I may be and make sure I don't skip a
step. It's such an important transaction that I want to make sure I do
everything correctly. I'm a very visual person. It's easier for me to follow
instructions in writing.

Thanks,
Hannah Lanham

I had also laid the groundwork for getting a check sent to a PO box, should the opportunity arise. Sadly, it didn't.

Samuel, eager beaver, contacts me again. Somebody tell this boy to lay off the caffeine.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you today?Kindly update me of the position of things with the Security Company and the Financier,Mr. Richardson.And please always contact me through this address for security reasons;It appears someone is trying to get this transaction details.

Have a nice day,

Regards,

Samuel Savimbi.

Oh. Yeah, by the way, I also locked him out of his Yahoo account for 12 hours, for grins and giggles. That's why he decides someone is trying to get the details.

Jay is stil not playing ball via email.

Quote:

Hi Hannah,
Sorry I am just now responding to your letter, I have been out of town. Expect my call this evening. We will talk about the modalities of the whole thing when I call you. Have a nice day.

Sincerely,
Mr. Jay Richardson.

Sam again. Are you surprised?

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you?I called Mr. Eric John this morning and he told me that he got an email from you and that he was still waitng to hear from you to make Payments and come over for the Claim of the consignments;He also said that the office will be closing next week for Chrismas vacations.Please Hannah,I want you to urgently conclude arrangements with the Financier Mr. Richardson for him to release the money to you for the Claims,please be fast on this.

I urgently await your response.

Have a nice day.

Regards,

Samuel and Family.

Hannah again makes a gambit for email, since Jay didn't even leave a voicemail.

Quote:

I was at home most of the evening, but you didn't call, nor did you leave a
message. Would you be able to send me the necessary information via email,
instead?

Thanks,
Hannah

Keeping Samuel in the loop, so he doesn't wet himself.

Quote:

Mr. Richardson emailed me yesterday and told me he would be calling that
evening, but apparently he didn't. I was home most of the evening, and the
phone didn't ring, and I don't have any messages.

I emailed him today to see if he forgot.

Hannah

Jay tries to play impatient prick businessman. I'll give him two out of three on that score.

Quote:

Hi Hannah,
Something is obviously wrong with the number you
gave me. Is this the number you gave me (206 666
3170) ? Because I have been calling without getting
through. Send me another number, or give it to me
again correctly. I will expect a swift response to my
message. Have a good day.

Regards,
Mr. Jay Richardson.

No, dude! There's nothing wrong with my K7 number!

More fun locking Samuel out, and also, an ironic warning...

Quote:

DEAR HANNAH,

PLEASE NOTE;I HAVE JUST NOTICED THAT SOME ONE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET INTO MY MAILBOX TO FUSTRATE ALL MY EFFORTS TO GET ASSISTANCE FROM YOU;PLEASE KINDLY DISREGARD ANY OF SUCH UINSOLICITED EMAIL.

THANK YOU.

SAMUEL SAVIMBI.

Again, going for the email contact, not the phone. And how dare he cast aspersions on my perfectly good K7 number?

Quote:

> Hi Hannah,
> Something is obviously wrong with the number you
> gave me.

There is nothing wrong with the number.

Is this the number you gave me (206 666
> 3170) ?

That is the correct number. It's the only contact number I have.

>Because I have been calling without getting
> through. Send me another number, or give it to me
> again correctly. I will expect a swift response to my
> message. Have a good day.
>
> Regards,
> Mr. Jay Richardson.

As I've told Mr. Savimbi, and Mr. John, I am a flight attendant. I am often
away from home. When I am away or unable to pick up the phone, the voicemail
picks up, and you should be able to leave me a voicemail message. Mr. John has
never had any trouble getting through to that number, nor has Mr. Savimbi. In
fact, he seems to have left me a message very recently.

Hannah

More fun tweaking Samuel.

Quote:

>
> DEAR HANNAH,
>
> PLEASE NOTE;I HAVE JUST NOTICED THAT SOME ONE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET INTO
MY MAILBOX TO FUSTRATE ALL MY EFFORTS TO GET ASSISTANCE FROM YOU;PLEASE KINDLY
DISREGARD ANY OF SUCH UINSOLICITED EMAIL.
>

I don't understand what you mean. What mailbox? How do you knwo someone's been
trying to get into your mailbox? And what do you mean by uinsolicited mail?

Hannah

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 5:08 pm

And now, boys and girls, a lad explains possible "hacking"...

Quote:

Hannah,

I tried to get into my yahoo ID last few days,I could not and yahoo help now told me that someone has been trying to get into my yahoo emailbox;This prompted my last email to you.

Have you been able to finalise arrangements with the Financier Mr. Richardson?I called him and he said he will want you to establish a mobile telephone number,so he can have a talk with you before he can send you the money.Please it is important you contact him as soon as possible because we are runing out of time;Have you heard anything from Mr. Eric John of the Security Company?Always keep me posted please.I call your phone and left a message on your answering machine.

Have a nice day,

Regards,

Samuel Savimbi.

Here we go with that damned "Oh, just get a mobile!" line again.

The financier seems to be incapable of dialing a freaking U.S. number!

Quote:

Hello Hannah,
Again, I have tried to no avail to reach you via this number, and I have been unsuccessful each try. If you are interested in doing business with Mr. Savimbi, then establish a mobile or a more reliable number where I can reach you. Once you get the mobile number, give it to me. I will call you to arrange how and when you will get the funds. I will talk to you later. Have a nice day.

Sincerely,
Mr. Jay Richardson.

Oh, have a nice day, yourself.

Hannah is sympathetic, and has herself a whine about the uncooperative lad.

Quote:

>
> Hannah,
>
> I tried to get into my yahoo ID last few days,I could not and yahoo >help
now told me that someone has been trying to get into my yahoo >emailbox;This
prompted my last email to you.
>

That's awful. I hope no one's managed to get into your account.

> Have you been able to finalise arrangements with the Financier Mr.
>Richardson?I called him and he said he will want you to establish a >mobile
telephone number,so he can have a talk with you before he can >send you the
money.

He claims he can't get through to my number, but no one else has had any
problem, and he hasn't left me a voicemail. You were able to get through fine,
so I don't know why he's having a problem. And as I told you before, I can't
afford to get a mobile phone right now.

>Please it is important you contact him as soon as possible because we >are
runing out of time;Have you heard anything from Mr. Eric John of the >Security
Company?Always keep me posted please.I call your phone and left >a message on
your answering machine.

Mr. Eric John responded to my letter of apology, but I haven't heard from him
since. Which isn't surprising, seeing as I don't have any money to give him
for the consignment. I don't understand why Mr. Richardson won't even leave a
message or tell me what he wants in writing. I'm perfectly willing to follow
written instructions, and he seems unable to use voicemail, for some reason.

Hannah

Hannah pleads with the financier to just write. And politely calls him a bit of a numpty.

Quote:

> Hello Hannah,
> Again, I have tried to no avail to reach you via this number, and
I have been unsuccessful each try. If you are interested in doing business
with Mr. Savimbi, then establish a mobile or a more reliable number where I
can reach you. Once you get the mobile number, give it to me. I will call
you to arrange how and when you will get the funds. I will talk to you later.
Have a nice day.
>
>
Sincerely,
> Mr. Jay
Richardson.
>

I don't understand why you're having trouble reaching my number. Mr. Savimbi
had no trouble. He left me a message the same day you claimed you couldn't get
through. I am not a rich woman, Mr. Richardson. I can't afford to get a mobile
phone just for one person to call me.

Why not simply send me the instructions or information or tell me what you
want through email? It seems to me that would be much simpler, easier, and
waste less time than you constantly telling me you can't get through to my
number, and I would have your written instructions to refer back to. I'm
willing to do whatever it takes. I borrowed several thousand dollars on loans
in order to attempt this transfer earlier. Please, Mr. Richardson, just tell
me what I have to do. Write out the instructions, if necessary. Tell me what
information I have to give you and I'll email it back to you.

Hannah

Oh, thank goodness! Samuel hasn't been penetrated! I'm sure we're all relieved.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you?I do not think anyone has been able to penetrate into my Account;You are to do your best to get this loan from the Financier Mr. Richardson to enable you claim the consignment from the security company,please do not wait for him to call you because he is assisting us with the money to claim the consignment.
Hannah,please help us out of this our diplorable conditions we are facing here;I can not tell my mother the true position of things now otherwise she will die.Hannah,you can establish a mobile phone were the financier can always reach you and whatever it cost you to do that it will be paid back to you as soon as the money get to your safe Bank Account please.I and my family are trusting you to save us out from this situations facing us at the moment,please do not let us down to do something fast to help us.

God bless,

samuel and family.

I try to enlist Samuel in my fight to get Mr. Financier off the phone and into the inbox.

Quote:

Samuel, I'm copying Mr. Richardson on this reply.

------ Original Message ------
Received: Wed, 22 Dec 2004 05:42:10 AM EST
From: Samuel Savimbi <[email protected]>
To: [email protected]
Subject: Urgent message from samuel savimbi.

> Dear Hannah,
>
> How are you?

I'm still recovering from surgery to remove a node from my vocal cords. My
throat is still sore and my voice hasn't returned, but otherwise, I'm fairly
well.

>I do not think anyone has been able to penetrate into my Account;You are to
do your best to get this loan from the Financier Mr. Richardson to >enable you
claim the consignment from the security company,please do not >wait for him to
call you because he is assisting us with the money to >claim the consignment.

I am trying my best to get Mr. Richardson to tell me what I must do. He keeps
asking for another phone number, but I don't have one. I've given him the only
phone number I have, and he either can't or won't leave me a message. I've
already explained to him about the vocal cord surgery, and how I can't really
talk on the phone right now, but I'm not sure he understood or remembers my
earlier email where I explained this.

I've begged him over and over to please give me the instructions I need in
writing, over email, but he keeps saying he needs to speak to me on the phone.
I can't seem to make him understand that I do not have another phone number,
and even if he reaches me by phone right now, I have no voice to speak of.

> Hannah,please help us out of this our diplorable conditions we are facing
here;I can not tell my mother the true position of things now otherwise she
will die.Hannah,you can establish a mobile phone were the financier can always
reach you and whatever it cost you to do that it will be paid back to you as
soon as the money get to your safe Bank Account please.I and my family are
trusting you to save us out from this situations facing us at the
moment,please do not let us down to do something fast to help us.
>
> God bless,
>
> samuel and family.
>

I want to help, but I'm sure you understand that I can't spend money that I
don't have, even if it will be paid back to me. I cannot afford to get a
mobile phone. I am not a rich person. Getting a mobile phone costs money. I
have been off from work a great deal because of the surgery, and my medical
bills aren't all covered by insurance. I cannot afford signing up for a new
mobile phone right now. And as I've told Mr. Richardson, repeatedly, no one
else is having any problems getting through to my number. Other people have
gotten through to me with no problems. You left me a message with no problem,
Mr. Savimbi. I don't understand why Mr. Richardson refuses to put the
information in writing and email it to me, and instead chooses to keep
emailing me to demand another number.

Mr. Richardson, are you sure you're dialing 206-666-3170? Are you dialing the
necessary prefixes for a U.S. number? Please, as you can see, Mr. Savimbi is
desperate. I want to help, but I can't if you refuse to tell me what I need to
do in order to pay for the consignment. Please, I'm begging you, send me the
information.

Hannah
>

But what's he do? The heartless bastard dumps Hannah. And on Christmas, too.

Quote:

Dear Hannah,

How are you today?Happy Chrismas to you and your family;I am just knowing about your illhealth and I wish you a quick recovery.It is now very obvious to me that you won't be able to handle this transaction successfully because of your voice problem,it will be difficult for you to talk with the Security Company Officials even when you travel to claim the consignment and Mr. Richardson want to talk to whoever he is giving loan assistance;I have spoken with him severally on this.
So,I have decided on behalf of myself and my family to look out for someone who will be able to handle this transaction on our behalf;I regret any inconvinences this may cause you.Thanks for you time and your concern for my family,I hope to see you again.

May God Bless You.

Samuel Savimbi and Family.

Hannah gets in the last word, which isn't all that satisfying, but I do feel good in having wasted their time and money for a few weeks, and using this bait to get a bit more educated. It makes me long for an anonymous prepaid cell, (and the wit to actually talk to a lad convincintly, which isn't so easy...) so, maybe someday.

Anywho, Hannah leaves the door open, and fades away, without letting on that she's a baiter.

Quote:

> Dear Hannah,
>
> How are you today?Happy Chrismas to you and your family;I am just >knowing
about your illhealth and I wish you a quick recovery.

I told you about the operation weeks ago, when you first told me about Mr.
Richardson. Do you bother to read anything I send you?

>It is now very obvious to me that you won't be able to handle this
>transaction successfully because of your voice problem,it will be >difficult
for you to talk with the Security Company Officials even when >you travel to
claim the consignment and Mr. Richardson want to talk to >whoever he is giving
loan assistance;I have spoken with him severally on >this.

It's very obvious to me that you're the liar and fraud I thought you were the
first time around. You're only interested in me for what I can do for you, and
you don't give a damn about me or my family. You don't care that I lost all
that money in loan fees, trying to help you last time. I bet Mr. Richardson
wasn't going to loan you the money. You just told me that. I bet you were just
trying to get me to pay it for you again.

> So,I have decided on behalf of myself and my family to look out for >someone
who will be able to handle this transaction on our behalf;I >regret any
inconvinences this may cause you.Thanks for you time and your >concern for my
family,I hope to see you again.
>
> May God Bless You.
>
> Samuel Savimbi and Family.
>

You liar. You don't care about me at all. I still say, you haven't shown me
the slightest shred of proof that this "family" of yours even exists. I doubt
it does. I bet you're lying, Mr. Savimbi. I think you don't know how to tell
the truth. All you've done is left me with less than I had to begin with, a
bunch of wild stories, and the instant I have a health problem that prevents
me talking on the phone, you cut and run. I hope you're proud of yourself.
Maybe you deserve to be stuck there, you and your family, for the way you use
people then discard them when it becomes convenient.

Hannah

Annnnd that's it. Not the most exciting bait in the world, but proof that you can have some fun with a totally straight bait and cause the lad some grief. One of my straighter baits, really, and in retrospect, I'm sure there were some real missed opportunities, but not too shabby. It's also proof that you don't have to put a lot of effort in in the beginning, and you can build up stories as you go along. Also proof that you can call a spade a spade and never reveal you're a baiter.

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