How to get on a lad's nerves 101 (NSFW)

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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2018 10:25 pm

I was checking my spam inbox for interesting messages, and I saw this:

Quote:

Hi there,

Bulk mailing tools new packages available now, please check below packages list and do not hesitate to add my skype ID LJSANITARY1998 /Yahoo Messenger ID +8613857707871/ICQ UIN 727133429 for advice!

Plan 1: Unlimited SMTP server + licensed Turbo Mailer+ admin RDP/Price: $155/Monthly

Plan 2: Unlimited SMTP server installed web-based mailinig software/Price: $155/Monthly

( plan 2 no RDP and no turbo mailer/AMS/Sendblaster need)

Plan 3: Unlimited SMTP server /Price: $99/Monthly

(plan 3 include sender address/username/password/smtp server, need work with turbo mailer/AMS/Sendblaster etc...)

Plan 4: Unlimited web-mail

Roundcube webmail (bcc up to 1000 emails)price: $135/Monthly

Zimbra webmail (bcc up to 1000 emails)price: $155/Monthly

Plan5:admin RDP

1-below location admin RDP price: $35/Monthly

Canada/USA/Austria/Bulgaria/Czech/Denmark/Estonia/Finland/France/Germany/Ireland/Italy/Lithuania/Luxembourg/Netherlands/Norway/Poland/Romania/Russia/Serbia/Spain/Sweden/Switzer/Ukraine/UK

2-below locations admin RDP price: $45/Monthly

HongKong/China/Indian/Japan/Singapore/South Korea/Brazil/Colombia/Mexico/Indonesia/Israel/Malaysia/Pakistan/Taiwan/Thailand/Tureky/U.A.E/Vietnam/Australia/Egypt/New Zealand/Nigeria/South Africa

Plan 6: business/CEO & CFO/private email lead

1- business company email leads: $35 per 100k

2- CEO & CFO email leads: $50 per 100k

Please contact me for which country leads you need!

Plan 7: cpanel

1-bulletproof WHM + Cpanel/price: $55/Monthly

dedicated ip/host any page/ignore any complaints/client can create unlimited cpanel user accounts

2-normal cpanel/price: $35/Monthly

for normal usage/host legal page only/one cpanel user account

Plan 8: dedicated ip VPN/price: $35/Monthly

we have 52 countries ip avaiable for VPN, please contact me for which country ip you need!

Plan 9: email extractor/price: $155 with lifetime license

1- lifetime license/update to latest version any time

2- extract email by keywords or URL

3- extract email from targeted country

Plan 10: email verifier/price $135 with lifetime license

1- remove invalid emails/get better email performance

Payment we accept:

1- Perfect Money

2- Credit Card

3- Bitcoin

4- Western Union

5- Money Gram

6- Bank T/T

online marketing solutions ltd.

Whats app/Viber:+86-13857707871

Skype id: LJSANITARY1998

Yahoo Messenger id:+8613857707871

ICQ UIN:727133429

Email: [email protected]

I thought this was a good opportunity to practice my fake lad speak, so I responded:

Quote:

i need dis tool an new format to find maga. i poor an have little money to pay u, abeg u help me find good format bro.
one love

His response didn't give me much to work with, unfortunately:

Quote:

Hi
please add my skype id ljsanitary1998/yahoo messenger id +8613857707871/ICQ UIN 727133429
let us talk details there

I'm a bit too lazy to work with that, so let's stick with email:

Quote:

i no have money for much internet time at cafe, so let us talk here bro. no hackers here ok?
one love

Well, he didn't like that idea much:

Quote:

no ok

Time for plan B: insult the lad when you don't think the bait will progress further normally:

Quote:

mumu u no want use email. wash u mom toto because it smell bad. Go have sex with ewu. Abeg u work with me here.

He didn't like that much:

Quote:

poor *DELETED* animal, you should die early
you are really waste....,.
poor *DELETED*, go to do sex with your beast mother, that can save money
go to fuck your *DELETED* animal mother to death
your lower animal mother do sex with millions of ugly animals then born you, that why you are beast
so poor need die early, you are really waste

I may take some of that for my signature, but we'll see. I pressed more:

Quote:

u cafe SMALLBOI my oga will give you good format and pay u more, let u have good sex with ashawo. If u want take head out of anus, email [email protected] ok?
one love

He didn't like that idea either:

Quote:

*DELETED* animal never ok

I was running out of ideas for insults, so I took a bit of inspiration from here:

Quote:

when u stop sucking dick u will ROT IN HELL. thunder fire on u and u smelly mother who have sex with ewu. LORD ABOVE say cast out evil in Jesus name u are EVIL have sex with beast and smelly anus. FUCK U and thousand generation, u are satan and daughter of MERMAID. u are dead man u come to port harcourt u DEAD!
one love

For some reason, he didn't like that much either:

Quote:

*DELETED* animal, go to do your daydream!
really do not know why in world exist so ugly and low intelligence animal called *DELETED*. what a waste!

My latest email to him:

Quote:

u are *DELETED* animal u go back to village to fuck beast mother and her shrinky pussy and suck papa dick. he enjoy it because u give good sex. u only small cafe boi u give blowjob because u formats suck and u like swallow spam. JESUS cast out u evil since u are demon *DELETED* who have sex with ewu. u are demon *DELETED* who drink urine on commercial bus and fuck u mama toto. THUNDER smite u and u family!
one love

No more responses from him yet. I'll poke him a bit later with another account, and maybe I will send his address to a few other lads. We will see.

Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2018 10:56 pm

If you write to him again from another address, try this when/if things go pear-shaped:

Quote:

YOU MUST BE ASHAMED OF YOUR STUPID DEAD LIVING CORPSE, YOU ARE A STUPID NICAMPO AND ILLETRATE COMMON STREET THAWTH VERGABON, GO HANG YOUR SELF SOMEWHERE, YOU ARE THE WORST STUPID IDIOT ON THIS WHOLE WORLD, A TYPICAL ILLETRATE AND SENSELESS IDIOT

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