God has contacted me!

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 1:44 pm

Really, he has! Laughing

His username on tagged.com was actually God S., which prompted this first exchange.

Quote:

God: It's such a lovely profile you having in here Elise. how are you today?

Elise: I'm doing fine thanks. Certainly God isn't your real first name????
I'm hoping there is another first name I can call you?

God: Oh no lol!...Good to hear from you, am David 59yrs old divorced living in New York ready to relocate anywhere finding my special someone again. what do you like to do for fun ?

Elise: Thank goodness! lol Well, since I live in Florida, we have lots here that we can do for fun. I live on a lake and have a boat that I like to take out when it's nice out. I also like to go bike riding too. I live in an area that is not by any major roads so I can do that without getting run over by cars. I also like to cook and read - not at the same time, of course. lol
What do you like to do for fun?

God: this are the things i do for fun, I like listening to music, walking side by side with my special woman,i would like to know more about you if we have anything in common. what are your like and dislike?.
do you mind let's chat more through instant messenger on dave at yahoo dot com then see where it goes between us

Off to messenger and some of his funnier quotes:

Quote:

dave: Am fine and what you doing this morning?
elise: I'm playing hooky from work and staying at home doing work around the house. What are you doing today?
dave: I should be getting ready for work any moment from now
elise: Where do you work?
dave: I don't really play hooky but would like to learn someday, hope you'll be my teacher and I should be a very good student
dave: I own my business into sales of computers

Quote:

dave: Oh I see, I like to relocate to Florida hence my contacting u and have u ever dated anyone online before or in relationship with anyone through the internet before?
elise: I have contact with others on the net
dave: And how has it been chatting with those you've came across on the net any luck?
elise: I've met some nice people. What about you?
dave: I met a lady on the net and we started relationship later she told me about her sick mom and after I gave her $5,000 to treat her mom didn't hear from her again so I would say never a good luck anyway
elise: Ouch! I've heard about things like that happening. Sorry that it happened to you!
dave: It's okay I never let that to ruin my emotional feelings and happiness, this why am still in search for that very special woman to spend rest of time with forever based on friendship and see where it goes from there
dave: Have you ever had any kind of this experience on here before?
elise: If you mean people asking me for money, no I haven't. I don't know if I've been lucky or not...

elise: I have two sons, 35 and 37. They're married with kids of their own.
dave: Oh I see you're a grandma just like me....

dave: Do you live in an apartment or own your house bcos am planning buying a house of mine after when I retire soon
elise: I live in my own house and have for many years
dave: This are all the reason I like to relocate to Florida finding a house to purchase and with that very special woman I want to grow old with till the end of time Elise
dave: Okay, do you live alone in the house and would the kids accept me into the family?

dave: I guess having u in my life now my favorite meal will be German foods as we can both do the cooking together in the kitchen
dave: It was nice chatting with u as well Elise, take care and God bless. bye

dave: hello beautiful
elise: hi there
dave: oh you're always invisible darling....never knew you were online
elise: I forgot to reset it
dave: kindly please always show online to me so we can correspond at anytime am here
elise: was getting ready to leave anyway
when I think about it I will
I don't always think about it
dave: Okay, do reset it right now for us and to no one else
elise: I don't need to since we're talking
dave: Oh okay and are u running away for someone on here ?
elise: I told you why - what is your problem with it?
dave: Just asking and don't be angry with that
anyway, do you mind we talk more on the phone or through text and what's your number ?
elise: I don't do texting - that's for kids
and I don't give out my number to anyone I don't really know yet
I've had problems in the past
dave: Okay let me know when you ready to talk on the phone u hear ?
elise: I will
dave: watin u talk ?
elise: what?
dave: talk jare
elise: what?
dave: i hear o!
elise: what are you saying?
dave: let me know when you ready to talk on the phone
elise: I said I will
what is this other stuff that you were saying?
dave: Just don't know what's wrong with my keyboard
elise: sounds like you need a new keyboard

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:22 pm

Quote:

dave: I don't really play hooky but would like to learn someday, hope you'll be my teacher and I should be a very good student

It's so good to confuse them with words.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:26 pm

I had such a laugh when I read that. Didn't have the heart to set him straight though. Smile

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:57 pm

Street or ice?

Actually, the title of this thread cracked me up!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 3:41 pm

I have to admit that I had to look twice when I saw that I have a message from God S. Laughing

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 9:43 pm

The "hooky" comment cracked me up as well. I like how he mentioned he was scammed before. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Thu Dec 11, 2014 9:17 am

He really is a nasty piece of work. I was set to invisible on messenger yesterday since I was watching a webinar and he said "hello Elise". I said hello back then he tried to voice call. I didn't answer and he came back madder than hell as to why I didn't answer. I explained that I was attending a webinar and didn't want to interrupt it. He demanded a cell phone number so that he could text or call her and she said no. He quit talking and logged out. So Elise sent him a "I guess you don't have any interest in furthering this relationship so I wish you well" type of message. Will be interesting to see if he comes back on that.

Posted: Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:44 pm

He was acting stranger than usual so Elise wanted to push him a bit. She sent him a "Dear John"...

You know, I get a feeling that this isn't going to work. You don't seem to be interested so I think it's best that we just say goodbye and you continue your search for whoever you're looking for.
So I wish you well
goodbye

And, all of a sudden:

Quote:

am fine darling, what you doing today ?
am here just busy with work and wanna ask how close are you to Everence Credit Union ?
this is an account you can open online then get back to me with details to proceed with the payment
<ding>
https://www.everence.com
http://www.depositaccounts.com/banks/locations/everence-credit-union.html
https://www.everence.com/banking/showitem.aspx?id=10136&token=1
elise: what are you talking about??
Why would I want to open an account at a credit union when I already to my banking here?
What payment are you talking about?
Are you on drugs or something?
dave: U there Elise
elise: I've just gotten home from going out with friends. Please explain the crap you sent me earlier...
dave: What crap?

At this point, I'm hearing the theme song of The Twilight Zone in the background....

Quote:

dave: There is a client of mine that is well related with the bank and has already instructed his accountant to make to me through this bank
I would have asked it should be sent into my account but am related with First Convenience bank and my account is on mortgage for the house am about to buy and business
elise: I don't know what you are talking about
dave: Remember am into sales of computers?
elise: that much you told me yes
dave: I supplied the client sometime ago but he's not around now and has instructed his account to make my payment through this bank and by transfer of funds to the account setup
elise: so?
that has nothing to do with me
dave: Do you understand now?
elise: this has nothing to do with me
but no I don't understand it
nor does it have anything to do with me
dave: I would want us to work this out together for you receiving the payment by settling up account maybe online with the name of bank given
elise: no sorry i'm not setting up any account for you
that's your company and your problem
dave: Elise, right now am in need of funds or can you be able to loan me something to finish up my business?
Yes am about to supply goods to the British american tobacco company worth of millions of dollars which I've already been purchased
elise: if you've already purchased it then why do you need money?
dave: I could show you documents to view but the goods needs to be ship-out now from the manufacturing there in South Korea to the British american tobacco in the UK
elise: if you've already purchased it then why do you need money?
so send me the documents via email
dave: I need to complete the funds with me now for the clearance of goods for the consignment to be delivered then for my payment
elise: so send me the documents via email
dave: accept the file
that's my business document
elise: I don't accept stuff like this on here. I had someone send me a virus. Please send it to my email: [email protected]
dave: ok
What just needed right now is just $1,120 to complete the fees with me
elise: I just got the documents but I can't use any of those instant money places. Sorry
dave: Okay and how can you assist me with this now Elise ?
I hope you got part of the documents which am ready to make a written agreement to pay you back with interest even in double ones i get this supply done and sorted out
elise: Do they have a bank account that you can send me and I can transfer the funds?
dave: how can you transfer the funds honey?
what bank you banking with and can you make a cash deposit or sending the funds through Walmart ?
elise: no I can't
I will only transfer money to a bank account
no instant money places
they're not safe
dave: it's very safe and that's the prefer way the custom official want to receive the money...
Please if you really want to assist me for this to be done honey, kindly get it sent through Western Union or Money Gram location agents nearest to you
elise: I'm sorry I can't help you then
dave: do you have a pen and paper so i can write you the sending information Elise or maybe you call me on 518 xxxx then i can say it to you on the phone
elise: you can send the bank info on here
dave: can you be able to make the transfer right now if you get a bank infos ?
elise: the bank is closed on Sunday's
but I can send the info to my banker and he will transfer it
dave: How much can you be able to assist me for a loan honey ?
elise: I can send you what you mentioned you need
dave: can your banker make the transfer today ?
elise: I just told you that the bank is closed on sunday
dave: Yes i understand but can you try to ask someone to get this funds sent for you Elise ?
elise: My banker will send the funds to a bank account when I send him the information
dave: Okay darling, please i want you to keep my documents i sent you safe bcos that's my life and investment which i want us to get it supplied soon to the company get paid and happy forever Ok?
elise: ok
Are you able to send me a bank account?
dave: Yes but not thinking the bank account will delay?
elise: it may but I will not send via instant money places
sorry
dave: I've another suggestion which we can also try now honey!
elise: what?
dave: I guess you don't want to use your name in sending funds through instant money places right ?
elise: I will not use instant money places
that is not a choice here
are you there?
dave: You could use any other name instead or asking someone to do the sending for us Elise...i really want us to get this done fast
dave: It's okay i understand and your wish is my commands honey...
elise: I will not let someone else possibly else under investigation. And they require identification for sending money so i have to use my name
dave: how much do you want back in return ones i get this good supplied and get paid honey ?
elise: just what I give you
dave: Okay and can you be able to loan me something little higher like making it $5000 so i can have a pocket money while as the goods is yet to be delivered honey ?
elise: I guesss so
dave: How do you mean you guess so darling ?
elise: Just what I said....
dave: Is that a promise ?
elise: I said I would
dave: with 5,000 i would be able to pay you back 7000

He sends a bank account...

Quote:

dave: Okay darling and when would your banker gets back to you honey bcos i really want this supply to be done as soon as possible ?
elise: When he reads the email he'll go ahead and transfer the money
He always does it for me
dave: Kindly try and call him now on the phone to make it done immediately
elise: I'm not going to call and bother him. it will get done
dave: Oh okay, i will really appreciate it darling bcos i've already told the custom officer that the payment will be sent to his wife's account and will get back to him ones it done
dave: How you feeling today and how is work going honey ?
elise: ok dear. I have to get going as I have a meeting in 10 minutes. I'm doing great but really busy.
dave: I see. what did u eat for lunch honey ?
elise: I had a quiche for lunch.
dave: I know you're really busy today but i understand and please don't stress yourself too much dear
elise: I won't dear. Just part of the job though.
dave: I can't wait to meet and be with you soon darling and spending time together for Christmas will be the greatest thing that has ever happens to me
elise: I can't wait to meet either.
dave: I think we can invest together into a business after i get this supply done and get paid...i think you're of a good business lady
elise: We would make a great team!
dave: for me dropping 1Million US dollars would go a long way for business and hope we can invest on it well together
remember the worth of my supply is 1.8 honey and hope you saw that in the documents sent to your email ?
elise: Yes I did dear.
What type of business would you like to invest in?
dave: Good. when do you think the custom's wife could get the funds available in her account honey ?
elise: It could take a few days for her to see it.
dave: am thinking of investing into collectibles having a store like where we could sell jewelries, shoes, bags and others
elise: sounds like a good idea. I really have to be going as the meeting will be starting in a few minutes. I'll update you on the transfer tomorrow. Sending hugs and kisses.
dave: why can't you just ask the banker to issue her a wire check to the address ?

Hi tagged.com id: http://www.tagged.com/profile.html?uid=6020397535

Feel free to cause more pain! Twisted Evil

Posted: Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:58 pm

In case you wanted to know what god looked like:

Somehow, I thought he'd have a beard, long hair and flowing cape.

And his documents.

Posted: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:37 am

A British American Tabaco company? Evil Lol

Quote:

Somehow, I thought he'd have a beard, long hair and flowing cape.

You're thinking of His son, the hippy, Jesus.

Posted: Sun Dec 21, 2014 8:34 pm

Oh, how right you are! Guess my agnosticism is showing. Laughing

Anyway, God is pissed with me that the money didn't come and went on a rant. He blocked me off of messenger before I could save it for all time. But, short version, I was a liar, pig, idiot, useless white woman, liar (did I say that already?)...you get the drift. The usual rant.

So I guess I'm going to hell in a handbasket. Smile

His account is still on tagged if anyone wants to take a poke at him. He needs more loving!

Posted: Sun Dec 21, 2014 8:38 pm

Did he really say "useless white woman"? Lmao...Louisa has sent him a gentle poke on Tagged Smile

Let's hope he will like my profile.....and I am sure he will learn to like Agent Salami

Posted: Sun Dec 21, 2014 8:50 pm

He certainly did! I hope he like Louisa! Smile

Posted: Sun Dec 21, 2014 9:02 pm

coffinsurfer wrote:

He certainly did! Smile

What a prick.....he should be up for a massbait in return Cool

ETA: he has replied and asked for my mail address. We are getting started.

Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 10:21 am

Hello David, good evening, how are you tonight? I was just wondering whether you might like to email me, because I like what I see in your profile, you seem to be a very serious person. Kind regards from Berlin/Germany

Quote:

Good to hear from you, am David Richards 59yrs old divorced living in New York ready to relocate anywhere finding my soul-mate. what do you like to do for fun?

Quote:

let's chat more through instant messenger on daverich_58 at yahoo dot com. what's your email ID?

Hello, thank you very much for your answer, but what is a messenger, please? I don't think I have that. My email address is [email protected].
I am looking forward to reading your letter! Have a great evening, good night!

Quote:

Hey, how are you doing this weekend? it was nice reading your letter...

I am doing good, how about you?

Quote:

do u mind let's chat through instant messenger on : daverich_58 at yah00 dot com

What is a messenger, please? I prefer to write emails, and I have already given you my email address, but you haven't written any single line to me, so are you really interested in getting any closer?

No email yet......I hope he will stay around for a bit.

Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2014 11:07 am

Go get 'em!! Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2015 7:07 am

He's back again....after I had to poke him gently. Now I am waiting for his email

Happy New Year, all the best wishes from here Smile

Quote:

what your email ?

[email protected]

He's not really a friend of email, and he doesn't seem to be a man of many words either. We will see how it goes.
This is his profile on Tagged: http://www.tagged.com/profile.html?uid=6020397535

Quote:

Gesendet: Mittwoch, 14. Januar 2015 um 00:21 Uhr
Von: "Dave Rich" <[email protected]>
Betreff: Hello

This is David from tagged, i hope you get this!

Hello David,

yes I have got it, thank you!
How are you today? I was actually not doing too good, I had a horrible migraine, so I got up to get some painkillers, and I found your message.
I would love to hear from you again and get to know you a little better!
Kind regards

Quote:

Gesendet: Mittwoch, 14. Januar 2015 um 05:14 Uhr
Von: "Dave Rich" <[email protected]>

Betreff: Re: Aw: Hello
Good to hear from you Louisa, how are you feeling now and hope better. what else do you like to know more about me?...kindly write me when you're doing okay. take care and God bless u

What else do I want to know? He might not be quite aware of the fact that I know nothing at all

Good morning Dave,

oh wow, good to hear from you, too! I am feeling much better after I took 2 Aspirin and poured them down with a double Jägermeister, that does the trick most of the times. Thank you for your concern, it is nice to know that there is someone who cares!
What else do I want to know about you? Oh Dave, there are so many things I want to know about you, I don't even know where to start,
I have so many questions!
The most important thing of all is: are you married or in an ongoing relationship, or are you seriously looking for a new partner? I have received many messages on Tagged from men who were only pretending they were divorced or single, and mostly I just found out by chance, like if they would refuse to give me their landline or cell phone number, because they were fearing that their girlfriends/wives might catch them in the act, and this is something I do not like at all. Your profile says "divorced", so I hope you are telling the truth here?
I like your picture a lot, and I also like that you are some 9 years older than me, I like mature men, because they have so much life experience and knowledge and superiourity, if you know what I mean.
What are your likes and dislikes, and what is most important of all to you when you consider a new relationship?
What is your job, are you self-emploited, or do you work for a company? What are your hobbies and interests, and what do you like to do in your leisure time?
I am looking forward to your next message, and I am very happy that we have met!
Have a great day, and take care!

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:27 am

"God" in his infinite greatness has finally replied to me

Quote:

Gesendet: Donnerstag, 15. Januar 2015 um 15:48 Uhr
Von: "Dave Rich" <[email protected]>
Betreff: Re: Aw: Re: Hello

Good to hear from you again Louisa,
am divorced with 32 yrs old son named Micheal living with my ex, am the only child of my parent dad was a British but my mom still alive stays in Madrid Spain while am nationalized here in the United States. I want you to know that I am not here for a one night relationship but someone i would be able to spend the rest of my life with till the end of time, are you caring and truthful?...I got divorced three yrs ago because my ex was messing around sleeping with my friend which really hurt me so much but life has to continue, its so bad at this age to find our self lonely, that's why am looking for someone to spend rest of my life with forever.

I like listening to music, walking side by side with my special woman,i would like to know more about you if we have anything in common.
I hate people that tell lies a lot, people that are playing on other people hearts for games/fun. The reason why i am on this dating site is because i am lonely and searching for a long term relationship, some times people select there love with age which i believe its just a number, all that l want is a woman that will make me happy for the rest of my life because life too short and need to enjoy it to the fullest.

I own my business into sales of computers and distribution of industrial machines to companies. what do you do for living?...I like shopping,painting,comfort and writing poems..am a good cook, my best food is BBQ and Coffee with milk you can see i love food a lot...(Lol). from my own perspective am looking for a friend to see where it goes from there. what about you??

Hello Dave,

sorry for my late replay, but I was traveling and did not have any access to my email. I am back home now in Berlin, and I will have to get back to work tomorrow, and as I am very busy with my work, I will not be able to write to you on a daily basis, I hope this will not be a problem? I am self-employed, I run a small, but very successful catering service, and I am proud to state that I even deliver my food creations to the Deutsche Bundestag on a regular basis. Those orders do not really pay off well, but it is good to have them, just for the reputation of the business. My best seller is the famous German Mett-Igel, foreigners wouldn't know what that is at all, so I have attached a picture, so that you know what I am talking about.
Oh dear, I am sorry to hear that your marriage went down the drain because your wife was cheating on you! And your background is so unbelievably exotic, a British dad and a Spanish mom......I am sorry that I cannot come up with something only half as thrilling as that!
My dad had Polish roots, that might explains my maiden name, which is Pryzewalski, so I was quite happy when I met a man who married me at the age of 25, so I became Mrs van der Valk, that was surely a change for good! But it didn't last very long, he had an immeasurably grand appetite for underaged girls, and it was only inevitable that he was caught one fine day, and he was convicted and went to jail, that was when I filed for an emergency divorce, which was of course granted by the judge, who was pretty much in my favour during the whole trial.
I like listening to music, too, and of course I like to hold hands, and I like photography and animals, and I like blackberries. Do you like blackberries, too?
I am longing to hear back from you!

Warm regards

Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2015 12:09 pm

Quote:

Gesendet: Montag, 19. Januar 2015 um 00:20 Uhr
Von: "Dave Rich" <[email protected]>
Betreff: Re: Aw: Re: Re: Hello

Good morning Louisa,

I'm so thankful that I've met you and I really love to see your cute face someday . I really love to see you smiling, because when i spoke to you on messenger yesterday, ??? we certainly did NOT speak on messenger! i feel relaxed chatting with you. If you were just to give me one chance, I could show you that it could be amazing being more than friendship. I don't want to hurt you like you have been hurt in the past. I just want you to take a risk and see how good it would feel knowing each other. taking risks! I could make you so happy. There's more to life than just sitting around waiting for something to happen; life will then just pass us by.

I do cherish your friendship, like we have shared conversations about our lives, our families that I would never with anyone else. The main reason for that is because I like you. I can say that I have had some of the most wonderful times with you that I have ever had in my entire life. when you talk I hold onto every word that comes out from you and it's like they are engraved in the back of my mind forever. I can't answer why you have that affect on me; maybe it's the fact that we have become such good friends or destined to be together.

Hope to read more from you and let's see where it goes from there Beautiful. God bless

David Richards

Hello Dave,

oh, thank you so much for your message and your wonderful, heartwarming words, I feel ever so comfortable when communicating with you! That is why I prefer mature men like you, and I am very happy that I can consider myself so lucky, having made your aquaintance!
I am very busy with my job these days, so I don't have too much time left to sit at my desk and be online, I do hope you will understand. Dave, thank you so much for letting me know that you are not going to hurt me, because I don't want that ever to happen again!
What are you doing today, what are your plans? And what do you think....when will there be a possibility to see each other in person?
I would love to meet you face to face.....for a cup of coffee, a long walk and an even longer talk!