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TheDane
Baiting Guru
Joined: 13 Aug 2010
Posts: 5194
Location: Meanwhile, somewhere else...
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Posted:
Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:16 am |
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This quote isn't exactly new - but I still like it. It's from the initial chat with one of my very special lads, Schmuck/Al-abgari.
Quote: |
Al-abgari: i am really surfering since the war
me: Yeah, me too, oil prices has sky rocketed, and I can't go to town because it is too expensive. |
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_________________ x122 x3 x2 x2 x13
Trafalgar Square 2013
Goat Milk Lad 2012-13:
Lagos-Ouagadougou-Arbinda Warri-Yaoundé
I AM A FOOL AND I AM SO DISAPPOINTED - Brother Okei AKA Goat Milk Lad
I do not wish my enemy what I have experienced and this humiliation you are putting me through - Rushforth (on behalf of Dharma & Dr Mike) |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Tue Apr 23, 2013 12:38 pm |
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Small boi foooooool wouldn't stop sending the basic WU details plus send me the MTCN letter, so I supplied some info:
Quote: |
Receiver Name................ A. Total Fuckwit
Country.............Benin Republic
City...............Cotonuo
Text Question.........How Big Is My Penis
Answer...........Tiny
Amount..........$.40usd |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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YKnott
Master Baiter
Joined: 04 Mar 2013
Posts: 172
Location: seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin research kitchen
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Posted:
Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:17 pm |
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I have a Vlad that sticks to script like his life depends on it, so I sent him a section from my vacuum cleaner manual yesterday ;
Quote: |
Keep the cord away from heated surfaces. Do not handle the plug or vacuum cleaner with wet hands. Do not use outdoors or on wet surfaces. Do not put any objects into openings. Do not use with any openings blocked and do not restrict airflow. Keep all openings free of dust, lint, hair or anything that might reduce airflow. Keep hair, loose clothing, fingers and all parts of the body away from openings and moving parts. Do not pick up hot coals, cigarette butts, matches or any hot, smoking or burning objects. Do not pick up flammable or combustible materials (lighter fluid, petrol, kerosene etc.) |
Todays reply ;
Quote: |
Hello dear !
I feel very excited our correspondence continues!
Thank you a lot for your letter. . . . . . |
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_________________ |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Wed Apr 24, 2013 1:33 pm |
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This one is rather humorous only if you are familiar with Broadway musicals and/or movie musicals.
Quote: |
Who am I?
My soul belongs to God, I know
I made that bargain long ago
He gave me hope, when hope was gone
He game me strength to journey on
Who am I? I'm Gene Valjean. |
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_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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YKnott
Master Baiter
Joined: 04 Mar 2013
Posts: 172
Location: seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin research kitchen
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Posted:
Wed Apr 24, 2013 2:01 pm |
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After ScriptVlads positively romantic reponse to my vacuum cleaner manual yesterday, I followed it up with an excerpt from the Health & Safety at Work Act . . .
Quote: |
All gas cylinders should be fitted with appropriate regulators and pressure gauges. Regulators for fuel gases and oxygen are designed to be non-interchangeable. Regulators for acetylene and propane are marked with details of the duties for which they are suitable. Acetylene and propane and regulators should not be interchanged. |
Todays reply . . .
Quote: |
My sweet ! , hi again!!! You can't imagine how happy I am when i
get a letter . . . . |
(Yeah, Government legislation gets me all romantic too !)
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vonpaso xlura
Baiting Guru
Joined: 10 Apr 2011
Posts: 13781
Location: Bertcad, Lojbanistan
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Posted:
Thu Apr 25, 2013 4:09 pm |
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To a lad trying to buy diffraction grates:
Quote: |
I will get around to this, but a customer asked me to make a large number of bezels for interocitors, and my machines are running full tilt, so it will take me a few days. Meanwhile, what type, size, and ruling spacing of grates would you like? Would you like them blazoned; if so, with what blazon angle or for what wavelength? I need at least the type and size to compute the price. |
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_________________ ×12 ×3 ×3
unwashed
×163
×186
Accra - SH Cotonou
you are a fake people so do not ever write to me again.
Am mad at you right now ... Am tired of your questions ... Am sick and tire you and your bank
Nigerian pig . go swallow a grenade idiot. Boko Haram will solve your problem idiot .
you are big fool by send a fake payment information and never you contact me again asshole .
your passgae bearing your ATM CATD ... Ant Terrorist Certificate ... legal verterbrate ... expartiate your meaning ... gets to your dwaignted address ... successful ofghw transfer |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Thu Apr 25, 2013 9:17 pm |
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Cammy got a message from the British High Commission about her Visa Card with an alternate address to contact. The sender included a photo of "herself" that wasn't exactly... flattering.
So Cammy, being a devout Freyjan who is supposed to associate only with beautiful people, wrote:
Quote: |
I was going to ask Ms Nibbs for an explanation, but since she's so ugly I'll have to ask you to clear things up; please explain then. |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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CryHavoc
Baiting Guru
Joined: 28 Feb 2013
Posts: 3152
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Posted:
Wed May 01, 2013 6:53 am |
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To Chinese lotto lad on why I need a third piggy from him
Quote: |
I regret to tell you that I spent all day yesterday at my bank. It seems that their head office declined to send the funds because I'm sending your payment to a Communist country! Now I am being investigated as a possible Communist! Ridiculous I know, but I wonder if their is an account not in China I can send the money too? |
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_________________ x108
Rame Head 2013
Trafalgar Square 2013
Rushforth the lame (with Dharma, Dr Mike and TheDane) "I am a stranger in this land and you know what animals are doing to humans in that zone"
London - Berwick
"You are mentally ill, You would need some physician." Dr Bar. Destiny Moon Principal Partner. (Esq.) Moon Chambers & Assoc.
"God be with you for playing around my brain" Tina Jasmine
"God purnish u ad ur juju man una go die 4 motor accident" Mr Well Paulson |
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CryHavoc
Baiting Guru
Joined: 28 Feb 2013
Posts: 3152
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Posted:
Thu May 09, 2013 8:33 am |
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Lotto lad bank protecting piggy
Quote: |
Listen Mr, you have to follow our own procedures okay?? just like other 19 lucky winners did as well.. we don't know why you keep taking us for granted here or do you think you are the only winner which the honorable Facebook company re fair to us for a bank transfer?? we have told you it is against the rules, you can't make a transfer because this is not a personal transaction, so proceed with the Money Gram in sending the fee okay? |
Bit annoyed I replied
Quote: |
Sir,
Please do not take that tone with me. I am being civil, the least you can do is be same. I have no problem paying the fee, what I do have a problem with is the way you wish it to be paid. You are a bank. Therefore I would assume you have a bank account I could pay your fee into. Please stop me if I'm confusing you. Therefore you send me the account details and I put money from my account into yours and I can collect my winnings. Simple isn't it? Then we are all happy. |
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_________________ x108
Rame Head 2013
Trafalgar Square 2013
Rushforth the lame (with Dharma, Dr Mike and TheDane) "I am a stranger in this land and you know what animals are doing to humans in that zone"
London - Berwick
"You are mentally ill, You would need some physician." Dr Bar. Destiny Moon Principal Partner. (Esq.) Moon Chambers & Assoc.
"God be with you for playing around my brain" Tina Jasmine
"God purnish u ad ur juju man una go die 4 motor accident" Mr Well Paulson |
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5727
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Posted:
Thu May 09, 2013 2:00 pm |
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I got tired of my lad sending me pictures of "herself" taken from a modeling website
My child I do have a request of you though. Please stop sending me pictures that you have taken off of a modeling website. I know these pictures are not of you. My child, I understand that you have been through quiet a bit of pain, and I will help you and love you no matter how ugly you are. Do you understand? Remember that God has a plan for all of us, and in the end we all get what we deserve. So, my child, no more lying to me about how you look. I understand that the time spent in the refugee camp has probably ravished your appearance, and you do not need to make me think you are a model. It does not matter to me, as I think you are as strong beautiful woman no matter how ugly you really are.[/i] |
_________________ x8 < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.
i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
x5 Team Humphere
Long Live Silver Peak Orphanage! - Loan Lad Langwenya Andile |
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Kokomeister
Baiting Guru
Joined: 10 Sep 2008
Posts: 3001
Location: Wandering around the world with a sense of adventure!
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Posted:
Thu May 09, 2013 3:41 pm |
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Scathingly making the lad feel inferior, Daniel wrote: |
Joel,
You are like rose that revealed its thorns and as you pricked my finger so then you became a prick yourself. You are such a little incompetent, unprofessional, disgusting fecal infant who could not find his way out of the toilet. You are pathetically eucalyptical and nobody really can be around you for more than a couple seconds because you act like you are about to erupt a bloody mess everywhere. Doing business with you is like throwing goats at skyscrapers. It's awful either way you look at it. You act like a small child throwing a tantrum because they did not get the thing that they asked Santa to bring to them. You are talk and no follow through.
If this keeps up I will find a business man more suited for the job then you would ever dream to be. I will be paying him €50,000 per day and he is more willing to get the job done right. My investment and contract with you has been terminated. I have a serious problem with you and your stupidity that seems to be growing like boner. You just don't know when to stop until you burst. So why the fuck should I even consider a bastard child like you to even consider being an international business partner. And to think that I was about to sponsor you a visa to Los Angeles, California but luckily I have moved back to Belgium cutting off my loose ends, including you. Or better yet, there is a cat that can do your job for much cheaper more efficiency than you'll ever have. You're just a little toy waiting to be crushed by a trash compactor.
By the way, do me a favour, go fuck yourself royally and in the ass!
Your best-friend,
Daniel Tosser |
I remember laughing so hard after writing this but he was so much fun to "intellectually" slap, I couldn't help it. |
_________________ red head gangster (Emma the Tropical Herbalist)
YOU ARE PLAYING WITH MY LIFE ADVENTURE (Joel Desire)
YOU ARE SUCH A BIG SICKNESS THAT STEP ON ME! (Joel Desire)
YOU ARE TOO SMALL, GO AHEAD WITH WHATEVER YOU THINK OR IMAGINED THAT YOU CAN DO TO ME, ONCE YOU TRY ONCE YOU WILL DIE HARD. YOU BETTER DON'T TRY ME AT ALL YOU FOOL- Mariam Abacha (6 months)
<a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=232044">[Current ongoing bait]</a>
<a href="/forum/donate.php">[Exclusive prizes]</a>
x17
Auntie Tina- Lagos-Parakou-Tanguieta-Niamey-Tera-Mallanville-Lagos "well the story you read in children's fairytale story book when you are young is not the same as what is happing now." |
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next victim
Baiting Guru
Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Posts: 21158
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Posted:
Sun May 12, 2013 6:20 pm |
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Just because I felt like it one of my galpals got this.
I think I must just come right out and admit it. I think your pillow and I may have had unprotected sex, maybe even without her permission. If I start seeing little throw pillows around the house I am in trouble. Please don't be mad, I don't love her!
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_________________ 291+ x 78+ http://yahoonews01.zxq.net/
500 in 6 - 36 pink 11 black
Chairman's Xmas Parti 2012
Hana, Flip It, G spot, Rosy, Cynthia
- web store
Just read the posting on Eater. You are one sick motherf****r! -Alan
"The skull with bunny ears was a good enough warning" - Nailgunner
mentors- http://forum.419eater.com/forum/cherrie_mentor_program.php
This Derick moral monster! From http:/ /scamnewss.wordpress.com/2011/10/14/derrick-ratt-scammer-beware/ Vlad blog
http://tinyurl.com/btf7872 - Toolbox |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Sun May 12, 2013 11:28 pm |
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Chief Hon Mohamed Fisher is so worried about Cammy getting the money she's owed, but Cammy has another concern:
Quote: |
Oh, and I'd like to suggest that you shave off that porn star moustache. |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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oscarpiles
#1 Moderator
Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6776
Location: Sec tarnfuseslking with Fae and she co
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Posted:
Mon May 13, 2013 1:00 am |
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Hot off the Presses:
Raven:
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can you send the western union today |
TruckerMals:
Quote: |
I can't go out now cause I got a Bun in the Oven. |
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_________________ DON'T BE A SQUARE DONATE
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Tue May 21, 2013 9:09 am |
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Even though Peter Ofori, the General Managing Director, of International Commercial Bank PLC of Ghana, wants to give Cammy $5.7 million, she has her standards.
Quote: |
Thanx for writing, but could you get someone else to handle this? You are really very homely and Freyja says that I should only associate with beautiful people. |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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Rowan
Elite Baiter
Joined: 15 Feb 2013
Posts: 1348
Location: In the back room, being naughty
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Posted:
Fri May 24, 2013 3:27 am |
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I got this:
Quote: |
Din brevlåda har överskridit det lagringsutrymme som anges av administratören och du kommer inte att kunna ta emot nya meddelanden förrän du återaktiverar den. Att validera -> Kopiera eller klicka här http://www.phisingsiteredacted.com |
But I don't speak Swedish, so I wrote this back:
Quote: |
Sorry, I don't speak foreign. Have a great day! |
Translated it's a phishing scam. I apparently have used up all my email storage space and need to re-enable my email account through the address provided. |
_________________ x 134 known, lost count since then -- thanks to Dharma for this one.
x 188
A.Z. 2013-2015
"If You can't figure out the scanner find someone smart to do it ok?"
"KISS YOUR INHERITANCE GOOD BYT DUMP ASS"
"its [wo]men like you who truly ruin my days."
"Do you realize that you have pushed me to tears?"
"I pray you die of horrible disease in Jesus name for wasting my time. The is serious business." |
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Mortal
Baiting Guru
Joined: 02 Jul 2009
Posts: 3473
Location: Smarter than your smartphone™
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Posted:
Fri May 24, 2013 7:07 am |
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Quote: |
Dear Lad,
My name is not
I am not changing your name either and if this is important deal you have to keep my name 100% correct OK?!
Best regards,
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_________________ x87 x5
Ugly Duckling with Mountain Goat and Osazee : Cameroon -> Nigeria
Paul with Just Cold: Benin -> Lagos -> Abuja
George: Accra -> Togo I really want to do business with you, because i know you are an Angel send to rescue me by God.
x6
GOD PUNISH YOU, GOD PUNISH YOU, GOD PUNISH YOU. Mr. Olisa
Every night a phonecall from you, you talk rubbish. Mr. Olisa
Juan's hidden fries! |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Sun May 26, 2013 1:50 pm |
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Cammy has been more than slightly surly with Bob Mueller and a WU guy:
Quote: |
I don't give a fuck what your government and the fucking IMF have signed, stamped and wiped their asses with. Mueller owes me that DIST and I want it before anything else. |
Quote: |
Nicu told me that B0laji has the brains of a retarded turnip. Be grateful he never spoke to you. |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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rattlesnake
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 30 Mar 2012
Posts: 949
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Posted:
Wed May 29, 2013 6:05 am |
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Lad sent me an email with the subject line of "Honorable Beneficiary, Are You Alive?"
To which I had to reply:
Quote: |
[lad],
I regret to inform you that I died on March 27, 2013. As a result I
have little use for worldly riches. However, my living relatives may
wish to have some of the money. If you'd like, I can serve as an
intermediary and make sure the money goes to the proper recipients.
Eternally yours,
The Ghost of [me] |
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_________________ x59 x5
The Chairman's Xmas Parti 2012 Lagos-Natitingou w/Team Sley
'WE ARE STILL WAITING'
'i hate the fact that i come online everyday to send you emails and all i get is disappointment every time' - Silk
'keep your money ok. we dont need it. have a bless day' - Barrister Douglas Brown
'YOU ARE A BASTARD AND A FOOL' - Dr. Ugo Peters
'I WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT THE MAN IN THE WESTERN UNION IS A CRIMINAL AND A LOW LIFE CHEAT' - Dr. Ugo Peters
'tell your stupid prostitute step dauther never to play with the tail of a tigger' - Capt. Anita George (US Army) |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Wed May 29, 2013 9:14 pm |
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On being told to send money to "Ani Peter" in Benin, Cammy got surly:
Quote: |
I'm not going to send a fucking cent to Anal Peters and that's all that counts. |
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_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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Rowan
Elite Baiter
Joined: 15 Feb 2013
Posts: 1348
Location: In the back room, being naughty
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Posted:
Thu Jun 06, 2013 7:44 pm |
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I've had this lad sending me a version of the old widow who wants to give away her riches before she dies scam every single day for week. Since he's going to be an eager little lad, I decided to send him a wall o' text about my own family dramas just to see what happens.
Quote: |
Good day. How are you doing? You know, I have some of my own problems. My dad just died. He was a really rich man, too. He was the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. Unfortunately he invested all his money in some shithole country in the middle of fucking nowhere it's now all tied up with corrupt bureaucrats who want a piece of the $200 million he's left me and my brother. My brother's too busy being all seriously depressed and cutting himself to bother with trying to get back our trunks full of money that are sitting there just waiting for the bureaucrats to crack open. And Mom? Well, she had an affair with the pool boy, so Dad cut her out of the will and divorced her. She's happily living life as the pampered sex slave of some Wall Street mogul. She loved her comfortable lifestyle more than the pool boy. He just couldn't make enough money to keep her happy. It's too bad because he was pretty cute and good in bed. I had sex with him a couple of times. Well worth it. Believe me. I think my cousin did, too, and God knows she's an absolute skank, so I guess I couldn't do that anymore without possibly catching a case of crabs or worse. She wants some of my dad's money and thinks if she hires all kinds of expensive lawyers she can get her dirty little mitts on it. Sorry, bitch, but you're not a direct descendant and it's not my fault your father cut you out of his will!!! She just needs to go crawling back to him and beg his forgiveness if she wants some inheritance. But she won't because she's one of those kind of people who think they're never wrong. Damn my family's soooo dysfunctional, huh?
Anyway, I digress. Right now I'm looking for someone to smuggle the money out of that godforsaken country it's sitting in by posing at a low level government official or a barrister or something important enough nobody will ask questions when they give orders, but won't really notice them too much and realize they shouldn't be there, either. Then they need to get the money on a plane to England where I can go get it. The problem is nobody wants to do it for one tenth of one percent of the money they're smuggling out. That's still a nice chunk of change, but people nowadays are greedy and why should I give up a lot my hard-earned money because someone does me a tiny, little favor? Honestly! People just disgust me anymore!
Oh, I'm sorry. Didn't you have something to tell me? Something about getting a trunk out of England and running away with your Nigerian lover? Sounds stupid, but hey, that's your life, not mine. Anyway, how can I help?
Kisses,
[Me] |
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_________________ x 134 known, lost count since then -- thanks to Dharma for this one.
x 188
A.Z. 2013-2015
"If You can't figure out the scanner find someone smart to do it ok?"
"KISS YOUR INHERITANCE GOOD BYT DUMP ASS"
"its [wo]men like you who truly ruin my days."
"Do you realize that you have pushed me to tears?"
"I pray you die of horrible disease in Jesus name for wasting my time. The is serious business." |
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oscarpiles
#1 Moderator
Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6776
Location: Sec tarnfuseslking with Fae and she co
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Posted:
Fri Jun 07, 2013 12:29 am |
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^Love it! Lets see what I can stir up....
Lad says:
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I am contacting you because I am looking for a partner... |
Yeah there were a few hundred more words but that's all I saw:
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Hi Perry,
This sounds Fabulous! You're the second Man today who has contacted me with this exciting offer and all I can say is Wow!!!! I can't believe how popular I have become since joining Men Looking for Bears. Yes I am willing to to be your Partner so that we can realize our Dream; Pure Unadulterated Man Love! GRRRRR!!!!!
Grease me up, take me to a George Michael Concert and I'm yours Cowboy!
John
PS - Can I call you PerriWinkle? |
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_________________ DON'T BE A SQUARE DONATE
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits
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Ginger Lee
Baiting Guru
Joined: 19 Mar 2012
Posts: 5380
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Posted:
Fri Jun 07, 2013 12:49 am |
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My character (the Rev) was holding a fundraiser for a hitlad who asked for forgiveness. I informed him I took the $83,419.00 and left for vegas. He asked:
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what the hell is going on with you Rev..how do i get the money here
now why did you run away with the money ...?where is the money now!!! |
The Rev replied:
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It's on Black! Have you ever played roulette?
I won $23,000.00!!!!
I told you I was a good gambler!
Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except crabs. Remember that my son.
Wednesday my son, Wednesday is Western Union Day!
test question: who's your daddy?
test answer: not this guy! |
and when the hitlad got real mad, the Rev sent
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Don't spoil my fun. These chicks here know how to treat me.
Hey, have you ever worn a ball gag?
You must try it one day, trust me son.
Let me leave you with one last life tip, always have a safe word.
THE EAGLE HAS VOMITED
viva las vegas! |
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Kokomeister
Baiting Guru
Joined: 10 Sep 2008
Posts: 3001
Location: Wandering around the world with a sense of adventure!
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Posted:
Fri Jun 07, 2013 1:21 am |
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Quote: |
I have sent your several emails over the past month and have not heard back from you and when I do I have to check my spam box to make sure it did not end up there. Since it did, it made me wonder: Have you received any of my emails?
Please tell me you did because I absolutely despise repeating myself.
Anyway, the weather has been quite lovely lately. I even went to a public bath just to cool off! It gets awfully humid here in Japan so I'm always wet even when I just got out of the shower! Since it is summer there's all sorts of horror TV dramas on right now so that we can cool ourselves down by getting scared shitless. Horror movies here are quite demented and I would rather spend my time looking at hardcore pornos than having severe night terrors for the entire summer. No thanks!
I just finished a cup of outrageously delicious Matcha tea and a hearty breakfast of steamed rice, natto, umeboshi, broiled salted salmon, and of course no breakfast would be complete without orgasming pickles.
Have a lovely day,
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_________________ red head gangster (Emma the Tropical Herbalist)
YOU ARE PLAYING WITH MY LIFE ADVENTURE (Joel Desire)
YOU ARE SUCH A BIG SICKNESS THAT STEP ON ME! (Joel Desire)
YOU ARE TOO SMALL, GO AHEAD WITH WHATEVER YOU THINK OR IMAGINED THAT YOU CAN DO TO ME, ONCE YOU TRY ONCE YOU WILL DIE HARD. YOU BETTER DON'T TRY ME AT ALL YOU FOOL- Mariam Abacha (6 months)
<a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=232044">[Current ongoing bait]</a>
<a href="/forum/donate.php">[Exclusive prizes]</a>
x17
Auntie Tina- Lagos-Parakou-Tanguieta-Niamey-Tera-Mallanville-Lagos "well the story you read in children's fairytale story book when you are young is not the same as what is happing now." |
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oscarpiles
#1 Moderator
Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6776
Location: Sec tarnfuseslking with Fae and she co
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Posted:
Thu Jun 13, 2013 11:58 pm |
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^Okay I'm not going to try to compete with that one!
Lad:
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Please confirm that you have receive details of your bequeathed fund. If not, details will be provided to you. Be advise to add our address to your address book for better communication.
Regards,
Darryl McDonough
Clayton Utz Law Firm
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Mals:
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Mr. McDonut,
I McThank you for the McMessage.
McMilburn |
Edit a wee bit of spelling. |
_________________ DON'T BE A SQUARE DONATE
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits
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