A deeducated lad - Previously LOTR Massbaited

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Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 2:36 pm

At least he is polite now:

Quote:

Hello,

Sorry for responding late, i discuss with the transferring bank
regarding on how the payment should be made by you, according to the
CEO he said that the cost of transfer must be paid by the borrower via
western union, and he also said that the repayment of the loan will be
send via bank to bank, so i admonish you to go ahead and send the
payment of the cost of transfer via western union so that we can
complete your loan transaction

Thank you

Mr Baggins

Well perhaps not so polite after all.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 9:27 pm

Just to keep dragging our little friend through the muck, I decided to see what I could get out of him:

Quote:

Baggins,

That is so much better isn't? Nothing better than doing Business with a civil minded professional I always say.

Being said, I will go to this Western bank Union on Friday and initiate the transfer. In the meantime, I need you to provide me with your Banking information so that I can prepare the necessary paperwork with my Lawyer.

Thank you for your time,

You see I'm feeling a bit left out as everyone else got a Piggy but me! This strategy is win win in my books but...Aw Jeez the Little Leprechaun went right back on script. The same fricking Email from whenever I started screwing around with him! Oh well time for plan B or is it F????

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 9:54 pm

Just tell him that you can't / won't use WU for whatever reason, and he should cough some bacon up.
I've now told him I'm in the hospital (I did mention to him earlier that I was sick), so for now my payment is delayed. I don't really have any clear goal for this bait, I suppose I'll just see where my mood (and his!) takes me.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:12 pm

^I can't say that I have any real goal here myself other than pissing the Lad off and wasting as much of his time as possible. Since I DID say I would go to that particular 'Bank' I'll probably do the old couldn't find it, it was closed, what was that name again etc. Of course that will be After I give him proper crap for not doing as I asked him to do in the first place.

Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 7:32 pm

So I've been prodding Da Little Guy for a Bank Account and he just isn't budging. After some rather strange messages, he comes up with this beaut:

Quote:

Take my word. try as much as possible to come up with the fee, i
assure you immediately you make the payment the loan will be
transferred to you instantly. The GT Bank is enormously ready to do
the wiring of this fund to you, immediately as soon as they receive
the Fee, Just believe that the fee is a challenge to you, if you have
that believe then you will receive this loan soonest. The ultimate
measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but
where she stands at times of challenge and controversy....

i will want you to know that this company is a God fearing company that you can depend on and so you have to try and trust this company,
Setting a goal is not the main thing, it is deciding on how you will
go about achieving it and staying with that plan. You have already
receive this loan, the cost of transfer is what is holding down this
transaction. I know how things are with you right now. It is a general
phenomenon. . I am only not advising you like a client,but as a
brother. I will be the happiest man on earth after this fund must have
been transferred to you. There is no secret to success, it is the
result of preparation, hard work.and seriousness. Please try to come
up with this fee so that we can make each other
happy.

This is an opportunity I won't allow you to miss. If you should miss
this, it then obviously means that I don't love your progress. I know
how you feel right now, but feel free because you will soon receive
this loan. The fee for the cost of transfer is very compulsory. The
great opportunity in your life is where you are right now. Every
situation, properly perceived, becomes an opportunity for you. You
have grand opportunities all round you. Open your eyes, and you will
find it. Just believe that you have already receive this loan. The GT
Bank will not fail immediately they receive the cost of transfer...

NOTE: Motivation is very important, but it is determination that will
make you cross the highest mountain and most difficult river is rare.I
will advise you don't give up,the root of this transaction is were
will are now. All i need from you is that you can be able to pay me
back my money when the time is dew for the payment and i need
assurance from you okay.. so you do not have to be afraid that you
will not get the loan funds transfer to you okay,you have to put your
trust in me and God.

One important thing you have to note in international transactions is
that the confidence, understanding and cooperation is needed to allow
both the lender and the borrower Develop an understanding for another.
Another thing to understand is that the firm is dependent on the Loan
Fund since it lets you know if the transaction is Legit Not. Your past
transactions or e-mail give me a sign that you never appreciated all
what I do for you. This is interesting but not impressive. Most of the
failures in life are people who never realize how close that success
when it was delivered.

This is an opportunity for you. And I will make every effort to ensure
that they grab this opportunity, the end can only tell. Hope that are
used to this phrase "the end justifies the means." Nobody is
interested in knowing how it started, which always wants to know how
to finish. things are more surprising that it is not surprising
appreciated things, I will make a surprise on your face, as long as
this operation is maintained. An urgent message will be highly
appreciated immediately makes this message.
I will advice to try and get these payments so that they can get your
loan funds transferred to you. I guarantee you that as soon as your
make the payment, your loan funds will be transferred to you without
delay. so you have to get this 3 things that make transaction go
smoothly 1..Courage... 2...faith... 3 trust if you have this 3 things
in mind you will get this loan transaction with out any stress..

So you have to get back to me on when you will be making the payment
so that i can notify my bank okay.

Maybe I should have Bolded the entire thing?

Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 8:58 pm

Whoa, how long did it take for him to come up with all that??? Great time wasting you are doing!

Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:29 pm

^Honestly I have nothing to do with it. This little Feller just seems to come up with all kinds of very strange crap. As usual I keep calm, talk real nice like and simply befriend my Pet until its time to drop the dime:

Quote:

Baggins,

What in the Blue Hell are you Blathering about? I ask you a straight forward, simple question and you write me a Novel about God, Motivation, Nuts n' Berries and some other stuff I'm just not comfortable mentioning here. If it weren't for your Machiavellian reference, I would swear that you were one of those subversive Greasy Hippies that I see all over the news. You aren't a Greasy Hippy are you? I loathe Greasy Hippies!

Now being said, I had asked of you one small request. You have completely ignored it and instead sent me this New Age Hollistic Schlock? Yes I understand that many people are now into such an 'Alternative' Lifestyle but I simply do not swing that way. What you do in the privacy of your own home is one thing but never bring that to the table when we are attempting to do Business like reasonable, Mature adults!

Your complete disregard for my own Business has caused me quite a bit of embarrassment Baggins! One does not simply make Mals Drysdale look foolish. After bragging you up to my Lawyer, Richard Licker, I was astounded that you would treat me in such a manner. As a Professional you really ought to know better. There is a time and a place for such HomeoPathetic discourse and, well this just isn't it! You getting me Baggins?

Due to your utter incompetence, Richard ( or as he prefers to be called Dick) was unable to draw up the appropriate paperwork before the Weekend. Now we are back at square one aren't we? Thanx for screwing up my days off! All I was looking for was a fast and reliable way to initiate the transfer process and you turn it into some sort of Rainbow Loving, Fruit Flavored, Granola Eating Love-In. Well it's true isn't it Baggins?

You talked about stress and yeah I am stressed! Now get me the answers I need in Short Order okay?

One of these days I'll try to get good at this stuff but in the meantime I am just cruising along....

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jan 2009 Posts: 1440

Quote:

The ultimate
measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but
where she stands at times of challenge and controversy

He's quoting Martin Luther King. Shocked

The "Setting a goal..." one is from Tom Landry. I guess Frodo learned about Googling for inspirational quotes, but he really needs to credit them instead of claiming they come from his own wee brain.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 12 Sep 2012 Posts: 2

Got the very same lengthy reply from Froddo myself on Friday gone.

It was so amazing I was tempted to send him some money as a thankyou for making such a moving speech!

I of course am in the process of messing the little tinker around as much as possible myself.

Had to slap him a couple of times to show him whos boss!

Happy Baiting

FS

Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 2:32 pm

Don't forget, today is Hobbit day! Razz

Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 2:42 pm

Here's a little of my recent correspondence with the hobbit. I decided to introduce a new character to spice up our relationship.

Quote:

Hello again Mr. Baggins
I have just spoken to the doctor today, and it seems that I'll have to
stay here at the hospital for a long time, probably several weeks. I was
thinking of involving my half-brother Jeffrey Lebowski in our deal, and
have him carry out the payment etc. Don't you think this would be a good
idea? He should come visiting me later, then I'll tell him about our
deal and give him your email address.

Regards,
F. Prefect

Quote:

Greetings to you,

I perfectly understand your point, i want you to give your
half-brother Jeffrey Lebowski the bank account details and instruct
him to send the cost of transfer sum of 810GPB and that once the
payment is made he should scan a copy of the deposit slip and send it
to my email, and once i confirm the prove of payment then your loan
sum of 50.000GPB will be transfer to you.

I also remembered that you will be needing some money for your
treatment? so i will ensured that your loan get to you immediately the
prove of payment is received by me.

So when am i expecting the payment so i can quickly inform the
transferring bank?

Mr Baggins

Quote:

Thank you Mr. Baggins, that is very nice of you being so understanding.
I'll speak to Jeff when he comes visiting me later today. Just one
point, so that you won't be surprised: Jeff never uses his own name, he
always refers to himself as 'The Dude'. Beats me why, but he has always
been a little odd...
FP

The Dude chimes in:

Quote:

Hey man, the Dude here, so what's this business you want me to take care
of for my half-bro?

Quote:

Hello Dude
Thank you for your response, Mr Ford told me about you, i want you to
use the below account details to send the payment of 810GPB so that we
can transfer the loan sum of 50,000GPB to your half brother account

We understand that he is currently receiving treatment in the
hospital, you are to send me the deposit slip after making the
payment.

Quote:

That's a great plan, Frodo. That's fuckin' ingenious, if I understand it
correctly. It's a Swiss fuckin' watch. You know, where am I gonna get
the fuckin' money from, Frodo? Ford's in the hospital, ya know?

Oh well, mind if I go and do a j?

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 8:11 pm

^Aw I was Gunna invoke 'The Dude'! Okay maybe not but I wish I had!

Anyhow, His Shortness (after a wonderful weekend off) has sent this:

Quote:

Hello

What exactly is wrong here? what do you want from me? from the look of
things i don't think we can continue this transaction again, it
obvious that your point is quite different from mine, Two Can not work
together unless they agreed, you seems not to agree with my terms and
conditions so let quite this transaction to avoid any further
embarrassment from each other.

I wish you a nice life

Mr Frodo Baggins

Nice life? Without my 500 Grand? I don't think so!

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 9:38 pm

So I respond with some kind words just to ease the tension:

Quote:

Mr Baggins,

What exactly is the meaning of this? I asked you a very simple question and you decide NOT to loan me Money after all? You are definitely not understanding what I have been saying and are being very unprofessional here! Perhaps I should get in touch with the Great Bukaki and tell him just exactly what sort of Small minded individual you really are? In Short, Baggins, I am not the sort of person that you can mess with. You got me?

Now that I have your attention Mr.Baggins, please ensure that you answer my question and don't give me some lame excuse either. I need to know the real facts and would like them sooner rather than later. I have other commitments that Dwarf this particular matter, if you understand what I am telling you?

I don't think I was out of line do you? Frodo thinks otherwise:

Quote:

Go ahead and report to who you want to report to, we cannot continue
this transaction again, enough of those nonsense. i don't beg client
to take a loan from my company, but client beg me to obtain a loan
from me. your transaction has taken enough time, i think there are
serious people out there that need a loan urgently and we are
attending to their demands, the transferring bank cannot wait any
longer, for the past two weeks we have been asking you to send the
cost of transfer of your loan you just seems alderman to the payment,
for this reason we shall be terminating your loan and send it to a
more serious client

Have nice day

Mr Baggins

The Little Prick has just got my attention.

419Eater is my life Joined: 07 Feb 2012 Posts: 438

He's dropped me on 2 characters so far, and only because I refuse to tolerate his poor attitude. I just fired off an email from character # 3.

I know his emails are not interesting, but you can only imagine his frustration that none of his business is bearing fruit. I derive pleasure from that knowledge.

Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2012 3:24 pm

At long last my little Frodo produced:

Quote:

What is going on? i send you the account and i never heard from you again?

What is going on here?

Mr Baggin

For crying out loud Little Buddy that was Yesterday!!!!!

Quote:

What exactly is wrong with you? you think i am here to play jokes? why
are you making jest of me, i can not take this anymore, i have had
enough patient from your silent, i think i will handle this by
terminating your transaction

Regard

Mr Baggins

419Eater is my life Joined: 07 Feb 2012 Posts: 438

When is going to learn to be accommodating? Maybe this would be a good time for someone to shoot off an email acting as an oga offering to fix his script?

I know we don't usually send ID's but do you think it would do harm to send one so blurred it really can't be used?

419Eater is my life Joined: 07 Feb 2012 Posts: 438

So now I've requested a loan for $1000 with a 19 year term. My payments will be something like $5 a month and he wants me to pay a $100 transfer fee! How absurd! I told him that would bump my 2.5% interest rate up to a 12.5% interest rate and I didn't think that was fair. I could get a 2.9% interest rate locally. I asked him if we could reduce my transfer fee to 4$ and I'd pay the rest of the interest over the next 19 years totaling $25.

Laughing

I can't wait to see what he has to say about that.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 12 Sep 2012 Posts: 2

Think I might of got my first piggy out of Mr Baggins?

Good day,

I understand that you are not comfortable using WESTERN UNION as a
means of payment, here is the company account details to send
payment.. please pay the 450usd with EXPRESS PAYMENT so that we can
received the $450 within few hours of payment, after making the
payment you are to send me the payment slip for confirmation.

Name Of Bank: UNITED BANK FOR AFRICA (UBA)
Account Number: #'#'#'#'#'#'#''####''8
Account Наме: '#'#'#'#'#''#'###'####'
BRANCH: EKPOMA, EDO STATE, NIGERIA
Swift Code: UNAFNGLA

Thank you and i hope to hear from you ASAP

Mr Baggin

---------------------------------------------

Of course Ive done the decent thing and let Alan know.

Ive now managed to blag him into thinking he has received a payment and he has gone to collect his loot.....

----------------------------------------------

"Okay, wait i am on my way to bank now, i will get back to you soonest

Thank you

Mr Baggin"

----------------------------------------------

Hope he doesnt meet any Dragons on the way there???

Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 8:49 pm

Congrats on the piggy, FrankiesPence!

I am still with Mr. Baggins, me writing him mostly as the Dude, and him complaining to my other character that the Dude is impossible to work with. Sorry Baggins, but you are stuck with him if you want my money!
Twisted Evil

I finished my last mail with: "I love you Baggins, but sooner or later you'll have to realize you're a goddamn moron!" which had him writing to my other character, both as Baggins and as Sheila Onion, sobbing and saying "he called me a moron!" Rolling Eyes

Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 10:20 pm

After he finally gave me an account I've simply dragged my feet. He still responds to my 'Questions' and standard abuse although he is starting to clam up:

Quote:

Now listen and listen good Baggins. I told you that I needed to work on the transfer with my lawyer did I not? This would have been settled last week if you had not done such a sloppy, incompetent job wouldn't it? I will be meeting with him later today so I would expect you will have your payment before too long.

Mals

PS - I expect a proper apology for your extremely rude and unprofessional behaviour.

I'll dangle a carrot in front of him before too long as he is starting to get fed up.

Posted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 10:46 am

I think I'm done with our short friend, we've pretty much resorted to pointless name-calling now. Rolling Eyes

Then again, if I'm lucky we can continue doing so for some time!

Posted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 10:57 am

Just when I think he has had enough, he comes back for more:

Quote:

Good day,

I got your email, i am very sorry to had offended you, so once the
payment is done then you are to send me the deposit slip for the
payment for proper verifications.

Regard

Mr Baggins

419Eater is my life Joined: 07 Feb 2012 Posts: 438

Good to know someone else has signed on to cause this lad grief.

I'm still negotiating transfer fees.

Posted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 9:57 pm

I sent this off to Half Pint earlier:

Quote:

Mr. Baggins,

I am NOT impressed by your performance as of late!

There appears to be a problem with the account that you sent to me! When I went to the Bank today, I was whisked aside by Security and taken to a Manager's office where I was interrogated for a very long time by Law Enforcement Officials. I was told that the account is under investigation for Fraud and Terrorism among other things!

What exactly are you trying to pull Baggins? As a trusted Business professional this was an extremely embarrassing situation for me! Not only was I treated like a common Criminal but I was told that I was also under investigation.

What do you have to say for yourself???? You had better have a good answer for me and I want it quick.

You got me?

Mals

I know, nothing fancy but I thought I could wind him up a bit and well it looks like he has brought in the "Big Guns". It might be a coincidence but I would like to think not as Mueller himself has entered the ring:

Quote:

ONLINE LEGAL AND LEGITIMATE LOAN LENDERS

1,[email protected]
2,[email protected]
3,[email protected]
4,[email protected]

THE FBI AGENCY.YOU ARE TO STOP ANY LOAN TRANSACTION YOU HAVE WITH ANY LOAN LENDER THAT IS NOT FOUND ON THE ABOVE LIST.

Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 11:01 am

Little foot weighs in on this turn of events:

Quote:

Greetings to you Mr Mals
I am very sorry for responding to your mail lately this was as a
result of my health, i fell ill early yesterday so i quickly go for a
medical checkup, by God grace i am healthy now, i received your email,
i am sorry for the embarrassment you received from the Law Enforcement
Officials.

Well, i like to inform you that i am a legit lender as it was stated
by the FBI, my company have never involve in any internet crime so i
see no reason why the Law Enforcement Officials should embarrass you
at the bank, my company is among the best and trustworthy company
here in Nigeria.

I beleive that this is a conspiracy and i will immediately forward a
letter of dishonesty to the appropriate authority to look into this
matter, for the main time i like you to have the full confidence in
God and my company and i beleive that every thing will be fine, your
loan transfer sum $500,000 was deposited in your Bank Account
Number:57856737.

The reason why you have not received this loan is because the
transferring bank is waiting to received the cost of transfer sum of
$700 which i understand that you are trying to do.

Base on the situation of things now, i want you to use WESTERN UNION
and send the payment today because the transfer of your loan is
already 80% concluded and i beleive that once your loan is received
then the Law Enforcement Officials will allowed you to send the
repayment to my account.

I want you to know that your loan was approved and sign by the money
laundering council, you have nothing to be afraid of, i promise you
that you will not loose a penny in this transaction, so go to the
nearest WESTERN UNION and made this payment so that we can complete
the transfer of your loan.

Thank you and i hope to hear from you

Mr Baggins

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