dating site scammers

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Aug 2012 Posts: 5

I "met"a man on a legit site.. I am usually very cautious, he said he was cautious too. There were a few red flags,my friends told me I was being paranoid. I knew if we communicated long enough that more red flags would appear. They did, and suddenly when planning to mert me,he had this great job opportunity overseas. And of course after many I miss yous etc. He asked for the money. He posed as an engineer, even sent me pucs of the check and contract he was awarded. When the red flag appeared I had started doing my research. Don't waist a lot of money on search sites, because if these scammers are good, you won't find anything. Example : reverse e-mail search, are going to come up blank. They have created this account just for you, and they have so many filters and security that there is nothing in cyber land to associate it with. Reverse phone number is another one. With pay as you go, and things like Magic Jack, it is hard to pin point where the phone originates. Addresses are just made up, if he is lucky someone actually by his assumed name owns property and he can use that. In my case he found someone with the first initial and last name associated with an address. I searched property tax records and found thst the first initial was actually a female and not male. Searching further the female was not in the age range one would associate with the guy, race was presumed different based on the names if known associates. I never sent this guy money. He never knew anything but my phone number,and e-mail address. I felt safe until my bank called and told me there was suspicious activity on my account. Luckily they declined all transactions and I took all my money out and established a different account. How he managed that I don't know, but Imassume he used the same type of searches I did. I didn't feel stupid as much as pissed. Usually according to the experts these people just move in. The creepy thing about him, is that he admits to what he tried, and at random will try to contact me,even though he knows thst I know he is a scammer. I turned everything I knew about him to the Feds and various dating sites.

Posted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 10:10 pm

This is why I hate love scammers, they prey on the lonely and vulnerable. You were both lucky and unlucky. Some scammers are so amateurish that they ask for money in a couple of emails. Some will spend an enormous amount of time "courting" you and as you found are pretty savvy. It is puzzling how he was able to try accessing your banking without your having provided any details. That is worrying. Changing accounts was the safest option. It seems to be a favourite "modality" of Nigerian based scammers to pose as engineers, usually they pretend to be British and on a road building contract in Nigeria.
The rub here is to sort out the wheat from the chaff on these sites. They do have a part to play and on these sites there are genuine people of both sexes looking for partners, that's why they are havens for scammer scum. The main thing is NEVER to send money or details to these people and to educate all around you of the dangers.
Stay safe and welcome here Smile

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Aug 2012 Posts: 5

Sorry about the typos..geesh I hate that. I am really dedicating some time in involving my friends and educating them. The agent I spoke with tjought I did a fairly good job at researching as much as I could without being a professional. I hate to think that we have to consider people quilty until proven innocent,but it is a sign of the times. Since telling my story, some people have come up to me with similar experiences, but were too ashamed to speak about it. You feel very violated when this happens. I went to the bank and wanted to withdraw cash, I have to admit that I lectured the Teller when she failed to ask for ID... One thing a friend told me is watch for withdrawls of less than a hundred i.e. 99.96$.. Those fly under most banks radar, also if someone asks for money in USD... Another tip off.

Posted: Thu Aug 23, 2012 10:30 pm

Well done Kam, just the posts you have made have helped educate. Thank you. Please stay around. clapping

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Aug 2012 Posts: 5

The guy who tried to scam me contacted me. I told him confession was good for the soul. And reminded him thst it would do no harm, after all I knew nothing of who he really was. I asked questions and he talked. The first thing he asked me is if I knew I was talking to two different men.. Looking back there was a difference in sentence structure and the nsture of the correspondance. He told me he set up the e-mails and his friend was the one who texed and called. And thete was a dufference, e-mails were romantic, texts wete more flirtatious. It also explained some of the inconsistancies. Note to self...watch for that. The man I spoke to had an accent, european..was he, no my little scammer said, he is just good at accents. What is your race..I asked...he replied black,, Nigerian? Yes he said.
I asked him many other questions.. Some which he said he wouldn't answer. He did tell me my e-mail several days earlier that told him I knew it was a scam made him smile, he said my attention to detail was splendid.. I am inclined to believe much of what he says.. It makes sense, he is honest that he tried the scam.., he said I must think they are the dumbest con artists in the world. Not knowing what the other one was saying, one selling out the other? Like dumb and dumber he said. I have no illusion that he would try to scam me again..as he said, it's what they do, but the crazy thing is he keeps talking..he wants to continue tomorrow... He may answer my question on how he obtained the cell phones etc. He said he would think about it. Anything useful I will post...

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 2:00 am

Hi Kam, you came to the right place, catching on very fast and we are glad to have you.

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 11:13 am

Whatevever you do Kam, don't educate the lad by telling him what he's doing wrong. That makes him harder to spot and more convincing in his scams. Play along, don't point out errors but please post anything useful here. Any really private stuff, PM a mod. Happy hunting! Smile

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 20 Aug 2012 Posts: 5

I am doing my best, he has given me some insight, actually he gave me dating advice lol like, if you meet a guy and he starts off by talking about overseas jobs, and not able to meet you right away it's most likely a scam. He also mentioned something about e-mails which I will clarify . I asked him if he has ever scammed a male, he said no but it can be done. I told him about someone that I would love to pull off a scam on, but I had no idea how to go about it. He has already started giving me info, like going on spokio to get his dating site profile . He said I need to create a profile using a new e-mail service and post a picture of someone. I asked him how to do that. He will get back to me. I think he is very amateur but he has communicated with me everyday... even sent me funny videos to watch during our hurricane scare. I am being cautious, but by his willingness to help me, he will give away some tools of the trade which I will share here.

Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 3:22 am

We have a very clear position on baiting safely, and there is a reason for that position. Playing with a scammer who has your real-life information is in NO way baiting safely.

Scammers are professional liars. When one angle doesn't work, they will try another. Confessions and friendship are angles that have been used time and time again. Part of the information he gives you is true, part will be lies. Ultimately, when used with a victim, they will simply lead to an attempt to a new scam ("My situation has become desperate--if you don't help me I'll be forced to scam again") or they will lead to an attempt to pull the victim into helping in his scams (for example, as a mule--mules in other countries, especially in the US, are worth a lot to scammers, as they can add a lot of plausibility to their scams.)

Of course when things go south, and the scammer is angry at you because he thinks you played him, he can do a wide variety of things out of anger.

Things scammers have pulled when angry at victims or would-be victims include (but are not limited to):

If he is an amateur as you said, he is not going to tell you anything we don't already know. There are no benefits that justify throwing safety out the window.