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Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2011 9:19 pm

Branwen, that is something I haven't seen before.

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jun 2011 Posts: 1066

I have a lad who has been pretending to be an American even though his IP traces to Ghana. Usually he tries to slip in southernisms but today, after finding out that I "sent"the money, he was so giddy that he slipped into ebonics:

Quote:

No thanks because you the man.

I replied:

Quote:

Word.

Baiting Guru Joined: 27 Mar 2011 Posts: 21158

After my threat to Slice Max, I found this in the inbox! Now he will really catch hell!

Quote:

See any sunshine.... You won't for long

Larry Matusz [email protected] to me

show details 4:30 PM (6 minutes ago)

Hey Derrick,

My name Agent R.Wiler from the Chicago. You are now a person of interest in my investigation. My intern is getting your whole life downloaded electronically as you will find out shortly there is no way to run or hide. Your gonna be pissing yourself in a corner wondering who is coming for your now. You see us, you won't hear us. You will love Charlene as I am sure she loves you. Her kiss is a millisecond away... You know what "Charlene" is going to do when I ask her to "send" it? It's that pink mist that you won't be able to see or hear!!!!

Anything for you, my new project....

Soto Capo Delta

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 12:01 am

Quote:

It's that pink mist that you won't be able to see or hear!!!!

I'm still trying to figure that out!! Shocked

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 8:01 am

^Something to do with sniping, I believe...

Meanwhile, here's an odd place to put an airport (emphasis added):

Quote:

You are to send the $500 as soon as possible because the clearance has to be done here at the luncheon International Airport, South Korea.

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 1:43 pm

It's one of those hard to see proposals!!

Quote:

I am Mr. Wen Lee director of operations of the Bank Of Taipei Taiwan. I have an obscured business proposal for you. Reply if interested.

Posted: Sat Oct 29, 2011 8:55 pm

From a bait being run entirely through google translate... the lad sends out Spanish scripts, but they're so poorly worded I suspect he is running English scripts through Google translate and looking for Spanish-speaking victims. Anyway, he thinks I am French, but I'm not, so of course I have to translate it back to English. This is the nearly incomprehensible result of the now-badly-off-script lad attempting to explain what I need to do. Too bad I haven't the foggiest idea what he is saying. Laughing

Quote:

Please, sir, you have custody of the funds directly to the amount of $ 1,000,000,000.00 to my bank that the funds are in Lagos, Nigeria to reach the end of the workday today would be negligent in transferring Nies funds if not I hope it is clear that if I need it immediately terminated. It is a desperate need for relief and urgent that I send you this message today as part of the transfer of emergency funds immediately.

Posted: Thu Nov 10, 2011 1:11 pm

Quote:

WE ARE SORRY TO IN FORM YOU THAT THE IMF HAVE SEND A SACULER TO INLAND REVENUE AND THE BANK TO CANCEL YOUR PAYMENT\

sent by

Quote:

MR DOMINIQUE DRAUX

Posted: Thu Nov 10, 2011 7:40 pm

G0mer chopped and unhappy:

Quote:

YOU WILL PAY 4 IT THE REST OF UR LIFE...RIGHT NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING OUT LOUD BUT MARK THIS VERY DATE 0LATUNJI...SOME ARE SPIRITS.............

Honestly, I didn't mean for it to send him into the next world.

Posted: Fri Nov 11, 2011 5:41 pm

You have to love the power of understatement:

Quote:

Dear Sir

You are right so many things is happening here in Nigeria so many bad things that is why the International monetary fund is here to fight for corruption.

Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2011 6:40 pm

Quote:

but hope your management is not mentoring all our conversation?

did he mean monitoring?

Master Baiter Joined: 17 Mar 2011 Posts: 198

From P0pe J0hn, in his desire for Colon3l Kµrtz to call him

Quote:

so i like you to get back to me with your messengers

Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2011 6:19 pm

Quote:

Due To Numerous Complains From The Fbi And Other Security Agencies From Asia, Europe, Oceania, Antarctica,South America And The United States Of America

Special Agent Penguin here. Is that a Weddell's Seal in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Laughing

Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2011 8:17 pm

Hi Eaters.....

Some of you may remember me, I do still bait, but in 'different' ways to Eater, and usually not nearly as funny, but I had to share this gem I got tonight...

"you are really the queen of england?" - Mr Joli Eze, my new pet.... Laughing

Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2011 9:52 pm

^^^ SIMBA!

beers!

Welcome back!

Posted: Tue Nov 15, 2011 10:05 pm

The safari master returns! Yay for Simba! Welcome back!

Master Baiter Joined: 17 Mar 2011 Posts: 198

From P0pe J0hn, the lad that keeps on giving:

Quote:

may my god bless you in jusus (AMEN)

Quote:

HOW IS THE THE PERSON THAT DIED IN YOUR CHURCH

here · Posted: Fri Nov 18, 2011 12:26 pm

gotta love this signature!

Quote:

Bye remains in the Lord
HAVEN IS REAL

from Dr. Pastor Wenga Massinga
maybe he's off on a camping holiday? http://www.haven.com/

from a brand new lad, looks like this lad might be fun Cool

Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2011 10:47 am

Oops, my poor cancer sufferer has died! (Emphasis and comments mine)

Quote:

This is to inform you that the body of my client Mrs. Angella Powell was found dead in her house on Saturday after returning from the hospital (why was a dying woman sent home?), i was with the member of her family and her doctor was with us in her house to confirm she is dead, her doctor made it clear to everybody that her sickness has gone beyond control and now that she has gone she will find some rest, the burial will take place at 11:30am in her house (Wouldn't that be illegal?) this morning.

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 11:20 am

I believe part of this (emphasis added):

Quote:

All Governmental and Non-Governmental parasitical, NGOs Finance Companies, Banks, Security Companies and Courier companies which have been in contact with you of late have been instructed to back up from your transaction

Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 11:43 am

From the chem bait:

Quote:

note that we are so sorry for this strees both it is for the betterlity of this goods to move faster.

Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2011 5:16 am

Mal got a bit flippant, and the Lad banker didn't like it, though there maybe was some truth in the reply (emphasis added):

Quote:

Dear Valued Customer
Your mail has been received,but we will not respond accordingly or do anything until you re write your mail to us again in another format that makes you look responsible as you ought to be,remember that this mail is not read by animals but an negligent human being with class,so resend your mail again or i will not contact you anymore but i will write and make the report to the president about your rude mail,have a good day.

Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2011 12:00 am

Branwen wrote:

I responded to a lad's first script, and the reply came with this subject line:

Quote:

Subject: 2ND FORMAT FOR THOSE THAT REPLY

Wow. That's impressive.

Now just don't educate the fool.

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jun 2011 Posts: 1066

I was browsing the jobs section on Craiglist and came across this prospective employer:

Quote:

We need 25 assertive customer service workers to work with the Local Cable order department starting ASAP.

"Local Cable"? Oh yeah, I've heard of those guys. They're huge around here. Everyone uses them.

Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 2:24 am

Mr Obah is desperate to warn Mal, and his agitation is affecting his English something bad (emphasis added):

Quote:

Dose purple day want to scam you again and day are not the real Eco bank plc in Nigeria you have to stop write day now if you don’t want to scam again. Call me on phone I will tell you everything because I am going to the bank today lat me know the person that told you that your fund is in Eco bank hear Nigeria. Please try to call me with my number because dose purple not want you to receive your fund into your account.

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