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Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 2:57 pm

Thanks Cosette! It is an unfortunate disease. Unfortunately it is too costly for Doughnut to be tested by doctors because she cannot be moved from her house. All her treatment has to be done as home visits by a travelling surgeon.

Mike says:

Quote:

And again honey just make sure you send me the money today i will be very happy, have really missed you so much and i can't wait to be there with you in person make sure you send it by western union. My Motel manage Address Okay

Name.
Citty . London
Country. England

Mike Doughnut

He gets this in reply:

Quote:

Hi darling. I love you too baby. I'll have to try and find someone to take it to the western union office I can't walk there now as I only have one leg due to the operation. I've never used this western union before. What do I do? You will have to give me very clear instructions to give to someone who can go for me.

And please be clear as I have trouble thinking straight with only half a head.

Oh Mike. If I still had my daffodil I would think about your dinkle rain in it but now there's nothing there but a scooped out crater like on the moon. Big and full of dust.

Honey I am so desperate to see you. I am scared I will lose you as I lose other parts of my heaving bulk. My breast-buds are tingling - an not in a good way.

get here soon while there's still parts of me that identify me as a woman.

Your wife Doughnut XXXX

If those instructions aren't clear I fear that someting could go wrong. And just how trustworthy would the pizza delivery boy be with £1000 of a housebound invalid?

Love Phil X

Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 4:46 pm

Just send money. that's all he's worried about - and the money is fading away fast :yikes:

Great work bow_down

on keeping him on the hook for so long. I'm sure that his fellow baiters are impressed with his results (no money).

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 9:37 am

Hi Phil,

Only just caught up with this thread (productive morning at work Very Happy

)
Just wanted to add my thanks and praise for your awesome baiting.

My particular favourite bits are "Monster Munch Pickled Onion", "Saint Langoustine" and "necrophilitus yerbootsius" - genius. In fact, it is all great Smile

I've written my application to the Fan Club but I think Terror Mask is swamped with applications at the moment (quite rightly)

Looking forward to hearing more from the fragrant and captivating Doughnut

-Amadeus

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 11:36 am

Thanks Amadeus!! Glad you're enjoying the bait. Not sure what fragrance Doughnut smells of though. Eau de Mort?

Mike is treading water while he waits for the money:

Quote:

Good Morning my wife how are u doing and ur leg? i just want u to know that everything will be good soon i promise you wish am there with u now to take good care of you but i promise you verey soon i will be there with u in person okay i love you so much with all my heart and soul i can't wait too spend the rest of my life with you cos you have been my dream and i will never let you down, Love You So Much

About the money honey pls try and find someone that will take it too western union office i really need the money too pay my Bills Pls you just have to send the money today if you really love me find someone pls honey am really down

Make sure you send it today honey

Your lovely husband Mike

Then he sends:

Quote:

Good Morning Love what Up? I can't stop thinking about you You mean the world to me. <snip lots of boring format>

So honey did you know something when you get to the western union just get them the information and tell them too send it there. after sending the money to this information they will give you a copy of the western union information so you will email everything too me Mtcn number and the Question and Answer OK make sure you send it today

Name.
Citty . London
Country. England

You know what honey send me some of Ur pics i really need it okay
Missed You so much..

Morning Kiss and Hug

Mike Doughnut

Hmm… he asks about the leg. Maybe he really doesn't mind having a rapidly necrotising wife. I'd best make sure though:

Quote:

My darling Mike. I was so glad to receive your letter. I have asked the pizza delivery boy if he can take the money to the Western Union for me. He is a good lad and knows me well because of all the pizzas I have. Sometimes three 24" mega spicy meat feasts a day. He says he will take my £1000 and go there.

Mike are you still happy to be with me even though I only have one arm and one leg and half a face? I am UGLY and disfigured and fat. MY DAFFODIL IS ALL GONE!!

Mike I cry and cry now out of my one remaining eye. I can't show you my face it is too horrible. Here is a picture of me from the back. I hope it helps you. [I photochopped an arm off]

Please write to me about your sexy dinkle and what you would like to do with me. I need to feel desirable and still wanted as a woman even though a lot of me is missing.

I LOVE YOU MIKE!!!

PS. Please try to explain what has happened to me to Little Doughnut. I'm afraid she might not understand being so young. And does she know that she won't be getting the $80,000 anymore because you didn't fill in the form properly? I don't want her to hate you. You can tell her that I made a mistake if you want.

Love Phil X

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:07 pm

Time to get this chump out of his repetitive format requests to send the money. He just sent this pile of crap:

Quote:

Honey, you have changed my life completely. You're the one who makes me Handsome. You're the one who makes me strong. You're the one who makes me feel so important; you're everything to me, You show your love to me every day. I thank God that I have found a Lovely caring pretty woman like you.

This is my way of showing you how much I truly care for you. I can't really find the words to explain the way I feel when I see a pretty pic of you ... all I can say is that I like the feeling that I feel. You make me happy i promise too always loving you i can't stop loving you baby...

Honey i promise you this when will get too meet in person i will always making you happy in bed i love you with all my heart and soul have been thinking of you wish am there with you to take good care of you love.. But honey always knew this that am really in love with u, and i can't wait too spend the rest of my life with you..

Honey Susan have been missed you so much also but i told her that very soon we are going too meet you in person she love you more than me you know that..

Love You Be Good we are missed you both.

Honey just make sure he get it send today okay

I Love You So Much

This is my reply:

Quote:

My darling angel Mike and Little Doughnut.

You have to help me. My ex-husband Simon is here. He's just gone to the shops to get some more wet wipes for my stumps. I thought he was the pizza delivery boy come to give me my meat feast and take the money to the Western Union for you. When he came in I was so shocked!! I didn't think I'd ever see him again. Mike he says he is sorry for leaving and wants to be with me and look after me. He doesn't know about you yet. You're the one I love - NOT him!! What should I do? he says he will help me through my illness, he says he will empty my toilet bucket and make me fried egg sandwiches. I can't force him out of the house because I fall over if I try to stand up.

I think he somehow found out about granny's money. He's a greedy lying bastard. Help me Mike. If I can escape I will get someone with a flat-bed lorry to take me to London. I'll bring the money with me.

Got to go I can hear him at the door Love Dough

That should shake him up a bit.

Love Phil X

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 03 Jun 2011 Posts: 1

I just had to join up to comment on this; utter brilliance!!

Next time I get a scamming email I shall think twice about hitting delete! lol

Keep up the good work!

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:45 pm

Hi verybusy mum, welcome to the Eater!

If you want to start baiting, be sure to bait safe - anonymously. Never mess with a lad who has your real details. And use an email provider who hides your location, Gmail will be fine.

For added fun, read the stickies and Eater University.

And I agree: Phil's baits are utter brilliance.

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 2:01 pm

Welcome verybusymum!! Glad you joined up with 419eater. And thanks for commenting. I'm also glad you're enjoying the bait.

Try and it explain it to someone else though and it goes like this:

There's this funny internet site.
OH YEAH?
Yeah. It's about stopping scammers.
OK
There's this guy called Phil Yerboots
IS THAT HIS REAL NAME?
No. It's a made up one.
IS HE A SCAMMER?
No he's a baiter.
A WHAT?
It doesn't matter. Anyway, he's pretending to be a woman.
RIGHT…
Called Doughnut
0_0
Anyway, she's had to have parts of her body chopped off
0_0
No seriously it's really funny. Ok Ok. Not a good example. There's this woman called Nurse Nasty.
IS SHE QUALIFIED?
Well actually she might not even be a woman. But she gets men to dress up as clowns…
IS SHE A PSYCHIATRIC NURSE.
No. She's not a real nurse.
I"M CONFUSED.
Oh just go to the website and see for yourself.

Master Baiter Joined: 26 Mar 2011 Posts: 128

great wonderful and brilliant bait Phil.

On one side it is really funny and encouraging- on the other side if I imagine Doughnut could be a real victim and Mike is telling her anything just to get her money- this side is just shocking...

BUT the good thing is, we get entertained (and educated) too, he's busy with Doughnut and no time for other victims.

thanks
Orange Rose

Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:42 pm

Thanks Jeanette. Thanks Orangerose.

Orangerose said:

Quote:

he's busy with Doughnut and no time for other victims.

Well, he's less busy. Unfortunately and realistically he probably has lots of victims on the go. One only has to look at the length of time between emails or the mysterious pauses when indulging in IM chat (as I have occasionally done with other scammers) to realise that.

BUT we're into the 5th month of his attempt (so far) to scam me with no results which hopefully makes him look bad if he's in a team or will at least cause him to have high blood pressure when the frustration reaches its peak. At the moment he is still all lovey-dovey but there will come a point - a rather satisfying one - when he loses his rag. I'm looking forward to changing my signature line quotes anyway.

Love Phil X

Master Baiter Joined: 26 Mar 2011 Posts: 128

ok, at least it takes some of his time and hopefully some really good quality of frustration and anger after all.. Well done- 5 month!!!

To see the reality is still hard. But at least there is something we can do.

Orange Rose

Posted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 8:43 am

^^ That's right Orangerose. As a greedy, tax-dodging corporate monster says "every little helps."

Mike sends some desperate words of love:

Quote:

Honey did you known something You just have too tell him to leave you alone Okay that is the only thing am going too Tell You

Honey You just have too get the money send first thing by tomorrow morning so i can get my motel bills Pay, am not really happy have been thinking how am going too pay the money today but u never send anything just make sure you get it send tomorrow morning that is the only thing u can do too make me happy for now. honey you promise too never let me down so u just have too help me honey if you really love me..

Unfortunately, Doughnut is trapped:

Quote:

Honey. I am up early so I can write to you. Simon is STILL here. He is asleep in the next room snoring like a drunken pig. I told him to leave me alone but he said he won't go because I need him to help me now that I only have one arm and one leg and half a face. he says that he will stay with me forever and take care of me then he asked if I had made a will and what was going to happen to all my money when I'm gone.

Mike he wants to steal my money!! The money for me, you and Little Doughnut. All of it! £1,230,000!!!

Mike you have to tell him to go away. Scare him. Tell him you will hurt him or do bad things to him. Otherwise I will never be able to get to you or to send you money or see you again.

darling I got his email it is <snip>

but don't tell him we are together he will get angry just think of something to frighten him away from here. PLEASE help me.

Doughnut XXX

Lets see if Mike can put his Gangster face on. If he wants Doughnut he'll have to fight for her!

Love Phil X

Posted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 10:53 am

Absolutely hilarious love it can I cheat on you with him lol

Posted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 7:44 pm

Thanks for the offer scammerbringiton. You're welcome to whatever's left of Doughnut at the end of all this. She would never cheat on Mike. After all, he doesn't mind the fact that she hasn't got any downstairs lady parts and there's not many men who would make that sacrifice, surely?

Posted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 8:22 pm

Good! Berenice is a lucky girl! she just lost an ear! Laughing

Posted: Tue Jun 07, 2011 8:45 am

Mike is tired. So much work, so much effort, so little reward…Apparently he won't write to Simon and he's not happy about being strung along. Funny isn't it how scammers moan about the self-same tactics THEY use when the shoe is on the other foot.

He says:

Quote:

No way, I do not think I would be able to do that and I will never do it for any reason, just imagine, you have never been straight with me, all you would do is always come up with one excuse or the other but you should have told me before now that Simon had always been there for you, why telling me now?

After making waste all my entire life patiently waiting and hoping you are the woman I would spend the rest of my life with, what do you want me to tell Susan and how do you think she would think to hear this?

You made us empty promises, got us excited over what you were never going to do and you really hurt me the more, making the hotel manager embarrass me everyday like I had no life of my own to live, anyways, I do not think your Simon would stop you from sending the 1,000.00 so do it if you want to and if you will not, then, forget about me, I will hustle for it.

Mike

Yeah, Mike. Why don't you go and hustle for it as that's what you're good at!

I reply:

Quote:

Mike my darling husband. Little Doughnut my lovely daughter.

You don't understand. Simon has NEVER been here for me. He left me remember. We are divorced. He is only after my money. I hate him. Mike I am so upset. It sounds like you are going to leave me? How could you? After all we have been through. You are my only hope!! Simon is keeping a watch on me.

Do you think I wouldn't have already sent the money if I could? Honey I can't get out of the house. I only have one leg!! Simon told me he has gone to the shops to get some cucumbers and bean sprouts and that he will make me a nice big salad to eat. But I want Pizza!! Honey he won't let me eat pizza!!

I am so sad. Darling. I'm going to put the £1000 in an envelope and post it to you. I will tell Simon that it is a letter to the bank or something so that he will post the letter for me and won't know what is inside. Shall I send it to the hotel baby? What address shall I post it to?

PLEASE DON"T BE SAD BABY. I am trying to do my best with the time I have left. You have to believe me that this is not what I wanted. Simon is horrible and he is just pretending to be nice to me. Yesterday while he was giving me my sponge bob bath he was sick all over my breast-buds. Mike I want to be with you, Mike. NOT HIM. NEVER.

HELP ME!! Make him go away.

I don't know how often I can write to you because I have to wait for him to go out.

I LOVE YOU MIKE AND LITTLE DOUGHNUT XXXX

Hmm..it's obvious Doughnut doesn't read the news. I have a feeling if Mike doesn't do something that salad won't be the healthy alternative to her favourite 12" deep meat feast.

Love Phil X

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 2:50 pm

Lazy Mike is clutching at straws. He writes:

Quote:

Honey You make me feel special, like I'm your one and only. You make me feel like I'm a star in the sky lighting up your life. You make me feel safe when I'm near you, wrapped up in your arms. You make me feel like an Handsome from heaven because you never stop telling me how much you love me. You're always lighting up my heart with the things you do and say. I feel so happy just being with you this way. You're my baby, and will forever be my baby. You'll will always be the love of my life.I love you more than words could ever express.

I wanted to tell you today how good I feel about us and our future if you know u do love me and you care about me a lot let make our future together now Okay i can't wait too spend the rest of my life with you am missed you my wife,,,

I am sitting here somewhere in the world thinking about you, thinking about all the things we've spoken about, all the things we've said to each other, thinking about the so many "I Love You,I know you are somewhere at the other side of the world thinking about me too. Wherever you are and go, you go with me. I walk by your side. When you go to bed, I am stepping in it at the same time you are. When you sit down to eat, I am next to you to eat too. When you are combing your hair, I am there kissing and stroking it, smelling the smell of the shampoo you use. I am so in love with you

Always know that am really in love with You and Nothing can changes the love i have for you OK...
Honey if you don't send me the money by tomorrow i will never email you again am really Fall up.Send it to my motel manager send it by western union
Name.
Citty . London
Country.England

Susan is not happy and pls try and make her happy We Love You Both
I will always treasure our love and keep it safe. I love you, Baby.

Your Lovely Husband

OH NO!! Simon has caught Doughnut on the computer and fired off a swear word laden note to Mike:

Quote:

listen i just caught my ex mrs trying to email u so this is her ex husband simon alright?

lets get one thing straight u fucking toerag leave my doughnut alone alright? u sound like a gay. what's up with the fucking shit poetry u ponce. go and sniff someone elses shampoo u fucking pervert.

and whats this about money? any money she got is hers and mine understand? the fat slag is rich and i intend to get my hands on as much as i can before she has any more disease in her and dies. u say u love her? u ought to see her she looks like a fucking freak. one arm one leg half her fucking head gone and nothing in her knickers. the surgen's coming on friday to cut her fucking tits off too. so don't tell me u could love her cos shes fucking ugly.

now piss off

I don't like Simon. He's really nasty. Will Mike stand up to him?

Love Phil X

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 4:57 pm

maybe doughnut has figured a way for simon to go away and suggests to Mike become her guardian. this way, when/if she dies, he gets the money. I'm sure that NN has a form for this to keep mike on the hook? Laughing

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 5:54 pm

Hahaha!!!

This bait just gets better and better...

Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 12:52 am

Ah Phil. Simon brought a huge smile to my dial! Before, I needed cheering up. Now I need a new laptop monitor Wink

Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2011 11:18 am

Thanks Chrys and thanks Fartina! It could be time to get a recording of this arsewipe!

With no reply to Simon's letter Doughnut manages to mail mike:

Quote:

Mike please help me. Simon hasgone to sleep and I am worried he will wake up if he hears me tapping on the keyboard with my one hand. He caught me writing to you and rolled me away from the computer. Did he write to you? What did he say? Don't believe him hatever it was. He is a cheat and a liar.

The surgeon came today and told me I might have to have my breast-buds removed. Oh Mike I am so scared. Why aren't you here to help and protect me? I love you. I better stop I can hear Simon getting up. I have to go

Mike replies:

Quote:

Honey You dont love me at all and you know i do love and care about you, you can send just 1000 too me just too pay my bills oh my god am just crying you can found some one that will get the money send too me

You don't love me if you do You just have too found some one

Mike

Then he sends:

Quote:

Honey you make me not not... Call my phone number and let talk okay +44 7024025908

Anyone who has followed this thread and fancies ringing this lad PLEASE do. You can be Doughnut, Simon or maybe even both!!

I'd love to hear Mike's voice. I'd love to hear Little Doughnut too for that matter. Yours Gratefully.

Phil X

Master Baiter Joined: 09 Jun 2011 Posts: 197

I read all pages today and yesterday. Really really funny! I´d like to read more. Thanks for sharing!

Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 8:07 am

^^Thanks Pretty's Darling. Glad you've enjoyed this bait.

Mike is sad:

Quote:

But why are u doing all this too me. You are not making me happy am just thinking crying and you promise too never let me down and now you are just Hurting me why why honey??

There is bad news and swearing though:

Quote:

Oi Mike u plonker. This is Simon again. bit a bad news u cock. doughnut's dead. yeah u heard me. fucking dead. it was fucking grim at the end. she had her other arm and leg cut off too but it didn't help. then she had to have her giant belly taken out. she was just like one big round piece of flesh with a hole in the middle. fucking gruesome.

she was calling your name out u tit. MIKE MIKE WHERE ARE U WHY ARENT U HERE she kept saying. i told her u had sent a letter saying u had found another woman and u didnt love her anymore. i think she cried for about 2 days.

anyway u probably wonder why im writing to u on her computer. well the stupid tart only went and wrote a fucking will with u and your thick daughter susan on it didn't she? she left u most of her money. £930,000.

so im going to see if i can change the name on it to my name because i want that money and i think i should have it not u.

what do u think of all that u gusset?

ha ha ha ha

simon

Maybe there is hope for Mike? It might not be so simple for Simon!

Love Phil X

Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 10:17 am

Without words! Shocked

Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 12:33 pm

^^ I guess the clue as to Doughnut's fate was in her name, Sweet Poetry. Who'd have thought?