Rapture (get those fee transfers completed by the 21st)

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Thu May 19, 2011 10:42 pm

Here are the folks responsible for the rapture: www.familyradio.com

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 2:23 am

^^^I would lay three to one odds that we will not be able to find that web site on May 22. Not because Family Radio took it down out of embarrassment; it will be overwhelmed and crash due to a huge volume of hits by people who want to see how they will prepare their crow before they eat it.

On the other hand, maybe I'll go and max out all of my credit cards tomorrow.

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Feb 2005 Posts: 2301

Stargate Jr. graduates high school Saturday. He's going to be pissed off if the end happens. I will be too! Just get the dude grown up, ready to start my 2nd honeymoon, and the BAM, the rapture. Since I probably won't be invited, at least the traffic will be a little lighter over the following days, plus I can sin, sin, sin, sin, sin, sin, sin, do all kinds of naughty things, sin, sin, sin, sin. Hey, this rapture thing doesn't sound so bad now!!!! Razz

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 7:32 am

There was a comedy skit once on a UK show called "Who Dares Wins" when they were doing a spoof news report on the end of the world...

"And for those of you worried if you might be sinners, office parties do not count. And that's official"

Laughing

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 1:36 pm

next victim wrote:

BE VERY AFRAID!

CDC issues warning of Zombie-Apocalypse After May 21st’s Rapture

Then you are very lucky that you are here on Eater as we have already prepared for that scenario.

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=177317

Now, technically speaking, that thread is with regards to the Zombie Armageddon and not the Zombie Apocalypse, but the gist remains the same and according to a majority of zombie experts, it will probably save your life if you heed the advice in it

My only worry is that I'm going to be forced to drink my own urine at least 20 years before I thought I'd have to.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 1:54 pm

Quote:

Mr Camping is not hedging this time: "Beyond the shadow of a doubt, May 21 will be the date of the Rapture and the day of judgment," he said in January.

No one will know for sure whether Mr Camping's prediction is correct until Sunday morning dawns, or fails to dawn.

We will have to wait and see, if it happens it was nice knowing you all !!!!

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

I'm starting a religion. It looks like this fellow and L Ron Hubbard have this all figured out, the magnificent bastards.

Quote:

According to those financial documents, accountants put the total worth of Family Radio (referred to as Family Stations on its official forms) at $72 million.*

* http://money.cnn.com/2011/05/19/news/economy/may-21-end-of-the-world-finances-harold-camping/index.htm

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 2:06 pm

^^ It's rapture, grandpa.
Not rupture.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 4:42 pm

I'm going to leave a pair of old shoes and little pile of clothes outside the front of my house tomorrow.

Should scare away the JWs that always call around every Saturday looking for new recruits if nothing else.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 4:48 pm

Now the BBC have it.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-13468131

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 5:04 pm

Isn't this a year early or eleven late?

I actually get pretty pissed off with people and their suckling of the apocalypse teet...I think if society collapsed it would be shit, I mean it's pretty shit now, I can't fathom a total collapse of what 'order' is left.

People like this just annoy the shit out of me, they sit and nurture apathy (ironic to what they're supposedly doing) when we should be using all this human brain cloud computing to fix it all up.

Seriously fuck people like this.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 5:22 pm

^^^ See you Sunday Very Happy

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 5:42 pm

As myself, Gordon Bennet, and a few others are going to be the first to go, given the time zone (settle down, stop cheering already) if I'm not here Saturday American time, start worrying.

Otherwise, barbque my place starting midnight Saturday.

Bring stuff.

Corona, just bring yourself honeychile. Wink

I bought another 2 Lotto tickets just in case.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 5:45 pm

Badgerbait wrote:

^^^ See you Sunday Very Happy

Just so that you know, my warlord name will be Scourge the World Eater, that way if you make your path down the barren post-apocalypse landscape, you'll know who to bring your tithe to.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 6:40 pm

I think my post rapture warlord name will be Bart of Fargo. I will command in and the surrounding area of Fargo North Dakota (including Moorhead Minnesota)

I will command farmers where and when to plant their crops.

I will control the flow of the Red River

I will re-name I-29 Bart Fargo Highway

I will decree that mountains are wrong and destroy all who hate flat prarie lands.

And this will be done with my mighty iron fist of DOOOOOOOOM!!! Twisted Evil

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 8:09 pm

Don't forget your skull pile, all warlords need skull piles.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 9:57 pm

@ er, Bart, you mean THIS Moorehead, Minnesota?
http://www.ci.moorhead.mn.us/the_city/index.asp

Is it because of the discount prescription drugs?
http://www.ci.moorhead.mn.us/the_city/prescription_drugs.asp

I'm thinking http://twicsy.com/i/NbTTk

edited-
found on teh interwebz

Quote:

Hows this for a dirty trick
On Sunday the 22nd hook up a loud speaker in your vehicle and drive up to church service and say
“Please proceed to the nearest Walmart, they are now the official Antichrist processing center, to receive your mark, do so in an orderly fashion or you will be eaten by the giant flying scorpions”.

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 11:13 pm

I guess I needn't bother with brushing my teeth or taking a shower tonight.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmX-lZOYcVA

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 12:20 am

Tomorrow? I will be down at the river's edge at the boat launch.

(Hereabouts "boat launch" is code for the bar down at the river at the end of our street.)

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 12:21 am

Boris_YELLsome wrote:

Don't forget your skull pile, all warlords need skull piles.

Already picked them up at Walmart today, 99 cents each!!

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 1:26 am

Hey Irish buddy, are you alright? I've been asking around and no one seems to know. You were my Canary in the mine.

Let me know how it is where ever you ended up...
Shocked

Note: I have watched the Mad Max movies, so I am pretty sure you will be okay. I always imagined you look like a young Mel Gibson!

See you at the Barbie. Very Happy

irishemigrant wrote:

As myself, Gordon Bennet, and a few others are going to be the first to go, given the time zone (settle down, stop cheering already) if I'm not here Saturday American time, start worrying.

Otherwise, barbque my place starting midnight Saturday.

Bring stuff.

Corona, just bring yourself honeychile. Wink

I bought another 2 Lotto tickets just in case.

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 4:17 am

It's 4.08pm Saturday 21st May 2011

The sky is a deep thunderous red, there are volcanoes erupting on the horizon as I watch the remote camera feeding the relay into my bunker buried deep in the Southern Alps.

The earthquakes have died away, but still the aftershocks continue. All around is ruin and desolation, fires are burning over most of the Canterbury Plains, there has been no radio or television reception since 1.37pm today when the last announcement spoke of a giant tsunami approaching Wellington.

The graveyards and cemeteries are strewn with broken coffins, the undead are travelling in small groups, susceptible to a shotgun blast at the moment, but who knows when they will become sentient.

Save yourselves, bunker down, protect your loved ones, drink Laphroaig.

transmission ends

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 4:30 am

I think "Mr. Fancypants" might be a good warlord name. Then when they call you it, you have the choice of eliminating them right there for calling you that.

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 5:42 am

Bullshit, I call hoax and scam right off the bat. If talks like a duck, smells like a duck, looks like a duck and quacks like a duck than it is a duck. Wink

Posted: Sat May 21, 2011 8:39 am

Also found
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/rapture
@irishemigrant, Thanks for the update!

Rapture (get those fee transfers completed by the 21st)	View next topic View previous topic