Catastrophic hard drive failure: withdrawal

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insults and more · Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 6:07 am

An hour ago, my laptop suffered a catastrophic harddrive failure out of the blue. This happened once before. That time, way back in college, I spent a few hours curled up in a fetal position in my own personal The Crying Game. I reenacted Requiem for a Dream continuously until I got my computer fixed. I think at one point I saw my laptop crawling across the ceiling. That was in my younger and more vulnerable years, before I had discovered nicotine.

This time, I handled it better. I calmly jammed four cigarettes into my mouth, lit them all, then inhaled half of them with one drag.

I held my breath for a minute, then let it loose with a bloodcurdling scream.

Tried Knoppix and BackTrack, they couldn't read it at all. Quick diagnosis: the motor had burned out.

I smoked a few more cigarettes in the next few nanoseconds, then realized I was devolving. I could feel my brow noticably thicken, and my knuckles felt more ape-like.

I hurled the now empty pack of cigarettes with enough force to kill an innocent bystander in Perth, then remembered that I have a computer I'm storing for a friend.

After spending half an hour running through the streets wearing my underwear on the outside (not stopping a single crime, but doubtless inciting a few), I decided to dust it off and try it.

I am now on Windows, for the first time in many years. It is blunting the trauma in much the same way a stick of bubblegum may temporarily ease the withdrawal from a serious heroin addiction.

The next few days will be busy replacing parts, screaming in incoherent frothing rage at the universe, and recompiling kernels. There will be blood.

Only after a suitable Stage 1 Gentoo install, countless tweaks, and a goat sacrificed to Richard Stallman, will the blood demons be calmed.

Things were going quickly out of control.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 7:14 am

I find

is a great help

It may not solve the problem, but it makes the problem disappear

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 8:02 am

Quote:

I am now on Windows, for the first time in many years.

I hope its running ME.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 8:11 am

Ewww! Winblows! Disgusting! (my opinion, don't shoot me Crying or Very sad

) Linux Mint 9 XFCE edition <3

Sorry to hear leon Very Happy

and ooooo Gentoo, been dying for quite some time to try that,, but I'm not smart enough to customize all this Very Happy

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:09 am

^^
I don't think I've ever read the word "Windows" without someone posting about how great Linux is, a couple of sentences later.

Now all we need is someone to post about how Macs are better than PCs and we've got the set.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:13 am

Which one do you prefer Slightlyoutofit?

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:30 am

I survive without either.

I use this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPPBzmn6Fh4

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:33 am

You wish

here · Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:40 am

^^^^^^^^
SOOI what this post needs is a "Don't feed the trolls" sign

oops! you already did Wink

insults and more · Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 12:05 pm

Chambon, try Sabayon. It's a very user-friendly Gentoo. Basically, it's exactly like Ubuntu/Mint if you never want to open a terminal, but underneath it's still raw Gentoo.

Slightly: even then, you just know someone will be bitching at you for not preferring NebuchadnezzarOS over ZionOS.

All I'll say is that Unix is the only operating system ever invented.

Everything else, from Minix to Windows, is just Unix with various levels of speech impediment.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 12:17 pm

Thanks Leon, I'll have a look at it, I might try Gentoo someday soon, if I have time Wink

How's your new installation going? Started yet?

insults and more · Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 12:40 pm

^^^ No, still waiting on getting a replacement hard drive. Maybe a hybrid, this time. SSD's have tremendous MTBF's.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 2:56 pm

I think you'll find our furry admin uses the kit shown below

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 3:17 pm

Should've bought a Mac - they're far better than PC's Very Happy

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 6:30 pm

Quote:

Should've bought a Mac - they're far better than PC's

Careful or you'll find ole hairy bollix coming round your gaff and breaking you statue of St Steve Jobs

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 6:33 pm

Someone needs to mention Ghost's awesome set up.

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 8:21 pm

I agree with iMike. My Mac is great Smile

Posted: Wed Feb 23, 2011 8:26 pm

Does doing all my baiting and eatering from an iPhone count as a Mac or what? Whatever that counts as is far superior than all other computing options! Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

OS war? I'm in!

Click bitchez

Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 12:50 am

I'll take my Mac OS and tower any day of the week Smile

Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:32 am

I stare at the view through the Windows, it fascinates the eye. The Frame is however rotten, and a slight breeze drops the shutters down periodically.
I patientley lift it up and fix it back into it's rightfull place, and with a sigh, clean the crud off the glass, adjusting the security catch for the millionth time and retire to make a cup of tea.
While i'm gone the window is broken into, the entire contents of my house are broken into pieces, stuck together again incorrectley and mislabeled.
Returning to the window i find a message scratched on the glass:

Quote:

Thank you for chosing (AVG/Norton/Panda/Writeyourowncatchphrase) Security. Your subscription expires in 364 days.

The cup of tea tastes of excrement. Shocked

I'm thinking it's about time i switched OSs. Confused

Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:42 am

^^If you go Mac, you won't go back Smile

insults and more · Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 5:23 am

^^^ Mac is just plain old Unix with some glitter on.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 05 Mar 2009 Posts: 582

leonsumbitches wrote:

An hour ago, my laptop suffered a catastrophic harddrive failure out of the blue. This happened once before.

Pfffttt, amateur.

Call when you have taken out 5 laptops in 48 months. I should work for the Toshiba laptop destruction department. Friends don't send me anything until they have saved it first in a file on their computer entitled "dumb blond who crashes 'puters".

Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2011 5:28 am

The Man: You do all of your baiting from an iPhone!? I love my iPhone but I think that I would go insane trying to keep track of and reply to multiple lads using only my phone. Hats off to you.

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