Andrew and the traveling computers!--UPDATE!

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Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:12 pm

Thanks YW! Wouldn't have been possible w/out your handy GPS device!

Just received this message from Andy to Agent McT4horn:

Quote:

Mr. Tom McTh4rn,

I received your mail and all the contents are well explanatory literally, in as much as i don't know the expect of fraud you have been investigating Barry on i wish to believe that what connected me to Barry is not the bone of contention which is to receive the laptops and deliver it to the church of Rev. Phil Shucks at Abeokuta. I have never do anything or any kind of business with Barry ever in my Life, According to who connected me to him, he said he need two Nigerian who will receive and deliver the laptops to Rev Shucks and that is all we are doing, no any other money transaction or any other business drug business with him because i am living in Ghana.

However, i can assist you to get Him with your cooperation, Your offer of $15,000 is enough to entice me and discourage me at the same time because many times such bogus offers are made but no cent is paid which is a scam of it's own.
I have his schedule and he is proposing an appointment with me on Thursday in Lagos, if really you are serious i can promise you that on that day i will deliver BARRY to your hand, Barry has even made me to cry, he made me to spend the little money i kept from my petty trade for my two children school fees, Rev. Phil can attest to this, so if you are serious send me money right away i will be in Lagos to receive the laptops in other to deliver to deliver to Rev. Shucks, on the process of handing over the laptops to me, you will get him arrested.
If you are serious send $2,000 so i can fly down to Lagos tomorrow and prepare grounds to get him arrested.
Rev, Phil is somebody i consider as my God father, so he has asked me to cooperate with you an that is what i will do upon your seriousness.
Send only through Western Union money transfer, if you send inform rev phil give him a copy for him to be witness.

Regards,
Andrew Igbxxwe

Just need to get past this little blip about the money and we can have him traveling again!

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:23 pm

Andy wrote:

Barry has even made me to cry

Did Andy ever write an email that didn't mention his crying? What an f***in' baby...

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:28 pm

^^^ Well said. This is building up to a critical mass of lad rant when this all ends. I hope you are ready for a geyser of invective. Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:36 pm

Quote:

Just need to get past this little blip about the money

you could tell him your not authorised to pay cash up front, only on delivery of Barry (dead or alive Twisted Evil

)

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:50 pm

SlapHappy is going to make a call for me as the FBI agent. Can't wait to hear it!

I will be calling Chima later. Apparently he wants to tip me off about the FBI agent. All of the sudden Chima's emails are coming from Nigeria, while Andrews are still from Ghana.

Chima has left me several messages over the weeks, and his voice always sounds different. A few lads posing as Chima, perhaps?

He also coughed up the hotel info. I'll be checking on that later.

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 10:58 pm

I'm on the edge of my seat! Top-notch work, Nowhere Man! Thumbs up

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 11:00 pm

Quote:

Your offer of $15,000 is enough to entice me and discourage me at the same time because many times such bogus offers are made but no cent is paid which is a scam of it's own.

Probably a script even he has used... Confused

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 11:23 pm

Nowhere Man wrote:

Quote:

point out you're African American

Nice point, gents. Will do.

Before you do that, think about a different cliche you could use. Cuomo makes me think of Italy and one stereotype associated with Italian immigrants in the US: the mafia. The FBI must be after something bigger than a bunch of computer. Perhaps o' picciotto Cuomo is in Africa for 'big bisiness'.

What could possibly be inside those computers, for him not wanting anyone near them? I begin th suspect the reverend is not what he says to be... Confused

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:33 am

Tom from the Federal Instigation Bureau calls Andrew.
http://www.4shared.com/audio/4aKr981j/Andrew_10_17_PM_Tuesday_14_Sep.html

Thanks for the idea, Claire! I sneaked your little extra plot line in there. Very Happy

Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2010 3:23 am

@SH: That was hilarious! Well done. I love your detective voice--very Bogart-esque.

Thank you so much for doing that. If you ever need a call made, don't hesitate to ask me.

You made me out to be one hell of a crook! Diamonds--and other contraband. Intellectual property. Oh man. These guys aren't going to know what to think now.

As for my next move? I'm not sure. I need to sleep on it and see what kind of emails come pouring in.

I think Chima is going to have something to offer. Even though he was told not to tell me about the FBI, he is itching to--as evidenced by his two frantic emails.

Thanks to everyone for following this thread and offering up some fab ideas.

Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:27 pm

Federal Bureau of... Idea

Instigation???
LOL

Well done SH. I was thinking drugs, you threw in diamonds. Much more valuable. Too bad Barry already picked the package: the diamonds could have been the payment for the stolen IP and the scheme could have been to fly them back after a crooked gP$ employee swapped the drives with the diamonds. That would have explained why the package has always been out of the lads' reach.

It would be fun to actually introduce the mafia in the plot, though. Perhaps by means of the shady associate of Barry. The picciotto might come into play to assure that the transaction goes well. "Don't you even think about looking at the black laptops, capisch? You know what happen when you fuck with Don Vito, don't you? You end up doing scuba diving for a long, looooooong time. How long can you hold your breath, Andrew?"

A new meaning for the word 'hitlad'.
With the mafia on their tails, they might even format their harddisks.

PS
As a matter of fact, Mr. Berman simply runs a scuba diving school in New Jersey. Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2010 5:04 pm

Claire DeLune wrote:

Federal Bureau of... Idea

Instigation???
LOL

Heck, Tom certainly can't go impersonating a real law enforcement agency, now can he? Besides, he might not even be employed by one. Wink

I know exactly what happens when you go messing with Don Vito. I co-baited with him, and Charlie and his friend ended up safariing from Amsterdam to The Vatican. They were too terrified to go down into the Catacombs and emailed back, "NO NO NO! CAN'T GO THERE! THEY STEAL OUR SOULS!" Laughing

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 6:38 pm

After SH's call, I get this email from Ahmed. Looks like he is clearing out since the heat is coming down:

Quote:

Dear Friends,

Yesterday i was nominated to enroll in a academic course that will last for 6 months, i will like be traveling this weekend to United Kingdom i hope that we will still remain the friend we are.
Barry i have been waiting for you to fulfill your promise, please i appeal to you to be considerate to the plight of your fellow human beings, nobody will take all his wealth to the grave, when you are in a certain better condition help others willingly Allah will increase you but when you make a poor man to spend the little he has on your own business and you are sitting on it and making him to cry with the family each day and night, my brother what you are doing is harm, try to be a spiritual person, please settle this guys this is my last word to you Bary on this matter.

I wish all you friends well. When i arrive in Uk i will communicate again.

Bye for all,
Ahmed

Crying-everyone cries in this bait constantly.

Chima sends Barry a message:

Quote:

Please Mr. Barry I am strended seriousely i dont know where to go from here, no money on me please i need you to help me out please, now i have lost my job in Ghana because of this deal.

please call me on my phone 080692xxxx7 i am just roaming about the street since morning, where i have gone wrong i have not seeing this kind of life before, you call go to any hotel and lodge, call me tell me the name of the hotel i will be there. tears are on my eyes i am just like mad person on the streets of lagos.

waiting for your call.

Chima

Again with the crying. I bust his chops a bit about the fact that he thought I was white. I tell him my mother was African American and my father is Italian. He sends me this:

Quote:

Mr. Barry,

I am very sorry to address you as white okay, my matter of urgency is that the hotel people trow me out of hotel last nigth because i promise them you will come pay of the bill yesterday, i slept on the street, i am realy stranded, as i am write this massege with tears on my eyes, pleese try and be in lagos today so could help me out. i have really suffere alot, no food i have not taken my bath.

please call me again i missed your call last night because where i slept was not safe for me.

chima

I keep telling him I am on my way but my car is breaking down. It overheats every few miles and I have to stop to put water in it. That five or six hour drive from Benin City to Lagos takes me two days. Andrew isn't happy. I also try to set up a meeting between Andrew and this gold-dust lad I've been emailing in Accra. I propose the idea to Andrew.

Quote:

Dear Andrew,

I am in Benin City now, hoping to set out for Lagos today or tomorrow. I have received an email from Chima regarding the hotel where he has been lodging. I will try to connect with him as soon as I arrive. I tried to call him tonight, but he didn't answer.

Also, I have been in contact with a man in Ghana who deals in precious metals, a subject I don't know too much about, but apparently he sells them at a very good rate. He said that he would be interested in meeting with me to talk over prices. I told him that I could not do that, given my location, but that I have an associate in Ghana who might be willing to meet. I thought perhaps you could meet with him. I didn't give him any of your information, but he would like me to give him your phone number so that you two could set up a meeting place. Would you be interested in meeting with him and seeing what he has to offer?

-Barry

Andrew doesn't like that idea at all.

Quote:

What are you doing in Benin city for more than 4 days now? You were saying that Chima is not in Lagos, Good a thing he contacted you and gave you the location yo are still crawling in Benin city, what actually did you come to Nigeria to do? is it this package or anything else? or you came for holiday and enjoyment? why are you refusing to meet your brother Rev. Shucks If you don't want to go and meet Chima, he is worried that you are keeping so long in coming to Lagos and the money my brother gave him has finished, set out immediately or he will leave and go to East and that will be the end of seeing him.

I asked you to send me money from any bank there to enable me come down but you are refusing, Barry why are not considerate? now you are asking me to meet person and talk business on your behalf, send me money or you come here by yourself to meet him.

Andrew

I send Andrew a message, meant to be sent from the Rev but I accidentally send it from Barry's email. I was tired. I fucked up.

Quote:

Andrew,

I have received an email from Barry. He is on his way to Lagos, but is apparently having some difficulty. Have you heard from the agent? I want to get this figured out before Barry gets here. What are we supposed to do?

Please update me as soon as you receive this.

Rev. Shucks

Shit! I panic, and send an email from Barry to Andrew that says:

Quote:

Andy,

Did you get the message I forwarded to you?

I received that email from the Rev. It looked like it was destined for you, but it came to me. Can you explain what it means?

I realize this might actually work as a way of tipping Barry off to the fact that there are agents after him. Tragedy averted.

Andrew goes silent for almost 24 hours.

Meanwhile, Chima keeps calling me and asking me if I am in Lagos yet. He begs me to give him the name of a hotel where we can meet. When in Lagos, where else but The Golden Tulip!

Quote:

Chima,

I am crawling down the expressway in this crippled car. I slept in the back seat of the stupid piece of shit on the side of the road. It is 6 a.m and I will be starting off again shortly. I called to check availability at a hotel called the Golden Tulip--the man who helped my push my car last night recommended it to me. I don't know the address. You can go there and wait for me in the lobby if you want to. I was told it is very nice.

-Barry

I get a text from Chima:

Quote:

Mr. Bary, i have ask many taxi driver about the hotel none of them seem's to know the location, they keep asking me the area were the hotel is. If can tell me the i will come immediately.

And then this one.

Text:

Quote:

If you can drive to VICTORIAL ISLAND there is a good hotel over there. Please call me or text me the information. I so cold i slept outside last-night & was beathen by rain.

I tell him I'll pull over and send him the address. I also notice something strange at this point, and have to tell Chima about it.:

Quote:

Golden Tulip: Constitution Road, Lagos, Nigeria‎ -(0)1 2792980‎

Chima, I think I am being followed. There are some men in a black car that have been behind me all morning. They don't look like normal police--but they are always behind me, even when I stop.

Have you talked with Andrew? Where is he? Have you heard from the Rev? I am getting closer to Lagos, but this fucking car overheats every few miles so I have to pull over an fill it with water.

Uh oh, Barry is being followed, Chima is stredded, Ahmed has left for the UK, and Andrew is MIA. What will happen next? The (hopefully) exciting conclusion(?) to Andrew and the Traveling Computers!

419Eater is my life Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 366

Quote:

i have not taken my bath

This has been repeated so often it almost seems part of a script. It is not just this thread but several. I first saw it a few years ago in Michael's safari and thought that it was vanity now I am not so sure that it isn't something else.

p.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 7:04 pm

I'm waiting with baited (no pun intended) breath! Very Happy

Man, those guys really are crybabies. Of course there's a lot of crying here too, but with laughter. Laughing

That was a great save on the email sent from the wrong account. Kudos!

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:07 pm

Crybaby Chima says:

Quote:

i am just like mad person on the streets of lagos

He must be related to Jose's Senegal lads. Very Happy

You know they are really suffering if they say, they "haven't taken their bath!" Scammers don't want to look or smell like unserious businessmen while on the road. It makes it harder to scrounge the streets and cafes for extra cash from their brodas and others. Smile

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:46 pm

Nowhere Man wrote:

I send Andrew a message, meant to be sent from the Rev but I accidentally send it from Barry's email. I was tired. I fucked up.
Shit! I panic, and send an email from Barry to Andrew that says:

Quote:

Andy,

Did you get the message I forwarded to you?

I received that email from the Rev. It looked like it was destined for you, but it came to me. Can you explain what it means?

Shouldn't you send a similar letter to Chima, too?
Now that you are followed - and you surely suspect it's Don Calogero's boys trying to get a piece of the action - you are in desperate need of information. You might also leak some - partial - information to the lads, such as: "listen, there's much more at stake here than 20 lousy computers. Help me out and my associates will pay you well. If you don't, they might think you fucked with me, and believe me, they have no sense of humour."

Should you suddenly disappear, the associates might start to ask the lads what happened to Don Vito's property. Nagging to death, at every hour of the day and of the night.
Twisted Evil

You might even try the hitlad script on them Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:51 am

He would feel safer, although not much, if it was Tom the Federal Instigator following him. At least Tom is on "his side" for the $15k and more. He could be afraid of his own shadow at this point, and not willing to meet anyone. But hiding behind dumpsters and trees for awhile isn't such a bad outcome for now. Smile

@pablo - Hey, I just noticed this by the lad:

Code:

I so cold i slept outside last-night & was beathen by rain.

He's getting his bath, so no worries. What is he crying about then? Laughing

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 1:33 am

Lets focus on the Chima/Barry side of the saga for now.

Chima is on his way to The Golden Tulip. Barry is inching down the expressway, aware that he is being followed. He calls Chima to say that he is getting closer to Lagos and tells him about the men in the car behind him. The caring little lad that he is, Chima sends this text:

Quote:

I have recieved your e-mail & i am going there, i hope you can find your way? If those hudloms keep following you, you can leave the car over there & pick a taxi okay i dont want any thing to you. Please update on my phone

and this:

Quote:

I dont want any thing to happen to you leave the car & pick a taxi or follow public transport may later i wil go & bring it. Please for your safety okay.

I think he places a call to Andrew who probably informs him that these men are agents, because our next phone call Chima says 'oh no no, don't worry about those men. They are nothing to worry about. Just get to the hotel.' He is there now, it is 1:15 a.m. my time.

On our last call, I tell him that I have hidden the car and am going to find a taxi. I ask Chima what he is wearing so I know who to look for when I get there. He describes himself to me as a young man carrying a small bag wearing a checkered shirt. I call the front desk of the Golden Tulip, and the man confirms for me that yup, there is a man waiting for me. Apparently Chima has already asked for me by name.

It is 3 a.m. my time.

I shut my phone off wait a few minutes, and send this email from the Rev to Andrew, Chima, and Ahmed with the title--Someone Call Chima Immediately!

Quote:

I have just now received a message from Agent McThorn that they tried to arrest Barry as he was hailing a taxi, but he ran and has escaped. Apparently they had been following him for sometime in a car, and were afraid that he had been tipped off to their presence. I hope this doesn't have something to do with the email that I accidentally sent to Barry instead of Andrew, God forgive me. He was on his way to meet Chima at a hotel.
I will know more later. My main concern right now is to make sure that Chima knows what is happening. Please update me the moment anyone talks to him.

God bless you,

Rev.

In the morning, I wake up to about 12 missed calls from Chima (apparently none of his lad buddies care enough about him to call and tell him that I won't be making it to the hotel), and a text message that was sent at 9 a.m. that says:

Quote:

The hotel recieption is looking at me some-how for I have waited for long i hope you are not in any trouble? Please call me on phone okay

Then an email later, around 10 a.m.

Quote:

Dear Mr. Barry,

I have been waiting here all day but you are not coming, i have been asked many questions by the hotel people and i am tired of waiting and answering questions, please if you are not coming let me go back. Andrew is in Ghana, i think you always knows where every mails you receive comes from, or are you suspecting that Andrew is the person on the black car? hahaha, you see because of the ill treatment to Andrew if anything is happening to you, you think he is the one please he is not and he is not in Nigeria. He said that when i meet you you should give me money to send to him to enable him to come to meet us in Lagos, i think he told you that in one of the mails.

But the people in the black car have no reason to go after you, or is the problem you had in PH STILL ON? I thought that it's over why should any police go after you, any justification on that? Well whatever is the case be careful, these are the reasons while we need Andrew here, his father in-law is a senior police officer, Barry you need Andrew as long as Nigeria is concern, but i know you will not like the idea but it's ideal. Please let me know what next if you are coming or not.

Rev shuck told me that he sent one nathan to assist me but till now only one mail i received from him, i have not haerd anything from him the financial assistance is still a story, you Americans why you people don't keep promise, you people are really different from what we know of Americans. Please call me.

Chima.

In all, he clocks in about 9+ hours in the lobby of the Golden Tulip. Priceless.

Seems that Ahmed has had enough of this shit, he emails the Rev:

Quote:

Mr Shucks,

Please i will advise that nobody should send any mails again in respect of this transaction because you and Barry Put me in pain and face off with two innocent Nigerians, my relationship with their pastor that connected me to them has been affected with the virus of bad men.

What is happening now tells me that you intentionally abandon Andrew the day he came to meet you in Abeoukta, since then no action of yours has shown a sign of apology, if there is any sign of apology what should you have done, all these baffles me, in your own case because you are a pastor, No honesty to christan people, no love to themselves, all heartless, you are in position of helping your fellow brother and you never help or even instruct your brother Barry to do the right thing ever since i have never received any mail suggesting that you have ever encourage Barry to even empower these guys financially to enable them perform effectively, no time have i ever seen such mail from you; why asking me Chima, the Nathan you gave his mail what impact has that made, any assistance? you write every time to him and Andrew, do you care to ask yourself how he gets money to buy time at the cyber cafe to read and respond to you, I am very angry about these whole thing, i suggest nobody should write me or even them again, your own God will judge all these actions against this guys.

Mr. Shucks i want to put it to you that you and your church was only the reason and what we heard to accept this delivery contract, personally when i heard from you i know that we are dealing with a human and a man of God, so you should know that if these guys die or anything happens to them you are the cause of that, because we believed YOU

These may be the last i will write while am here, i will be in London on sunday morning maybe i will communicate from there.

Ahmed

Just to check on his honesty, I send Ahmed an email from a random account that says 'i'm interested, tell me more.'

He writes back almost immediately

'i don't understand. tell you more of what?'

Hahahahaha! Maybe he is giving scamming a little break for a while...?

Meanwhile, Agent McThorn sends a message to Andrew about the rev's mistakenly sent email:

Quote:

Mr. Igbokwe,

We have monitored the message that Reverend Shucks has mistakenly sent to Barry. This is a major slip up that could be very costly to our investigation. In NO WAY are you to tell him that there are agents involved. Make something up. Tell him the Rev was talking about an agent from a bible fellowship--or an agent from a local chapter of human services--anything.

Please report back to us immediately.

McThorn

Andrew re-emerges after a silence of nearly a whole day:

Quote:

Mr. Tom,

Unfortunately, since yesterday afternoon i was not able to check my mail, this mistake message is a real blow but nevertheless, i will not let him know anything about investigation, i will deny automatically that i don't know the agent Rev Shucks is talking about, is better he should email shucks so that he can clarify to him, i know he believes and respects shucks, any explanation he gives him will be accepted.
Regards,
Andrew

Andrew sends an email to Barry.

Quote:

Dear Barry,

Rev Shucks gave Chima a name of someone called Nathan that he is his agent whenever he is not there that Nathan is there to act on his behalf that he has directed him to see to his welfare, he has motor byick that he can use it to meet him in Lagos and give him some money, but since you are coming to Lagos he will direct him to pick him and direct him to the church for the delivery of the items.

Personally that is the agent i know rev is talking about, or maybe an agent from the bible school as he told me some time ago.

Chima called me after many mails which i was unable to check that he has been waiting at the hotel and he has not heard from you and he is tired and may be forced to leave Lagos. Please if you are not ready to reach Lagos then let him know, you see these are the reason i can never borrow money to anywhere, you never show concern to people's plight, and you always like to commit somebody in an unnecessary expenses and later you will decline, Barry why is it so in your life?

I am sick and tired of all these mess honestly.

Andrew

I start to sense that Andrew might throw in the sponge, so I send him this encouraging little message from McThorn:

Quote:

Mr. Igbokwe,

Have you heard anything from Barry. Perhaps you heard that he was nearly apprehended while on his way to meet Mr. Chima. He eluded our agents, and disappeared into a busy market place. We are not sure where he has hidden the car with the computers, and whatever else he has in that shipment. You never know with these criminals.
Can you give us any information?

Also, please let us know how you would feel about that meeting Barry tried to set up between you and that gems dealer in Accra. It could provide valuable clues to his whole operation. We can set it up in a public place. These things are time sensitive, so we must act on it NOW.

Don't give up now, Andrew. You have been really amazing throughout this whole ordeal, and if you could just see it to the finish line. We are almost there.

McThorn

And this just in! Man, just when I think it's over! Looks like SH and Claire DeLune's plot twist might actually happen here:

Andrew to McThorn

Quote:

Tom,

I decided from my heart to cooperate and still will as long as i am safe, but will not risky my life because i know if this kind of investigation that, immediately Barry is arrested nobody will know me or even if i fall into any predicament i will only suffer it, i have children very young and i need to be circumspect in anything i should involve myself because the future of my family is upon my shoulder, here is not America were the state can take care of children and their education. Honesty i am not happy with the costly mistake Rev Shucks made, now Barry is suspecting me as the principal person masterminding all these whole thing and he is now aware that something is going on against him, that mail shucks sent on error destroyed everything, now he is not even interested in meeting Chima and has not written to me, now the money he promised to give to Chima to me is gone and when i ask you to send me money to assist you in all these you talk a different version, so what do i do, i don't know.

The people did not do their work well, how can they miss Barry and give excuse of disappearing in the market, can\t they too appear in that same market? this is gross inefficiency, the way i see things as barry noticed that people are after him means Barry is a mafia, i am afraid of him now.

Andrew.

Enter, the mafia!

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 1:35 am

Juan Freizwidatt wrote:

I'm waiting with baited (no pun intended) breath! Very Happy

i did that joke way back on page 1 Laughing

keep up the awesome work NWM

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:51 am

Quote:

i am afraid of him now

That, my friend, is a beautiful thing! A little paranoia can go a loooong way. You know, the mafia has connections everywhere... Twisted Evil

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 10:15 am

Blimey Charlie. These poor boys do not know who to trust which is a great success as they will not work well together going forward and partially disrupt their scamming outfit.

Nice work.

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:41 pm

Nowhere Man wrote:

Just to check on his honesty, I send Ahmed an email from a random account that says 'i'm interested, tell me more.'

He writes back almost immediately

'i don't understand. tell you more of what?'

That must be because Special Instigator McThorn is monitoring his e-mail.
What about Wanda, I wander-- er I wonder?
she could mail back portions of her previous emails, so that McThorn will learn something about our lads. He will then have something to convince them to move.

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:32 pm

DeLune, you are pretty damn good at this. That is a great idea!

At this point, Andrew is beside himself with fear. He thinks Barry might hire someone to kill him. I'll post some updates later.

Hey! I just noticed I have some fries added to my siggy line! Woo-hoo!

Can someone PM me and tell me what the goat and the fries mean?

Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 7:21 pm

Top notch baiting!

Fantastic work

clapping

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