Medical Questions

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Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 3:23 pm

The problem with using technobabble or any specialized knowledge is that the lad can reuse it, even if it's wrong--and unless the next victim is an expert, he/she might accept the same explanation. For example, the kernel update excuse could be reused on a victim and they may very well believe it (in that particular case I wouldn't be too concerned tho).

Better to keep it simple and not re-usable.

-My psychic has told me I'm going to die in a ghastly phone accident, so I have sworn off phones.
-The government is listening in on my phone calls because I know who really shot JFK-so it's not safe to talk on the phone.
-I was microwaving my phone to improve the signal and I accidentally set the microwave for 20 minutes instead of 2 minutes. Now I hear every phone call in a mile radius, and it's too distracting so I don't talk on it any more.
-my 50 pound yorkie ate my phone and I'm low on money--I can either pay you or buy a new phone--which would you prefer?
-essophageel cancer? How terrible! My friend's husband's grandmother had that (or at least I think that's what it was) and they ended up removing her leg!

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 7:38 pm

^^^Concur. I once had an esophageal cancer-stricken lad who used a distinctly Arabic named. I told him that my brother-in-law had the same disease and his doctors said it was caused by excessive intake of booze and Italian sausage. I was hoping to get a rise out of him, knowing the Muslim prohibitions of alcohol and pork products. Instead I got a "confession" of his sinful lifestyle. I am sure he incorporated this into his pitches to future victims.

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 9:36 pm

Offering my services as a gynaecologist if any pretty young things need help. Very Happy

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jan 2009 Posts: 1440

khawk, I'm sure you'd be interested in this woman who wrote to me. It's a medical miracle.

Quote:

Mrs Angela Bishop Phillipe
I may not be opportune to live longer than one month, due to Postrate Cancer

Not quite a Newb Joined: 22 Jun 2010 Posts: 42

A woman is born with a prostate only to die from a prostate cancer. The irony of life...

Posted: Mon Jul 05, 2010 1:09 pm

MoutonBlanc wrote:

Is it true that tatoos are a miracle cure for lad-cancers ?

That has actually been known to work, well for lads at least.

But seriously. Thinking about this you don't really need any 'real' knowledge to deal with lads. I have a few RL health problems that I could use in dealing with lads. But they generally will not have that knowledge and if anything a little knowledge used on a lad could be dangerous. Anything that could make him sound a bit more convincing to a victim is a very bad thing. Victims are likely to, and probably have, fallen victim to the most idiotic of things. They do not share our knowledge. Things that are blindingly obvious to you, are not to me and vice versa.

@Dorothy - I love those excuses. One that I've just thought of is that I don't have a phone because the ring tones cause explosive diarrhea. Therefore I do not own or go near a telephone.

Master Baiter Joined: 28 Sep 2009 Posts: 100

Hi Guys, I take all the points you made. The overall point thoguh is that the knowledge is available if you need it. I think it's important that others offer any skills that they have too. I love the idea of a woman with prostate cancer!!!!. Seriously though, It's been asked a number of times about getting medical info over the internet. Most of what is out there is nonsense... If you have a medical problem and someone over the internet offers you advice, that means they are NOT a doctor and haven't a clue!. No real doctor would ever use the interenet to give a real medical opinion. No patient should ever use the interenet as a source of info. It is a simple as that. I've spent 15 years studying medicine and still don't know everything and could easily make a mistake. How bad could 15 minutes of googleing screw up your health?

Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 10:03 pm

^^Now you are starting to talk like a doctor. I do wonder if you have heard of telemedicine ... Wink

We don't have a repository of "experts" here on Eater. We have had people jump in and lend a hand. It would be a bit of a time waster to verify the credentials of everyone who claims to be an expert in some field of study, for the occasional reference point in a bait.

I agree that getting advice from strangers on the internet is a dangerous practice. You will notice that occasionally a member of Eater asks a question best addressed by an expert. The Mods and smarter members (cough, cough Laughing

) tell the poster to consult a proper authority be it legal, medical or financial.

I think I understand your thought and post. I will turn to you if I need any medical advice that relates to a bait. I will make myself available for semiprofessional consultations in the following areas of expertise:
1. Obstetrics and Geology (I have several children and a subscription)
2. Earth Sciences (Gold, Silver, Mercury and Mars)
3. International Law (I have close friends who are barristers)
4. International Marketing (I am good at this esp MLM)
5. International Affairs (I have had several)
6, Theology (What can I say here, I have seen many things)
7. Phrenology (Very difficult to master)
8. Agronomy (What is your sign???)
9. Kinesiology (Goes with #1, but worth the mention)
10. Methuselogy (Yes, I am that old)
11. Linguistics (Including pasta and pizza)

Don't hesitate to to contact me if I can help you!

12. Psychic (I knew you were going to say that) vvv

Posted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 11:03 pm

One lad was hardly interested in my (surgeon character's) proposal to help and remove both lungs, with his 'cancer of the lungs' dieing mother, but preferred an MTCN.

Lads aren't interested in medics, just in money. I don't see how expertise on a specific area could be added value to a bait.

Master Baiter Joined: 28 Sep 2009 Posts: 100

Telemedicine is a new technology helping doctors in fantasy land. They use is to diagnosis pots of gold coming out of unicorns asses. Telemedicine is something that the media reports on all the time. I've never heard of a real doctor using it. You cannot diagnose someone without being in the same room as them. If anyone tells otherwise then they are a lad.