Stupid/Funny or RANDOM Link/Joke of the Day

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Posted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 7:06 pm

I've sent this to some of my lads, they love it Smile

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hg8keQh6Ajo

Posted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 10:46 am

How those Johnny Depp pirate films really look without the CGI...

Posted: Wed May 05, 2010 4:34 am

ERROR (proper sound)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nK0OWAXTSdM

Posted: Tue May 11, 2010 8:36 pm

Racist troll post deleted -- bo

Posted: Thu May 13, 2010 1:44 am

Not quite a Newb Joined: 14 Jul 2005 Posts: 41

http://www.2flashgames.com/play/f-Goldilocks-Twisted-8575.htm

Spot the difference stories.

ETA - Sprout...reminiscent of Hapland
http://www.freepuzzlegames.biz/game/777/Sprout.html

Posted: Thu May 20, 2010 4:55 pm

Where were you yesterday/last night? , heres the link, see how accurate it is for yourself, its totally free and all you have to do is simply put a mobile number in the tracker box and it will them display location/info etc

http://www.themobiletracker.com/english/index.html

It could be used for lad tracking.....

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 2628

Muppet Bloopers

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KANI2dpXLw

Laughing

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2010 9:10 am

The Great Rose Bowl Hoax of 1961

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2010 8:38 pm

Just came across this makes you think !

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law.

I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example,

I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.
James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia

PS: (It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2010 8:47 pm

An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini , Italy ,
went to the local church for confession.
When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:
'Father ..... During World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our
neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from
the Nazis.
So I hid her in my attic.'
The priest replied: 'That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have
no need to confess that.'
'There is more to tell, Father... She started to repay me with sexual
favors. This happened several times a week, and sometimes twice on
Sundays.'
The priest said, 'That was a long time ago and by doing what you did,
you placed the two of you in great danger. but two people under those
circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh.
However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed
forgiven.' '
Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind.
I do have one more question.'
'And what is that?' asked the priest.
'Should I tell her the war is over?''

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2010 8:50 pm

These are actual comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system.

All teachers were reprimanded (but, boy, are these funny!)

1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and started to dig.

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.

4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

6. The student has a 'full six-pack' but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.

7. This child has been working with glue too much.

8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.

9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.

These are actual comments made by 16 Police Officers. The comments were taken

off actual police car videos around the country:

16 'You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through.'

15 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them awhile.'

14 'If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document.'
13 'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.'
12 'Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you.'

11 'You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?'

10 'Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?'
9 'Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket. '

8 'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'
7 'Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.'
6 'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.'
5 'In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.'
4 'How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?'
3 'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can.'

2 'I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.'

AND THE WINNER IS....

1 'You didn't think we gave pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:49 am

You can call this dude whatever you like

Because he doesn’t exist Shocked

the Canadian guy who did this should be working with James Cameron in his next project

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 1:04 pm

Not sure where to put.
But i am gonna bait this one for sure.
Notice where "she" saw me. Laughing

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 1:30 pm

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=He7Ge7Sogrk

Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 12:50 pm

Some years ago, I heard of a tribe of 'vertically-challenged' people, who were only 3 foot tall. They were called the 'Fukawi'. On further research, I learned how they got their name...

The grasses where they lived were 6 foot tall... and they wandered around all day going 'We're the Fukawi' Smile

Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2010 3:10 pm

Kitty with a tiny hat. Cute. Laughing

Posted: Wed Jun 30, 2010 2:32 pm

It's probably not uncommon for City traders to wonder how they burnt so much cash during a drunken night on the town.

But Steve Perkins was left with a bigger black hole in his memory than most when his employer rang one morning to ask what he'd done with $520m of the oil trading firm's money.

How a broker spent $520m in a drunken stupor and moved the global oil price

Posted: Sat Jul 10, 2010 2:03 am

Meerkat wrote:

Some years ago, I heard of a tribe of 'vertically-challenged' people, who were only 3 foot tall. They were called the 'Fukawi'. On further research, I learned how they got their name...

The grasses where they lived were 6 foot tall... and they wandered around all day going 'We're the Fukawi' Smile

It was "Where..." and it was a question... Wink

Posted: Sat Jul 10, 2010 2:39 am

Bessie
An Irish farmer named Seamus had a car accident.

In court, the lorry company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Seamus..

'Didn't you say to the Police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor.

Seamus responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the...'

'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted.. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident,'I'm fine!'?'

Seamus said, 'Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road....'

The solicitor interrupted again and said, 'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question..'

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Seamus's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie'.

Seamus thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the road when this huge lorry and trailer came through a stop sign and hit my trailer right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move..
However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.

Shortly after the accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the policeman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feeling?'

'Now what the F*ck would you have said?

Posted: Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:29 pm

This just can't be real... But I admit I laughed Laughing

NSFW

I got scammed trying to get an ipad on craigslist

Posted: Sun Jul 11, 2010 12:13 am

I just about cried for somebody's soul when I read that.

Posted: Mon Jul 12, 2010 5:49 pm

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