In case I die...

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Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

I just checked into a Holiday Inn and got stuck on the 4th floor. One of my many phobias is being above the ground floor in a hotel and dying in a fire.

I just poured a cocktail and the kids are off to the water park.

Talk me through this.

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:57 pm

If you do die, I know a good barristor who can sort out your estate and make sure your futune is sent to the correct people.

ME!

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:59 pm

Does your phobia concern the hotel on fire or the lift on fire.

If its the lift, there should be no worries, the materials used, resist fire, the shaft has four metal sides, except at each floor, doors are metal, there could be a imitation wooden veneer, on them.
There is a safety brake fitted, that stops the lift, dead in the shaft, if the lift malfunctions.
Lifts do not catch fire, unless some idiot loads it up fully with flammable materials and sets it alight.

Hotels catch fire so make sure you know the way out and read the instructions.

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:07 pm

Count how many doors you pass between your room and the fire exit & walk it with your eyes shut, that way you will be able to escape in the thick black acrid smoke that will fill the corridor in the event of a fire. Laughing

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:13 pm

Some elevators are designed to be used by firefighters. I don't know what the regulations are at your place. Check to see if there's a key switch somewhere that looks like it's not just for lift reservation. If that's the case, the lift is specifically designed to function for a certain time in case of a fire (that includes fire-resistant wiring), and will be one of the first things the firefighters look at.

Besides that, what Fo'andles said. You can't fall down. In the worst case the steel cable gives and you fall a couple inches (there, I'm using 17th century units just to make you feel comfy!) until the safety brakes stop you. Then you're prolly still surrounded by tons of steel and/or concrete.

The worst realistic thing that can happen is that you're stuck and need to pee. Trust me, I've been there.

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

I'm back from the water park to refresh my cocktail. If I die here I leave all of my icons to my mentees to divvy up.

I HATE hotels.

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:35 pm

Make sure your cocktails are the sort that require a lot of ice cubes. Then, when there's a fire, you can melt them and use the resulting water to extinguish said fire.

Failing that, drink yourself into a coma with the cocktails and forget about your worries.
Before you do though, don't forget to take advantage of any porn that they may have to offer on TV.

Baiting Guru Joined: 11 May 2004 Posts: 2163

pour another cocktail

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:43 pm

Holiday Inn, stuck on the 4th floor, phobias, dying in a fire, water park, cocktails. That's got the makings of one of the best N.O.K formats ever. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:59 pm

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:40 pm

don't forget to leave your unexpired premium membership to someone.

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 10:45 pm

I will try to cure ya.

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:06 pm

if you die I'll kill ya.

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 1:34 am

Holy cow, you had me worried there for a minute Pastor Frank.
I recommend either tying all the sheets together now so that you're ready should a fire break out or sleeping in the groundfloor lobby. You should also test all the fire extinguishers in the hotel, just to be sure...

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 3:44 am

Call the front desk NOW and tell them you have very bad knees due to recent surgery (replacement, ACL/PCL tear, etc.) and you really need a 1st floor room. You are a professional baiter!! Act like one. Also telling them you are diabetic and need a refridgerator for insulin will get you a room witha a fridge often times (no offense given to those with that terrible disease, just a travel trick).

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

I'm back in the room and somewhat intoxicated. I'll let you know if I survive the night. Watching SNL now, it hasn't been funny since the 70's.

Edity: I'm hammered drunk.

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 4:38 am

PF, you have nothing to worry about!

I was staying at the Mark Hopkins in SFO about ten years ago and the fire alarm went off. Fortunately it was 3:30 am. They cleared the alarm and people started to go back in and it went off again.

I decided to get dressed before exiting the hotel. Many guests were not as clear thinking and were out in the pajamas or with blankets wrapped around them.

The fire trucks came (eventually) and the fire fighters checked things out, it took over an hour and a half to clear the building and ascertain that there was NO fire. It had something to do with remodeling that was underway and a wiring problem.

We got to go back inside some time after 5:00. Yay! Standing outside in San Francisco in the dead of the night street lights shrouded in fog with people in their pajamas complaining about being cold. Duh!

It made the business meeting at 8:00 quite interesting. Needless to say the coffee bar was busy.

I hope this helps you be be confident that fire alarms NEVER go off in hotels, and they can never be wrong... they can never be wrong... they can never be wrong...

Enjoy your stay! Smile

No, the MH didn't comp us anything for the inconvenience. Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 6:04 am

You have to ask to be comp'ed. If I were PF, I would explain the situation and ask for another round. The worst thing they say is no

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 06 Feb 2008 Posts: 720

The smoke will kill you before the fire does

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 7:25 am

I think by the time PF wakes up now he could do with some hints how to cure his hangover.

Drink lots of water, take mineral-rich food and drinks, like tomato juice (NO, NOT a Bloody Mary), avoid coffee.

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 7:53 am

Try to enjoy it. Wink

Fixing phobias = Exposure and cognitive reappraisal

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:40 am

Feh, careful people I've seen it several times. "Pastor Frank" is going to ask us to WU him cash so he can get home to Happy Town in 3...2...1...

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 10:06 am

What you need is a room on a much higher floor and a small hang-glider with which to fly to safety in the event of a fire.

The drop, if the floor is high enough, will allow your hang glider to pick up flying speed before you plummet to your doom.

Or you could just pour another cocktail and watch "The Towering Inferno" on the in-house movie channel Smile

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 1:00 pm

I'd love to invite Pastor Frank to visit me. What shall I do? Hmm... maybe there are free 1st floor rooms here...

ETA: Yes, there are plenty of rooms available. You are welcome, Dear Pastor, with your kids. We also have a nice waterpark in the city.

By the way, I once woke up in a hotel (not Ryugyong) early in the morning when someone was banging on my door. I heard some screaming, too, and it took a few seconds to understand that it wasn't a joke but the neighbour room was in fire. I rushed to the street and saw how a couple from the neighbour room run after me, throwing up. Later a staff member told me they weren't married to one another and now their spouses would find out where they had been and with whom. I could go back to my room later that day and it was in a fine condition. But the other room was all grey and even the TV set was like from a Salvador Dali's painting. The heat of forbidden passion... Rolling Eyes

Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 2:59 pm

wokabo wrote:

...
like tomato juice (NO, NOT a Bloody Mary)
...

Maybe that's why tomato juice never seemed to help. Laughing