Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of Dragons...

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Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 1:19 am

for thou are tasty and good with ketchup...
Just a collection of my short baits that never got anywhere but gave me a good laugh...

Quote:

GOODMAN CO.LTD.
108 FUJIGAOKA ,MEITO-KU
NAGOYA,AICHI 465-0032
Tokyo JAPAN
Attention:
I am delighted to inform you that the above named company is a manufacturing company which is base in Tokyo Japan We manufacture advance hospital equipments (AHE), computer accessories, focal glasses/lens and microchips.,Presently my company wishes to come down to Asia Indian, as we have been made to understand from the Chamber of Trade and Commerce in here that mineral resources are sold in Indian. we want to procure a raw material and if possible site our annex office/industry in your country
due to the nearness of the raw material based on your good recommendation.Our humble purpose of contacting you is to make sure my company does not fall into awful hands in Indian as we like to come through you,because we have not been to Indian before. We also want you to be my company's representative concerning the sitting of our annex
office/industry, which is solely going to be under your supervision, you shall aid the process of construction and incorporation and my company shall go into bilateral
relationship personally with you. We shall come with letters of memorandum of understanding for your official endorsement.We implore you to assist our company to go for confirmation of present price of the said product, to enquires the availability and indigenous price of the raw material.

The company ability was recommended from the Economic desk of the Indian Embassy in Tokyo Japan as a local miner who deals on this mineral in industrial quantity as advertised also by the company in the International Local Miners Brochure when they attended exhibition in Tokyo Japan 2004. Please take note of our specification and price data.
Product required - TANTALITE SOLID MINERAL
Description - PURE WHITE IN COLOR
Size - SOLID LIKE SUGAR CUBE
Int'l standard scale- 5 PIECES = 1UNIT
Int'l Price per unit - US$1,900
Quantity required - 1,500 UNITS
NOTE:
Our representative will be coming for procurement and as soon the price is confirm to us then they will come down with the money for the purchase of the said product and this money will be handed over to you as a representative to our company in Indian.Beware this was the system with our previous dealers in Afghanistan before the recent turmoil that lead to the availability fall.The board of directors unanimously agreed that if we can get an indigenous confirmation of substantial quantity of the raw material and most especially- fair price we shall endorse 7% commission of the total purchase for you as our host representative for the first time. It is important to inform you of the continuity of this transaction because we'll be buying the product four-month intervals for five good years through you then we can discuss how to get landed properties for the establishment of our annex office through you in Indian.We will also like to speak with you on telephone we there for require your direct telephone number.
You can respond through our email
Best regards.
K3nji Mur@se

Japan, huh? Well, I decide to take full advantage of this situation...

And basically I tell him he is stupid

Quote:

貴方は馬鹿です

I had long before checked his IP. Not at all from Japan...Nigeria of course...

Quote:

Hello Perry,

We are so pleased to hear from you for being interested to be our representative. Before we can proceed our company have a procedure to be taken after that we will tell you the next step to be taken. Please fill the following information ;

YOUR FULL NAME ------------

AGE ------------------

MARITAL STATUS --------

HOME ADDRESS--------

WORKING TELEPHONE NUMBER --------

YOUR HOME COUNTRY AND STATE --------

YOUR OCCUPATION --------

DO YOU HAVE YOUR PRIVATE BUSINESS? IF YES INDICATE ---------

We will be waiting to hear back from you so that we can proceed .

Regards,
K3nji Mur@se.

Of course he had completely ignored my insult...not that he understood it anyway.
So, I decided to play Japanese a little longer...

Quote:

YOUR FULL NAME ------------ぺり算

AGE ------------------二十

MARITAL STATUS --------紐

HOME ADDRESS--------隈なく

WORKING TELEPHONE NUMBER --------

YOUR HOME COUNTRY AND STATE --------隈なく

YOUR OCCUPATION --------主君

DO YOU HAVE YOUR PRIVATE BUSINESS? IF YES INDICATE ---------はい

I got a good laugh out of this next one...when the subject line was...
PLEASE GET BACK TO US IN ENGLISH

Quote:

Thanks for taking time to get back to us. Right now we have just discovered your seriousness in the business. Right now you will have to go ahead and get to 2 samples units of the said product ,but according to the India embassy we were told that the good product can be found in both india and africa. you will have to make sugestion on your own where it will be more convinience for you to make enquries. Then we can therefore contact the embassy on your behalf while will get you the contact of the local minners who will help you to get the product. because as soon as you can get 2 samples unit of the said product our representative will come down to your country with the money and inspect it while they will give you the money for the 1,498 units to balance up 1,500.

note;The board of directors unanimously agreed that if we can get an indigenous confirmation of substantial quantity of the raw material and most especially- fair price we shall endorse 7% commission of the total purchase for you as our host representative for the first time. It is important to inform you of the continuity of this transaction because we'll be buying the product four-month intervals for five good years through you then we can discuss how to get landed properties for the establishment of our annex office.

Regards,
K3nji mur@se

Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 1:40 am

My poor Reverend Bl@nchard has fallen from grace in this bait...
I get this email in his box...
subject: I CHOOSE YOU FOR THIS PROJECT

BELOVED PLEASE VIEW THE ATTACHMENT TO VIEW THE PROJECT.
MRS OLIVI@ T@YLOR

Ok, so I will play along.

Quote:

Dearest Olivia,
I am honored I am chosen for this project. Please send me more information.
R.Bl@nchard

You know...for a sick woman...she sure does write a lot...
And the next photo...honestly...it has a watermark...

Quote:

Beloved Rev.R.Blanchard,

I have received your mail and I must first of all show my appreciation over the fact that you have given heed to the entreaty of a dying woman God has a purpose for me giving you this fund to bless the poor and carry-out this mission of reaching out to the less privileged, I have found your email details from the British Africa Red Cross Charity Email Search, (BARCCES).

When I discovered this ailment, it dawned on me that I had been living a very vain life. Then the need to affect the lives of those in need became very paramount in my thoughts. This appears to be a case of mercy after death, as I no longer have the strength to do those things I used to do when I was still very full of life.
My dear Beloved, in my resolve to actualize my dying wish, I have been able to support charity to a very large extent around the Asia and Africa continent.

Then my health became a sorry tale, that at this particular point in time, I live at the mercy of various drugs and operations which certainly cannot remedy anything. My close family members are however not happy with the way I have disbursed everything of mine to the motherless babies and the less privileged. That was why they failed to help me actualize my dream of supporting charity.

They held for themselves the funds I made available and went as far as even trying to terminate my life when the hour (though very short) has not come. All relationship with me has been severed, and they are of the opinion that the last of my fortune has been spent. Incidentally, the sum of Nine million Five hundred thousand dollars (United States) lies in custody of a finance institution in Europe.

That is the last i have here on earth, when I shall be no more. These funds i wish to entrust to you, to help propagate the works of charity wherever your location is, By so doing, I would need your utmost sincerity and honesty to carry the venture along successfully. Beloved God see the heart of all men, I assure you that this is not a worldly thing, and I beckon on you to make use of these funds to the glory of God.
It would be required of you to furnish my doctor with the following details

FULL NAME
CONTACT ADDRESS
DIRECT PHONE/FAX NUMBER
AGE AND OCCUPATION

to enable me put a letter to the security company making you the eligible beneficiary to the funds with them.

Details of My Doctor
Name: Doctor D@vid B3nton

Mississippi Hospital.

Due to my poor health, I have instructed my doctor to help me process a letter of Authority in your name. Once this is done, you shall make arrangements with them on how the funds would be transferred to your location. I strongly advice that you deal with my doctor directly and feel free to ask him any thing you wish to know as I could not spend much time on the net any more.. Once you are in contact with my doctor he will furbish you with every details you need to know.

I beg of you to deal with me honestly and render me your assistance to the fullest of your capacity as you would be helping a dying woman. Most importantly you would be touching the lives of a huge number of people in your country.

Attached is my picture I took with my Rev Father.

I hope I would be able to count on you while I wait impatiently for the time to come. My bones are slowly cleaving to my skin.
I hope to hear from you as soon as possible.

Warmest Regards,
Mrs. Olivia T@ylor

Ewww...my Reverend has a sick fetish...obviously for old women in hospitals...

Quote:

Dearest Olivia,
It saddens me to see you in such a state...
I did not realize how beautiful a lady you are.
Are you currently seeing anyone?
R.Bl@nchard

Awww, how sad...she doesnt feel this attraction...

Quote:

Hello Rev,
I am just alone with my God please kindly contact my doctor he will explain more to you.
thank you.

Reverend feels the rejection...

Quote:

Olivia! I am heartbroken! Are you rejecting me?

Ok, I will contact the doctor...
Reverend really is a naughty boy...

Quote:

Dear Doctor David,
Olivia told me to email you.
Olivia also told me you enjoy bondage. Is this true?
Please reply asap!
Yours,
R.Bl@nchard

The doctor is confused of what the Reverends intentions are...

Quote:

what do you mean?

Reverend starts to get to the point...

Quote:

Olivia said there was a lot of money involved in this thing.
How much longer do you expect for her to live?

doctor is still confused...are you sure you went to medical school...? Laughing

Quote:

Please I need you to go straight to the point, what is it that you want or talking about send me a detail mail please.

Dr.B3nton

Ok...I got to the point...and he did not respond back...

Quote:

David,
Here are the details. If you kill Olivia I will split the money with you 50/50. How does that sound? Can you make it quick?I have a lot of debts I need to pay.

But it was a good laugh!

Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:26 am

I have some that are short and sweet.

This one started from the trash bin as usual. I got a bite.

I gave him the I'm too busy running my shop line.. Do you have any African art?

He replied. The attached photos are of paintings all about the size of postage stamps.

Quote:

HELLO SIR
SORRY ABOUT THE DELAY IN WRITING YOU, I WAS OUT OF TOWN FOR PURCHASING OF MATERIALS,
YES I WOULD LOVE YOU HELP ME MARKET MY ART WORKS, AND MAY BE WE COULD WORK TOGETHER
AS PARTNERS, I SELL ART WORKS TO AMERICANS BUT THEY LIKE PAYING ME WITH CHEQUES.
SO IM IN NEED OF A PARTNER WHO COULD HELP ME HANDLE SITUATIONS THERE.
I WOULD BE EXPECTING YOUR REPLY SOON, HERE ARE MY ART WORKS.

REGARDS
WILLIAMS

It looked like a check cashing scam, but I am not interested in the money, just the art. I complain about the size.

Quote:

Thanks for the scans. They are way too small to evaluate. I will need high resolution photos showing detail like this sample photo of thread work.

Tell me about your camera. What brand and model is it? Can it take macro photos at several resolutions? I will want some detail photos to show the brush strokes.

I attached a full size uncompressed photo of the detail on some bobin lace from a craft fair. It was shot with a 2MP camera.

He didn't reply, so a week later I tried poking him. Maybe he forgot me.

Quote:

Brian

Did you get my last mail? Are you OK? Tell me about your art and camera.

and again

Quote:

Brian,

Are you still interested in selling African art?

Oh yea.. I would love to sell you art..

Quote:

Hello Randy,
Sorry about the delay in response, i have been too busy putting so many things in other, and i have been a little bit far fro the computer, sure im allways ready to sell my art works.
Williams/

One small problem.. I still need photos. I had a trip over the weekend so needed an excuse to ignore the mail for a while, so I have a business trip.

Quote:

I'm on a business/pleasure trip at the moment and will be returning over the weekend. I'm spending the week on Grand Cayman. I'm picking up some local art at the pure art gallery.

http://www.pureart.ky/

They have some great local art and photography. The wall dive shots are outstanding.

I'll visit Church's art tomorrow.

Are you able to do some macro photography for me? I can send sample photos of the type of detail I need to evaluate your artwork.

I have oils, acrylics, photos, carvings, blown glass, ceramics, and oriental pieces I can photograph and send samples. I will want you to duplicate my sample quality for your art.

Do you still have my sample photo of the doily? (the fine thread piece)

No reply. A poke a few days later after my trip provided no reply. I don't think he was really interested in selling me art. Idea

Posted: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:37 am

Another out of the trash scam. This is another box of money for my favorite charity scam. He sends me the details on what he is looking for.

I suggested he just send the money to his favorite charity. He can't.. Are you surprised?

Quote:

Dear Me,

I cannot just send the money to any charity organization for two reasons:

(1) I deposit the (Consignments ) money with an Asset Management Company, and
the company does not know that the consignments contains money, during the
process of deposit I decleared the content of the Consignments as Personal
Effect, so someone has to claim the consignments first from the Asset
Management Company before making the distribution.

(2) I need someone to supervise the distribution of the money, I can just send
the money to any charity organization without knowing how the money is been
spent, that is why I am contacting you to do this for me.

Waiting fro your reply.

Regards,

I became busy with a piggy possibility so I ditched him by being very helpful. So sorry I am unqualified to help in that regard. Very Happy

Quote:

Dear Zeferino,

A probate attorney should know someone who can handle the legal issues much better than I can. Due to the amount at stake, someone who can provide proper legal representation will be much better equipped to hand this to ensure your wishes are carried out to your satisfaction.

A lawyer with a proper power of attorney will be able to handle this for you. It would be best handled by someone close to the asset management company rather than someone far away. What is the name and street address of the office of the asset management company? I could look up and evaluate the ratings of several legal firms in the area for you and provide you with the ratings. I'll do that free of charge for you.

Good luck.

no reply

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