Corrupt a wish Genie

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Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 4:31 pm

granted, that girl who sits next to decides to sit so close one of her legs is practically over yours, you take a peek down and notice her skirt is now so short you can practically see everything. unfortunatly it seems you mistook her for a girl. Rincewind, meet barry, the crossdresser. but you can call him Barbara........

I wish someone else would finish this work for me

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 4:32 pm

Granted - That's when you find out "she's" a transvestite

I wish the new phone I'm waiting on would arrive

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 5:53 pm

Granted but on it seems that during the delivery process, it managed to be broken in half.

I wish I my friends didn't live so far away.

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 6:06 pm

Granted, They all stay at your house, eat all your food, dump in your toilet and trash the place.

i wish my new phone hadn't arrived broken in half

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 6:16 pm

Granted - It arrived broken in 4 pieces.

I wish that vacuum cleaner hadn't fallen on my thumb (hurts like hell).

If you are wondering how I can make a vacuum cleaner fall on my thumb, try balancing it on the top of the stairs and then clean the bottom thread.

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 6:30 pm

Granted. Instead of the vacuum falling on you. You fell down the stairs, broke some glass and broke your arm.

I wish I wasn't so shy around people.

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 7:15 pm

Granted and you suddenly feel that you can quite comfortably walk down the street naked whilst smiling at people. After being sprayed in the face by a woman using a can of hairspray the police are called.

I wish I could get into my book 'Nation' by Terry Pratchett

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 7:24 pm

Granted, you read every book by Terry Pratchett and made so harsh critics toward the book that the rabid fan-girls found you, murdered you, and threw in you in a trash compacter.

I wish I could make extremists and rabid fan-girls (and guys) disappear into a black hole of death!

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 7:31 pm

Granted. As of now you can, but you're too shy to expose yourself actually doing it.

I wish the world was free of hunger, war, terror, fights, hate, envy, idiocy (give or take a squirrel or 2), ugliness, and smelly feet

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 7:35 pm

Granted. The world has become quite a boring place to live in that nobody knows what to do. The world becomes so overpopulated that people need to be murdered to keep the balance in tact, and thus going back to hunger, war, terror, fights etc.

I wish I owned all of Switzerland

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:22 pm

The lawyer who prepared the documents of ownership, whom you trusted despite the bad English and that he wanted outrageously large fees paid by Western Union, actually confused Switzerland with Swaziland.

I wish that someone would drop an anvil (from a great height) on Rush Limbaugh.

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 10:24 pm

Granted, he splits into two and has twice the listenership and is on the radio twice a day.

I wish I were an Olympic athlete,

Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 10:38 pm

But it's in synchronised swimming, which is universally derided.

I wish that people would stop using "refute" to mean "deny".

Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 6:40 pm

granted because I can't refute your request. But everyon'es posts now get auto corrected if they type 'deny'

I wish I could type words quickly and correctly

Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 9:34 pm

Well, so you can but now you've forgotten the use of the space bar andnowallthewordsyouutypearebunchedtogetherlikethis.

I wish that George Lucas would apologise for the creation of Jar Jar Binx.

Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 10:52 pm

Your wish is granted, Jar Jar Binx is no more. It it's place is a strange specie of hairless Wookie.

I wish I had the means to travel at will.

Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 10:57 pm

You can do that, but have no control over where you end up...

I wish that the man who invented the phrase "Freedom Fries" woukl choke to death on one.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 4:47 am

Granted but you would have to be his pall bearer.

I wish someone would submit a post with political undertones so I can lock this thread.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 7:55 am

Granted, but it's in another thread so this one will live forever.

I wish it would stop raining and the sun would start to shine.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 8:40 am

You are blamed for the onset of drought and have to go into hiding.

I wish that "celebrity scandals" would involve something actually worth getting incensed over.

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 5:12 pm

All tabloid magazines now feature a "scandal" section where Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, and Jeniffer Aniston are apart of. People are so sick of reading about them every issue that they decide to stop buying tabloid magazines (and thus putting the tabloid magazine companies out of business) and decide to get out their pitch forks and go after all 3 of the celebrities. In which they are shunned and striped of their fame and are incensed. But 3 more annoying celebrities take their place.

I wish I didn't have a severe stomach ache right now!

Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 8:36 pm

There's now this big hole where you stomach once was - damned aliens and their painless surgery methods.

I wish that someone would make a big-budget version of The War Of The Worlds that is not set in modern times but in the 1900s, and takes place in England and not America.

Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:39 am

Granted, but the budget was so huge it stretched to hiring real aliens who didn't understand the concept of acting and totally flattened Manchester.

I wish I didn't now have to make another wish.

Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:55 am

Granted - you just have to make a wish later.

I wish they'd stop making sequels that destroy superb originals - we saw what happened after The Matrix and Highlander.

Posted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 11:42 am

Your wish is granted -- sequels are no longer made because now all the originals totally suck.

I wish this game would NEVER end.