I love it when lads try to lecture me.

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Not quite a Newb Joined: 22 Jan 2010 Posts: 45

So I was trying to get this lad to join my church. He was very positive, as you can see here:

Quote:

Dear Beloved Vain Edward Peter Nis,

i will be so much willing to join the church of Elongated Pleasure in order to complete this affair,as longer as you will be trustworthy,i am also Bone again christian tungs talker, though my father was a Muslim but my mum is christian and she is the one who trained me and i find the truth and became a christian, note as soon as this fund is transfer to you, we will first of all pay tithe before sharing and investing the balance.

please tell me your procedure? and any thing you need from me i will provide to you, all my trust is in you now because i know when this fund is transfer to you that you will not sit on it because you are a believer and christian brother, i will be waiting to hear from you also send your details contact to me for easy communication.

i will send the deposit slip which my client use to deposit the fund and after hearing from you i will then draft a latter of application which you will send to the bank here for claim.

i look forward to hear from you.
Regards
4bu Mus4.

So I send him the grand church form, which is obviously neccesary.

What's his reply?

Quote:

My dear V4in 3dward Pet3r N1s,
i have going through your attached form,however i dont think all the question is necessary before we cam start the transaction i proposed to you, to be honest with you i am an Attorney i dont have time to fill this form because i think its not necessary so if for that reason you will not assist me in this deal, then let me look for another assistant.
God bless you.
Mr.4bu Mus4 (Esq)

Odd, you were so positive before... But of course, the form is absolutely neccesary.

Quote:

is your church different from other church of God? my bible tells me that we are one body in Christ Jesus,so if your church is helping only there members i dont have any problem with the, i have a church that i worship with and i am a coed member i can leave it to join your church because of business that will benefit you and i,if you or your church is not willing to assist me i dont have problem,the question you ask in the form doesn't prove you are real church of God.
Thanks You.

Odd, my bible doesn't tell me to steal money from well-meaning churches. I explain to him that we are unique, as we have Ger4ld G. G0dfull, the TRUE MOUTH OF GOD, the only person who can interpret the bible.

Quote:

Have you hear about Bishop David Oyedepo? his my spiritual father i can not exchange my God with any thing.

No I haven't.

I've informed him that I find the forms stupid but that they're a neccesary formality.

I mean, I realize he's too lazy to fill them out, but where does he think he's getting by becoming upset? He's the one trying to scam me, it's not like I actually need him, and I haven't even slapped him.

Maybe he just didn't like the part with the alternatives "Ger4ld G. G0dfull", "Pope Benedict XVI" and "Hulk Hogan".

Posted: Mon Mar 01, 2010 3:27 pm

Quote:

Bone again christian tungs talker

eh??, sounds fantastic.
Well if you are a bone again christian tungs talker then I'm a Mukslim fund .. er .. mental pissed.
LOL, this guy is the best ever.
Can I have him .. please Smile

Not quite a Newb Joined: 22 Jan 2010 Posts: 45

wowwow wrote:

Quote:

Bone again christian tungs talker

eh??, sounds fantastic.
Well if you are a bone again christian tungs talker then I'm a Mukslim fund .. er .. mental pissed.
LOL, this guy is the best ever.
Can I have him .. please Smile

ab u15 musa @h otma il.c om

Remove spaces (duh).

Enjoy.

Original mail:

Quote:

Dear Friend,

I got your contact through a discreet search from the Internet, hence i decided to contact you for a business that will benefit me and you. My name is Abu Musa, the lawyer of late Mr. David Stevens, a wealthy white farmer who was murdered on the land dispute in Zimbabwe. I have no doubt you may be aware of the Zimbabwe Land Reform conflict by President Robert Mugabe; if you read the BBC or CNN news online you can find some documented pictures of this incident.

Before the death of my client, he had traveled to Accra-Ghana to deposit the sum of US$12M (Twelve million United States Dollars) in one of the banks in Ghana, due to the looming danger in Zimbabwe. The money was meant for the purchase of new machineries, chemicals etc. for the farms and establishment of his new farm in Swaziland.

The land problem came when Zimbabwean President Mr. Robert Mugabe introduced a new land act reform, which wholly affected the rich white farmers and some few black farmers. This resulted in the killing and mob action of Zimbabwean war veterans and some lunatics in the society. In fact a lot of people were killed because of this land reform act, of which my client was one of the victims.

It is against this background that since i have all the documents relating to the deposit of the funds here in Ghana, I have decided to seek for an honest foreigner whom I can entrust this fund to that’s why I have contacted you through this media. Since I wouldn’t like to front myself to receive the money directly, for security reasons I want to make you the beneficiary of the funds, so that you can stand as my late client’s foreign business associate/relative, and i will testify to enable the bank transfer the funds to any bank account of your choice, and me and you will share the money.

I must also let you know that this transaction is risk free because i have all the proof documents with me, of which when we progress i will send to you for review.

I intend to use the money for investment and growth in your country or any other country you may suggest under your kind advice. I have two options for you(1.)For your assistance/commitment you will earn US$3.6 Million(30%)of the total sum (US$12 Million) or(2.)You can go into partnership with me in any business we shall decide to invest in your country or elsewhere. Please let me know which one you prefer.

If you are interested to work with me and benefit yourself from it also, i want you to reply quickly and send me your personal telephone and fax numbers, to enhance more effective communication and I will tell you the procedure for the claiming of the funds.

Finally, I want you to treat this matter as urgency because we don't have time in our hands. I am daring need to relocate to your country as soon as we complete this transaction since I cannot invest the money here in order to avoid rising of eyebrows on me.

I am looking forward to your quick reply.
Regards,
4bu Mus4

Posted: Mon Mar 01, 2010 3:48 pm

LOL, his Bishop has a full inbox, hopefully full of scam complaints.

Quote:

<[email protected]>: cannot update mailbox /var/mail/contact
for user contact. error writing message: File too large
Reporting-MTA: dns; mail.davidoyedepoministries.org
X-Postfix-Queue-ID: BF2AAD0675
X-Postfix-Sender: rfc822;
Arrival-Date: Sun, 28 Feb 2010 22:53:22 -0800 (PST)

Final-Recipient: rfc822; [email protected]
Original-Recipient: rfc822;[email protected]
Action: failed
Status: 5.2.2
Diagnostic-Code: x-unix; input/output error

Posted: Mon Mar 01, 2010 4:40 pm

Here is David Oyedepo's web page:

http://www.davidoyedepoministries.org/

He also has a wikipedia entry.

While he is involved in movement called the "prosperity gospel" of which I do not approve, he does seem to be legitimately a Christian minister.

I recommend that he be treated as an innocent third party in your bait.

Bruin

Not quite a Newb Joined: 22 Jan 2010 Posts: 45

Well, it's interesting that the lad brought him up. Legitimacy grasping, maybe?

... Or, god forbid, maybe he was genuinely upset?

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