Panning for gold in the rivers of Nigeria

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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 4:59 pm

i have set myself up as an inventor of a low-tech device which can extract gold particles from rivers.
and it turns out that any river within 10 miles of a scammer is particularly rich in gold.

i've contacted a few scammers to confirm my willingness to help with their schemes,
just as soon as they have helped me with mine.
all i need is a little help to build a prototype and measure the amount of gold it collects.
then, the uk government will release the grant it has promised to me, and i will be able to share that money with the scammer.

of course, i will need photos to make sure he builds it right.

there's only one outstanding matter - i still need a design, maybe based on an empty oil drum or some other container.
if anyone wants to suggest a design, please contact me at r2d2.419 AT gmail DOT com

Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 5:13 pm

Here's a link to page on gold boxes.

Link to box

Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 5:36 pm

Another use for supercharged phones! They ionize and attract gold particles within 1 km of the user!

Just wade out into the river, stick a pure copper rod in the mud, then stand next to the rod and talk on the phone for 6 hours. Average yield in a major crocodile-infested river: 1/2 oz per hour. Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 5:53 pm

^^I like the idea of integrating a cell phone. Maybe a box with an open end for collecting water and a screen on the other for filtering out the gold. Inside, there should be a car battery connected to coils of copper wire wound around a cell phone. That will attract the gold particles.

I'm pretty sure you can waterproof a cell phone by coating it with Vaseline. Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 6:19 pm

No. You waterproof and supercharge it at the same time.
Microwave on full power for 10 mins. Wink

Master Baiter Joined: 09 Apr 2009 Posts: 166

Always remember to incorporate the proper safety signage.

Safety First!

Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 6:38 pm

Tuco wrote:

Another use for supercharged phones! They ionize and attract gold particles within 1 km of the user!

Just wade out into the river, stick a pure copper rod in the mud, then stand next to the rod and talk on the phone for 6 hours. Average yield in a major crocodile-infested river: 1/2 oz per hour. Laughing

Such a good idea could only come from Tuco.

Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:02 am

thank you for these great ideas guys Smile

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 3:52 pm

i now have one lad who seems prepared to make a prototype.
he has asked me what materials he will need.

as we are collecting gold, i am very tempted to introduce him to the 'Goldschmidt reaction'.
it sounds like it is concerned with gold, but actually it uses aluminium powder, iron oxide (rust) and an ignition source.
this is highly reactive (it produces molten iron), so i'm just wondering what (if any) warning i should give. eg.
- stand well back and wear safety googles, or
- hold it in your hands and demonstrate in front of an audience

read more about it [here]

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:14 pm

Instructions to lad:

1) Place in underwear.
2) Ignite

Posted: Thu Feb 04, 2010 11:53 am

nice idea sunshine - what gave you the idea? Wink

i sent instructions on how to build the gold-collector device using an oil drum and lots of household chemicals and other items,
and a cheeky lad replied with a one-liner...

Quote:

The prototype is ready and i did all you said.

obviously he hasn't built anything, he just wants me to hand over some of the grant money i claim to have applied for.

i've asked him 'is the water bubbling?'
and if he answers 'yes' then i will tell him that is a bad sign and he needs to dismantle then rebuild the device,
but this time taking photos so i can advise on whether any steps have been performed wrongly.

and if he answers 'no' then i will tell him the same thing Smile

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