2010 Valentines Day Be My Lust Object Thread

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Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 3:08 am

Fishing is fun!

Maybe I could convince Corona to keep me heated up while I'm fishin'?

A few nice size Perch, deepfried or boiled. If you haven't had Midwestern U.S. fish fry, you haven't had fish yet. Very Happy

Missed you all day sweetness...

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:25 am

^^^
I know your big heart is true
Down deep in the heart right thru

Fret not if I do sway
My heart is in a fray

There are many of loves
In this facility of doves

I really hope you understand
That my heart is in quicksand
Cool

Thank you suicide for bringing out fish
If I had you with me, I'd make you a dish Very Happy

Oh my dear dear scam of a lot
There's fish in that river, I kid you not! Wink

Ima, Ima, I hope you do see
That jose has the love from me Cool

Sis, sis, your feet are no concern
It's tits you have that make me burn Laughing

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 7:33 am

Aww DW, darling, old-school electric guitars. You truly know the way to my heart.

Until I find the time to finish another woo for you (which might take a bit of time, as I wouldn't even dare to think of offering you anything less than the finest woos the human race has ever seen), allow me to borrow the voice of Paul Stanley to tell you how I feel about you.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 12:52 pm

My Sweet Beautiful princess who I love and adore
Sorry that I have not had time to woo you some more
I have been busy tending to those who need me
But I do love you so and I know that you see

When Ralph leaves me alone I'll woo you some more
On Scamwarners he is becomming quite a post whore
Even without words you know how much I love you
and when I have some more time I will resume my woo

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:51 pm

@Corona -

It's Ok,
I understand,
He's quite the wooer,
That crooning cowboy,
Jose.

However,
That leaves Ima standing,
with nothing to do,
Wonder if she would mind,
some amateur woo!

Or perhaps DQ,
With those beautiful
...uh...er,
eyes.

She could be a Cinderella,
if we find the right size,
shoe.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:57 pm

I love you badger boo
The bestest wooer too

Very Happy

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:07 pm

I just finished up a very long and very emotional Skype chat with Slightly. You may have noticed that he has been conspicuously absent from the VD thread this year. At first he told me it is because he is too important for such trivialities, but after pressing him for a bit, he admitted that he is very insecure and worried that no one here would want him for a Valentine. I think we all need to dig deep in our hearts and show him that we can see the kind and lovable person trapped in that calloused shell he has imprisoned himself in.

Show him you care by sending this image via PM, with no explanation. He'll know exactly what it means.

If you can't stand him, tell him to f*ck off by sending him this one:

If you couldn't care less, or if you have no idea who he is, send both.

Click here to PM Slightly right now.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:27 pm

Do not wurry Murry, Sweetcakes Sultan of Woo so true,
I know exactly what ya mean, just so much else to do.
That Ralph is a task master as well as a strutting bingo stud,
He is nothing but a post whore - it must be in his blood.

Do this - check that - send a link - he is driving me up the wall,
With his, vics cum first always*, clarion call.
But his heart is definitely golden, he really does care,
There will certainly be more woos a'coming cuz you have such flair.

* (Of course they do!)

Wink

A note to Eater Males. Raise your game!

Someone once famously said (obviously a female) we do what we can.
Very true indeedie, and what is more - we do so much more than a mere man.

Now don't think I am man-bashing** but the woos need some more of what we are after,
Else on Valentines Day Darnce Nite you may well end up with a male partner.

** (I am really!)

Rolling Eyes

@ Lucious Luckey - isn't SOOI that one that used to be all awesome and hertero***

*** (spelled with a her!)

Laughing

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:31 pm

Cathartic Kate wrote:

@ Lucious Luckey - isn't SOOI that one that used to be all awesome and hertero***

*** (spelled with a her!)

Laughing

On the outside, yes. Unfortunately, all of that puffery and bravado is masking some serious pain. Inside, he's a fragile, delicate flower. He needs sunshine and nurturing from us.

PM now, operators are standing by.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:41 pm

I love you, Slightly!

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:49 pm

Based on Luckey's guidelines above, I sent Slightly a bottle of Diamond White cider, known in these parts as 'Trampagne'.

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

luckey wrote:

Inside, he's a fragile, delicate flower. He needs sunshine and nurturing from us.

He really is. Dainty is a word I'd use to describe him. (if I wanted to be slapped).

He is included on my list of men in green that I have a little crush on, by the way. Yes, I have a soft spot for the squirrel. One of the reasons that I haven't wooed him is that I'm a bit afraid of his possible replies. Embarassed

(plus, I have my hands full with Snerd and Juan).

I do think he needs wooing, though. Surely someone else is up to the task?

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:55 pm

I love you also, Roy!
You are such a joy. Cool

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 6:12 pm

Aagh! Please see my thoughts on the whole loveydoveyness thing on page 12.

Thanks anyway Corona, I thought I was invisible Smile

I hope noone rhymes Corona and boner.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 7:02 pm

^^^

Corona and boner - surely no-one would dare.

Wink

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1489566#1489566

Opppppppppsieeeeeeeee

Laughing

What next Roy - and Toyboy?

Cool

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:02 pm

PM sent, Luckey. I hope we are not too late!

@ Corona -

Thank you,
Sweetie,
I feel the same way too... Wink

@ Kate -

What is it you girls are looking for,
We men would walk for miles,
Ask door to door,
Spend many smiles,
If we knew,
What,
You were looking for.

It's the question of the ages! Very Happy

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:23 pm

@ Bold and sensational Badgerbaitbabe

THE QUESTION...........

My take is............

Quote:

The person I love would dare and care and share everything,

Would be comfortable just to be themselves and require nothing more of me than just being me,

They would enjoy everything on offer and be able to know whenever I wanted love or help or praise,

They would know what picks me up and would spend all night snuggling and sharing silliness as well as discussing matters of import,

My partner would smile and sparkle as I smile and sparkle and want nothing more.

That is the person I do and will adore forever.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:39 pm

Dear SOOI, I love you as much as I possibly can, being a straight male with no desire to try anything funny to see if I like it. So often you amuse by saying what others only dare to think... not unlike the guy who isn't afraid to belch loudly after having had a good beer and never cares about the reproachful looks he gets, because he knows that deep down, everybody finds it funny but is too afraid to admit it.

Having said that, dude, you're obviously badly in need of a hug and / or good shag.

And now for something completely different. I need your advice. Do you think this menu I've composed for VD is good enough to bait DW? It may look like it's a bit much, but after the meal DW will be able to rest for at least two hours while I give her a pedicure and a full body massage.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:42 pm

If you can say "Yeah, that's me" to any two from this list, you've passed my test and I'll consider you.

1. Breathing.
2. Got a pulse.
3. Female.

Tick three and we may as well be married already.

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:46 pm

^^^

What about:
4. Finds farting funny

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

^^^ Fart's are funny. Laughing

Way to go Bankster. Thumbs up

Aww Badgerbait! Thanks for worrying about my shoes. You are writing some very fine woos. Wink

Now onto 2010 Valentines Day Be My Lust Object Thread

Well I missed my lust objects really bad today. So I wrote a few words for my sweeties.

My dearest Juan
I thought of this while I was mowing your lawn
I try hard not to stare when I know you are there
I just can't help it I have to breath your same air
It makes me so happy I wish I had a lock of your hair

Then I could lay it next to me on the pillow at night
Pretending it was you holding me so tight
Then I could have sweet loving dreams of you all night
Being with you till the daylight is bright

I took some of your clothes I hope you don't mind
They still smelled of you and it was so fine
It made me so happy and it felt so divine
Like a light and lovely beautiful shimmering wine

Now I know you might think me crazy
Loving you makes my mind kinda hazy
I never want you to think that my love is lazy
So I will always show you I care
Even if it makes you a little bit scared

You know
this is true.

My other lust object too sexy Jose
You are a cowboy who knows his way
Around the inside of a womans mind
You know how to make her think of your grind
Your steamy words of hot desire can make a woman blind
To all the other attentions she might soon find

I can't wait to take a ride with you
I will hold on tight I'm sure you know just what to do
A cowboy as fine as you won't leave a girl feeling blue
I'm sure she will never be able to forget you

Now get that horse ready to ride
I know your gonna like being by my side
A fine cowgirl I do make
I'm sure you know it's not a mistake

Now roping and riding is lots of fun
Especially after the sun goes down
Some might hear you yell all the way into town
There will be no help for you not even a clown

I believe in this and this too Wink

ETA: Had to comment on fart's. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:48 pm

Otter, and I thought I had low standards. Laughing

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 9:51 pm

@Darling Kate-

Lest I step on Murry's toes,
Here your theory,
Expounded,
Goes:

After reading your quotation,
I left me with a need for postulation.

You are seeking,
It seems to me,
One fourth comfortable in own skin,
On fourth giver and taker,
Equally divided,
One fourth warm and funny,
Yet able to discuss matters,
Regardless of what mood you may be in.
Lastly,
One Fourth astronomer,
To gaze at your heavenly body,
Sparkly and sunny.

I have a picture of such a person, you see...

Quite simply me! Cool

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 22 Jan 2010 Posts: 85

Well I am planning my Valentines Day Evening meal. I bought a Nice bottle of Wine, some rose pettals to put on the floor, in some bath water, and on the bed. I got some wood for the fire place. put together some nice love songs to play on the Surround sound. Now the only thing missing is some company.
Tim

Posted: Mon Feb 01, 2010 10:35 pm

Suicide King wrote:

Now the only thing missing is some company.

Like that ever stopped me. Laughing

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