Double Christmas Safari in a Muslim Country

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Posted: Sat Dec 26, 2009 11:44 pm

Y'all remember P.P3t3rs of Blitz-TripleSafari fame? He and I have been using our good ol' Nodo modality on a new lad who, today we find, has made the lovely 300-or-so mile trip from Accra to Abidjan with his buddy. By the time they get back, they'll have, between the two of them, covered 1200 mugu miles (about 1900 km).

Quote:

HELLO DAVID,

MY REPRESENTATIVE WILL BE WITH YOU TOMORROW BEEN SATURDAY MY DEAR, I CANT ADOUNDOR YOU AND PASTOR PET3R ONLY MAKE SURE YOU WILL BE DEAR TO WAIT FOR US, DONT FAIL. I WILL ALSO GIVE YOU A CALL IF IT WILL REACH YOU. DONT WORRY, WE ARE WITH YOU NOTHING WILL HAPPEN TO PASTOR PET3R HE WILL NOT DIE. WAIT FOR US FROM 3PM TO 6PM SATURDAY.

THANKS AND REMAIN BLESS

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Date: Fri, 25 Dec 2009 12:58:45 -0800 (PST)
From: Ses3 Zugulv <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: d@vid

Quote:

HELLO DAVID.

MY REPRESENTATIVE IS IN THE IVORY COTE SINCE THURSDAY AND CANNOT FOUND YOU. WHAT IS ALL THIS IS? NOW IS SORT OF MONEY? PLEASED ASK THE CAFE MAN TO GIVE YOU NORMAL ADDRESS SO HE CAN FOUND YOU. AS SOON AS YOU MEET HIM FILL FREE TO HAND HIM OVER THE GIFT AND THE MONEY.

WE HELD A BOARD MEETING AND NOW FINALISE TO BRING THE GOLD TO IVORY COTE. BECAUSED OF PASTOR PET3R SICKNESS HE CANNOT BE ABLE TO TRAVEL BY ROAD? HE NEEDED A REST.. WILL HAVE 6 KILO OF GOLD BAR AND I KILO OF ALLUVIAL GOLD DUST FOR YOU.

AS SOON AS OUR REPRESENTATIVE RETURE WITH THE MONEY ON MONDAY. WE WILL TRANSPORT IT BY ROAD WITH ME AND THE REST OF THE BOARD DIRECTORS TO IVORY COST SO YOU AND PASTOR PETER WILL GO BACK TO THE STATE BEFORE SUNDAY NEXT WEEK. AM WAITING FOR THE MONEY WE HAVE NO TIME TO WAST I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I SAID. PACKEG THE MONEY VERY WELL REMOVE 5.000 DOLLAR FROM IT IS FOR YOUR EXPENCES TILL I MEET YOU ON THURSDAY NEXT WEEK WITH THE GOLD SO YOU GUYS CAN NOW TRAVEL WITH IT FROM THEY. OUR REPRESENTATIVE NAME IS EVANG. J0SEPH. THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU.

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Date: Sat, 26 Dec 2009 05:45:07 -0800 (PST)
From: Sese Zugulv <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: d@vid

URGENT!!!!

Quote:

HELLO DAVID,

PLEASE THE REPRESENTATIVE CAN'T LOCATE YOUR PLACE YOU ARE CALLING BLVD ASS0UAN. KINGLY FIND A LOCAL NUMBER AND CALL MY REPRESENTATIVE ON THIS NUMBER: xxxxxxxx HE'S WAITING TO MEET YOU TO FACILITATE THE TRANSACTION: HIS NAME EVANGELIST J0SEPH. HE WANTED TO JOIN YOU AT RIV1ERA 3 ROUND ABOUT CLOSE TO BOULEVARD ASS0UAN. ARRANGE ANOTHER TIME FOR THIS. IT IS VERY URGENT. PICK ANY TAXI AND ASK FOR RIV1ERA 3 OR NEUF KILO.

Quote:

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Date: Sat, 26 Dec 2009 09:42:27 -0800 (PST)
From: Sese Zugulv <[email protected]>
Subject: URGENT!!!!

And, for some extra fun, we got a few voicemails from Joe.

Voicemail 1
Voicemail 2
Voicemail 3

I've spoken to Zugu many times in the past, so I recognize his voice well enough. Well, at least enough to know that that is not him. BUT, in the second voicemail, right at the end, you can hear Zug's voice.

I would say that the combination of that, along with the shift in IP and the occasional slips of "we" and "us" (they were much more frequent in the letters preceding), is enough to say that there were definitely two lads that traveled.

On a significantly more self-centered note, this is my 10th and 11th safari. I've crossed the line into double digits.
happy crowd

Furthermore, much props to my partner in crime, who's only been baiting for 3 or 4 months, and already has 5 safaris under his belt. That's an average of more than one per month. Not a bad track record, I'd say.
beers!

Posted: Sat Dec 26, 2009 11:48 pm

Well done guys!!! Thumbs up

Posted: Sat Dec 26, 2009 11:50 pm

Goddamnit Nick, don't you ever get enough of all those safari hats? Very Happy

You're a bloody machine! Brilliant baiting man, congrats to you and your partner in crime.

PS: you should try romance baiting Wink

Posted: Sun Dec 27, 2009 12:08 am

Cool stuff, NickTheCop Very Happy

and a festive season / Merry Christmas to your two travellers!

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 5:13 am

Caligula wrote:

PS: you should try romance baiting Wink

I'm about as romantic as a festering turd neatly nestled in a dilapidated downtown district curb. I don't reckon I'll be too much of a hit with the love lads. Wink

I haven't had the chance to take a call from the boys, nor have P.P and I coordinated our writing, so the poor lads have been sitting in suspense. Thankfully, they don't want to give up yet, what with the prize so close and all. Very Happy

PLS GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY. WE ARE COMMING THERE

Quote:

HELLO DAVID,

LISTING DAVID? THE ONLY WAY FOR YOU TO MAKE IT EASY FOR US

TO SEE YOU NOW IS TO GIVE US THE MISSIONARY NAME, AND THE LOCATION

WHERE COMMING THERE TO MEET YOU AND PASTOR PET3R AS SOON AS

WE RECEIVE 'THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY' IS NEEDED NOW.

PLEASED GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY , WE HAVE BEEN IN THIS

TOWN SINCE THURSDAY LOOKING EVERY WAY TO SEE YOU AND PASTOR

PET3R. WE ARE WAITING FOR THE ADDRESS DO IT FAST, IS YOU THAT DEALING

US NO

W PLEASED SEND IT FAST. THANKS

SESE ZUGULV

The same letter was sent a mere 6 minutes later with only this slightly different subject line:
PLS GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY, WHERE COMMING THERE NOW.

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 12:00 pm

Two new voicemails:

Voicemail 1
Voicemail 2

The first number Google presented as "Unknown", but the second comes back with a Ghana calling code.

Now, normally I wouldn't be happy about my lads bailing on me, but when the voicemails that indicate this are saying "we will be coming immediately", somehow I can't stay mad at them. Very Happy

Let's see if we can make this a quadruple safari. Twisted Evil

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 3:32 pm

Nice going, Nick, and Merry Christmas and Happy New Year and all that. Very Happy

Congratulations on your double digits. clapping

They sounded more frantic on those last two calls. I guess they didn't like sitting still all that time without a word. Laughing

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 4:46 pm

Quote:

WE HAVE BEEN IN THIS TOWN SINCE THURSDAY LOOKING EVERY WAY TO SEE YOU AND PASTOR PET3R.

A no-expense paid safari on christmas day!! What a great holiday present for the mugus, Nick!!

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 4:47 pm

Congratulations to you and PP! Extremely well done!

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 4:54 pm

Excellent work Nick and PP. Have you thought of opening a travel agency?

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 3123

I hate you, Nick. PP - Nice work!

I can´t believe its yet another hat, and with all that genius, we´re still having trouble with Kofi & the like. Wink

I must be the problem here... there´s no stopping you!

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 1:00 am

Wonderful work there, Nick!

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 7:00 am

Craig007 wrote:

I must be the problem here

Aw, there there. No need to talk like that, now.

I've been thinking more about it, and I reckon that our combines arrogance had simply brought us up to an unprecedented level of complacency. A few tweaks in our approach, and we'll certainly make 2010 a waking nightmare for the lads. Very Happy

Nap Olean wrote:

Have you thought of opening a travel agency?

Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of calling up Air Ivoire, Arik, and all of those hotels, and demanding they begin paying us commission... or tribute, if they choose. Wink

It seems that the situation with the bois has been clarified. As you'll recall, a few days ago we had a CDI IP address and both lads' voices on a CDI number. Then, the other day, I got some voicemails from a Ghana IP.

My last conclusion was that the lads had bailed. However, today, it appears, we've received e-mails from a CDI IP and voicemails from a Ghana number, interlaced - so to speak - within the same timeframe. That said, it appears that only Zug had returned to Ghana, while poor Joe is still sitting his ass in Abidjan. Laughing

Quadruple is out of the question now, I suppose, but we can still get a third pith. Twisted Evil

Anyway, here are the letters...

PLEASED DAVID GIVE ME THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY

Quote:

HELLO DAVID,

PLEASED DAVID, GIVE ME THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY AND THE LOCATION WE ARE COMMING THERE TO MEET YOU AND PASTOR PET3R RIGHT NOW STOP WASTING OUR TIME PLAESED, AM WAITING.

SESE ZUGULV

DAVID? STOP WASTING OUR TIME GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY.

Quote:

DAVID, STOP MAKING THIS TO BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR US SEE OURSELF. SIMPLY GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY AND THE LOCATION WE ARE COMMING THERE IN PERSON TO MEET YOU IMMEDIATELY. STOP STANDING FOR ANY CAFE AND STOP DEALEYING US TO MEET YOU AND PASTOR PET3R.

WE CANNOT LOCATE THE CYB3R B1Z CAFE, WE HAVE BEEN THERE FOR YESTERDAY AND CANNOT FOUND ANY CYBER CAFE THERE. PLEASED STOP GIVING US CYBER CAFE ADDRESS, JUST GIVE US THE MISSIONARY NAME AND THE LOCATION ONLY.

WE ARE COMMING DIRECT TO MEET YOU THERE AND PASTOR PET3R PLEASED DO THIS FAST WE ARE WAITING. PRESENTLY WE ARE ARROUND YOU AND CANNOT FOUND EACH OTHER, PLEASED MAKE IT EASY FOR US BY GIVING US THE NAME OF THE (MISSIONARY AND THE LOCATION PLEASED) AS SOON AS WE GET THIS, YOU SEE US IMMEDIATELY, PLEASED WE ARE WAITING.

SESE ZUGULV

PLEASED CALL US IN THIS NUMBER( xxxxxxxx ) IS URGENT.

Quote:

DAVID, STOP MAKING THIS TO BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR US SEE YOU AND PASTOR PET3R. SIMPLY GIVE US THE NAME OF THE MISSIONARY AND THE LOCATION WE ARE COMMING THERE IN PERSON TO MEET YOU IMMEDIATELY. STOP STANDING FOR ANY CAFE AND STOP DEALEYING US TO MEET YOU AND PASTOR PET3R.

WE CANNOT LOCATE THE CYB3R B1Z CAFE, WE HAVE BEEN THERE FOR YESTERDAY AND CANNOT FOUND ANY CYBER CAFE THERE. PLEASED STOP GIVING US CYBER CAFE ADDRESS, JUST GIVE US THE MISSIONARY NAME AND THE LOCATION ONLY.

WE ARE COMMING DIRECT TO MEET YOU THERE AND PASTOR PET3R PLEASED DO THIS FAST WE ARE WAITING. PRESENTLY WE ARE ARROUND YOU AND CANNOT FOUND EACH OTHER, PLEASED MAKE IT EASY FOR US BY GIVING US THE NAME OF THE (MISSIONARY AND THE LOCATION PLEASED) AS SOON AS WE GET THIS, YOU SEE US IMMEDIATELY, OR FIND ANY PAYING LOCAL CALL AROUND YOU IMMEDIATELY AND CALL US IN THIS NUMBER xxxxxxxx IS IVORY COST LOCAL LINE NUMBER AS SOON AS WE SEE YOUR CALL WE WILL COME AND MEET YOU THERE PLEASED WE ARE WAITING.

SESE ZUGULV

WE NEED TO TAKE PASTOR PET3R TO HOSPITAL IS URGENT.

Quote:

HELLO DAVID,

WHAT WE FOUND THEY IS (PHARMACIE SAINT PIERR3 DES R0SEES) THE CYB3R B1Z CAFE IS NO MORE THEY WE CANT FOUND IT THEY AT THAT BOULEVARD ASS0UAN. PLEASED WHAT WE NEED NOW IS THE( MISSIONARY NAME ) WE ARE COMMING TO MEET YOU THERE AS SOON AS WE GET IT AND CALL THIS NUMBER( xxxxxxxx )IS WITH US HERE IN COTE D'IVORY TELL US WHERE YOU ARE WE WILL COME IMMEDIATELY AND MEET YOU, SO WE CAN TAKE PASTOR PET3R TO THE HOSPITAL AGAIN. PLEASED DO THIS FAST IS URGENT. THANKS

SESE ZUGULV

Huh, I guess I never considered the possibility that the could have closed. Oops. Well, at least it doesn't seem to have shaken the lads' spirits. Smile

Here are the voicemails....

Voicemail 1
Voicemail 2
Voicemail 3
Voicemail 4
Voicemail 5

Does he sound frantic at all? Laughing

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 7:20 am

This just in.

Voicemail

I'm glad to see my lads are waking up nice and early. Twisted Evil

419Eater is my life Joined: 20 Jan 2009 Posts: 445

Haha congrats Thumbs up

This is great.

p.s : your avatar is just freaky Smile

Also, just wanted to ask, if you get 2 of them to travel together, its counted as 2 safari's? (considering you're dealing with & speaking to both) I never thought of it that way.

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 7:01 pm

Alive:

Sig Icons Explained wrote:

Hats are for safaris. I believe the general rules for safaris is 200 miles distance travelled (which is 321.86800 kilometres) OR an International border crossing. Getting a lad to travel this distance is the goal. In order to legitimately claim a pith helmet the journey would also have to be IP verified, OR verified by the lad's change of country code of his mobile phone number

I've always assumed that a safari is a testament to a lad's pain on the road. Since there are two lads traveling, that's two lads suffering, two lads running low on money, and two lads having a lot more trouble running their other scams. That's why I've always seen these kinds of things as two safaris.

Honestly, this is the first time I've personally safaried more than one lad at the same time, so I'm not too familiar with the customs.

AL1VE wrote:

p.s : your avatar is just freaky

Oh, if only you knew... Laughing

Posted: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:29 am

YOU GO NICK! clapping

Posted: Fri Jan 01, 2010 3:59 am

Well, now I'm confused. I told the laddies to meet me at a cathedral in Abidjan (in a far greater number of words), saying that I'll only come out if I hear Zug's voice and see him on the phone. Since he was the one that went back to Ghana, I figured this was a great way to get him back and claim a third pith.

Well, it seems he did what I said, but it doesn't make much sense. The following voicemails came from a Ghana calling code (same number)...

Voicemail 1
Voicemail 2

As you'll hear, the first voicemail is Zug saying that his representatives will be at the cathedral shortly. The second one (from the same number) is him saying that "we" are at the cathedral. Thing is, I can totally hear cathedral-y echoes and sounds of people in the background, and yet the number is still a Ghana code.

Has he got his number on roaming? Did he go back to Ghana and come to Abidjan again? Was he waiting in Abidjan with his boi all along? Or was he just trying to pull a fast one on me? Confused

Well, I'm still kinda happy. I know there's at least one boi still in Abidjan (on account of the IP addresses), I know that both traveled there at least once, and - best of all - I'd say it's very likely that at least one poor idiot was standing around at the cathedral today, looking like a lost tourist. After all, I did say I'd drag the $140 000 along with me to the meet. Wink

Posted: Fri Jan 01, 2010 10:23 am

Nick, brilliant as ever. Maybe your custom tag should become Travel argent of Lucifer Wink

Great to see you hitting so many balls out of the stadium Smile

Al1ve - that's not Nick's avatar, it's his webcam Wink

Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2010 8:13 pm

Christ almighty! One safari a month? I'm obviously not crazy enough to be here.

Might as well call it a day Crying or Very sad

Posted: Sun Jan 10, 2010 10:54 pm

^^ Chin up, little fella. Keep on working at it and you'll achieve your goals eventually. Very Happy

manbiteslion wrote:

Al1ve - that's not Nick's avatar, it's his webcam Wink

If only you knew just how close to the truth that was. Laughing

I'll update the situation with the bois as soon as I get word of the proceedings.

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