Goings on in Oz (now with 100% more Zombie Armageddon!)

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 2:12 pm

Nurse Nasty wrote:

Look I'm going with shuffle and slow, but greater numbers.

I would have to say that I agree. After all, rigor-mortis would have an impact and I don't believe it possible that any Zombie could break the Olympic sprint record as depicted in fictional movies.

Yes people. Fictional movies.

But what we're discussing here is fact. And as NN says - it could save your life.

Next question. I think I read somewhere that Zombies don't like water and try to avoid swimming. Should I therefore head to the beach when the Armageddon arrives?
Or is that vampires?
Personally, if Zombies are scared of water? I'm all for global warming and rising sea levels.

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

Zombies scoff (that is if they had the cortex left to scoff) at water. They just walk right in, sink to the bottom (no pesky air in lungs or tissue to keep them afloat), and continue walking.

It's ice they can't handle. I suggest camping out in the middle of a hockey rink and then having fun body checking the zombies into the boards.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 2:53 pm

Think of all the people who keep tropical fish tanks. They will no longer need to purchase heaters for the water. That alone is a huge saving in itself. The six min soft boiled egg will now be the four min soft boiled egg. Really, the savings will be tremendous.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 3:01 pm

@Razor.
So maybe the whole global warming is just a dasterdly scheme by the zombies to get rid of their natural enemy; ice and the cold.
I think we are on to something.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 3:29 pm

I am fully in agreement with the zombies then. It could also be that they (the zombies) are regular contributors to wikipedia.

@ thud - so you are trying to blow me up by getting me to change water to vapor to show me how it expands...if using that theory ice should shrink! You example operates off molecular activity not density.

@ r2 - so you're saying palentologists use radioactive oxygen isotopes to date evidence of carbon emmisions where other means are not available? Carbon 14 was mentioned as I was not aware there was another method. I shall have to delve further. I would think this too has its flaws as does most radiological dating methods.

The farmer up a gum tree should be careful for snakes and funnel spiders, yes? I have heard zombies can climb,too....

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 3:30 pm

Slightlyoutofit wrote:

If we're being chased by a hoarde of zombies during the Armageddon, I'm even prepared to trip up one of my fellow mods so I gain that extra 10 yards.

at the risk of being accused of being off-topic... Mr. Green

which fellow mod are you referring to?

Rover wrote:

Think of all the people who keep tropical fish tanks. They will no longer need to purchase heaters for the water. That alone is a huge saving in itself.

you won't need a tank either - just keep the doors and windows shut, to stop them escaping. Wink

@badgerbait - no, that's not quite how it works - i'll pm you with the answer

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 3:46 pm

I think Slightly would trip any of us up if it helped him, we don't call him Sly for nothing. When chased by a hungry zombie, however you only have to run fast enough to keep ahead of the slowest moderator.

We live on the first hill from the sea, which is 40 miles away. I'm applying for planning permission to build a pier at the bottom of the hill, with an amusement arcade, then maybe a marina. My business model depends on global warming getting on with it though, Ive promised the bank manager and everything. Smile

Meanwhile, they could just pass an anti zombie law, making it illegal, then our prisons would all look like this: LINK

Heck, this thread has everything, even Michael Bloody Jackson now.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 4:12 pm

See, that's the difference between Slightly and the rest of the mods. Any of us would gladly throw ourselves to the zombies if it would give him an extra 10 yards. We're noble like that, but he'll see it as a sign of weakness.

Of course he won't see us as weak when the zombie bites turn us into zombies too and we're all snacking on his brains.

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

@badgerbait. No; from 4C to 80C water expands by about 3%. Detecting that on the kitchen table would be challenging, but not impossible.

@Craig, I disagree. Both sides are spouting bad evidence or evidence that can be argued. For example the hockey stick temperature curve. Interesting and useful, but so heavily massaged that it is largely fantasy.

However the evidence from the other side can be refuted even more easily.

There are 1366 W/m2 of incident solar irradiation at the top of the atmosphere, and 344W/m2 at ground level. It requires a change of 1W/m2 to account for global warming. That link you provide scoffs that man-made CO2 could only account for a change of one part in a thousand .... or about 1W/m2. I'll buy that for a dollar.

Your link then proceeds with some speculation about solar cycles. We happen to be bumping along the bottom of an 11-year cycle right now, and the hockey-stick brigade are wondering where their warming went to. It'll probably pick up in the next year or two. Although the "sceptics" talk about solar cycles, they don't actually show that we are in such a cycle now. Are we? Where's the evidence?

They then go back to the hockey stick graph for a bit. I have to agree with them here, but it really makes no difference to whether climate change is happening or not. It's just a red herring.

Then come glaciers. I did some checking here. There is a database of glacier data, which I sampled in a thoroughly unscientific manner. It shows one thousand three hundred and four glaciers are indeed growing. Unfortunately, twenty two thousand five hundred and ten are shrinking. Another (anti-AGW) source says they have been shrinking since 1820 - before CO2 kicked in.

On the other side of the equation, there is no proof that CO2 is causing uncontrolled warming. There is proof that there is warming and evidence that CO2 will cause warming of about the right degree.

My own personal feeling is:

1. We are carrying out a really, really dangerous experiment that we don't understand. We ought to stop doing it before all the escalating feedback mechanisms kick in. (To be really paranoid, it's only 400ppm now but are we sure that CO2 levels will peak at 1,500ppm? At 5,000ppm (maybe less) CO2 is toxic.)

2. We have to give up fossil fuels some time. In another century it will be even more painful.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 3123

Thud - I would happily provide yet more evidence, but I know it will be ultimately refuted. I can only make a fully reasoned judgement if I sample & collect the data myself. From the evidence that is published, I have made a choice to go with a consensus - I realise it's the minority, but as I've said before, having delved into facts for so long, only for contention to be found with them, I take a common sense approach.

I understand it's not the proper way of doing things, but I've satisifed myself, on countless bits of evidence I've seen, and through my own research, that I will take the position I have.

Quote:

It shows one thousand three hundred and four glaciers are indeed growing.

I'm getting picky here, but to stand my ground, I need to check: the rates of glacier growth may be exponential, so much so that it counteracts a 0.001% shrinkage in the 25,000 other ones. Really, comparison rate is required before using that as evidence. What I'm saying is, perhaps on balance, if those 1,304 glaciers are growing at a rate of 5% a year, and those 22,510 that are decreasing, it may be at such a rate that the growth outweighs the decline.

I know that's probably not accurate, but you see my point about evidence interpretation?

Quote:

2. We have to give up fossil fuels some time. In another century it will be even more painful.

Absolutely. You're not going to hear a peep of disagreement from me on this one. I see there is a massively growing need for a viable alternative energy to be found, and at least for cars, I'd happily bet my salary on hydrogen being the best way. Electricty - no. Just no.

My only issue with this is that we are being asked to forgo our liberties we have at the moment, to use less oil/cause less damage - it's going to happen anyway, it's delaying the inevitable. If you're going to get a slap in the face, wouldn't you have it sooner, to get it over with?

I'm also not going to disagree with teaching children about the need for them to find new energies, make them realise what they need to do, not what they need to stop doing - I do disagree with teaching children that the human race is vile for "killing" the planet.

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

I said I was being unscientific, but to my mind you'd need quite a skew to beat a 17:1 ratio.

Interesting thought experiment that just came to me.

1. If you were to lay a bet, what odds would you give that global warming existed?

2. What odds would you be willing to accept to ensure that your children or grandchildren were not subjected to riots, famines, possible wars and zombie outbreaks?

No need to answer.

Edit for typos and clarity

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 4:39 pm

thud419 wrote:

2. What risk would you be willing to run to ensure that your children or grandchildren were not subjected to riots, famines, possible wars and zombie outbreaks?

I'd like to butt in here and just state that the Zombie Armageddon is a certainty. Doesn't matter wether you eat your carrots or not. It's gonna happen. Probably in our life-time too.

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

This seems apropos to the entire debate... even the zombies.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/justarikia/open-mindedness-7uo

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:01 pm

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:30 pm

^^^
Sweet! I hope Al Gore sees how his internet is being used for delightful discourse!

@ Thud - no, I understand what you and Craig are getting at and concur with both of you regarding more than just the evil humans causing the alleged warming (I still haven't seen the effects even though I have increased my use of CFCs). I also agree with the search for a viable alternate power source (why is no one re-visting Tesla's ideas! Combined with safe French Nuke power it would be fabulous!) but that is a long time coming with regards to matching fossil fueled contraptions in terms of output. Air travel would end if a massive shift was made, though I heard AG's Gulfstream 4 uses hybrid engines?).

As for the dreaded zombie uprising, I think the big factor is what kind of zombie we are talking about. Are we talking Night of living Dead type or the Evil Dead type? If the latter we had best start building fortresses immediately. The former type are capable of taming! As long as a steady supply of meat or meat byproducts are supplied they can be docile.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:34 pm

If you need practice or to see what to expect of the Zombie Armageddon...
eatbrains.com
Off topic-Would someone please explain to me how to make a link that you can click open?

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:45 pm

How to make a clicky link

Code:

[url=http://allthecobblersinyourbrowserbar]LINK[/url]

You dont need to use the code button, I did that so it wanst made into live link, then you wouldn't see how I did it.

Something else that gets my goat is volcanoes - a good belch from one undoes all the good done by a thousand years of recycling (and cycling).

If we can't get Greenpeace to bung them up with rubber dinghys, maybe zombies could be trained to walk into them in their thousands, solving 2 problems at once.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 2628

Even better if you could train the zombies to walk into the volcano holding a bag of rubbish in each hand, save on landfill usage.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:55 pm

^ But then you'd have another huge emission of CO2, making the problem only worse!

Dear God. We have to stop global warming immediately before we descend into a never ending downward spiral of suicidal zombie garbage disposal men, making matters even worse.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 6:59 pm

Badgerbait wrote:

^^^
As for the dreaded zombie uprising, I think the big factor is what kind of zombie we are talking about. Are we talking Night of living Dead type or the Evil Dead type? If the latter we had best start building fortresses immediately. The former type are capable of taming! As long as a steady supply of meat or meat byproducts are supplied they can be docile.

There are only two types of Zombie Armageddon:

The Hetero Zombie Armageddon and the Unhetero Zombie Armageddon.

The Hetero Zombie Armageddon will be totally sweet. This will be the one where hot chicks in bikinis wield machine guns and automatic shotguns and take out slow walking type zombies whilst I sit in a deck-chair on a supermarket roof, watching and drinking chilled margueritas.

Then there's the Unhetero Zombie Armageddon. Basically, this one's a bastard. This is where the zombies are pretty fast, pretty switched on and pretty hard to escape from. In this scenario, I'll probably be hiding in a dark, dusty cellar somewhere, drinking my own urine.

I know which one I'm hoping for.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 7:57 pm

Badgerbait wrote:

^^^
Sweet! I hope Al Gore sees how his internet is being used for delightful discourse!

@ Thud - no, I understand what you and Craig are getting at and concur with both of you regarding more than just the evil humans causing the alleged warming (I still haven't seen the effects even though I have increased my use of CFCs).

[1] Al Gore never actually claimed to have invented the internet; http://www.snopes.com/quotes/internet.asp

[2] CFCs are related to ozone depletion, not climate change.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 8:57 pm

nn - i was just about to put the ink cartridge in the printer, honest!

Craig007 wrote:

glaciers [...] I need to check

indeed you do.

it's true that, in some areas, local conditions have resulted in more winter snowfall and cooler summers (ie, less melting).
however, these are exceptions to the general rule that most glaciers are melting.

even many of the advancing glaciers are actually melting.
that sounds contradictory, but the reason is simple - increased meltwater flowing under such a glacier reduces friction and allows it to glide more rapidly down the valley.
the glacier face can then move forwards faster than the rate of melting.
to confirm such cases, flow rates can be measured, as can the decreasing volume of ice locked up in such a glacier.

Roycropper wrote:

Something else that gets my goat is volcanoes - a good belch from one undoes all the good done by a thousand years of recycling (and cycling).

i know you were being humorous, but i've heard this urban myth before, and some people might be credulous enough to actually believe it.
in reality, humans add [annually] about 150 times more atmospheric co2 than all the planet's volcanoes put together.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 9:49 pm

150 times...!

EVERYONE STOP BREATHING!!!!!

I know you really mean fossil fuel consumption, right?

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:02 pm

What is a fossil fuel, is that like the watch? Confused

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:12 pm

You got it Jose! It takes many thousands of fossil watches to fuel anti-zombie mechanized artillery. Wow! Good Job!

@ Slightly - drinking your own urine!? Blood has nutritional value and it's like recycling at the same time!

@ Yastreb - ozone depletion was the original greenhouse effect cause, from like the 80's dood.

Addtionally, he (AG) may not have directly said it...but I can see him taking credit. He did after all get the Nobel for Peace without having promoted a peaceful act (ending a conflict etc. , what used to be the criteria anyway, but we won't go where the Nobel folks go). WE are trying to stay focused and apolitical.

How is the farmer today, was he taken into protective custody, drugged up and put on IV fluids yet?

Goings on in Oz (now with 100% more Zombie Armageddon!)	View next topic View previous topic