Tales from a DH NSFW/Safari/Lesbian/back again!

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Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 4:04 am

Francesca hasn't given up quite yet He writes:

How are you today,I hope that you are fine.I had went to the Kairaba Hotel and was told that the bus left last night and i asked them about the 5imba s@fari c@mp but they said that they dont know the place and i had went round the Gambia searching for the place but could not be able to locate it.Please i think it will be better if you can come out from the place with your aunt,book a taxi then meet me at the following address,Westfield Clinic beside Co-operative B/stop by Mamadimanging High Way and you can also reach me with this telephone number 7141803.Please i will be happy if you can reach me with that number or the above address so that it will make everything easy for us than me going round the cities of Gambia.Thanks and please take good care of yourself .
Frank

IP Address: 212.60.73.65 Gambia. I'm guessing he's writing from his laptop still

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 4:15 am

Sabrina writes back. She's found some "distractions" and has no intention of picking Frank up: Oh and need I even SAY language warning anymore???

Frank,

You need to get your sorry arse into gear and call Bernie Rh0des at the 5imba s@fari c@mp! We're like 100 miles away or something! I'm NOT getting into a cab for fuck's sake when Bernie can just resend the Shuttle bus. I've found some seriously hot African Man Meat here and if you think I'm gonna stop shagging his muscly little arse just to travel for roughly an hour BY CAB NO LESS to pick up YOUR scrawny arse, then think AGAIN!

Quite simply put Frank, just because you seriously FUCKED UP (AGAIN I might add), you ARE still a paying customer at the 5imba s@fari c@mp and therefore entitled to be treated like one. Write an email to Bernie at the 5imba s@fari c@mp and get him to pick you up. Surely accidents like this happen all the time

Don't piss him off though, he looks like a burly fucker to me. And get your street directions right. That fucking highway you prattle on about does NOT come up in Google maps. I'm not paying some dickless wonder to drive around looking for a non existent highway when YOU can just pull your finger out of your arse and write an email to the 5imba s@fari c@mp. Do you still HAVE the email with their address on it? (That highway does NOT appear on Google maps, I REALLY tried to find it!)

Sabrina

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 4:57 am

nice i am glad that this bait is still going on Laughing

u have to mask that SSC the last 2 posts (1 post each)

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 5:11 am

And 'cos I KNOW our mate Francesca is online (and the doc suggested I get him to email the camp). So I send frank this, along with some screengrabs from 80's popstar Sabrina Salerno's video, "Boys":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiuHdUkuRi0

Hopefully that'll get him to write to the Camp and get him to travel even more. I quite like the design and feel of this site, I'd GO myself if the camp wasn't FICTIONAL

----- Forwarded Message ----
Sent: Friday, 11 September, 2009 2:52:22 PM
Subject: Come on Frank, JOIN THE PARTY!

Francesca,

I gotta admit this place FUCKING ROCKS! I've screwed TWO of the staff in the first day, a third is eyeing me off (but he's white AND fuckugly and so has NO chance!!!), and the female concierge is gonna get hit on REAL SOON! she may be Asian, but fuck she has tits to DIE for. If I can, I'll get a pic for you. I've attached a pic of me here in the camp

Have you written to Bernie yet? I explained your position in detail and reminded him that I PAID a lot of moola for your Floating Lodge, and he's willing to go get you! So there's NO need for a CAB! Here's the link to the 5imba s@fari c@mp, with an email addy on the bottom:

http://the c@mp weblink/

SURELY there's an email addy on that!!! Come on frank, you're MISSING OUT!!! And besides, you PROMISED to take us Boutique shopping! A gal can KILL if she doesn't get to shop, you DO know that don't you????

Come on Frank, let's paint that town red like we promised!

Sabrina

Let's see what he does next

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:20 pm

In the first (of two) emails, Francesca blames Sabrina yet again...

I got your mail and will like to tell you that you both had succeded in making fool of me because if truly you are in Gambia i dont see any reason why you shouldnt call a cab then come to the address i dropped to you and call me with the phone number i dropped for you and you will see me immedately because i am very close to that place.Please for your information dont expect me to go anywhere again because i have already ran out of cash and had told my brother in Senegal to send money through Western Money Union transfer to me here in Gambia so that i will use it to come back to Senegal.I want to let you know that you are fake so you can go on with your fake or whatever party you are having because i have found out that there is nothing like Simba Safari Camp here in Gambia and even the fake telephone number that is in the paper is United Kingdoms number and not Gambia.If you prove yourself to be real then you have to take a cab to the address i dropped then call the number i also dropped and you will see me immedately.Please if you cant do it like that then you are fake and its only God that can judge you both because i didnt do anything wrong to you both to deserve that kind of treatment and thereby stop mailing me.Please no need of disturbing yourself again because if you cant come to the address i dropped for you then call me on the line i also drooped so that i will meet you there immedately then forget it and carry on with your so call party.Thanks

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:35 pm

Frank's recognised the 5imba S@fari C@mp number as a redirect. Fortunately, Sabrina doesn't care:

On Fri, Sep 11, 2009 at 8:49 PM, Frank Micheal <fucktard> wrote:

Sabrina just show a cab the address i dropped for you then the cab will take you there immedately.You dont have to continue punishing me that way.I am disabled now to go anywhere in this Gambia because i had ran out of cash.If you really want to see me there then i dont see the reason why you cant take a cab to the address i dropped for you since you knew that i am in Gambia or you can at least call me on the number i also dropped.Thanks

Sabrina writes back. In RL, I TRIED the evaphone thingy, but it doesn't like his number:

Look, let's be Frank,

Kathrin has calmed down considerably in the last 24 hours, and is starting to enjoy herself finally. And as I said earlier, did YOU email the 5imba s@fari c@mp? I don't give a rat's arse about the phone number, ring it if you want but EMAIL them. As I said, I've PAID for you to be here, and they're willing to send the shuttle bus down to you. While we're still in Gambia, we are NOT in Banjul and I'm guessing about an hour out of town.

Write to Bernie you fucktard, what have you got to lose???

Sabrina

And the beat goes on...

Posted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 2:19 pm

He sends the same thing to the Aunt as well. Let's hope he's SERIOUS about running out of cash, then he can't be online scamming people Smile

Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 4:19 pm

Nice Job !!!!!!! Razz

I love when they leave just before it's time to collect on the good thing Smile

Of course the phone is a re-direct, they don't want UK customers having to pay long distance charges to book a room...it is a luxury worry free camp after all...it is answered by staff meant for booking rooms and don't have much to do with the running of the camp which is why he needs to e-mail Bernie...

at this point, telling him to meet a bus or a cab doesn't matter since he'd be waiting for either one...you can get pissy and send the friend in a cab to meet him while you let the lovelorn stay at the hotel to get ready to meet him - of course that would be tomorrow before you could make it...

you could have the bus agree to act as a cab and bring you to his location - but there are no directions, you got lost and tried for hours to find his location, you finally found where you thought he was supposed to be but he wasn't there (wrong side of the clinic maybe) and it looked like a "bad' neighborhood to him so you got concerned when a group of guys started to watch you & you left...

of course, either way it would be tomorrow before you could possibly travel...

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:31 am

^^^ @ Ivana:

That is AWESOME! I think I might use some of that! Let's see if he wrote to either charatcer first Smile

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:35 am

Lazy so and so didn't write a thing! I'll write to him and see if I can jolt him out of his complacency.

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:53 am

I send him this. Letting him know he's running out of time:

Francesca,

I need to know, did you to write or ring to Bernie??? I asked Bernie about the UK number and he said Of course the phone is a re-direct, they don't want UK customers having to pay long distance charges to book a room... It is a luxury worry free camp after all... It is answered by staff meant for booking rooms and don't have much to do with the running of the camp which is why YOU need to e-mail Bernie...

If you're not gonna turn up, then I need to get a refund for your ticket. We LEAVE for Sydney on the 20th, to be back in Sydney by the 23rd, so you have a WEEK to get your arse over here.

Also check that number you gave us. I tried it and it didn't connect to ANYTHING, not even an engaged signal.

Sabrina

As I type he's online and in invisible mode. Let's see if he comes through

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:41 am

nice the number didn't connect to anything...

you can try again and again with the same results -- too bad you can't get someone to call for you briefly...my virgin mobile phone only dials us numbers...

set up a date and time to meet him with the cab or the bus - and you'll be on either of them..I do think a bus has more of a chance to get lost...

of course it got a flat, and that took time to change...and you got lost and that took awhile...then corrupt police hassled you for about an hour before they realized you weren't carrying money and let you go ...so you were several hours being late, but you were there you think, and didn't see anyone who looked like his picture...

maybe agree to try again the next day with more specific directions - left at this road, 10 miles down that road and then a right on this road type thing...keep him there overnight again...this time have him hold a sign with your names so you can find him easier Twisted Evil

may not get a trophy pic out of it, but the satisfaction of knowing he stood around for hours looking like a fool Smile

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:04 am

Ivana wrote:

but the satisfaction of knowing he stood around for hours looking like a fool Smile

I already have that satisfaction! Frannypoo waited at the airport for 14 hours looking like the idiot he is. Also Clint Eastwood's 1990 flick "The rookie" was the late night movie last night here in Melbourne and it had this quote: "That son of a bitch is hurting out there, and I'm fucking liking it"! Gold!

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:42 am

In an earlier email he asks to be picked up from here:

Westfield Clinic beside Co-operative B/stop by Mamadimanging High Way

I couldn't even FIND that highway on google maps. How much chance will the shuttle bus have??? And googling that line ONLY points to this thread Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:44 am

As does Mamadimanging High Way Evil or Very Mad

I guarantee the bus will get lost

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 6:03 am

I do a bit of research and find out there IS a Westfield clinic in a place called Serrekunda. I hand out an olive branch:

Frannypoo,

I can't see that Highway on ANY maps that are here at the 5imba s@fari C@mp. There IS a westfield clinic in a place called Serrekunda though. Is THAT the place you're talking about? Lemme know so we can start organising the shuttle bus to be sent to you. If not email Bernie via email:5imba_s@fari@[email protected]

I really don't want to have to return the stuff Kathrin bought for you. And besides, you promised to take us BOUTIQUE SHOPPING! You're not going against your word are you, not letting a gal go shopping is punishable by death Smile

I wouldn't want to get the in the way of Gal Shopping...

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:40 am

^^

Quote:

I do a bit of research

Baiters work MUCH harder than lads so they should never grumble!

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:24 pm

Nice work! Your poor lad is both missing you and reading a series of vile invective laden email designed to wither his manhood to a tumor.

No word as yet from your lad, so encourage him to write Bernie so that Bernie can offer an upgrade to the Hemingway Suite. Its the least we can do considering all the misfortune your poor lad has suffered.

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:27 pm

So, we find out that he is indeed in Serrekunda.. IP Address Gambia:

How are you today.I hope that you are fine.The Westfield Clinic in Serrekunda you talked of is where i am so if you can get there then ring me with this phone number 7141803 and you will see me there immedately because i am just one pole there,i mean that i am very close to that Clinic.You just call the phone number as i write it then you will get me.Sabrina come to the Westfield Clinic at Serrekunda and just give me a call with the number i dropped and you will see me within 30 seconds.Thanks and please extend my greetings to your aunt.
Frank

But then he writes this, SLACK FUCK that he is. Slappage time:

Please Sabrina,i cant be able to write to those people instead i think it will be better if i will be reached with the address Westfield Clinic at Serrekunda then give me a call with this 7141803 when you get there and you will see me in the next 30 seconds.Sabrina i think if you really want me to be there as you said then you will just do it for me and come there for me.Sabrina i will do anything you want me to do for you when i got there.Thanks and please take good care of yourself.

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:38 pm

For a change he's actually offline, guess a guy's gotta sleep sometime. Sabrina's not happy, so a slappage is in order. As usual, language warning:

You CAN'T write to these people??? WHAT THE FUCK??? Are you RETARDED or something? I travel half way around the world and you can't even write a fucking EMAIL??? Your phone number does sweet fuck all so I'm not gonna try it a sixth time.

And how many times do I have to tell you? I don't CARE if you don't turn up, I just want to know if I should refund your ticket! To be Frank with you Kathrin is the one that wants you here. EMAIL those people, to get the Shuttlebus sent to you. I'm not ringing a phone number that CLEARLY doesn't work. As a paying Customer you have the right to email and demand the Shuttle bus be sent to you. You're not the only one who missed it as it turns out and the couple who missed it were picked up yesterday. Had you pulled your finger out of your fat fucking arse you could've been ON that bus, and not wasting our time trying to get this sorted.

Are you a Man or a mouse Frank? I'm leaning towards the latter. How can expect to be the man of the house if you can't even do this right??? You expect to marry Kathrin? Well how will you be able to do that if you can't even sort out something as simple as emailing to get a FREE shuttlebus sent to you???

You now have SIX days before we leave to go home. I can get a refund if you're not here in five days.

Sabrina

let's see if THAT will jolt out of his complacency

Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2009 10:48 pm

I think francesca's given up. Not a peep in over 24 hours. It took him 28 hours to get there, I think he's gone home. Crying or Very sad

Oh well, at least he was offline for a few days. I'll wind him up a bit before leaving him alone. Meanwhile, on the Rumemmeister front...

Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2009 11:40 pm

i just hope i really didn't have any money so he can not spending it in a internetcafe, so he's looking for a nice job to make some honest money and go back to the internetcafe to spend it again

yeah i know wishfull thinking Rolling Eyes

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:15 am

I'm still thinking my niece character's gonna cop a serve for not sending the taxi like he asked. I'll just remind him HE missed the bus (I won't mention it was never there) Embarassed

He's such a misogynist prick he may even still be baitable. One can only hope.

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:24 am

^^ Of course the bus was there, you met a very nice man who travelled on it, he is taking you to luncheon and siesta.

Sabrina has sh4gg3d everything that moves and is now trying threesomes.

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:39 am

I wish MY sex life was like hers... In RL it's non-existant! Embarassed

but it does make venting at frank all the more enjoyable Twisted Evil

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