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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 9:00 am |
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I was duty manager at the station yesterday for my sins. When an I was called to meet one of our services just in from London, Two canadian passengers boarded in London wanting to go to Maidenhead (The train doesnt even stop in Maidenhead or anywhere near) because they thought the places were next to each other, If you think 180 miles is close then you would be right,
The Canadian said "Well I asked someone and he said I was at the wrong station and I saw that train and boarded it" to which I replied "Well it was the wrong train and to get to maidenhead is £62 standard or as you want its £209.50 first class each, You have 6 minutes to decide pay and get to the train on platform 5" (I wasnt in the mood for shit then as it was near home time and such a mistake doesn't warrent free tickets). He moans about sueing Britrail (American ticket agent he bought the tickets through) to which I replied "Thats your choice sir but you have 3 minutes to let me know your choice" He opts for the first class tickets and off he goes.
So I am walking to the car after finishing and he gets ahold of me telling me he missed the train as he moaned and moaned. I had to laugh! Nearly in his face but I kept it straight and decided to get him some help but he wanted compensation! Gahh! |
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nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
Free Pastor Frank |
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N N N
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Posts: 689
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 1:18 pm |
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Come on Jay, you know the customer is ALWAYS right!
Sometimes counting way beyond 10 just doesn't do it.
I think my favourite complaint has to be an irate American couple who had just completed the "rain forest" walking tour and were bitterly complaining to the purser's staff and anyone that would listen that they had got soaking wet as it had done nothing but rain for 2 hours non-stop during said tour .....
OR
(I'm a big guy) The extremely petite (4 foot nothing and 60lb max dripping wet) American (again, but not the same one) lady who was complaining about the size of the shower cubicle in her luxury promenade deck cabin not being big enough. They were all the same size, didn't matter what your berth was. I simply looked her in the eye (downwards quite a way) and said "You thnk you have problems lady?". It took her a while to realise this was British humour in full swing. |
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Alan B'Stard
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 15 Jul 2009
Posts: 76
Location: At the bottom of my garden (honest!)
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 1:51 pm |
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I'm an avionic engineer, and a few years ago, whilst working for Thomas Cook Airlines, I was contacted by the police whilst at work. One of our passengers on a Boeing 757 had made a compalint of assault against the company. She claimed that we had allowed jet fuel to leak from the fuel tanks on to her head. This while she was sat in her seat, on the aircraft.
When this woman finally contacted us direct we were able to point out that jet fuel isn't stored in the overhead luggage lockers, it's in the wings, beneath her feet. So, unless she carried her own provate anti-gravity field round with her, there was no way on this earth that the fuel tanks could have leaked upwards. When asked what this jet fuel smelled like, she said 'water'. Unsurprising, really, because that's exactly what it was that had dripped on her - condensation. Or, as we described it to her, clean water. |
_________________ x2
'Go to hell..baboom' W@ll@ J0nes |
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Mr Tambourine Man
Baiting Guru
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 3398
Location: Magic swirlin' ship
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:59 pm |
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There's a Leeds Castle in Kent, England. There's also a city called Leeds 200 miles or so further north. I don't need to explain further, do I? |
_________________ is always Good when you have the zeal to be a hitwoman when you out of school,it makes you bold and reall and it makes you more high than any other of your friend.
NOW AMBACK FOR YOU AGAIN STURBORN SHIT
you dont have a phone.that makes makes you joe butt
Fuck you and go find something to do man. Stop disturbing me please.
This is definitely why you will remain and die in poverty, ignorant of good things and easy acknowledgment of bad things and words. Shame on you, you wicked generation children.
i went you to no that this is not a cheld pray. i went you to get back to me
we are not scammer,we hate scammer as you do.scammer make out life harder and harder,a lot of people think we are scammer,in fact,we are not!! please trustt us |
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:41 pm |
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If your ticket said MAIDENHEAD Would you board a train for MANCHESTER which had the following calling points?
LONDON EUSTON
MILTON KEYNES CENTRAL
STOKE ON TRENT
STOCKPORT
MANCHESTER PICCADILLY
(Enough said )
The customer is right 2 out of 10 times, Most customers aren't cocky so earn a free ticket.
If I told you, "You are the wrong station You need Paddington not euston" Would you really board a train bound for Manchester? |
_________________
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nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
Free Pastor Frank |
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Titania
Hell on wheels
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 2442
Location: Rollin' rollin' rollin'
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:43 pm |
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I have a friend who was a travel agent. One of his favorite stories is of the couple who booked a Hawaiian vacation through his agency. First, they asked if they needed passports (this was in southern California). Then, when they returned, they came into his office extremely angry. When he asked them why they were so mad, the wife said, "You didn't tell us we'd have to fly over WATER!" |
_________________ i do not know you.you need to expanciate more - C0llins W3aver
those words really made me felt completely bad..and i had to dust my ass and wipe tears Micheal David
x 8
Stanley's Christmas Adventure 2008 - Lagos to Abuja - massbait |
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GomiFan
Hello I'm New here!
Joined: 18 Aug 2009
Posts: 2
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 6:40 pm |
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Haha, hilarious!
That's like boarding a flight to Tokyo when your going to Toronto (except not as extreme, obviously). |
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Mr Tambourine Man
Baiting Guru
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 3398
Location: Magic swirlin' ship
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 6:55 pm |
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There's this recent story about a Swedish couple on their way to the Isle of Capri.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/8173308.stm
They walk among us. |
_________________ is always Good when you have the zeal to be a hitwoman when you out of school,it makes you bold and reall and it makes you more high than any other of your friend.
NOW AMBACK FOR YOU AGAIN STURBORN SHIT
you dont have a phone.that makes makes you joe butt
Fuck you and go find something to do man. Stop disturbing me please.
This is definitely why you will remain and die in poverty, ignorant of good things and easy acknowledgment of bad things and words. Shame on you, you wicked generation children.
i went you to no that this is not a cheld pray. i went you to get back to me
we are not scammer,we hate scammer as you do.scammer make out life harder and harder,a lot of people think we are scammer,in fact,we are not!! please trustt us |
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Catcher In The Lie
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 22 Sep 2008
Posts: 877
Location: 404 Yellow Brick Road
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 9:45 pm |
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Okay, I just had to This is my all time favorite 'blonde' joke:
A plane is on its way to Houston when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.
The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for Economy and that she will have to sit in the back. The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm staying right here!"
The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the co-pilot that there is a blonde bimbo sitting in First Class who belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat. The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm staying right here!"
The co-pilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman who won't listen to reason.
The pilot says "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde."
He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says "Oh, I'm Sorry, " and she gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy section.
The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.
"I told her First Class isn't going to Houston."
(and I'm blonde ) |
_________________ x 11 x 20
"I don't want you to be burdered again." Ali the hitlad Sule
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Connie L. Gus
Moderator
Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 7243
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
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Posted:
Wed Aug 19, 2009 10:43 pm |
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^^^ I love that joke. Last summer while posting on 419eater, I got a call from a family friend. She's a travel agent and she asked me to pick her up at a train station in 20 minutes. Um... OK, what's up? It took a few minutes but I found out she had gotten on the wrong train. I told her to get off the train immediately so that I would only have to drive 3 miles instead of 14. It worked out well, we had dinner and I drove her home.
Last week I was standing at the airport check in with my military girl's bags on the scales waiting for a clerk. The guy next to us with a Northern European accent refused to pay $350 extra for his tickets and overweight baggage. I was concerned as my little one got charged last time for baggage even though the airline's website said that they do not charge military with ID and travel orders. I was not with her then. All production on the lines ceased as the supervisor was called and all the clerks circled around to listen. Apparently he had talked to them all. I calmly reached into my back pocket to unfold and flatten the airline website screen shots that I had printed out looking forward to a fight. As I was circling the key phrases, I heard "That's absurd." "How asinine, idiots and no way." Then I heard the white haired supervisor say "But sir, your tickets were for yesterday." The customer said "That's why we've been here since this morning. We should be compensated for our time." Even though he had refused to go "Over there", as he had just been from "Over there", he went back "Over there". My little one's bags were checked in with a smile and a thank you. |
_________________ x8
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
-a few,
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
I am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
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ParaNoid
** REMEMBERED **
Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 5123
Location: Looking for Steward.
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:29 am |
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Name confusion reigns on all continents. In the state of Colorado, there is a town name Berthoud and there is a city named Loveland. They are both North of Denver about 50 miles.
No big deal, right?
The difficulty comes that there are other destinations that share the name. There is Berthoud Pass, an area that has back country skiing. There is also a Loveland Pass AND a separate Loveland ski area. All of these areas are a little more than 50 miles WEST of Denver.
One might think that people traveling would know their destination. Not so… the bus station in the City of Loveland had a sign in the window that said, “This is NOT the Loveland ski area.”
I did see at least one bewildered person get off of the bus with skis and poles. Oooops…
There is an altitude difference of almost 3,000 feet. Could have been a GREAT safari modality. |
_________________ Gold Coins here
x 4 <b>Looking for a Mentor? Click here</b>
"If I get mad at you, please just understand me. I am just being ParaNoid because I love you so much." - unknown
Visit www.scamwarners.com |
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 9:07 am |
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But the passengers were told they needed to go to Paddington and board a GREEN train there, He was at Euston and Boarded a big grey, red and yellow train, He rang our office demanding we either refund him or get britrail to refund him, They don't refund for stupidity. |
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nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
Free Pastor Frank |
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Alan B'Stard
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 15 Jul 2009
Posts: 76
Location: At the bottom of my garden (honest!)
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 1:37 pm |
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 1:54 pm |
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thud419
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Jan 2006
Posts: 3193
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:12 pm |
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Now you're having us on. You cannot get lost in a vehicle that does not have a steering wheel. |
_________________ Click here to feel warm and cozy.
I did not f**k your wife in any way -- Nike Akanbi
I don't know what else to do or do I continue filling and filling forms. -- Barr. Koloti
you has been dribbling me up and down but I will show some thing you have never seen before, I think you breath air wait and see. -- Barr. Cole
x14
x 0.25 won from Reaper in a sucker's bet
x8 x several |
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:35 pm |
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Craig007
Baiting Guru
Joined: 19 Apr 2007
Posts: 3123
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:03 pm |
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Quote: |
I thought pilots had computers telling them? |
Ha! Slightly simpler than that... |
_________________ CAN VISA BE GIVING IN THE PLANE? YOUR QUEEN ELIZABETH CAN NOT TAKE VISA IN THE PLANE,TALKLESS OF YOU - WILLIAM PAUL
x7
Wulugu or Bust Safari- Lagos, Nigeria to Paga, Ghana and Tokwari, Ghana X2-3800mi. "I'm leaving this bullshit area"
- Accra to Cotonou - 430 miles
100% RISK FREE TRANSACTION
CHERRIE MENTOR PROGRAM |
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thud419
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Jan 2006
Posts: 3193
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:08 pm |
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Just pulling your leg, Jay. I'm sure you can get yourself in a hell of a mess at 125mph if you don't know where you are and what you're expecting. |
_________________ Click here to feel warm and cozy.
I did not f**k your wife in any way -- Nike Akanbi
I don't know what else to do or do I continue filling and filling forms. -- Barr. Koloti
you has been dribbling me up and down but I will show some thing you have never seen before, I think you breath air wait and see. -- Barr. Cole
x14
x 0.25 won from Reaper in a sucker's bet
x8 x several |
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Tuco
Elite Baiter
Joined: 08 Aug 2007
Posts: 1098
Location: On a desert safari.
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:14 pm |
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I have a friend, who while distraught over a personal tragedy, intended to drive several hundred miles south to visit friends in Tennessee. Many hours later and three hundred miles north, she stopped to ask directions in Scranton, Pennsylvania. |
_________________ "My broda. i like ur guts it shows u are a full guy." - Williams H0lm
"you should understand my brain problem." - R0se Br0wn
"you are a very ungreatful and wicked person." - Veronica K0ffi
"Thanks for giving me a nauthy number that preys unit like a hungry lion." - Alise Kar1m
"I have called you more than 20 times but non of the calls went through." - Williams C0ker
"I've said in my previous mail that I do not understand English." - Cabinet Bad0u
"PLEASE MY CHAIRMAN, I AM NOT GREEDY, I LIKE TO WORK WITH YOU, I HAVE LOST MANY OF MY JOBS , PLS PLS PLS, I WILL WORK HARD WITH U." - Dr. Lui$ James
"There are two kinds of people in the world, my friend."
x8 (Thanks Corona) |
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Inspector Gadget
Angel of unrealistic meetings
Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 6259
Location: Trumpton
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 4:22 pm |
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Quote: |
I'm sure you can get yourself in a hell of a mess at 125mph |
Pah! slowcoach!
Not only do we get tested, but every two years we have another rules test.
Now I have 2 rule books so I'll be getting 2 tests?
Passenger runs down stairs looks at me
"Is this Victoria?"
"no, mate, this is Bromley, but we're going to Victoria"
We have to put codes in the Passenger Information System.
There is one for semi-fast trains from Ashford to Victoria, it's '419'....
I wonder how we still manage to get there. |
_________________ x2 Co bait with Rumbero Sao Tome island to Gabon van donation
Co bait with Jayhawk and VJD. Stanley's bottle tour Aba to Lagos
Team Hector, airport in installments and St Louis to Kayes
Halil, Cotonou to Accra
+ Precious 10/08/11
x8 x34 x 73
grown up man like him, still doing all this shit games - Stanley, (he doesn't like Parcel Direct)
You again do the strange reflections stuffed with drugs? - Natalia
x3 Hector 24/1/13 Moses 15th Oct 2011
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 5:37 pm |
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I love it when I was Train Manager and they would come running at me saying is this Manchester? No we are in Birmingham, Or IG might be able to relate to this, You are on an early morning service, (As train manager) falling asleep leaning on the train and someone comes runing over shouting at you and your like eh eh eh?
Was I wrong saying you have to buy new tickets? |
_________________
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Version2 of the Moneygram form courtesy of manbiteslion with a 9 digit MTCN
nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
Free Pastor Frank |
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Fo'andles
Elite Baiter
Joined: 06 Jul 2007
Posts: 1654
Location: busy doing nothing, somewhere
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 7:37 pm |
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Having been a Train Manager on the London Underground, i don't think you were wrong, Jay, just remember your neck is always on the line and they would not have cared if you had lost your job, what higher ups do, is up to them, we can moan we get no backing, when they give refunds, but you notice they don't tell us, not to take action you took.
Every transport system in the world, private or national has its funny passengers and don't forget the staff, including managers, can be funny at times.
Years ago had an American approach me, when i was on a trains, with the question "How do i get to Leicester Square", had to point out this is Leicester Square, did not get any thanks, other people on the platform, just shook their heads in disbelief.
Also had one of the bosses come to me with a passenger complaint, said i had given a passenger the wrong information, my answer was, The correct information was given to the wrong idiot.
Seems like the bosses had come across these idiots, never heard anymore about it. |
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Jay leno
train boi
Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697
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Posted:
Thu Aug 20, 2009 7:57 pm |
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@Fo I totally agree Managers are turds. Even though I tried helping he still moans, He wants the britrail portion and the portion I sold him refunding and he said I pocketed the money!
I mean why! I get paid fairly well anyway why would I rip off any customer |
_________________
Western Union Modality
Leno Phone Modality
My MoneyGram form
Version2 of the Moneygram form courtesy of manbiteslion with a 9 digit MTCN
nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
Free Pastor Frank |
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N N N
Master of Master Baiters
Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Posts: 689
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Posted:
Fri Aug 21, 2009 6:52 am |
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Inspector Gadget wrote: |
.... Passenger runs down stairs ... |
What train service is this? |
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Badgerbait
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jan 2009
Posts: 4507
Location: Winter spites...
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Posted:
Mon Aug 24, 2009 7:30 pm |
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Being an American, I think I will hail a cab, trains would be more nostalgia or doing the tourist thing I think. Is there signifigant price differences between cabs and trains? |
_________________ I have arrived in Moscow. Has gone to bank and to me have told that there is no such transfer for me!!!!
What does it mean? You played with me? If it so that you very much the cruel man and I am assured of that that the god will see your cruelty.
Explain to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Alena Byk0va
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x13 x3 x4
We are Karma's soldiers.
<a href="/forum/donate.php">Mugu Gold</a>
I must be cruel, only to be kind:
Thus bad begins and worse remains behind. -Hamlet, scene iv
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