John Sparrow format - De-education Bait

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Posted: Mon Aug 17, 2009 6:17 pm

RePsy, you owe me a new keyboard!!! I spit out my coffee when I read this one......

Quote:

Has your ship been blown to bits by the bloodthirsty fleets of the East India Trading Company?
Was your crew hanged? Keelhauled? Shot? Stabbed? Burned? Drowned? Frozen? Molested? Cut? Sliced? Diced? Fucked up, yo?

Well, there is good news. The newly passed Pirate Protection Act provides funds to get the seven sea's most bloodthirsty pirates back on their feet after a deadly encounter with the EITC. It offers full reimbursement of crew, plunder, and supplies to needy pirates such as yourself.
For a long time, no one sought for pirates' rights. That has all changed. Since the EITC started hunting down pirates, the rum, prosthetics, tattoo, smuggling, and eye patch industries have suffered. Pirates are now seen as a precious consumer and source of income for many companies (minus those that trade by sea).

I am Dave 3. Jon3s, a federal lawyer who can help you obtain your well-deserved reimbursement. If you wish to make a claim through the PPA, please send me these details:

Name:
Ship Name:
Parrot/Monkey's Name:
Damages done by the EITC:

Sincerely,
Dave E. J0nes
F1yan-Dutc4mann L3gal

My reply:

A'vast ye mate! I be Alex the Red Star Fish! I get me starfish corn holed in the south seas!! I wants me pay back in kind!

Name: Alex Fair
Ship Name: Fair '3'
Parrot/Monkey's Name: Fair 'L' '3'
Damages done by the EITC: They fuck mes' up!! Now me dog pregnant!! I wants me pay back from th'scum!!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 05 Aug 2009 Posts: 49

i got the same thing too. ill think up a nice reply soon Smile

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 29 Jul 2009 Posts: 14

Reverse Phychology wrote:

Sending lads viruses is frowned upon here, even if it is suspected that he has his own computer.

RP, what I sent him has been "sanitized". It is no longer, per se, a virus, its just a "junk" file. There shouldn't be any danger of it infecting anything.

419Eater is my life Joined: 02 Aug 2008 Posts: 435

^^Sorry, I saw "virus" and it threw up red flags. I don't even have an antivirus program, so I am not well versed in their workings. Embarassed

@AL1VE: I agree with the kidnap plan. If he does back out, then perhaps G0mer could suggest a partnership in robbing J0nath4n of the money in his bank account. G0mer opens all the doors with his 1337 hacking skillz, his Boyz meet our boi at a "checkpoint" to hand off the money and throw the authorities off their tracks.
J0n sends a flustered email the day G0mer withdraws the money, saying that all his money has disappeared! Cue G0mer telling the lad to haul ass off to Ghana to meet up with his Boyz.

That's if our boi doesn't make the jump to Abidjan. With my luck, he probably won't Evil or Very Mad

Master Baiter Joined: 27 Jun 2009 Posts: 181

Okay, since my last update, I have gotten quite some progress with the lad...
First off I fired this off at him:

Quote:

RE: New bank details!‏
Dear beloved son

I have recieved your email. It is good to know that you trust your hire headman now. Thank you for supplying me his bank details before I went down to the bank. It's really sad to see that you can't even trust bank managers now. What is the world becoming???

I have gone down to the bank to wire $5500 USD to your headman, Mr. G0m3r. Please tell him to go check his bank as I think it should be done by now. You can now set off for the treasure as soon as possible!

Please tell me when you have it. Thank you and may god bless you my son.
Love forever
Mike Ocksmall

Yup, I had G0m3r strike again. The lad went completely crazy xD:

Quote:

GO TO BANK AND STOP THE PAYMENT DADDY‏
My Beloved Daddy,

It was surprised to me when you said you sent money to the bank details of Mr.Gomer and I have told you before that the name of hire master was Douglas Morgan which I asked to send money to through money gram or western union but I said am not trust him that you should the money to hotel manager where I was lodging and daddy I want you to tell me if you sent money to Mr.Gomer or Not and if yes please go back to your bank to stop the payment because you are sending money to a wrong person and like I told you before that some body is checking my emails at my back and that’s why I don’t use the email account am using before to contact you and now am using this one and you can even informed that someone has sent you a bank information to send the money to on my behalf which I don’t know what is going on daddy.

PLEASE DADDY YOU HAVE TO GO TO YOUR BANK AND STOP THE PAYMENT YOU SENT TO HIM BECAUSE HE IS NOT THE HIRE MASTER I WENT TO AND THE HIRE MASTER NAME WAS DOUGLAS MORGAN AND THE HOTEL MANAGER YOU ARE GOING TO SEND THE MONEY TO HIS ON THE VISA CARD I GAVE YOU TO YOU.

HERE IS THE RIGHT PERSON YOU ARE GOING TO SEND THE MONEY DADDY BELOW,

Name of the Visa Debit Card;

**SNIP***

Visa Card numbers;

***SNIP***

The expired date which means as valid thru;

**SNIP**

The hotel sever is going now and I will be waiting to read from you as soon as possible.

Please go right now to stop the payment to Mr.Gomer.

Waiting to read from you daddy.

Your beloved son

John Ocksmall

I sense fear... and LOTS of it mwahahahahahaahaha. Well he sent me about 3-4 different emails from different accounts all telling me to immediatly stop the payment.

So anyway to keep this post short i'll just summarize everything. I went to the bank and the people there gave me some anti-terrorism forms to fill out if I wanted to stop the payment. If Mr. Lad there didn't fill them out in a week, the payment would go through to G0m3r.
Here's the result:

http://img38.imageshack.us/i/99062337.jpg/
http://img23.imageshack.us/i/31166878.jpg/
http://img134.imageshack.us/i/59419179.jpg/
http://img504.imageshack.us/i/37228769.jpg/
http://img31.imageshack.us/i/36734940.jpg/

Of course he got a huge slap for not even trying to fill out anything. He basically slapped "No" on everything. And he didn't even get his ass out of his chair to take a picture with the P.R.A.T. sign...
So anyways after the slap he decided to re-fill 2 of the forms and send me the picture:

http://img23.imageshack.us/i/94713066.jpg/
http://img504.imageshack.us/i/61480189.jpg/
http://img31.imageshack.us/i/42731648.jpg/

With that he sent me MY SECOND PIGGY!!!!!!!

Quote:

My Beloved Daddy,

How are you and I hope you are feeling fine and may God bless you and I have reprint 2 form out and refilled them back to you and I have also took the picture with the P.R.T holding in my hand for you and I want you to print this picture out and put it on the form I sent to you last time Ok.

Here is the hire headman Mr. D0uglas M0rg4n bank details where you are going to send the money to and please as soon as you wire the money into the Mr. D0uglas account I will need the payment slip of the money you transfer so that he can take it to his bank to confirm the money.

B4nqu3 4tlantiqu3 B3n1n

Swift Code: ##bjbjbj (He sure likes bj's... XD)

Account Number: #########0161

Benificary: International Brokers

Don’t worry about send my email to the revered you said and it seems Gomer don’t enter my email anymore because I have changed my password ok Daddy.

One more thing, as soon as you make the transfer of the money to Mr. Douglas bank account please send me the transfer slip so that I can show him that the money you have made the payment in his account.

I will be waiting to read from you as soon as everything has been done by you.

I love you and hope to see you soon face to face.

Your loving son

John Ocksmall

And that's basically it lol. *whew* that was a long post.

419Eater is my life Joined: 02 Aug 2008 Posts: 435

This lad is your bitch, Loupeitak. Congrats on the second trophy (whether or not it is actually him) and the second piggy Very Happy

So, based on his drawing, boy + farm = man? Fair enough. Laughing

Master Baiter Joined: 27 Jun 2009 Posts: 181

Hehe and check out the drawing on the bottom right. I have no idea what that is but it looks to be an animal being raped or something...

He refuses to contact my reverend to get some money and his hacker-free software. Well then, I refuse to send him any money until he gets this protection. I don't wanna send money off to a hacker now do I? Twisted Evil

419Eater is my life Joined: 02 Aug 2008 Posts: 435

^^Indeed, those hackas be everywhere Laughing

This from G0mer to our boi:

Quote:

GUY I DONT TALK ON PHONE TO ANY1 I HAVENT MET..THE EFCC IS ALWAYS OUT TO GET ME ND HAVE TOO BE CAREFUL

I WILL MEET U IN ABIDJAN SO WE CAN TALK FACE 2 FACE ND I MAKE UR PHON SECURE SO WE CAN CALL EACH OTHER

WHEN U COME TO ABIDJAN GO TO HOTEL TIAMA AND MENTION MY NAME..DAT BE WERE I MEET J0NATH4N

HE IS BRING 10000 DOLLAR AS DEPOSIT FOR ME ND HE HAS HUNDREDS THOUSANDS MORE IN HIS BANK I THINK WE KIDNAP HIM ND MAKE HIM GIVE US THE MONIES

I THINK WE WIL DO 50/50 ON DIS JOB..ALL U HAV 2 DO IS HELP WIT DI CONVINCE OF DI MAGA

COME TO ABIDJAN ND I WILL EXPLAIN THE REST OF DI DEAL

U WIL BE A G0MER B0YZ ONCE DIS BE OVER

@AL1VE: Tell the lad that if he wishes to get in on the deal, that he can meet you and G0mer at the Hotel Tiama in Abidjan, and that you're bringing the 10k as a deposit. That should give us both some credibility Smile

From Vikt0r to idiot:

Quote:

Tell him that the case number can only be seen with special Negat1ve Positr0nic Spect4cles™, and that the code's power level is over 9000 maximum sub-atomic drive mode. Trust me, he will believe you, since he is a dumb American, after all. His eyes will probably glaze over after the second word, and just skip over the entire sentence.

How is your money situation going regarding the travel to Abidjan? Have you obtained the necessary funds? Are you packed and ready to go?

The next part of the script will be sent to you immediately.

Victor Lustig

So, if you receive this excuse, say you understand completely. Or, you could have your character say that they tried that before, but the power level wasn't over 9000 Laughing

Next part of the format:

Quote:

Subject line: Pir4te Pr0tection Act [Case #[number used before]]‏

Dear [name],

Thank you for your swift response in dealing with the certificate, I have submitted it to the courts. However, the court also requires you to provide a description of the event in which your ship was sunk by the E1TC. Please try to provide as much detail as possible when talking about who killed who, and how it made you feel.

Sincerely,
B4rrister D4ve E. Jones
Fly4n-Dutchm4nn Legal

Sorry if the latest script hasn't been particularly amusing, I have simply been trying to stall him until he goes to Abidjan, where hopefully he will be stuck or arrested Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 10:57 am

I received some format from this lad today I beleive. Pirate talk. hahahahahaha

419Eater is my life Joined: 20 Jan 2009 Posts: 445

@Loupeitak

Very nice Very Happy

@RP

Done Twisted Evil

419Eater is my life Joined: 30 May 2009 Posts: 298

He keeps calling people "mommy" and "daddy". I found that bizzare when my friend Reuben addressed his actual biological mother that way, and I can't express how creepy it is that scammers are so often doing that to complete strangers.

I guess it's a cultural divide and I should be a little more tolerant.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 18 Mar 2009 Posts: 41

Just Wasting his time.....

Quote:

Date: Mon, 17 Aug 2009 11:38:32 -0400
> Subject: Re: Pirate Protection Act [Case #[random number]]
> From: ****@gmail.com
> To: [email protected]
- Hide quoted text -

>
>

His response reflects some tensions in his operations...I think

Until I download a fake moneygram slip, I sent him this:

Quote:

DON'T YELL AT ME LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN!!!!! WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, SOME DOG THAT YOU CAN KICK AROUND? SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN, AND I WILL ASK TO SPEAK TO YOUR CAPTAIN IN CHARGE, YOU GOT THAT!!!???

It appears that someone has tried to hack into my email account and
sneak an encription program into it. That is why the message was so
irregular. I have my security team combing over my computer to ensure
that none of those scurvy scoundrals have pillaged my information.

I will have your MoneyGram information by sunset today.

can you please resend the certificate? My parrot has gnawed a hole in mine.

Much appreciated...

I'm new at this, and not NEARLY as creative as some of you masters, so my learning curve is slower. Anyone have a quick link to a blurred, LARGE or shredded moneygram slip?

Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:03 pm

I randomly told him to apologize to me "for being so rude," even though he hadn't really done anything. This guy makes me want to eat my own vomit.

Quote:

My Dearest Mummy,

I know that I have hurt you for what I've done and but it is not my fault mummy and I am asking for your forgiveness and hoping that we could start all over again. I really cherish those moments when i called you on a phone and you have a loving voice mummy and everything was going great, and you're so cool. I could hardly take the reality of losing you mummy because you are my everything i cherish so much in my life. I really want you back mummy and you knew i have lost my parent and you are the only one there for me now.

If loving you was wrong, I don't want to be right and if living without you is right, I would rather be wrong all my life. I love you mummy and I always will.

I am very sorry to heard about the men who want to cheat you in south down but glory be to lord that is not possible for them to cheat you mummy,and again where the infomation you are going to send the $1,550 to me through western union money transfer mummy and you can text the reference number to me on my phone number as soon you send the money to me mummy +234xxxxxxxxx

John Sparr0w
# 78 ak**** street off ol****e
City. Ibandan
Country.Nigeria
Qustion.What for
Answer.My Son John
MTCN Number of the money you send to me Mummy.

I will be waiting to read from you and your loving son is thinking about you and God will continue bless you Amen.

Love always,
John Sparr0w

I'm so cool!

ETA: Now he's sent me a ghastly Mother's Day poem along with more begging. I told him I'm going out in 15 minutes and he better call his mummy.
ETA more: He called me and we talked about nothing very interesting except Dr. Gomer, again for exactly 2 minutes and 45 seconds. I guess that's how much phone credit he can afford each day. But it was enough to give me an evil idea...

Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 9:25 pm

Nothing back from him on my end yet.... I feel so un loved...

Smile

Master Baiter Joined: 27 Jun 2009 Posts: 181

Hey, just a question RP and Alive. When are you planning on setting him on the safari? I've got a few plans for him, but I don't want to interfere with your safari.

Oh and has he sent out the formats to the new "victim's list"? Cause I haven't gotten anything from him yet Sad

419Eater is my life Joined: 20 Jan 2009 Posts: 445

^It was supposed to be this week (Thursday / Friday) but I haven't heard from him yet.

419Eater is my life Joined: 02 Aug 2008 Posts: 435

^^Just got this from our boi to V1ktor:

Quote:

Dear v1ctor I got all the mail you sent to me with the next format and I want you to know that fucking Olatunji G0mez has control one of my victims to come and meet him in Abidjan and the client is now in Abidjan with some money and G0mez sent an email that I should come and meet in Abidjan so that we share the money and I should joined his gang and I tell him no way to joined his gang all I want his my own share of my client because he knew it my client who you gave me and I tried all my possible best for confused the client and the client doesn’t listening to me so what did you think about this …..

I will be waiting to read from you and tell you how the victims are doing about the new format you gave me hum…

One love from your guy ….

Isn't he a loyal one? Also, G0mer = G0mez now?
Well, he's not getting away that easily:

Quote:

Excellent! This is the perfect chance! If you go to Abidjan and do the job with him, then you will gain his trust and be my spy! In addition, while you are there, you can pick up the payment. Trust me, you want to go and do this, it will be very profitable for us both. You have my approval to join the G0mer B0yz, as long as you act as my spy and tell me G0mer's plans.

This is a once in a lifetime chance, don't blow it. Go to Abidjan as soon as possible, and tell G0mer you agree to do as he asks.

As far as I'm concerned, this opportunity is not lost yet!

Master Baiter Joined: 27 Jun 2009 Posts: 181

Best of luck with your safari! I'll get that hat one day, I hope.

Let's just hope that after he goes on safari, he wont lose out contact on me! I'm not done with this lad yet Razz

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 16 May 2007 Posts: 83

I've been playing with him much more straight-baited, but I got him to fill out a form (twice) after he failed to follow instructions the first time.

Given the failure to properly make the security photo, I plan to slap him, but only after I've let it go a couple days. Plus, in the initial e-mail he's in Cote d'Ivoire and now in Ghana? Hmmmmmm......

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 3:48 pm

Ok, I am loved again!!! With out having to re-read this entire thing, can some one tell me what I should send him?

Quote:

Dear Al3x,

.....you will need to provide proof of pi racy. This is most commonly referred to as a pie ce of 8

I am looking forward to your quick response.

Sincerely,
Barrister Dave 3.

Master Baiter Joined: 27 Jun 2009 Posts: 181

I believe you are to send a picture of something random. Doesnt matter what it is, so long as it confuses the lad (more than he already is, anyway :p)

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 4:58 pm

^^^^^ Oooooooooo...!!!!

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 5:13 pm

^^^

Quote:

Ahoy me mat3i3! I am gr3viously pleased ye has conc 3nted to parly with me in my claims against the savage scum!

It was nigh near 10 months ago when me crew sighted in on a ship from the empire of Germany, we took the vessel and gave all but one to the locker. (We let em one so as to tale the tail!) Bo nVo ration! but we find we had seazed a cargo of Flu xCapa sotors! Highly prizs3d by the Dr and the Cra zy 8 8s'. But the dreded killers showed while I was at the buggering and took near all me men and the booty with 'em. I and a few bairly had the time to abandon ship, and me with out the stank for my hang low!

Here is a photo of one of the few I still gots' in me hold. And tel me, could ye find me a buyer do you thinks? I am told a Mr. M. Mc Fly, was in the market for a few rounds the 1870s

Attached pic of the device.... hehehehehehehe

Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 7:33 pm

Everything is proceeding according to my plan Twisted Evil

IP 41.184.32.14 Lagos.

Quote:

Dear Mrs. S@ra Be|um,

I will like to introduce my self to you; I am Doct0r J0nathan Mike in Lag0s state General Hospital, doctor in charge of health care of your son Mr. J0hn Sparr0w who came to our hospital some few minutes ago for his medical check up.

What I discovered after checking him up was that he is suffering of an internal injury and he feels distressed, his final check up result will come up in 2 hours time to now.

...blah blah blah...

You will be thinking how we get your contact details; it was your son that gave this to us

I will like you to get back to us as soon as possible.

Best regards
Dr J0nathan Mike

Sorry to get him so far off your excellent scripts.

ETA: Sparr0w is convinced that I am worried sick about his mental health, so now he is promising to check into a psychiatric hospital. Listen to how he gets tied in knots when his mummy cries. He obviously has serious problems.

Sparr0w comforts his mum by shouting at her

Every one of my calls now ends with me crying and cutting him off. He loves that.

419Eater is my life Joined: 02 Aug 2008 Posts: 435

We are very close to the safari, but it seems the lad has something planned that day:

Quote:

I AM VERY HAPPY WITH YOUR LOVING MAIL YOU SENT TO ME AND I HOPE WE ARE THE SAME BLOOD BROTHER FAMILY GUYMAN AND I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN BY EFCC AND SOMEONE MUST BECAREFUL ABOUT THEM.

I WISH TO COME AND MEET YOU IN ABIDJAN TO SEE FACE TO FACE AND ONE OF MY BOY DEM CALLED ME TODAY THAT HE HAVE A JOB THAT IS COMING FROM DUBAI FOR WASH WASH AND I MUST BE THERE TO JOINED THEM IN THE PARO AND THE MAGA IS GOING TO LAND IN TOGO LATER IN THE DAY EVENING.

MY BROTHER YOU CAN HANDLE MY CLIENT J0NATHAN ISSUE BECAUSE I WILL SEND HIM A MAIL NOW THAT YOU ARE MY LATE FATHER BARRISTER ASSOCIATE AND YOU CAN HANDLE THE PROCESSING OF THE TREASURE HUNT AND YOU WILL SHOW HIM WHERE MY LATE FATHER BURIED THE TREASURE CHEST BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE MAP WITH YOU AND THE CLUES AND I WILL ALSO TELL THE CLIENT THAT MY UNCLES ARE AFTER ME AND IT HAPPEN THAT THEY KNOW THAT AM IN ABIDJAN THEY ARE GOING TO KILL ME .

SO MY BROTHER THATS WHAT AM GOING TO WRITE HIM NOW OK AND I HOPE IT IS GOOD FOR US LIKE THAT.

MY BROTHER WE DONT NEED TO SPLIT THE MONEY 50/50 SINCE YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS GOING TO ATTEND THE CLIENT AND THE CLIENT HAVE SENT ME A MAIL THAT YOU ARE SO NICE AND I WILL EVEN COPY THE MAIL MY CLIENT JONATHAN SENT TO ME YESTERDAY FOR YOU AND YOU ARE GOING TO TAKE 60 WHILE YOU GIVE ME 40 AND THATS THE DEAL MY BROTHER. Isn't he generous? Or, rather, being sneaky and trying to butter G0mer up?

I WILL LOOKING FORWARD TO HEAR FROM YOU AND ONE LOVE TO ALL THE GOMER BOYS AND WISHING OF ALL GREAT GOMER SUCESSFUL IN EVERY THING WE ARE DOING AMEN.

[pasted below was AL1VE's latest email to him]

AL1VE, do you think it would be possible for us to postpone the meeting with G0mer? We could tell him that we wish to meet him at the same time. Or, whatever else you can think of. We really can't let this opportunity pass us by. Evil or Very Mad

I know we have plan B, the bank account theft, but I don't want to bring that out yet. I may allude to it in my next email from G0mer. Something like, I need his help getting the money out of the country, which is why I need him to be there.

To V1ktor:

Quote:

V1ktor i dont understand you any more and you want me to joined their gang well i will be thinking about this later and i have another thing i want to share with you before about him because G0mer have been enter the Barr dave victims email address you gave to me and here what the victims say and i have given a code as he requsted for.

Thank you for your apology. I'm not sure it was sincere, but we willproceed anyway. My security team has found an encryption bug on my hard drive. Areyou aware of any attempts by your uncles to monitor our conversation.My team has said this bug is the highest quality, that only anexperienced hacker could plant a code this complicated. Perhaps we should work on a code word so that I know I am talking tomy true lawyer? What do you think? On 8/19/09, D4ve Jones

Be a bit careful with the dolla chop stuff until this lad has been safaried, we don't want to lose his newfound trust in G0mer.

@bohigal: I wonder if he is starting to get freaked out over how attached you are to him? The phone call was hilarious, great acting Very Happy

And it's good that he has finally admitted to being crazy. Admission is the first step to recovery Laughing

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