I wrote a poem...

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Hello I'm New here! Joined: 07 Aug 2009 Posts: 2

You do not know me; this email may well come as a surprise,
My name is Peters David, and I bring news of a great unexpected prize.
You are the sole beneficiary of a dead manâ€™s secret trust,
But do not tell anyone about this deal, your complicit secrecy is a must.

Please send me your details, your full name, address, and number I can dial,
I will also need a scanned copy of your passport; it will be added to your file.
This is a very important business transaction, I am sure you will agree,
So follow my instructions carefully, these dealings are one hundred percent risk free.

Please resend your passport, the copy you sent to me is far from clear,
It was nice to speak to you on the phone, your sounded trustworthy and sincere.
Now you must contact the security company, they are based in Madrid, Spain,
Tell them you wish to receive your fund by diplomatic courier they will bring it on a plane.

Please resend your passport, the last one you send I could not view,
I have sent you a copy of the release document, please download it and review.
You have not contacted the security company, please hurry so we can conclude this deal,
Also you are never answering your phone, are you sure you are for real?

Please resend your passport, this one was too big to fit into my account,
The security company have contacted me, they say that you must pay the full amount.
Please send the payment to Lagos, Nigeria via Western Union Money Transfer,
It must be sent to Barrister Femi Davids, you can use Moneygram if you prefer.

Thank you for making the payment, we need some information in order to collect,
Please scan in the transfer receipt, and email to me here, that would be perfect.
I will then go to the Western Union, and receive your payment fees,
So please scan in the documentation today, and send it quickly to me please.

There appears to be a problem, the scanned copy of the receipt did not send,
Please write out the information that we need, so that we can collect it as you intend.
I need the senderâ€™s name and address, and the city to which that is was sent,
I need to collect the fees today, in order that you can receive the fund one hundred percent.

Sir there has been another problem, I tried to collect the fees without success,
I went to the Western Union, but there is no transfer under the number you supplied us.
The number for money transfer is 8 digits, the number you forwarded to me is ten,
So please carefully copy down the number into an email, and send it to me again.

WHY DO YOU KEEP SENDING ME TO THE WESTERN UNION TO COLLECT NON-EXISTANT TRANSFERS?
THERE IS NO TRANSFER UNDER THE NUMBER YOU GAVE, THEY SAY THAT THE TRANSFER NEVER OCCURS.
THE TEST QUESTION â€œWHY DO BIRDS SUDDENLY APPEAR, EVERY TIME, YOU ARE NEAR?â€ IS A FAKE,
I THINK YOU ARE A JOKER AND ARE PLAYING GAMES WITH ME, I HOPE THIS IS JUST A MISTAKE.

I AM NOT A SCAMMER I AM A MAN OF SOME INTERNATIONAL REPUTATION,
YOU ARE MISSING OUT ON ALL OF THIS MONEY AND YOU SHOULD GIVE IN TO TEMPTATION.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU ARE A CONFIRMED JOKER AND AS SUCH I HOPE THAT YOU DIE
YOU HAVE MESSED WITH THE WRONG MAN HERE, I WILL HURT YOU ON THAT YOU CAN RELY!

Thank you and goodnight.

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 1:56 pm

Good one jd Thumbs up

Welcome here Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 3123

I wrote a poem to my wife - she divorced me the next day Wink

Nah, only joking - I'm sure you can tell I'm the morbid one around here.

Do all the usual stuff, read the stickies, get a mentor. Judging from the poem though, you have a good grasp of what we do Smile

Enjoy

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 07 Aug 2009 Posts: 2

Don't worry about me, I've been baiting for 3-4 years and was a regular here once, before I lost my password and the email address it was registered with!

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:12 pm

PM me your old username and I'll see if I can get it sorted.

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:29 pm

That is so brilliant!

I love the 'Please resend your passport...' lines: presumably to be quoted through gritted teeth. Very Happy

But all so funny.

And a good synopsis of a bait!

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2008 Posts: 619

Very nice. Sums baiting up very well and should maybe be required reading for the newcomers!

Master Baiter Joined: 02 Aug 2009 Posts: 144

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jan 2009 Posts: 1440

Love it! It's brilliant, funny and so sadly true.

I'm sure someone with your talent and imagination must cause considerable pain to the laddies.

Just too bad you couldn't work "Remain Bless" in there. Laughing

Not quite a Newb Joined: 31 May 2009 Posts: 76

Awesome poem.. I love it!! clapping

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:01 pm

Nice!

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 10:09 pm

Very entertaining! Yep, that pretty much encapsulates the process of a straight bait...with rhythm and lyricism. Should be required reading for newbies!

Posted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 10:28 pm

nice one i love it

bow_down