Fear and Loathing in Lagos!

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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2004 7:24 pm

Fear and Loathing in Lagos! a.k.a Slapfest Galore!

Warning! Very rude with lots of foul language!

This is my first completed bait, it was a quickie. Smile

I intended to bait as "Raoul Duke". If you have seen or read "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" you will know what I'm talking about.

However, the lad was so stupid I drifted into a mix of Raoul Duke and Gunnery Sgt. Hartman from Full Metal Jacket.

I'll try to keep it more weird in the future. This was apparently a bit too abusive, at least for this lad.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Introducing:
Otunba Daniels, Nigeria

Raoul Duke, owner of the fictional company Raoul Duke Pharmaceuticals.

My comments are written in red.

Standard mugu mail, I actually got a copy of this one today, with the name changed in some places, not all. Rolling Eyes

From Otunba Daniels Wed Aug 11 21:17:34 2004
X-Apparently-To: [email protected] via 206.190.38.221; Wed, 11 Aug 2004 21:28:19 -0700
X-Originating-IP: [192.118.71.126]
Return-Path: <[email protected]>
Received: from 192.118.71.126 (EHLO omail4.walla.co.il) (192.118.71.126) by mta359.mail.scd.yahoo.com with SMTP; Wed, 11 Aug 2004 21:28:17 -0700
Date: Thu, 12 Aug 2004 07:17:34 +0300
Received: from ([213.255.211.157]) by omail4.walla.co.il ([192.118.71.126]) with HTTP; Thu, 12 Aug 2004 07:17:33 +0300

From: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>
X-Sender: [email protected]
X-Originating-Email: [[email protected]]
X-Originating-IP: [213.255.211.157]
Bcc:

Subject: Hello.....Pls get back to me
Message-Id: <[email protected]>
Content-Type: multipart/mixed; boundary="------=_EREZ_P_WallaMail_26097_7538_P_0"
Content-Length: 2696

FROM: THE DESK OF OTUNBA DANIELS
CREDIT CONTROL UNIT.
UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC.
PRIVATE EMAIL: [email protected] (PLEASE SEND YOUR REPLY TO THIS MAIL BOX).

STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I KNOW THIS PROPOSAL WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE EXPECIALLY WHEN YOU DO NOT KNOW THE WRITER,CONDSIDERING THE HUGE SUM OF MONEY INVOLVED WHICH COULD MAKE ANY APPREHENSIVE.

LET ME START BY INTRODUCING MYSELF TO YOU, I AM OTUNBA DANIELS, A STAFF OF UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC. LAGOS. I SAW YOUR CONTACT DURING MY PRIVATE SEARCH AT THE INFORMATION CENTRE HERE IN NIGERIA CHAMBER OF COMMENCE AND INDUSTRY AND I WANT TO BELIEVE THAT YOU WILL BE VERY HONEST,COMMITTED AND CAPABLE OF ASSISTING IN THIS BUSINESS VENTURE.

LET ME EXPLAIN THE SOURCE OF THIS FUNDS AND WHAT YOU ARE EXPECTED TO DO.A FORIGNER LATE ENGR. THEOPHILUS BAKER, AN OIL MERCHANT/CONTRACTOR WITH THE GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA, UNTIL HIS DEATH, OVER A YEAR AGO,WAS A VICTIM OF A KENYA AIRWAYS: BUS (A310-300) FLIGHT KQ430 PLANE CRASH.THE DECEASED,ENGR.THEOPILIUS
BAKER, BANKED WITH US AND HAS A CLOSING BALANCE AS A JULY 2000 WORTH $4.5M (FOUR MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOSAND USD).WHICH MY BANK,NOW EXPECTS A NEXT-OF-KIN TO CLAIM AS THE BENEFICIARY OF THE FUNDS, EFFORTS HAS BEEN MADE BY UNION BANK OF NIGERIA TO GET IN TOUCH WITH THE BAKER'S FAMILY OR RELATIVE BUT TO NO SUCCESS.

BASED ON THE PERCEIVED POSSIBILITY OF NOT BEING ABLE TO LOCATE ENGR.THEOPILUS'S NEXT-OF-KIN, THE MANAGEMENT UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF OUR CHAIRMAN AND THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS ARE MAKING ARRANGEMENTS FOR THE FUNDS TO BE DECLARED UNCLAIMED AND CHANNELED TO AN UNKNOWN ACCOUNT.IT IS BASED ON THIS THAT WE HAVE CONTACTED YOU TO STAND AS THE NEXT-OF-KIN OF LATE ENGR. THEOPILOUS BAKER SO THAT THE FUNDS, WILL BE RELEASED AND PAID INTO YOUR ACCOUNT AS THE BENEFICIARY AND THE NEXT-OF-KIN TO THE DECEASED.

ALL DOCUMENTS, AND PROOF TO ENABLE YOU GET THE FUNDS HAVE BEEN CAREFULLY WORKED OUT AS WE HAVE SECURED FROM THE DIFFERENT OFFICES CONCERNED FOR THE SMOOTH TRANSFER OF THE FUND TO YOUR NOMINATED ACCOUNT.IT HAS BEEN AGREED THAT THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT WILL BE COMPENSATED WITH 20% OF THE REMITTED FUNDS, WHILE WE KEEP 75% AND 5% WILL BE SET ASIDE TO OFFSET EXPENSES BOTH LOCALLY AND INTERNATIONAL

.

IF THIS PROPOSAL SATISFIES YOU, PLEASE REACH US ONLY BY MAIL OR PHONE, FOR MORE INFORMATION. IT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT TO GET THROUGH TO ME,BECAUSE OF POOR TELECOMUNICATION SYSTEM HERE. PLEASE KEEP TRYING YOU WILL DEFINITELY GET THROUGH.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,

OTUNBA DANIELS

NB: PLEASE SEND ALL CORESPONDENCE TO MY PRIVATE EMAIL :
([email protected] )IN GOOD FAITH

Stock reply.

Date: Thu, 12 Aug 2004 05:47:20 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Re: Hello.....Pls get back to me
To: [email protected]

Mr Daniels,

thank you for your mail.
I am very interested in your proposal. Tell me more!
What needs to be done?

=====
Raoul Duke

Raoul Duke Pharmaceuticals

From Otunba Daniels Thu Aug 12 07:30:18 2004
Subject: MORE INFROMATION,CALL ME\APPLICATION FOR CLAIMS

Dear Raoul Duke

I want you to know that we have fashioned out a way with which this transaction can be handled with your full co-operation.

However, to be able to carry out this transaction, I attached to you the application for claims which you will fill and submit to the bank by fax or by e-mail :[email protected]

After submitting the application, You will let me know when you get response from the bank.

Furthermore, we agreed that upon receipt of the funds into the bank account that you will nominated for this transaction, you should withhold 20%, 75% for my colleagues and my self, While the remaining 5% is set aside for any expenses that might be incurred in this transaction.

I want you to know that we have worked out modalities on how this transaction would be carried out successfully in the shortest possible time. I am looking forward to consolidating our relationship in the near future. Please I will like to use this same opportunity to re-affirm my pledge for confidentiality, as you know this transaction must be kept secret because of its nature.

You should endeavor to call me upon receipt of this mail for more clarification as the case maybe. My number is 234 1 8028270574.

Best regards and God bless.

Otunba Daniels

# Attachment
APPLICATION_FOR_CLAIMS.doc

Time to establish the tone. The file wasn't actually infected, but everything is the Lad's fault.

From Raoul Duke
Date: Thu, 12 Aug 2004 13:18:59 -0700 (PDT) [22:18]
Subject: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, YOU FILTHY SWINE!!?
To: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, YOU FILTHY SWINE!!?

DON'T YOU EVER DARE SEND ME VIRUSFILES AGAIN YOU CRAZY
FOOL!!!!
WHAT ARE YOU? SOME KIND OF NAZI?

Pull yourself together man! I don't have time for this
kind of shit! If you wanna do business with me, send
me proper documents - without viruses - or fuck off!

Duke

From Otunba Daniels Thu Aug 12 15:06:26 2004
Subject: Re: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, YOU FILTHY SWINE!!?

Dear Brother Raoul Duke ,

Why are talking like this,why for cring out loud will i send virus to your box when you want to help me.

Brother,i dont understand what you are talking about .We dont have to start like this.

The document i sent to you was the APPLICATION FOR CLAIMS ok,nothing like what you think my friend

I will resend it now to your box so you file and send to the bank by attachment.

Waiting to hear from you soon.

Best regards

Mr Dan

From Otunba Daniels Thu Aug 12 15:15:22 2004
Subject: There is no virus attach to this file,it is the APPLICATION FOR CLAIMS.

There is no virus attach to this file,it is the APPLICATION FOR CLAIMS.

# Attachment
APPLICATION_FOR_CLAIMS.doc

From Otunba Daniels Fri Aug 13 04:44:15 2004
Subject: Plz update me!!!

Dear Raould Duke,

How are you today,

Hope you got the attached APPLICATION FOR CLAIMS this time and have you sent it to the bank?Plz update me.

Plz reply me as soon as possible.

Best regards,

Otunda Daniels.

Time for some serious slapping.

Date: Fri, 13 Aug 2004 04:47:52 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: COCKSUCKER. listen up!

Get your lips off your boyfriend's COCK for a minute
and PAY ATTENTION, MAGGOT!

You're lucky I'm in a good mood tonight, ASSHOLE. Some
Singapore Slings with mezcal on the s�de does just
that, puts you in a good mood.

You did it AGAIN, didn't you? You little crazed dope
fiend. You pathetic SYPHILITIC SCUM!

The file you sent was infected by a VIRUS! Luckily I
have invested a small fortune in protective measures
for my company. That pays off when some filthty
HOMOSEXUAL cocksucking WHORE tries to damage my
business.

I have been in touch with my attorney, Dr. Acosta. He
said I would need plenty of legal advice before this
thing is over. And do you know what? I think he is
right.

Pull yourself together man! Fix your computer before
you dare reply to me again. There is a strong
possibility your computer is being infected by strange
and terrible viruses and monitored by forces unknown.
WE CANNOT ACCEPT THIS! Our communication could be
monitored by the entire world! FIX YOUR COMPUTER! I
cannot stress this enough!

Wait, Dr. Acosta just called me! He suggests you
should send the documents by fax! YES!!! The man is a
fuckin' genius! He also suggested we should put the
leeches on you. You should be so lucky I convinced him
that wouldn't be a good idea at the moment.

YES!

You do exactly that! Send the documents by fax! The
number is 206xxxxxx6
Yes! We are in business again! For a moment I thought
your incompetence would fuck up everything!

Make sure you fix your computer before replying to me
again.

Duke

I scared him away!

From Otunba Daniels Fri Aug 13 05:24:31 2004
Subject: Re: COCKSUCKER. listen up!

Dear Raoul Duke,

If you dont want to assit me in this deal,then go away and let me put my mind at rest.I dont understand the kind of person you are cos u are not talkin like someone with good motive in this deal.

I cant start beging you to do what you know is right.If your system can not take the attachment then let`s live it,its ok by me.I can not send the fix for now for security reasons, ok?

You are talking about mood,i cant work with a mooddy person,then listen and listen real good, i`m not a baby,i know what i am sending to you.

Yes!! you will need plenty of advice but from your so called attornry (Dr. Acosta).I`m i not right?

Dan

More slapping!

From Raoul Duke
Date: Fri, 13 Aug 2004 06:09:48 -0700 (PDT) [15:13]
Subject: Re: COCKSUCKER. listen up!

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

I'm trying to HELP you, but as long as you keep
sending me stuff INFECTED by VIRUSES I cannot do
anything. You dont expect me to IGNORE the WARNINGS
and open the document, do you?

Just FAX the goddamned documents, OK!? Is that to hard
to understand? Dont send me any documents infected by
VIRUSES again.

plain, SIMPLE, rules. Knock of your fucking attitude
and get down to business.

And what the fuck are you implying about Dr. Acosta?
EXPLAIN yourself, Are you prejudiced?

I'll have him talk to your superiors at the bank if
you keep causing me trouble.

From Otunba Daniels Fri Aug 13 07:18:15 2004
Subject: Re: COCKSUCKER. listen up!

Dear Raoul Duke,

Ok, kindly resend the fix number to me and i will send to you the documemt.Hope that will be ok by you?

About the Dr,i have noy said anything wronge about him right?

So, let`s do business.

Thanks

Dan.

From Otunba Daniels Sat Aug 14 09:47:51 2004
Subject: Waiting!!!
Dear Raoul Duke,

How are you today?

I`m still waiting for the fix numer plz.

Thanks

Dan

Even more slapping!!

Date: Sat, 14 Aug 2004 14:21:32 -0700 (PDT) [23:25]
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: STUPID MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
To: [email protected]

WHAT!?

RESEND the fax number? RE-SEND it? Have you lost it
ALREADY?

JESUS!! What is this crap? I send the goddamned fax
number and only a couple of HOURS later you send me a
letter asking for it. Are you for real? Are you trying
to make a fool out of me? Who's paying you to waste my
time? My God! There is madness in every direction!!!!

==========================================

DO YOU READ MY MAIL?

NO?

THEN READ THE FUCKING EMAIL I SENT TO YOU!

It's the one with the subject line "COCKSUCKER. listen
up!"

==========================================

I have been in communication with Dr Acosta on how to
handle this. He advice you to take a pen and write the
number on your arm. The man is a genius, and I expect
you to follow his advice.

You may have to stop masturbaiting in order to use the
pen. With the number written on your arm, you won't
forget it on the way to the fax. If you wrote it on a
piece of paper you would probably lose it on the way.
A clue: the fax number is the long row of digits that
start with "2" and ends with "6"

Dr Acosta also wants to know if you were born or if
have you gotten some kind of special training to
achieve this astounding level of amentia? I have no
idea what he means by this, but don't fail to answer
his questions.

Get a grip of yourself, man. You're wasting my time.

I'm seriously starting to doubt if it's worth 900
grand if I have to deal with this level of
incompetence.

Right now I'm in Vegas where I winning big on the
wheels. That's a much easier way to get quick money
than this zwakzinnigheid (to use on of Dr Acosta's
favourite terms).

But I am a forgiving soul, and I realize that you need
my help to get your fair share of the money, And
maybe, just maybe it's worth the hassle for me. I have
decided to give you another chance. I'll probably
regret this, but here is what you need to do right
now, a nice and simple four-step program just for you,
thought out by the esteemed Dr. Acosta. Pay attention
to what that man's advice, son. You could learn a lot.

OK, here is what you need to do:
1. Stop jerking off to internet porn
2. Read the fucking mail
3. Send the goddamned fax to the number I wrote in the
mail.
4. Fix your computer.

OK!?

Now, get to work. I have a poker game waiting for me.

Don't disappoint me. Or Dr. Acosta, he's not as
forgiving as me.

No reply from the lazy bastard!

Date: Mon, 16 Aug 2004 12:40:47 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Otunba, why the FUCK have you let me down?

Otunba! What the FUCK is this?!?! I counted on you!
You LAZY BASTARD!! I just came back from Vegas and
there was NO FAX from you! The joy of winning at poker
faded very quickly when I was met by an empty fax and
and no email from you. WHAT the FUCK is this! I'm
DISAPPOINTED!

However, Dr. Acosta advices that I should send the fax
number again, in case you lost it. The man's a fuckin'
genius, I'd never question anything he says, so here's
the fax number: 206xxxxxx6

Dr Acosta also advice you to never lose critical
information again. Between you and me; he can be very
unforgiving when that happens. Did I mention the
leeches?

Send the goddamn fax and let's do business!

Still no reply, what is this?

Date: Tue, 17 Aug 2004 11:40:55 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Otunba, what the fuck are you doing?
To: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>

Stop this fucking bullshit and send goddamned the fax already!!!

From Otunba Daniels Wed Aug 18 05:41:20 2004
Subject: Re: Otunba, what the fuck are you doing?

Look man,go away live me alone,you don`t sand like someone who is ready 4 business so i dont have time to waste .i need someone cool in this transation.

My co worker said they can`t work with you.

Thanks bye

Dan

Just making sure I get the last word. Wink

Date: Wed, 18 Aug 2004 08:23:02 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Re: Otunba, what the fuck are you doing?

Otunba,
let me tell you something, kid. YOU are not ready for
business. You are nervous like a groundhog surrounded
by coyotes. You behave like a dope fiend who's got the
Shakes.

I can't do business with someone who can't read a
simple mail and who loses the goddamned fax number in
2 hours. 900.000 is not worth it.

Fuck off and leave me alone!

Conclusion: A bit too abusive. But pretty funny. Very Happy

But who knows, he might come crawling back.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2004 7:42 pm

That was so funny. I bet that poor mugu wished he had never heard of you. Wink

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2004 8:43 pm

Hehe, he sounds pretty pathetic.

I will use the Good cop-bad cop routine (bad cop-worse cop?) some more with Raoul Duke and Dr. Acosta. This way I don't have to mess around with two email acocunts.

Baiting Guru Joined: 08 Jul 2004 Posts: 11857 Location: UK

Klassenfeind, that was a pleasure to read mate, I could hear the slaps from here, nice one Laughing

Posted: Sun Aug 22, 2004 4:50 pm

The crazy fool is coming back for more!

Quote:

Dear Raoul Duke,

How are you today?

I ane my co work just finish a meeting and we want to give you a second time in this transation.

I will send you the fax on monday when i get to the office so that you can fill and send to the bank so that we can do these thing once and for all.

Plz let`s cooperate with one another.Thanks in anticipation.

Dan

Me getting a second chance? I think we'll have a word about that...

Edit: New IP address: 216.185.83.158 resolves to Canada!
Original IP - 213.255.211.157 - is in Cameroon.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 04 Mar 2004 Posts: 22

That's fantastic!!

Since he's come crawling back, PLEASE continue! Laughing

Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2004 4:02 pm

It's time to wrap this up, he doesn't want to play anymore.

After the slapping above, he was back for more! The IP of this mail pointed to Canada. Anyway, I didn't answer this mail.

Date: Sat, 21 Aug 2004 10:52:14 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>
Subject: I will send you the fax on monday
To: "Raoul Duke"

Dear Raoul Duke,

How are you today?

I ane my co work just finish a meeting and we want to give you a second time in this transation.

I will send you the fax on monday when i get to the office so that you can fill and send to the bank so that we can do these thing once and for all.

Plz let`s cooperate with one another.Thanks in anticipation.

Dan

Back in Africa according to the IP address. False alarm regarding the IP address above.

Date: Mon, 23 Aug 2004 10:23:20 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>
Subject: I have being trying!!!
To: "Raoul Duke"

Brother Raoul Duke,

How is everything?i have being trying to send the fax but i dont know where the problem is.maybe i will go to the cafe to send it tomorow.

So i will get back to you tomorow.

Thanks

Dan

"Tomorrow" means Tuesday. Of course he didn't send the fax. I'm mr Duke's total lack of surprise.
Time for another slap. And a good slap starts with the subject line.

Date: Wed, 25 Aug 2004 09:14:08 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Otunba, you STUPID COCKSUCKER!
To: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>

Of course you failed to send the fax! How come I'm not
surprised? I have learned by now that you are both
incompetent and untrustworthy. And probably busy
sucking the dicks of hairy men in red woolen shirts
behind the backdoor of some seedy bar.

Don't contact me again unless you actually manage to
send the fax, you inbred imbecile.

He didn't like that. Maybe the refrence to hairy men in red woolen shirts hit a bit close to home? And the default "Dear Duke" is somewhat misplaced.

From: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>
Subject: STOP ALL.
To: "Raoul Duke"

Why do u alwaysDear Duke, act like you're on drugs or something, you better stop all this your stupid and irrelevant talk, when I first met I highly venerated you, thinking you where something that is normal.

Like men I don�t joke with business, if you know you want to do business your self send the fax to the bank or through email attachement.contact the bank your self, I�m ready to provide you with the entire legal document.

I�m not ready to play, if you know you're not ready please stop all the insult because I can be mad sometimes
Otumba

Everything is of course his fault!

Date: Thu, 26 Aug 2004 11:45:54 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: What the FUCK are you saying, you FUCKING SWINE!?
To: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>

Are you threathening me, you little SCUMBAG? You
better be careful with what you're saying.

Why do you keep DELAYING this business, PIGFUCKER? Are
you trying to fool me? Who's paying you to waste my
time?

I'm ready to do business, send the goddamned fax!
Don't fuck with me now, man!

Another slap with an empty message body. After all, the subject line says it all.

Date: Sun, 29 Aug 2004 03:13:33 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Raoul Duke"
Subject: Drop your COCK and send the FAX, Otunba!
To: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>

The little swine gets boring.

Date: Sun, 29 Aug 2004 05:38:37 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Otunba Daniels" <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Drop your COCK
To: "Raoul Duke"

Dear Duke,

I'm sorry i've deleted your fax number from my mail,i dont want to do business with you becuase of your insultive words.

Bye

Dan.O

I never thought he would come back after the initial rounds of slapping. Maybe I should send him a mail in month or so asking him to send the fax.

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