Multi Church Bait.....Ongoing quest for a bit of TW4t

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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 1:34 pm

Tah is a real shame he has not replied. I was really looking to inspire a holy war between the faiths. I did notice how, while he had multiple spelling errors and such, the flow of the emails was better than a lads mastery of the language. I am leaning toward badger also...

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 3:58 pm

In time honoured fashion just as I was going to say bye bye to Jacob Asswell Nonce..this arrived

Quote:

Dear p4stor B4tes
how are you hope ok pastor i want to tell you that am sorry about what happen for not been able to contant you since the last day i wrote you last this is because i have to work manual job to get some money to come to the internet to write you, and as you may know that it is hard herer for me to get money here so i have to do some HARD manual job please dear pastor bates kindly begged in my behalf that i will send you this picture and the application letter by saturday. once again i am sorry and may the peace of the lord be with you hope to hear from you bye:4nslem

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 4:02 pm

J4cob hasn't a clue which church Past0r B4t3s works for! neither do I come to think of it.
So if anyone would like the Pastor to represent the baiter church of their choice let me know.

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 4:07 pm

H4rmond C4mpbell wrote:

From Harmond
To Neil
Date 23 april 2009 17:23
Subj Re: Your induction in TWAT

Hello how are you today hope ok i have try to open the file but i could not so please io will like you to resend it so that i can fill it and get back to you as soon as possible.

Wow.. he's finally realized. Shall I resend the form or will we do this lad the kindness of JPG's too?

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 5:13 pm

To be honest If this lad aint a badger then he is just extremley thick, so if you still have the J-Pegs I would let him have them. Not an act of kindness mind you just to get him to the pyramid stage.

Have you noticed he hasn't actually asked us for anything?

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 5:30 pm

Nope, but it was simply my task to induct him, wasn't it? He indeed didn't ask for anything... Well, I'll send him those JPG's then.

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 5:39 pm

Good man MoP

I wasnt feeling guilty about him I just thought it was unusual LAD behaviour Question

Dont worry he is still going to get the full 5 star treatment Twisted Evil

Do you reckon a TWAT tatoo would be nice?

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 5:49 pm

Yeah, but that should be subtly designed... I was thinking about the symbol for tuna oil that's used in the guide to the final induction ceremony. And then write TWAT in/around that or something.... I might try to think of something sometime..

ETA: Forms have been sent (Coffee-forms haven't been received yet either)

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 7:55 pm

He bores the crap out of me, what fun is there to be had from replies such as this:

Harmond wrote:

Hello Dear Neil Phormi i have printed them so am going to fill it to scan them tomorrow hope to hear from you soon bye

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 7:58 pm

I know lets see how calm he is when he's filling sandbags

He's like watching paint dry Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:06 pm

Pastor bates has asked for a picture for the church council with a special code word on it.

he has promised he will get it too me by saturday

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:01 pm

God be praised these lads have no moral fibre or a shred of comittment

Me

Quote:

Dear Anslem

I'm glad to hear back from you,

Ive spoken to the church council and explained that you were working hard to pay for the Internet fees so that you could send us your pictures and details.

They have agreed to review your case at next Wednesday's meeting. So be sure and get all your information to me before the weekend and also if you would scan any receipts of your expenses and send them too, we will re-imburse you upon your full ordination.

Kindest Regards

Lad

Quote:

Hello dear pastor Bates how are you? today hope ok i will like to thank you for your kind gesture of appologising on my behalf to the entire church for God will bless you in jesus name i have taking the picture and i am looking for a little amount of money to scan the picture to you but i have not gotten it the last Job i did the man has not paid me he ask me to come and collect the money tomorrow so i will send the picture as soon as i collect the money from the man.Pastor i must thank you for your effort that you have put in to help a poor ophane like me, may the almight Lord reward you in jesus name Amen.bye for now

Dont worry jacob you will pay us back Twisted Evil

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 9:14 pm

That chemical abuseme has left it's marks... you're an evil, evil man (in a good way)

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 9:38 pm

Neil wrote:

Dear ,

May the Lord's blessing lay upon you.

I have still haven't received the forms from you, even though you promised to get them to me by April 24th, please get them to me as soon as possible. I hope you understand that there's no possibility of becoming a standing member unless I receive the forms. Please make haste.

I feel God's love gently throbbing through my love vein, as it will through yours once you're in the TWAT

Yours Faithfully,
<siggysnip>

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:02 pm

Harmond wrote:

hello Rev how are you i have printed the form but i was not able to print no 3 and no 11 of the for m now i do not have any money to print it any more and the more to scan it i do not have please can you send me $50 so that i can do everything once and for all hope to hear from you soon bye

Well.. erm... I think.. eh.. I can answer that... ehm.. with.. a... ehm... 'No!'

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:40 pm

He He I hope you TWATslapped him Laughing

I,ve also sent wake up call to the other A.R.S.E.S happily to coincide with this afternoons ASEM Laughing

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:43 pm

Ewl! Not yet, will do soon.

Siggymaterial from totally unrelated (other) TWAT lad:

Lad wrote:

thanks for your mail.the content is well understood.i will like to join the TWATTOWER as well.what are the requirement to join pls do and let me know how to proceed

TWATTOWER? Sounds kama sutra like, doesn't it?

ETA: Replied this to the lad:

Neil wrote:

May the Lord's blessing lay upon you!

I hope you do understand that our rulers don't allow us to send money to non-members. I believe this has been explained to you? Anyone who sends money to a non-member shall receive a severe TWAT spanking by those who are tasked with handling the rulers, and I can assure you that it is something that none like to experience.

Please find a way to scan the forms and remember that we will reimburse any costs you've had to make when you've become a standing member in the TWAT.

Yours SIncerely

TWAT Spanking? Ouch!

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 7:55 pm

Well this has been hard work getting these Lazy Lads to do anything.
So without much ado let me present
Anselem TW4T A.R.S.E

What a shocking effort

Hall of Shame effort or not?

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 8:00 pm

Wow photochopping 1970s style.

That is definite Hall of Shame material.

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 11:22 pm

A slippery slope whatever next photo chop pyramids sacrilege

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 11:32 pm

removed duplicate

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 11:32 pm

Yes Gentlemen It is most disgraceful hardly befitting a Lad who wants to become a man of God.

A nice friendly slap is on its way.

I wonder how he could afford the tippex as he is so poor?

@B8er

Have you had any joy with this Lazy Git?

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 26 Aug 2006 Posts: 577

Looks like a spider caught him

Posted: Thu Apr 30, 2009 5:30 am

@Badger, No haven't heard from him since I sent my application forms for completion. My Rev sent him a reminder at the weekend.

Looks like he can only handle one church at a time.

Posted: Thu Apr 30, 2009 5:35 am

Did he seriously put white-out all over his own photograph? Confused

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