The Spooner’s Extra Marital Lad Affairs -some NSFW content

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Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 1:49 pm

Hi Boss

If I'm having to deal with shit like these I need a 'Bonus' from Tiffany. Twisted Evil

Of course I always reply to letters with due deference.

Quote:

Under no circumstances will I be sending you scans of my employer's passport. He was asked to attend this conference by a young lady of dubious provenance, and expects you to treat his person with the respect he deserves.
The onlyt information I am prepared to provide is his name and business address, any further communication should employ the use of lower case letters, and a more moderate tone.
I remain yours faithfully
Libby Queen
P.S. A man in your position should employ an intelligent secretary.

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 1:54 pm

C&P your POEM

think it could use a second outing to Nigeria,

or even 2!

can't let good mush go to waste. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 2:35 pm

Loved your reply to the secretariat DW, that was beautiful

I may need to suggest that your service must be appropriate as she has not commented or complained Wink

As to the poem getting recycled, no doubt it will be, I didn't write it for the enjoyment of just one lad, in fact, I offer for any others who may want to steal anything I post for their own pets, the more lads who use it the merrier

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 7:02 pm

Climb down about your passport! Score 1 to QUEEN LIBBY Vlad 0

Dear participant,
Send his data informations to the conference secretariat immediately such as :
(1) His name and full address
(2) Country of origin and residence
(3) Marital status
(4) Phone number
Yours faithfully,
Dr Clifford Hayes
Secretary

still not sorted the caps lock

how would sir like me to reply

1 Sebastian Sweet Cakes 3rd
2 Outer Mongolia
3 Satisfied
4 Whitehall 1212 now do you have lad's phone number?

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 9:50 pm

Tell him that I have gone mad at you for upsetting teh poor lad and now I need to get to teh bottom of it perfor continueing

Of course, you will be deeply hurt at your professionalism being in question and need the lad to apologise for dobbing before you help him any further

Or feel free to try one of your own ideas

I love what you have done so far

Are you sure your new to baiting, you are very good at it and promise to get much better

I almost feel sorry for the lads who fall into your trap

Not much but Laughing

Now, where's that darling wife of mine Confused

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:14 pm

Quote:

I almost feel sorry for the lads who fall into your trap

Got one who doesn't want out! Even I raised my eyebrows at he the lates IM so sexy!

I think the ladette's pimp has learned his lesson. Don't f--k with Queen Libby.

Think I can find a lad's number, sorta Ghana way or the same lad's orange phone!

Posted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:17 pm

BTW your wife my be getting a brilliant email from Jim!

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:14 am

I will be looking forward to it Laughing

James White is one the most suspicious lads yo uwill meet, I have had a few attempts at baiting him and either I have lost interst or he has, but what I do know is that he quickly wants to see that you are real and wants you to ring him or to chat.

As both of those are out for this bait we will need to find some good excuses to get around it and hope for the best.

The good news here is that previous baiters have done chat and made calls and thay didn't work out either so he will know that even jokers can call or chat

The script has been thrown away for now

He just wants to know we are real

James wants his questions answered

Quote:

...................and can you please tell me about your family,what business you are into specifically,your bros and sis..parents,growing up,likes and hates,what you want in a relationship,about your last relationship..can you also please send me your phone number..

james

Nothing like saying hello and goodbye is there

Can you imagine him treating a real vic like this Wink

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:56 am

Quote:

.and can you please tell me about your family,what business you are into specifically,your bros and sis..parents,growing up,likes and hates,what you want in a relationship,about your last relationship..can you also please send me your phone number..

Let me think on this, dealers in precious metals, stones and art. (Stolen but won't say that)

My role - entertaining buyers and compeing the deals.

Likes and hates - can so do that - relationship NSFW

phone number.. the one that's always switched off?

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:37 am

Your secretary has at last decided where you might live, but the subtlties of the address will be lost on the ignorant Vlad.

Quote:

Now that you are behaving in a more reasonable manner I can reveal the information requested.

(1) His name and full address
Sir Sebastian SweetCakes 3rd
'Yurtattila'
Black Gold Avenue
Erenhot
Inner Mongolia

(2)Country of Origin South Africa. Residence as above part of the year.

(3) Marital status - satisfied

(4) Phone number 076240106677/+233271313117

I requested information from you concernig suitable hotels, and await the courtesy of a reply to this important matter.
Libby Queen.

If he rings those numbers and gets an answer! What fun!

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 9:17 am

Another flying visit.

Quote:

He just wants to know we are real

James wants his questions answered

Maybe I can send him a stool sample, be worth it to see the look on the lads faeces.

Laughing

Apologies for old joke and glad thread going so well in my absence, I just knew I had virtualy married the right guy.

@ Fantastique DQ - Reality is often stranger than even lad fantasy or mangled words see;

http://www3.interscience.wiley.com/journal/119463026/abstract

Wink

@ Sensational DW - I have put your name forward for Chair of "Board of Directors."

Wink

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 11:08 am

Darling wife, of course you virtually married the right man Wink

I am just glad we are virtually loaded and that money is no object, there is only one person I know of who spends more than you Cool

It seems I am going to have to check my dodgy facts out better in the future Embarassed

Quote:

Plasma membrane proton pump inhibition and stalk cell differentiation in Dictyostelium discoideum

Good thing the lads will be just as confused as me if they do happen to read that Laughing

Nice work DW
You truly do deserve a raise Wink

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:16 pm

So games is it?

Conference Secretariat
26 AVE ,PLOT 5
EAST END
P.O.BOX 6224
LONDON.
FAX..+4426734419
TEL ; +44703 182 8579
: +44703 183 5756
Dear invited Participant,
The scientific programme of this conference on HIV Pathogenesis and treatment aims to provide new insight into HIV disease development, prevention and care that can lead to new research direction,help advance translational research and move theoretic advances into clinical practice and prevention programs.
The program committe is dedicated to ensuring that the content of this conference will be relevant to today's question including addressing the challenges of expanding treatment in resource limited settings.The conference is extended to only invited delegates.Participant can only be accepted under recommendation since the conference is not under advertisement and it is not opened for all,but since your recommendation came from one of our staff, opportunity will be given to you to participate and contribute your experience on the issue of HIV & AIDS.The forth coming Aids Conference is scheduled to take place from the 20TH - 26TH JUNE,2009 here in the UK at 24 convention Hall, 6425 Barden,
London,UK.This year conference is being organised by private aids organisation in the UK and being sponsored by different independent donors.The conference is dedicated to all victims of AIDS and those suffering from the HIV & AIDS virus.Every body is entitled to Participate in the forth coming Conferences regardless of your Religion or belief.The independent Donors and the Sponsors will take care of your entire flight tickets,while you have to take care of your accomodation throughout your stay here in United Kingdom.We will open your participation file immediately as we have recieved your required informations that we needed.Forward to our Secretariat a copy of your hotel reservation booking receipt for confirmation on or before 1ST MAY,
2009.Your Hotel reservation confirmation will only prove to the United Kingdom Bureau of Immigrant Affairs that you are capable to take care of yourself here in the UK and you will not be a liability to the UK government during and after the forth coming conference.You are expected to be here in London on the 19Th of JUNE,2009 before the starting of the programme and the programme will run for 7 days.I will give you more directive as soon as we receive your hotel reservation receipt confirmation.
Please note that we are not the UK Authority authorising your visas but we are working with dates directives from the UK Bureau of Immigrant Affairs,the authority that is in charge of authorisation of group visas and single visa.We cannot add or reduce any given requirements for the authorization of participants visas participating in this events.And as such all requirements must be met by participants requiring the UK Visa assistance.[cMale and female delegates are welcome.The UK Bureau of immigrant Affairs have asked all participants requiring the UK visas for this events,to make their hotel reservation before Visa will be issued to them.This will convince the UK Bureau of Immigrant Affairs that all participants attending the UK conference will not be a liability to the UK government during and after the conference here in the UK.Without your accommodation the UK Bureau of Immigrant Affairs will not authorise your visas.You must try all
possibilities to book for your hotel rooms and get the confirmation to be forwarded to the Conference Secretariat.Contact the management of the below selected hotels for the room reservation immediately .

NAMES OF HOTELS AND THEIR CONTACT ADDRESSES

HOTEL MILESTONE
1,Kensington court,
London.
Email ; [email protected]

BEAUFORT HOTEL
33 Beaufort gardens,
London.
Email ; [email protected]

Point to note; When you make your reservation in any of these hotels,you should ask for Receipt as you will need to forward the receipt confirmation to the Conference Secretariat via E-mail for the processings of your documents.
Applicant should submit their delegates hotel reservation booking confirmation as soon as possible.The official deadline for the submition of hotel reservation booking confirmation is on before 1ST MAY,
2009.
Thanks,
Yours faithfully.
Dr.Clifford Hayes
Secretary

a good try BUT you are dealing with a 'Mistress of This Game'

now where did the rest of this come from?

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Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:53 pm

Secretaries deserve a raise or suitable bonus. Easter Egg from Faberge?

Quote:

Dear Sir

Sir Sebastian will not be requiring hotel accommodations, since he and his party will not be staying with his old friend Lord Francis Dashwood of West Wycombe.

Also you need not rouble your self about visas, all members of our party hold dual nationality and therfore British Passports.

You are merely required to reserve a places for Sir Sebastian SweetCakes, Lady Barbara Villiers SweetCakes and myself.

Please confirm our reservations at your earliest convenience.

Libby Queen

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 1:15 pm

Oh, this should be fun Laughing

Cant wait for his reply to that

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

Excellent work still going on here I see! Very Happy

It looks like D_W is turning out to be a wonderful secretary to our darling Sweetcakes. Nothing like throwing a monkey wrench into the thought out plans of a lad. Wink

To the bestest and dearest Sweetcakes, I do so much thank you for mentioning my newest todger additions to the forum.
I hope they brought glee and evil delight to all who viewed them. Twisted Evil

All I can say to the fabtabulous, spankaflourous, and spendtubulous Kate is I do hope the stalk cell can be made target specific and that soon there will be a plasma membrane inhibitor that will help it in the pathway to its desired destination.

DIF is controlled by the pH of intracellular vesicles rather than by intracellular pH itself. I hope the model can help in showing the difference and can aid in the progress of the stalk cell and its admirable and noble cause.
( That hurt my head a little bit. Did I understand that right? )

Best Secretary wrote:

You are merely required to reserve a places for Sir Sebastian SweetCakes, Lady Barbara Villiers SweetCakes and myself.

Please confirm our reservations at your earliest convenience.

I too look so forward to the response to that. Laughing

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:59 pm

^^^I too look forward to a response to that. Very Happy

Great job on everyone's part and it's going to get crazy. clapping

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 3:49 pm

Always happy to pimp the talent of a Todger Club member DQ

Now, if only I could find my wife, she was there a moment ago Cool

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

^^^You still burning your candle tonight?

She is playing peek a boo with you or hide and seek rather... Wink

She showed me what she is almost wearing, You are very very lucky...

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 4:25 pm

I am DQ
I did find her too
Candle very much lit and off to my bed now Wink

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:23 pm

Your secretary has been challenged, but has I think been direct in her response!

Rolling Eyes

Quote:

Dear Sir

Lord Francis Dashwood vouches for the bone fides of, his guests and friend, Sir Sebastian and his party. I do not think any British Bureau will question his authority.

By all means ask them, if you wish to be investigated by the Home Office and MI6.

Libby Queen

Do yuom have ant=y instructions?

Posted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 7:52 pm

DW - you are doing a brilliant job. Private secretaries are very much a law unto themselves.

Lady Barbara Villiers SweetCakes gets her chambermaid to post this reply;

Quote:

What a truly ghastly and vulgar oik this lad is, so glad you are handling this situation with your usual and effective steely determination.

@ DQ - You exhibit a sublime understanding of cellularization, maybe I should post more of my homework more often?

http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/summary?doi=10.1.1.53.360

There is always the possibility that I am BS-ing and merely baiting the baiters.

Shocked

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:31 am

The Chamber maid mentioned she posted on your behalf while she was...

Well, she mentioned somewhere Wink

I have just slipped back into Sweety's box to reply to James

Sweety wants to take things slow with James

Quote:

Hi James

I love a man who knows what he wants

I will tell all about those things in time, first I want to know all about you, you want to know everthinks about me in the first email, we have lots of time to get to know each other

Fond Regards
SweetCheeks

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 9:07 am

A few things to report for now

First

James copy and pastes his life story for Sweety
Well, he hasn't gone to any trouble, good to know he hasn't changed his script since posting at SW too Wink

Quote:

let me tell you about my self;i am the only kid of my parents......,my dad died when i was 7 years old,my mom is still alive...i love to write poetry as you might have noticed.my growing up was kind of lonely...now i am looking for a serious relationship,my wife died 8 years ago...she was 5 months pregnant carrying my second kid,i lost her and the pregnacy...my only kid now is 13 years of age.i love to dance,i play basket ball and i love to travel.

james

I was already aware of the daughter but he has changed the name of his daughter since last I knew so I am interested in finding out the new addy he uses to post at SW, lets see if I can write to his daughter as well

Sweety tells about herself and want to talk to the daughter

Quote:

Hi James

So much sorry has been in your life, that is just so sad, a little girl needs a mother in her life, would you mind if I get to know her?
Your wife dying during pregnancy, it happens more often that you know and it is so sad, especially when it leave a young child without a mother, well, the good news is that I am nice and healthy and prmise not to die on you.

You love to dance and play basket ball and love poetry, well, that is a coincidence, I am noit much into basketball, I dont really know the rules but you could teach me, do you have a favourite team? and poetry, I just loved that poem you wrote to me, I know I am being forward here but do you have any more, you can always write poetry to me, I just love it.

You will know from my earlier email that I love poetry too but it takes me such a long time to write, I bet you could put something togetehr so much more quickly

Well, I will tell you just a little bit about myself, I am about 40 years old, blonde hair, most people think I am attractive which is nice, I do try to look good at all times, I am also the half owner of a successful business and run the UK branch, I am a little shy and dont like to reveal too much about myself, I rather take things a little more slowly until we get to know each other a little bit better so excuse me if I dont answer all of your questions, I will never lie to you but sometimes I may not want to tell you everything, it could be harmful to my business if the wrong people find out what I am doing so I do need to make sure I am comfortable with that too

Anyway, you have heard enough about me for now, please ask me anything you like and I wil lanswer if I can

Do take care sweet poetic man

Kind regards
SweetCheeks

It can be a huge advantage to know your pet and know how their script goes, by knowing this you can speed them up or slow them down as you desire, in this case I would rather speed it up so I have gone straight to teh daughter, it isn't supposed to be introduced for a week or so yet, but why wait, we run this bait, not the lad

In other news, a vic at Scamwarners has been targeted bu this lad, in a bid to help her to see the truth I have sent him a standard first up ASEM

SweetCakes slipped on his charm to ASEM Steven

Yep, lets see where this goes, all I really wanted was his IP but while I have him replying there is no harm in grabbing some script as well

Quote:

Hi Steve

Thank you so much for contacting me

I would love to get to know you better

Please tell me more about yourself

Regards
SweetCheeks

Well, yes, it was sent as Sweety from Cakes box, A mistake on my part that will most likely be over looked

Steven replies to Murray, now this may get interesting Embarassed

Quote:

Hello Murray ,

How are you doing today ? well i got your message and i felt i write you to tell you abit about myself ..so hope you like these few things about me ...

I am a sensitive, caring and open-minded and Christian man who spends his life helping others as i involve in my daily activities and very emotional. I am the owner of a successful and growing practice

I am interested in finding a woman who will be my best friend, companion, lover and soul-mate. I am looking for a relationship which will be stable and secure, characterized by intimacy and trust, and that will last for the rest of my life. At the same time, I want to move slowly with any one I may meet so that we have time to get to know each other and build a firm foundation for a relationship.

I have a great sense of humor and love to get engaged in interesting conversations. My hobbies and interests are many and varied. The following are some of my interests:

Music: I am most passionate about Classical Music, but also like Blues, Classic Rock, Folk, Jazz, and international music, such as Celtic Music and Russian Rock

Films: Action/Adventure, Comedy, Documentary, Drama, Foreign Films, Musical, Mystery, Romance, Suspense/Thriller, Westerns—for example, I am always ready to watch a comedy like Spaceballs, Young Frankenstein, Blazing Saddles, Airplane, a crime mystery like the recent film Fractured (with Anthony Hopkins), or an adventure film like The Lord of the Rings series

Outdoor Activities: I love nature. In order to lose weight, get in shape and be a healthy person I have built regular walking and exercise into my schedule. I also like photography (I have professional grade equipment and take professional quality shots), bicycling, camping, hiking, fishing, horseback riding, sailing, snorkeling; traveling (I have been to Europe several times, the Holy Land, Egypt and most of the United States, including Alaska, the Arizona Desert and Florida—which is likely my favorite place to vacation), target shooting and hunting

Indoor Activities: art, collecting antiques, computers, cooking, crafts like jewelry making (by soldering and casting precious metals and setting semiprecious and precious jewels) and leather work, museums, movies, concerts, opera, theater, politics (I am conservative), reading (non-fiction on religion, psychology and history, as well as historical novels and classic literature) and dining out

Favorite Foods: International of almost all forms, especially Chinese, Italian, Greek, Indian, etc.

If you are interested in speaking more with me please respond to my email. Thank you.

Sincerely

Steven Blair

So many wonderful things in there to de-educate about

Posted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 3:00 pm

Sandra's llitle friend is beginning to annoy me.

Quote:

HivAids Conference to me

Dear participant,
The conference secretariat hereby confirm the Place you wish to stay for the forth coming conference that will start from the 20Th and ends on the 26Th of JUNE,2009 at 24 convention Hall, 6425 Barden,London, UK.This conference like you where being told is organized to enlighten people of the world about the dreaded disease called HIV/AIDS that is gradually eating deep around the globe today.Also to enlighten people more on how to prevent the dreaded disease.You have also been given the chance to deliver a short sermon on the day the conference will take off.Many people mostly in the third world countries are seriously endangered by the dreaded disease that was why the organizers came together to organize this conference.
The conference of the past years has improved the life of the people tremendously and that was why it was organized this year.The conference is opened to for invited delegates only and it is strickly on recommendation.The British Bureau of Immigrant Affairs that is responsible for the security of all the invited participants has instructed that any of the invited participant must pay the sum of 3,500 Pounds ( THREE THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS ) which is REFUNDABLE to the participants at the end of the conference here in London.The British Bureau of Immigrant Affairs further explained that this is done in other to make sure that every invited participants can be able to take care of themselves after the conference and will not be a liability to the British Government.Remember that if you did not pay the REFUNDABLE sum of 3,500 Pounds ( THREE THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS ) you will not be allowed into the venue of the conference.The closing date for the payment of the REFUNDABLE sum of 3,500 Pounds will be on the 4Th of May,2009.
Comply immediately so that your attendance to the conference will not be cancelled.
Yours faithfully,
Dr.Clifford Hayes
Secretary

Oh dear Sir Percival will not be pleased, and his good friend may get creative.

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