Oh crap, now the feds are involved...

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Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 1:50 pm

After trying to get money for a claim from me, my lad has finally snapped and got the FBI involved. I got this email from them today...

Quote:

ATTENTION: Aaron Barschak,

YOUR REPORT WAS BROUGHT TO US THIS MORNING FROM DIRECTOR TELEX AND SCREENING FOREIGN OPERATION AND REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT ALPHA MICRO FINANCE SERVICE, THAT THEY DISCOVERED YOUR FUND WHICH WAS WRITTEN ON YOUR NAME BY BARCLARYS BANK, UK, AND YOU WERE TOLD THAT YOU NEEDED TO PRESENT YOUR AFFIDAVIT OF CLAIM FOR THE RELEASE OF YOUR FUND WHICH YOU REFUSED. SINCE YOU HAVE FAILED TO ABIDE BY THE RULE AND REGULATION GUIDING THIS BANK, YOU WILL BE INTIMATED TO FACE YOUR CHARGE WHICH WILL BE 3 YEARS JAIL SENTENCE FOR YOUR FAILURE TO PROVIDE THIS AFFIDAVIT FOR CLAIM THROUGH THE INSTRUCTION GIVEN.

NOW FOR YOUR INFORMATION, YOU ARE REQUESTED TO PRESENT WITHIN 4 WORKING DAYS WITH IMMEDIATE EFFECT. FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH THE RULE OF THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION THEN NOTE THAT WE ARE GOING TO SEND OUR UNITED STATE DELEGATE TO YOU FOR IMMEDIATE ARREST TO FACE YOUR CHARGE.

YOU HAVE ONLY 4 WORKING DAYS TO FORWARD THIS TO THE DIRECTOR TELEX AND SCREENING FOREIGN OPERATION AND REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT ALPHA MICRO FINANCE SERVICE. GET BACK TO US WITH IMMEDIATE EFFECT WITH THE AFFIDAVIT FOR CLAIM.

WE AWAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU BEFORE TAKING THE NEXT STEP OF ACTION.

YOURS IN SERVICE

FBI DIRECTOR Robert Mueller III

Im a bit confused....my character lives in Canada, my lad in England, and the dead client was from Togo. Even the bank its going through is based in Britain, so I dont know why the Americans have become involved! Laughing

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 1:54 pm

^^^ maybe interpol called them in? Wink

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

We're involved in everything. I like how the FBI has a "UNITED STATES DELEGATE". At least he is polite and signs off "Yours in Service" -- imagine how he'd sign off if he was really pissed. Wink

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 2:07 pm

I love it when the lads resort to this.

I'd fire back a letter to "Director Mueller" and inform him that you are very sorry that he got dragged into this, and that you'll file that claim right away since you don't want any trouble with him or the FBI.

Then find a way to miss the deadline.

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 2:08 pm

You'll find it's a British Interpol thing Lagos Scotland Yard always calls in the FBI in the spirit of sharing information on people who default on a single bank payment. LloydsTSB did the same to me when I missed a payment.

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 2:30 pm

The deadline has already been missed...I got that email a week ago, but I was busy sunning myself in Spain so I didnt reply Laughing

Im sure I can come to a reasonable arrangement with the FBI to get this whole mess sorted Wink

419Eater is my life Joined: 25 Feb 2009 Posts: 299

Ah, the great Barclarys bank. Laughing

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 3:33 pm

Tell him as long as the FBI don't inform the Stasi about you, you aren't that bothered. Wink

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 6:07 pm

Just got a reply to my queries as to what exactly I was being charged with...

Quote:

ATTENTION: AARON BARSCHAK,

YOU MIGHT HAVE NOT INVOLVE IN ANY CRIMINAL ACT BUT UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR REPORT WAS BROUGHT TO US FROM ALPHA MICRO FINANCE SERVICE IN UK FOR INVESTIGATION OVER AN OUTSTANDING FUND OF 4.6 MILLION POUNDS.

THEY SAID INSTRUCTION HAVE BEEN GIVEN TO YOU TO FORWARD YOUR AFFIDVAIT OF CLAIM IN YOUR NAME FOR THE RELEASE OF THIS FUND BUT ONCE YOU HEARD THIS YOU FAIL TO PRODUCE THE AFFIDVAIT FOR CLAIM OF FUND IN YOUR NAME.INSTRUCTION HAS BEEN GIVEN TO INVESTIGATE WHY YOU FAIL TO COME UP WITH THIS CERTIFICATE.

REMEMBER YOU HAVE A DEAL WITH ALPHA MICRO FINANCE SERVICE IN UK FOR THE CLAIM OF YOUR BROTHER FUND LATE MR.MIKE BARSCHAK,SINCE THE FINANCE SERVICE HAVE WAITED SEVERAL DAYS WITHOUT YOUR REPLY WITH THE AFFIDVAIT FOR CLAIM FOR THE RELEASE OF THIS FUND TO YOU,THEY NOW FORWARD YOUR MATTER TO US FOR INVESTIGATION IF YOU ARE NOT TRYING TO COLLECT ANOTHER PERSON FUND.

MR.BARSCHAK WE WOULD ADVISE YOU TO GET BACK TO US WITH DETAILS BEFORE THE DETECTIVE MOVE INTO ACTION.

WE AWAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU BEFORE TAKING THE NEXT STEP OF ACTION..

YOURS IN SERVICE

FBI DIRECTOR Robert Mueller III

I've simply replied...

Quote:

Hankus Pankus, Brother Muller,
So, if I havent been involved in any criminal act, how could you threaten to put me in prison for 3 years?!

Regards,

Brother Aaron Barschak

Next email will be a slap. Ive already started warming up the ol' insult ray!

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 6:14 pm

^^^^ Lad-logic.

They think of the scariest thing their wee little minds can conjure up (the FBI or EFCC) and think that you MUST be terrified of them as well.

Isn't it normal for any kind of lottery to have the FBI arrest it's winners because they forgot to claim their winnings. Laughing

train boi Joined: 04 Nov 2008 Posts: 697

manbiteslion wrote:

You'll find it's a British Interpol thing Lagos Scotland Yard always calls in the FBI in the spirit of sharing information on people who default on a single bank payment. LloydsTSB did the same to me when I missed a payment.

I had the indians after me when I was ONE day late with my credit card, They threatend my dad with the Russian police for 5p

Why would Barclays get the FBI involved? I would have thought any Indian collections department would have been more suitable

Posted: Thu Apr 23, 2009 9:44 pm

With the FBI it's been Bob Mueller all the way (recently even sharing his thoughts on Marine comradeship) except once, where it was an Agent J0seph B1lly P3rsichini.

Quote:

Fellowing the petition recieved from Barrister Williams from London,Over diverssion of funds we are contacting you based on the information and documents tendered to us. We have done our verification on our FBI Identification Record with our Social Security codes,i would like to hear from you for justification as we will resolve this matter as soon as we recieve your reply starting your own side of the matter.
Be informed that the FBI will not fail to arrest you if we did not hear from you withine 48hrs since we have all your data as tendered by the complainant.

Next day...

Quote:

After our investigation, We were able to establish the fact behind the entire transaction. It is obvious that the amount as mentioned was due for transfer into you. We were also able to discover that those people who were parading themselves as the genuine people are all impsotors. In view of this, you are advice to stop any further transaction or conversation with them we have record of every mail and conversation earlier held between you and the impostors. Your inheritance which you are legally entitiled to could not be transfer to you because you fail to provide both ANTI-DRUG CERTIFICATE and ANTI-TERRORIST CERTIFICATE. Without this two documents, it will be difficult if not near impossible to transfer such amount of money. The attorney that actually reported the case is atually BARRISTER P1US NW4IGWE and not Barrister williams.Now that we have step into this, you should not bother about all this as all you should do is stated therein. These measure came into existence after the terrorist attack in USA. The implication of this is that failure to provide this will not only attract arrest, you also risk being jailed for 15years without option of fine. Your immediate assignment now is to procure those documents and forward it to us so that your fund will be given a clean bill of health.

15 years?! Those Feds are nasty when you're missing some paperwork!

419Eater is my life Joined: 27 Jan 2009 Posts: 479

Gaz wrote:

Im a bit confused....my character lives in Canada, my lad in England, and the dead client was from Togo. Even the bank its going through is based in Britain, so I dont know why the Americans have become involved! Laughing

Haven't you heard? US law applies everywhere! .. even where it doesn't!!
http://techmeme.com/090417/p10

/me

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 1:55 pm

^^ that is actually correct - usa law can be applied to any crime if the internet traffic that passes through a us node.

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 2:17 pm

I'll see your FBI and raise you a US and Nigeria Embassy

Quote:

Good day

From the Chairman of the US Embassy and the Nigeria Embassy...there is a report from the Nigeria EFCC and the FBI that you 3thel D1ckstuffer (Ms) have been insaulting Mr Lawson Brown...

The question is do you know you can be arrested for insaulting this Him, if you want to apply for a loan Nevada you should learn to confirm the country the person his before asking for a loan, you told him that you need a loan and at the same time you were telling him to provide his licence of lender which he did, and at the same time you have the impatues to report him to the F3deral Lending B0ard who do you think the are the federal lending board who are incharge of everything..

Now I will advice you to write back to Mr Lawson Brown and Apologize to him because his a well know man in the country he doesn't like all this nonsense you are doing, I have personally contacted the F3deral Lending B0ard and ask them to get hold of your address and get you arrested anything you do anything funny...

You better be care in the state of Nevada because anything can happen to you if you dont care time...

If you have any problem with them kindly get back to us so that we can assist you to get your fund transfered to you,okay...

Strangely, the FLB haven't heard from the embassy yet.

Of course, being a compliant citizen of the USA I immediately wrote back to Mr Lawson Brown and apologised. Here is my apology

Quote:

You are a little boy who fucks goats

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 2:44 pm

And now the EFCC are getting in on the act

Quote:

A report came to us from the office of the Us Embassy and the Nigeria Embassy and also from Federal lending Board that you have been asking for liscence of lender from Mr Lawson Brown but it was not shown to you...

One thing I want you to know is that Mr Lawson is well know loan right here in Nigeria and in USA, his firm was estiblish in the year 1995 and was approved by the Government of Nigeria and the EFCC worldwide, so I want to know why you want to spoil is name for nothing, simply because you applied for a loan is firm...

All the message you have sent to him for insaulting him and for accussing him have been forwarded to our table for investigation, the Federal Lending Board know that Mr Lawson Brown loan firm was approved as a loan lender right from the year 1995...

Any way if you need more information about him kindly get back to us...

DO AS I HAVE INSTRUCTED YOU TO DO.

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 2:54 pm

Damn B8er, I'd like to know what kind of insault you can send that gets the attention of every law enforcement organization in the world! Laughing

On a serious note, it's sad to think there might be real victims who fall for this crap. Are there?

Posted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 2:58 pm

^^^ All I did was ask him if he was licenced to lend money in Nevada and then reported him to the 'F3deral Lending B0ard' for unlicenced money lending.

I think the last straw was when the FLB wrote to him and advised him that he was being blacklisted.

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