I can has mugu?

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Posted: Fri Feb 20, 2009 11:55 pm

I'm relieved that you don't mind my shamelessly stealing your modality. Several lolcat baits have now been launched. I'll post any lol-worthy replies.

Posted: Fri Feb 20, 2009 11:57 pm

it's official, i just had a little bit of wee, Cachuma-style

Quote:

for baby wot are the hungry and ded and stuff.

that bit, right there Wink

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 12:08 am

^^^ Yeah, that line got me gud. Laughing

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 12:14 am

This is a great modality. I'm stealing it as well. Laughing

I can haz trunkbox?

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 1:38 am

I'm too lazy to do entire lolcat emails, but I'll surely start signing off with Kthxbai. Very Happy

kthxbai,
bohigal

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 2:31 am

^^^It's actually quite easy! Just go here:

http://speaklolcat.com/

Here's my first few emails out to lads:

For a lotto lad:

Quote:

DEAR MR YAP,

DID I RILY WIN? THIZ AR TEH MOST EXCITIN THINS THATZ EVERY HAPPENED TO ME! IM VERY COOL CAT, BUT THIZ HAZ ME SHAKINS MUH TAIL FOR SHUR. PLEEZ TELL ME WHUT I NEED T DO NEXT, BECAUSE I AM LITTLE CONFUSED. DO I SENT MUH INFURMASHUN T YOUZ OR T SOMEONE ELSE? MAH ENGLISH AR NOT ALWAYZ VERY GOED. KTHX.

MUH NAME AR HESTER D'MOLLESTER. THIZ AR VERY WONDERFUL! FANK U SO MUCH!

For a Scam Victim Reimbursement Committee lad:

Quote:

PLZ HALP ME. I HAS BEEN VICTIM OV SCAM FRUM MAN HOO SED HE LOVEZ ME BUT TOOK ALL MAH MONEY INSTEAD. I WUZ VRY UPSET EVEN THOUGH IM USUALLY PRITEE KEWL KAT BUT DIS HURT ME BADLY. I WUZ GOIN 2 COME 2 AFRICA 2 MEET HIM BUT AFTR I SENT HIM $5000 HE STOPPD WRITIN 2 ME. CAN U HALP GIT MAH MONEY BAK 2 ME? WUT IZ I SUPPOSD 2 DO NEXT?

For a Gold Dealer lad:

Quote:

Y halo thar i wud liek 2 werk wif u on dis. Im sorry mah english iz not vry gud but im gud busineswoman an wif teh economy in such bad condishun im lookin 4 bettr ways 2 invest mah money. Im vry honest an trustworthy an will not let u down. I has money 2 invest an gold iz vry gud investment nao. Plz tell me wut needz 2 do next. Mah full addres iz below. Thank u!

And my favorite so far: an ESL Teacher job application:

Quote:

Y halo thar. Im interestd in applyin 4 posishun teachin esl. I saw ur advertisement 4 job an wish 2 apply. Plz tell me wut needz 2 do 2 apply 4 job as an esl teachr. Im vry gud teachr an has taught lotz da tiems in da past. Plz considr hirin me as jobs r vry hard 2 find thees dais.

Thank u vry mutch!

This is loads of fun! I just hope I get a few nibbles back...or should I say kibbles back... Laughing

(Doncha hate it when people laugh at their own jokes?)

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 2:36 am

Cachuma! I luv teh ESL teacher reply! Laughing

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:23 pm

Thanks Bohigal! I haven't heard back from ESL folks yet...maybe even scam employment agencies have some standards. Laughing

But I've heard back from a few others...and lolcat replies have been sent to try to get them off-script. It must be frustrating trying to squeeze money out of a cat!

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:29 pm

That's so hilarious! I wonder if the lads will start using LOL-speak after this!

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 10:19 pm

I see I can has custom tag Wink

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 11:29 pm

sunshine wrote:

I see I can has custom tag Wink

That's perfect! Hey you started a whole new trend here...you earned it!

I'm definitely having fun with it...now that I've got a few of 'em of-script I'm sinking more into a cat personna. I'll post a couple of the better exchanges a bit later. How's your cat bait going?

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Dec 2008 Posts: 186

Any word from the ESL folks yet?

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 5:31 pm

misterdeeds wrote:

Any word from the ESL folks yet?

Y'know, it's just so hard to find a job these days. Wink

Nope, nuthin from the ESL folks yet - and that's the one I'd really like to get. If they bite, that could be publishable - just from the standpoint of how absurd it would be for them to even carry on communication with someone with such bad English skills, for a job teaching English! But it's Sunday, and as we all know, mugus are notoriously lazy on the weekends. I'll keep my fingers crossed for a response tomorrow.

I have had several responses from other catbaits, tho...my favorite so far is the Nigeria Senate Committee on Scam Victims, which is offering to give me $250,000 USD. Here's the exchange to date:

Lad:

Quote:

Attention; Sir,

This is to your notice that Nigeria senate committee on Scam victim reimbursement Committee under the strict supervision of the African Union to pay Nigerians scam victims in number of 230; the sum of $250,000 USD (Two Hundred and Fifty Thousand Dollars) each....(blah blah standard script.......)

Me:

Quote:

PLZ HALP ME. I HAS BEEN VICTIM OV SCAM FRUM MAN HOO SED HE LOVEZ ME BUT TOOK ALL MAH MONEY INSTEAD. I WUZ VRY UPSET EVEN THOUGH IM USUALLY PRITEE KEWL KAT BUT DIS HURT ME BADLY. I WUZ GOIN 2 COME 2 AFRICA 2 MEET HIM BUT AFTR I SENT HIM $5000 HE STOPPD WRITIN 2 ME. CAN U HALP GIT MAH MONEY BAK 2 ME? WUT IZ I SUPPOSD 2 DO NEXT?

Lad:

Quote:

Your mail received; and Nigeria senate committee on scam victim reimbursement has already notified us about the payment, and our bank is working very hard to see the entire short listed victim received their lost money before this month end.

Please you are hereby advice to follow the due process of having the fund released to you; by transferring or credited through ATM card; and you will be able to withdraw the money in any ATM machine around the world with the code we will issue to you. And the ATM Card will be bearing your name.

But if you wanted our bank to transfer the fund into your bank account you have to open online bank account with our bank, with the sum of $500.00...(blah blah blah standard script....)

Me:

Quote:

Im so glad 2 hear frum u. I has been so heartbroken evr since dat man took mah money an left me wif no kibble. He didnt even git chance 2 pet mah soft fur. I didnt knoe wut 2 do til u wrote me. Tell me wut 2 do next. I can put teh $500 in ur bank if u tell me wer ur bank iz. Or if thar iz wai 2 do it thru teh computr i can do dat 2 cuz im pritee gud on teh computr 4 cute kitteh.

U r vry generous an helpful 2 dis sad kat her. Thank u!

Lad:

Quote:

Madam, very sorry, can you please clearify your language. Laughing

Take note that the $500.00 you are using to open online bank account with our bank will still remain yours; and be informed that the online bank account you are opening, with our bank, you can access your money online and also transfer the fund to any of your private account of your choice.... (blah blah blah......)

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 8:06 pm

the obvious reply to this request to "clearify" your language is "I is sorry I is not understanding youz plz you rite normal eengliss kthxbai" Laughing

maybe lolcat his message and quote it below yours Wink

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 8:09 pm

This is a great idea Laughing

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 8:46 pm

I've added a new element - I've written to one of the lotto lads that I've been communicating with in lolcat, saying that I'm the winner's daughter, and that he needs to include me in all of his future correspondence with my mother, who is suffering from dementia and actually thinks she is a cat. So this should open up even more opportunities for my character to act ever more cat-like. Could be fun! (meow!)

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Dec 2008 Posts: 186

My Swedish Chef bait is starting out slow. I had to prod my lad with an additional email

Hee!
Vhee cun I get my preeze-a muney? I em a fery boosy mun und I du nut hefe-a teeme-a fur gemes. Cun yuoo pleese-a let me-a knoo vhet is heppeneeng?
Bork Bork Bork!
Sven

a few hours later I got this reply back.

SKODA MOTORS WORLDWIDE LTD.
SKODA Programs & Events Department
SKODA Motors
P.O. Box 100
London
L71 E20

The Email that you received from Mr Yap Yoon Soon(Programs & Events). is a notification email informing you that your email address was extracted from a world wide web of Organizations and was used in an Online Email Lottery.Your Email address happens to be Amongst our winning email addresses so you are expected to claim £750,000 GBP (SEVEN HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND BRITISH POUND STERLINGS).The selection process was carried our through our computerized Email Selection System (ESS) which selects email from a database of over 600,000 email address was drawn from all over the continents of the World

We received your winners verificaton form and it has been duly processed. You are hereby directed to contact the courier in which they are to inform you on how your prize £750,000 GBP (SEVEN HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND BRITISH POUND STERLINGS) will be sent to you,with the mode of delivery for your prize.Please find below contact details of the courier company:

CHE3MSFORD 3XPRESS C0URIER SERVICES.
ADDRESS:17 BELMONT CLOSE,
CHELMSFORD,ESSEX,
CM1 6UT,ENGLAND,
UNITED KINGDOM
Email: [email protected]
Contact Person: Mr. George Peterson.
Tel.: +44-703-190-6706
+44-70E3-194-5287
Fax: +44- 870-479-1768

Duely send to the courier company your informations containing your:

1. Full Name:
2. Postal Address:
3. Tel/Fax:
4. Your Email

This program is promoted and sponsored by Frontline group and SKODA Worldwide; we intend to use this medium to help individuals generate fortunes, which would encourage them to expand their business frontiers thereby creating more opportunities and assisting with humanitarian Concerns within their immediate environment. All winning must be claimed not later than one Week of Acknowledgment. After this date all unclaimed funds will be returned to SKODA Motors Treasury as Unclaimed.

Once Again We say Congratulations.

Warm Regards,
Jim W00 L33( MR.)
(Claims Agent).

I think I am gooona feffe-a fun wid dis vun bork bork bork!!

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:07 am

^^^Hey, we're baiting the same lad! Where did you get your original script? This might be one I pulled from Surplus Letters...so this poor mugu is dealing with all KINDS of funnytalkers. Hilarious!

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Dec 2008 Posts: 186

I got my script from this site:

http://www.cs.utexas.edu/~jbc/home/chef.html

They have a valleygirl and jive translator there too. I think the original letter from this lottery came from my catcher account. Man I would wager to say this guy is going to get a good mind bending between all of us baiters.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 1:24 am

Okay I checked, and it's definitely the same lad that I'm baiting with lolcat...and now my baiting character's daughter has told him that I suffer from dementia and actually believe I'm a cat! So many possibilities...

And to take it even further, he's one of the lads I'm planning on chopping using Windypop's new Gomerboyz dolla chopping modality:
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=157975

If you want to use it too, that would be hilarious! Check out the website - I've already got Jim W00 L33 on there as an agent. If we both hit him with that, he'll go berserk! Laughing

Could be delicious...

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 1:47 am

We have just discovered the meaning of "work in a kitty" Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

Don't take it personal.

Pardon me while I tuck into my rice snack.

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Dec 2008 Posts: 186

I didnt get another answer back from the lad yet. I had to send him another mail today to reiterate that I am serious...
I had to slap him a bit too.

SUB:Vhere-a Ere-a yuoo? Ere-a yuoo fur reel oor ere-a yuoo a scemmer?

Deer Sur
I em veeeting fur yuoor respunse-a. Vhy dun't yuoo vreete-a tu me-a? I sent ell zee deteeels vheech yuoo esked fur. Perheps yuoo dun't beleeefe-a me-a. Meybe-a my Ingleesh isn't guud inuoogh fur yuoo. I em getteeng fery impeteeent veet yuoo. bork bork bork!
Hoo du I knoo thet yuoo eren't un internet theeeff oor scemmer? I oofftee reed noospepers here-a in Stuckhulm ebuoot zee peuple-a frum Effreeca und Roosseea vhu steel de muney frum feectims oon zee internet. Yuoo ere-a nut oone ooff thuse-a peuple-a ere-a yuoo? Vhy dues a mun veet a kureun neme-a vurk fur a cer cumpuny frum Ioorupe-a? Thees is fery interesteeng fur me-a. Is skoda frum Feenlund oor Rumuneea? I knoo zee neme-a ooff zee cer boot I dun't knoo vhere-a it is prudooced. I hupe-a yuoo eren't internet theeefes oor scemmers. My freeend is zee Cheeeff Cunsteble-a ooff Stuckhulm Puleece-a. He-a cumes tu my hutel tu iet my speecy meetbells und fur my cekes und pestreees. Iff I feend thet yuoo ere-a a scemmer, I veell geefe-a heem yuoor eddress. Pleese-a vreete-a tu me-a suun und let me-a knoo vhet I moost du tu get my muney.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 6:48 pm

I continue to be stunned at the number of lads who are having lengthy and detailed communications with my cat. Laughing

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:21 pm

Gosh this is really funny. Sunshine, thanks for this wonderful modality. I am waiting on a promising lad to spring this on right now, so I don't have any lolcat baits on. But, just a thought, shouldn't this be stickied?