Author |
Message |
Phoebe
419Eater is my life
Joined: 12 Oct 2008
Posts: 335
Location: Central Perk... having my brothers triplets...
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 4:00 am |
|
There are 4 children. The oldest boy is from my brothers first relationship He is going to stay with his other grandmother.
Three other children. One is from her ex partner and she (6) is going to stay with her natural father and his partner.
The other two are aged 3 and 7 months and I think we will take them.
Nothing has been written down yet. We're still in shock and can't think clearly.
I don't think I'll be around much for a while. We have way to much RL to deal with right now. We're going from one 2 year old to a whole family full. You can't even imagine what its like right now |
_________________
NOBODY IS TRYING TO TRICK YOU MADAM. ALL I ASK FOR IS THE INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU USE IN SENDING THE $575. SO KINDLY SEND IT TO US--- Ad@m Ben$on
YOUR SON 1S ASK1NG ME TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH HOLD1NG THE S1GN *1 LOVE DA1SY DUCK*, BUT MADAM CONCERN1NG TH1S TRANSACT1ON 1 FEEL THAT YOUR SON 1S TRY1NG TO EMBARASS ME---Ad@m Ben$on |
|
|
|
Ima Baeder
Baiting Guru
Joined: 03 May 2007
Posts: 18313
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 4:15 am |
|
I'm very sorry to hear about your loss and difficulties, Phoebe. Take care. |
_________________ 348 Fake Sites killed
x 100 2 Years |
|
|
|
Dorothy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 09 Jul 2008
Posts: 3114
Location: somewhere over the rainbow
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 4:24 am |
|
So sorry to hear about what's going on Phoebe. Just remember you can always stop in here if you need some moral support.
Sending a few prayers for you and your family as you try to get through these very difficult times. |
_________________ "I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more..." |
|
|
|
ParaNoid
** REMEMBERED **
Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 5123
Location: Looking for Steward.
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:52 am |
|
I am sorry for your family's loss. Do take care of yourself. It sounds like you have a supportive family for the children. My thoughts and prayers are are with you all. |
_________________ Gold Coins here
x 4 <b>Looking for a Mentor? Click here</b>
"If I get mad at you, please just understand me. I am just being ParaNoid because I love you so much." - unknown
Visit www.scamwarners.com |
|
|
|
Titania
Hell on wheels
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 2442
Location: Rollin' rollin' rollin'
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:54 am |
|
Oh, I was afraid of that when you didn't post for so long.
>< Big hugs to you and those precious little ones.
I'm sure you will take good care of the ones who will come to you. Bless you and your partner for doing so. And I will continue to pray for strength and comfort for you all.
When the time is right, please consider counseling. Grief can take a long time to go through, and trying to deal with your personal grief and whatever the children are feeling may need a helping hand. |
_________________ i do not know you.you need to expanciate more - C0llins W3aver
those words really made me felt completely bad..and i had to dust my ass and wipe tears Micheal David
x 8
Stanley's Christmas Adventure 2008 - Lagos to Abuja - massbait |
|
|
|
Corona
Baiting Guru
Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 8809
Location: On ya left!
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:25 pm |
|
|
|
|
Connie L. Gus
Moderator
Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 7243
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 4:51 pm |
|
Three years ago my sister-in-law was filling out her will and called to ask me if we would take in her children if anything should happen to their parents. Immediately I said yes, I was honored to be asked and I would adopt them and raise them as my own. It was not a decision she made lightly as it meant that she was bypassing her local family and parents and saying she would rather her children travel 2500 miles away if she was not there to take care of them. Occasionally I think of her decision and how it would impact our family should we suddenly double in size, but everyday I ponder the responsibilities, efforts and rewards of parenting.
You are a good person Phoebe. Blessings upon you and the rest of your family. |
_________________ x8
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
-a few,
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
I am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate |
|
|
|
Dramaqueen
Juan's stalker
Joined: 28 Aug 2008
Posts: 1423
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:03 pm |
|
Phoebe, Im so sorry for your loss
We are always here if you need to talk.
Blessings on you for helping the little ones and giving them a home.
Your family will be in our thoughts and prayers.
We will miss seeing you around but RL has to come first. |
_________________ x5 2 From my Valentine
Sibide, Bamako-Cotonou W/Dr.S.W.
Proud member of "The Todger Club"
"why are you stingy over me" Craig
"you are causin me much frustration" Frustrated lad...
"stop makin me feel like mess and shit" Craig
"if not i will fall off from a cliff and God will kick your bud for murdering " Diamond Mo
" shot the fuck up you silly irrational bitch" V1ctor
"they make jest of me cus they tthink i am waisting my time and money talking to you" Ted
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
|
|
|
Phoebe
419Eater is my life
Joined: 12 Oct 2008
Posts: 335
Location: Central Perk... having my brothers triplets...
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 6:55 pm |
|
Thanks for the kind words.
It really doesn't seem real. I can't believe it. I'm older than her. Younger people shouldn't die. Especially not when they've got little kids.
We thought we could just take the two youngest but we have to see a counsellor first. I don't know what he (or she) is going to ask us but we have to speak to them before they let the children come to us.
the wierd thing is that my partner is Asian and my nephew and neice are blonde and blue eyed so everyone is going to know that they aren't ours by birth. Jesus, what a stupid thing to be focusing on!
We have to see the counsellor on tuesday morning.
I can't see a problem. We're in our 30's and have a 2 year old of our own. The only thing is that I thought that you're only allowed to adopt children from your own ethnicity these days? My partner is Asian
My neice (7 months) and my nephew (will be 3 in Feb) are white.
I didn't think to ask that at the time but I think this is a specific situation that the rules there might not apply so much.
I don't know what to think anymore. |
_________________
NOBODY IS TRYING TO TRICK YOU MADAM. ALL I ASK FOR IS THE INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU USE IN SENDING THE $575. SO KINDLY SEND IT TO US--- Ad@m Ben$on
YOUR SON 1S ASK1NG ME TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH HOLD1NG THE S1GN *1 LOVE DA1SY DUCK*, BUT MADAM CONCERN1NG TH1S TRANSACT1ON 1 FEEL THAT YOUR SON 1S TRY1NG TO EMBARASS ME---Ad@m Ben$on |
|
|
|
Titania
Hell on wheels
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 2442
Location: Rollin' rollin' rollin'
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 8:23 pm |
|
I don't think ethnicity should matter - you are a blood relative, and that should count for something in the decision.
You are in shock - the first of the 7 stages of grief. You will go through denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Finally, you will reach Thriving - where you use what you have gone through to help others going through the same thing. These stages do not necessarily come in order, nor do you go through some of them only once on your way to the next. When you reach Thriving, however, you have graduated. You will still miss your sister-in-law, and you will occasionally have twinges of grief, but you will be on a more even keel.
II'm glad you'll be required to have counseling. You'll do much better for having gone through it, and those children need it - even the littlest one will need to know eventually.
BTW - adoption is great from both sides. I was adopted when I was 4, and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. |
_________________ i do not know you.you need to expanciate more - C0llins W3aver
those words really made me felt completely bad..and i had to dust my ass and wipe tears Micheal David
x 8
Stanley's Christmas Adventure 2008 - Lagos to Abuja - massbait |
|
|
|
Tastysnack
Elite Baiter
Joined: 16 Jul 2008
Posts: 1407
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:16 pm |
|
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm confused though. Where is the father of the 7 month old and the 3 year old?
I hope things work out. |
_________________ "I DO NOT THINK WE CAN DO THIS TOGETHER. YOU HAVE BROUGHT MORE PAINS TO ME THAN GOOD." Mr. Wang Yan- After I attempted to rebait with same name as last time. 2-4-09
"you are the must fool i have ever seen fuck you like the 12.5 million idoit dont write me again" Radebe Gumede 7-16-09 after his bank transfer failed.
"Sorry we do not know Mr. Gomer. Send that email fromthe so called gomer to us for scrutiny."- Devati Mooleedhar
SON OF A DOG GO EAT SHIT AND DRINK WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOSERRRRRRRRR.GET A LIFE--Bakar Saud (After Mr. Gomer chopped his dolla')
YOU ATE OUR MONEY AND YOU START MOCKING US--Bishop Anthony
Fake Checks Received= $63,487 US |
|
|
|
PRS Girly Girl
Will Post for Food
Joined: 06 Mar 2007
Posts: 1174
Location: Any place where cute shoes are on sale.
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:27 pm |
|
Phoebe, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your sister in law. I hope everything with the children works out. Lean on your family and friends for support, and let them lean on you. You all need each other to get through difficult times like this. Together you are stronger then you can imagine. |
_________________ "A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are." Chauncey Mitchell Depew
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." Robert A. Heinlein
x3
Banjul, The Gambia to Dakar, Senegal and back. 0usman C4mar4 |
|
|
|
Phoebe
419Eater is my life
Joined: 12 Oct 2008
Posts: 335
Location: Central Perk... having my brothers triplets...
|
Posted:
Fri Jan 23, 2009 10:31 pm |
|
Tastysnack wrote: |
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm confused though. Where is the father of the 7 month old and the 3 year old?
I hope things work out. |
That's my brother Ts. He's taking this very hard and if anything we need to look after him. I don't know how it's going to be 6 months down the line but right now he can't even take care of himself. |
_________________
NOBODY IS TRYING TO TRICK YOU MADAM. ALL I ASK FOR IS THE INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU USE IN SENDING THE $575. SO KINDLY SEND IT TO US--- Ad@m Ben$on
YOUR SON 1S ASK1NG ME TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH HOLD1NG THE S1GN *1 LOVE DA1SY DUCK*, BUT MADAM CONCERN1NG TH1S TRANSACT1ON 1 FEEL THAT YOUR SON 1S TRY1NG TO EMBARASS ME---Ad@m Ben$on |
|
|
|
Phoebe
419Eater is my life
Joined: 12 Oct 2008
Posts: 335
Location: Central Perk... having my brothers triplets...
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 2:27 am |
|
Titania wrote: |
You are in shock - the first of the 7 stages of grief. You will go through denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. |
I bloody am. Shock, anger and denial. Nothing else has kicked in yet.
Just anger, denial and shock. I won't be baiting anymore. I'll probably lurk for a while and see how I feel in a few months. If I have time.
thanks again.
xx |
_________________
NOBODY IS TRYING TO TRICK YOU MADAM. ALL I ASK FOR IS THE INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU USE IN SENDING THE $575. SO KINDLY SEND IT TO US--- Ad@m Ben$on
YOUR SON 1S ASK1NG ME TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH HOLD1NG THE S1GN *1 LOVE DA1SY DUCK*, BUT MADAM CONCERN1NG TH1S TRANSACT1ON 1 FEEL THAT YOUR SON 1S TRY1NG TO EMBARASS ME---Ad@m Ben$on |
|
|
|
SlapHappy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:12 am |
|
Oh, Phoebe, I'm so sorry to hear the bad news.
My thoughts and prayers go out to the whole family. Once the shock wears off a bit, it will be easier to deal with. You should have no trouble in any of the adoptions, as they are all family. Just take things one day at a time, and you will get through it ok. You know you have many friends here to talk to, whenever you feel the need. <hug> |
_________________ x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
x10 X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
(19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
|
|
|
|
Reaper
Hello I'm New here!
Joined: 06 May 2007
Posts: 0
Location: Travelling in a fried-out combie. On a hippie trail, head full of zombie...
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:31 am |
|
Sorry to hear the bad news, Phoebe. I wish you the best of luck. |
_________________ 110+
x15 x18 50+
Shola - 4.3k miles Lagos - Abidjan | Lagos - N'Djamena, Chad | Lagos - Sokoto "i have not eaten anything except water"
Mr Floyd - Lagos - N'Djamena, Chad | Lagos -N'Djamena --> Abeche, with RS (7 days in hell ) "we are dieing here"
Art Trophies: <a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=129502">Eva Bust</a> - <a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=135167">Reaper's Art Gallery</a>
- I am the King of Rome, and above grammar
|
|
|
|
embalmer
Not quite a Newb
Joined: 03 Jan 2009
Posts: 64
Location: Where are you again? Oh, I'm only 200 miles away, just over the border!
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:34 am |
|
Will help with the kids, highly respected world class resourse, lots of good information
http://www.dougy.org/ |
_________________ We are security farm that’s why we are careful about realising information to people |
|
|
|
Phoebe
419Eater is my life
Joined: 12 Oct 2008
Posts: 335
Location: Central Perk... having my brothers triplets...
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 8:19 pm |
|
^^ Thank you. That's exactly what we need right now. I'd also be interested if anyone knows of any good books that they would recommend?
We're seeing a counsellor on Tuesday morning (myself and my partner). I don't know why, but I think it's just to make sure that we're suitable to take the children. I can't see a problem with that. Neither of us has ever been in trouble with the police and we're both in our 30's, been together for almost 5 years and have a 2 year old of our own.
My parents are over 60, dad is alcoholic (not violent or anything, just a bit unreliable) and mum has a heart condition, and our sister has 5 children and is pregnant with her 6th and about to be divorced so I can't see that anyone else would be more suitable than we would.
I'm sure it's going to be ok. They couldn't possibly think that the kids would be better off anywhere else. We're healthy and in a stable relationship. I'm sure it's going to be ok. |
_________________
NOBODY IS TRYING TO TRICK YOU MADAM. ALL I ASK FOR IS THE INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU USE IN SENDING THE $575. SO KINDLY SEND IT TO US--- Ad@m Ben$on
YOUR SON 1S ASK1NG ME TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH HOLD1NG THE S1GN *1 LOVE DA1SY DUCK*, BUT MADAM CONCERN1NG TH1S TRANSACT1ON 1 FEEL THAT YOUR SON 1S TRY1NG TO EMBARASS ME---Ad@m Ben$on |
|
|
|
SlapHappy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 8:40 pm |
|
Once you meet with them and they know you are financially able to provide for them and that they are loved by you both, everything will be fine, Phoebe. Even though it is a bad predicament for the children to be in, let them know that your are in control of things and will help the children get through these hard times. Your family will do everything they can to keep the children in contact with each other as much as possible. I pray everything will work out for you all the way you want it to, and I hope the children will soon be able to accept the loss and go on with life as normally as possible. God bless you and your family, Phoebe. |
_________________ x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
x10 X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
(19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
|
|
|
|
Bella
419Eater is my life
Joined: 01 Aug 2006
Posts: 272
Location: Australia
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 9:15 pm |
|
Phoebe I am so sorry to you and your family your loss.
I am sure the authorities will see the benefit of both children being together with you, not only for their normal well-being but for their fragile mental state too.
You take care and please remember that all of us, (your other 'family'), will be sending our love and support to you always.
Take care and hugs to all the little ones. |
_________________ <a href="/forum/donate.php">[Click here to donate to 419Eater.com]</a>
I am just tired for all these problems when things appear to be moving smooth, then something keeps going wrong.- Mustapha Mallam
HELLO SIR, I AM SORY FOR THE DELAY OF THE REPLY OF YOUR MAIL, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT IT�S BECAUSE OF THE CRISTMAS, AND WHEN IT IS CRISTMASS MOST OF THE REFUGEE IN THE CAMP RUN AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK SO WHEN IT IS CRISTMASS THEY DON�T ALOW US TO GO OUT.- Lofty Kamara |
|
|
|
Pachanga
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Dec 2005
Posts: 3551
|
Posted:
Sat Jan 24, 2009 9:49 pm |
|
Phoebe, I am very sorry for your loss. It won't be easy to take in two little ones, but you will be rewarded for your unselfishness. You certainly don't owe anyone an explanation about the children.
I know a woman who adopted a boy, then a short time later she gave birth to a girl. Her children and their friends would ask her about the boy being adopted. The woman would pretend to be confused and say she couldn't remember which child was adopted. The children were delighted with that because she made them understand that adoption and birth are equally valued.
Best wishes to you. |
_________________ I HAVE HEARD OF YOUR EVIL DEEDS IN THE NET HACKING PEOPLE INFORMATION BUT OLLOOOKUN THE GOD OF MOMBASSA KENYA WILL STRANGLE YOU ON YOUR BED IN 7 DAYS TIME, COUNTING FROM TODAY. (8/03/2008)
Lome, Togo to Bouake, Ivory Coast
Lagos to Abuja
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
|
|
|
Nanny Ogg
Baiting Guru
Joined: 19 Mar 2007
Posts: 2628
|
Posted:
Sun Jan 25, 2009 8:01 pm |
|
I'm so sorry how things have worked out, there must gave been hope she would recover
My best wishes to you and your partner.
I do hope your brother finds the strength eventually to cope with it all |
|
|
|
|
BluthBanana
Baiting Guru
Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 2260
Location: Balboa Towers
|
Posted:
Sun Jan 25, 2009 9:05 pm |
|
I'm so sorry for your loss, Phoebe. Your family is in my thoughts. |
_________________ {Area 419: Scambaiting Radio}
x11 x17 x3
x115
x2
Art baits: X-Wing
419 Eater Theatre: The Hitchhiker
Lads & Crocodiles: x3 x3 {John} {Willie} {Kingsley}
x2 - . .
"I will never forgive you for all the pains, trouble, frustrations, strandedness and disappointments you have caused us." - David |
|
|
|
Tastysnack
Elite Baiter
Joined: 16 Jul 2008
Posts: 1407
|
Posted:
Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:32 pm |
|
Again, I'm sorry for your loss.
However, I must confess I am confused at your need to rush out to "adopt" the children. I realize that your brother is in grief. Rather than try to "adopt" the children, why not just take them in until he is ready to parent them again?
It seems rather presumptious to think that you need to obtain custody in order to care for them. I could see the hurry if both parents had died, but in this case, there is 1 living parent in the picture. |
_________________ "I DO NOT THINK WE CAN DO THIS TOGETHER. YOU HAVE BROUGHT MORE PAINS TO ME THAN GOOD." Mr. Wang Yan- After I attempted to rebait with same name as last time. 2-4-09
"you are the must fool i have ever seen fuck you like the 12.5 million idoit dont write me again" Radebe Gumede 7-16-09 after his bank transfer failed.
"Sorry we do not know Mr. Gomer. Send that email fromthe so called gomer to us for scrutiny."- Devati Mooleedhar
SON OF A DOG GO EAT SHIT AND DRINK WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOSERRRRRRRRR.GET A LIFE--Bakar Saud (After Mr. Gomer chopped his dolla')
YOU ATE OUR MONEY AND YOU START MOCKING US--Bishop Anthony
Fake Checks Received= $63,487 US |
|
|
|
Titania
Hell on wheels
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 2442
Location: Rollin' rollin' rollin'
|
Posted:
Mon Jan 26, 2009 7:06 pm |
|
This may be hard to hear, but it is never good to make irrevocable decisions when you are in the midst of emotional upheaval. Even if your brother says he wants you to adopt the children, it would not be wise for him to sign papers relinquishing his parental rights while he is so deeply in grief.
I agree with Tastysnack. Take them in, by all means. Care for them and nurture them. When he is ready to be a father again, let him be their father.
Don't make any decisions you may later regret. You are in no state to make such choices. I'm sure the social workers and counselors will tell you the same thing. If they don't, then they do not have the best interest of the children at heart. |
_________________ i do not know you.you need to expanciate more - C0llins W3aver
those words really made me felt completely bad..and i had to dust my ass and wipe tears Micheal David
x 8
Stanley's Christmas Adventure 2008 - Lagos to Abuja - massbait |
|
|
|
|