my opening letter

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Sep 2008 Posts: 35

I became tired of requests for more info about myself form these jerks (not that they really care) so I knocked this off quickly. I wanted to be just weird and silly enough to keep me interested. I can't wait to hear the sympathetic responses.

Hi!
A bit about myself. I am a retired sheepshagger here in Nebraska. I worked for 35 years as a Head Giver
Sheepshagger in a private farm my daddy left me. I am married with two wives (my religion allows two wives)
and 17 children. We have a small family run business producing custom yellow widgets as it is easier than
facing the cold winters shagging sheep.
Seven years ago I fell into a woodchipper here on the farm and both my arms and legs were mangled
so my children help with my daily feeding and bathing activities.
Please write me back and tell me more about yourself.
I am waiting to hear from you!
Sincerely,
Gomer Pyle

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 3123

Well if you get an intelligent lad, they may click. Luckily there aren't too many around.

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 5:07 pm

Hey boyu,

I will agree that your approach is funny, but I hate to see your effort wasted on a lad who isn't off-script yet.

When they ask me for my personal information I usually just shoot back with a suspicious reply.
I hate being passed around by all the banks, barristers etc because I tend to get them all confused if I have more than one bait going.

Quote:

Dear Sir,
The information you are requesting is rather personal. I am a very secretive person and do not give out such information to people whom I have never heard of or seen.

Or maybe try.

Quote:

Dear Sir,
I do not trust banks, lawyers, barristers, and security companies. I prefer to deal with only you, and I prefer to deal on cash-only basis.

I have the suspicion that you may be a member of my country's law enforcement, seeing as they have tried to trap me in this same manner in the past.

Just remember that you are the driver, and your lad is the passenger. NOT the other way around.

Have fun!

Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 5:09 pm

Very nice, this asks for long letters with lots of strange typoo's becaause your toonguuee steeeereeeeed tyyyypiiiiiing gaaaaaaaaaadget geeeeeeeeeets tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeettttttttttttttttttttt Laughing

just use the replace function and change all singe "e's" into "eeeeee" Will be hell to read and imagine what the MTCN number will look like

Mod edit: Deleted controversial comment. Pachanga
And edited again by Bill2 leaving one word out so the rest makes some sense.
Edit: I like this, when he complains about it, let your little grand kid help you as that's the only one you can trust with that money order.

1st email" hello?"
2nd email " are you there?"
3rd email " who are you? "
4th email --might take him awhile to get paid now Laughing

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 5:27 pm

boyufistme wrote:

Sincerely,
Gomer Pyle

Er, you do know GomerPyle is a forum member? I wouldn't use the name as a baiting character without his permission. Or at all, come to think of it. There's a slight risk of a lad googling it, and being led here.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Sep 2008 Posts: 35

OK I'll change it no problem. thanks B

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 8:36 pm

For the first time, I just tell the lads that I am interested, how can I help?,
and please send me details.

The first few emails are scripted anyway.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Sep 2008 Posts: 35

I do as well. Amazing how "OK, let's do it!" encourages them. Many were always asking for more info and I didn't want to type new stuff all the time. I'll probably elaborate and make it weirder all the time with new excuses. They all want ID. Must be new passports they're after. Bastards.

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 9:15 pm

trying different things is the beauty of baiting, there is no right or wrong.

well there is wrong, but those usually end with really cool insults Wink

just realize the first few emails often times aren't even read. have fun with them...

Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 9:42 pm

The lad will get about this far

Quote:

Hi!
A bit about myself. I am a retired

then forward you the next part of his script.

I doubt many will see the humor you implied. Those who do read it all will like that you are retired and religious.

Hell, I think it's a fairly decent first reply if you're going to cut and paste.

Quote:

Er, you do know GomerPyle is a forum member? I wouldn't use the name as a baiting character without his permission.

GP doesn't own the rights to the name Gomer Pyle. Besides, he way too nice to say anything Very Happy

Quote:

Or at all, come to think of it. There's a slight risk of a lad googling it, and being led here.

I think the lad will be distracted by other things before hit number 320,999 Laughing

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=Gomer+Pyle&start=0&sa=N

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 11:24 pm

All I know is, if you use Gomer's name, he always gets to claim all the safari hats, and all the trophies for his own. Cross him and not pay up, and he'll chop all the stuff you try to put anywhere in your siggy. Laughing

Posted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 12:18 am

Aye, 'tis a noble profession, to be sure......