Orphanage burns down - 7 children die

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Posted: Sat Nov 22, 2008 6:14 pm

Sometimes something evil comes over me - keep in mind that this is a scam mail

Quote:

Dear Pastor

I think you must agree that the fire has actually been a blessing from the Lord as now you have seven less children to look after, and therefore seven less mouths to feed, so you must have a surplus of funds at your disposal. I cannot think of any reason why you should need more funds to feed less children, otherwise every time you allow children in your care to die you will want more money, and you will find it better for your children to die than keep them alive.

You have failed to see the Lord's hands at work in this good fortune and certainly you should sack your book keeper for failing to advise you on your changed financial position. I am sure you will have recognised that I am an investment broker and can provide valuable advice as regards the manner in which you can utilise these surplus funds to the greater glory of your enterprise.

I am reassured to note that the parish internet cafe is functioning and that you have left the remaining children in your care in solitary contemplation of their recently departed little friends. You are indeed selfless to sacrifice these children to the greater glory of your work and I trust that you will be rewarded in heaven as you, no doubt will be on earth, with nothing but the best wishes of all those you contact.

Indeed my company has donated $500,000 to these children in Goma whose need is the greater for being so recently orphaned, and a shipment of laptop computers is speeding its way to them to ensure that we will never fail to know of their plight and be given the opportunity to meet their every need.

Please bless us for our generosity and I let you know you are in our thoughts and prayers.

Best Wishes

This not a way to bait this type of scammer, but it was fun composing it.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 2628

Naughty Gomer
Go stand in the corner

and please stop giggling

Laughing

Posted: Sat Nov 22, 2008 11:22 pm

Pure magic, Gomer Laughing

. Would love to be a fly on the wall watching a lad read it.

Baiting Guru Joined: 29 Jan 2008 Posts: 2531 Location: AU

I dont know what it is but gomer seems to have some sort of mojo field unlike any i have seen.

love your work

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 1:01 am

Very well argued. Gomer.

I look forward to the Lad's reponce. An outbreak of births, perhaps?

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 1:16 am

^ Maybe a sudden influx of Congolese orphans?

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 2:54 am

indeed heart breaking Wink

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 4:42 am

Please post a response if you get one!

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 6:26 am

That is the sweetest letter I've ever read , I hope you can step it up a notch in your next one Wink

Posted: Sun Nov 23, 2008 7:44 am

I don't think I'm going to get a reply somehow Laughing

- but I thought I'd stick the knife in a little deeper and convince him that his format is crap without giving him too much of a hint on how to improve it.

Quote:

Dear Pastor

I hope you didn't think my previous mail was heartless because I didn't wish it to sound that way. It is widely known that Nigeria is the world's sixth largest oil producer and most people believe that Nigerian orphans all swan around in Cadillacs with their own servants and laze by the swimming pool all day.

If orphans in an oil rich country like Nigeria can't look after themselves. What's the problem ? Are they suffering from penal tax rates ?

Please let me know if you have any deserving cause to which we can make a donation to and I will contact my clients to make a substantial payment and profit from the beneficial tax breaks.

Best Regards

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