How did you react with the first nasty mail?

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Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 1:32 pm

Hi All,

slightly bizarre question, but I wondered how the established baiters dealt with any nasty mails they may have had when they began baiting?

I appreciate that you are baiting as a fictitious character, and that you're probably prepared for some unpleasant mail if the baiting winds them up, but did any of you find you had to step away from it for a while because it still left a nasty feeling in your gut to have that venom directed at you (albeit not the 'real' you)?

I realise that it's something that probably doesn't affect you once you've been at it for a while, but when you started out, did any of your lads ever say anything that made you feel uncomfortable, and how did you learn to stop yourself reacting to it?

I've been studying the Baiter University since joining here, and love the mock webcam lessons, and the love baiting, but until I'm a little bit wiser to the methods and I have a mentor in place, I'll be a 'read-only' member for a little while longer.

It was reading the Love baiter forum that prompted me to ask, as it seems that some of these lads could get quite abusive if provoked, and if you're new at it, I imagine it could leave you a little shaken the first time.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 1:36 pm

I for one, relish the nasty emails, always have. It shows that you're getting under their skin. Some of us, myself included, send out mass insult mails to other lads posing as other scammers.

We also add the best (as in funniest) insults to our signature lines as a badge of honor.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 1:42 pm

Hi Lady V

To me the ultimate trophy is a 'Death threat' Recieve a couple of these and you know you have done your job well.

It's very easy to get the lads to insult you. You don't even have to bait them...just a couple of nasty e-mails straight of the bat will sometimes spark a retort.

What I am talking about are the long baits...the ones where your lad is as 'nice as pie' just so long as he thinks he can get his hands on your money Laughing

When these kind of baits result in a right old slanging match or a death threat/ voodoo curse...then just savour the moment and pat yourself on the back for a job well done Wink

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 1:43 pm

First, welcome to Eater! Glad to see you are studying up a the University. There's lots of good stuff there.

Anyway, the insults are what I live for. I feel like I haven't done my job if I haven't wound each one of them up at some point or another. There's no way I could take their words to heart. Besides, their rants are so entertaining Laughing

Remember you are the one in control. If the lad goes off on you, you fire right back. It's always the lads fault for anything. They never get the last word.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 1:44 pm

Hi and welcome Very Happy

and thanks for your nice words!

Death threads and nasty words are somehow seen as a trophy here.
sir scam alot gave the explanation.
You know you have not offered your real persona in a love bait, you cannot be hit since your RL details are unknown to the scammer.
it´s a mixture of realizing the amount of wasted time on you, and raising his fist helplessly.

Personally, I cannot recall a single incidence having felt personally hurt by anything a lad said who wanted to insult my character. They only know my character, not me.

Master Baiter Joined: 09 Apr 2008 Posts: 114

Hi there. I have loved the insults that I receive from day one. I send out many insult mails and receiving an insult in my inbox first thing in the morning is like being 10 years old and getting up on Christmas day.

I'm sure that when you get to understand these scumbags you will become immune to their insults.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 2:24 pm

Thanks for those views.

No, I get that it's directed at the character you've created, I just wondered if any of them had said anything that gave you some unease.

It was one of the first lessons I learned when I began internet dating actually, that you are in control, and that no-one has the right to make you feel uncomfortable in your own home on your own computer. And it was thanks to this site that, by coincidence, a prolific scammer tried to get me on Netlog - I was busy reading the signs to look out for on here, when his user name caught my interest, as he was supposedly a white guy from Texas, but his message was slightly 'off' in the wording (it had 002 after an ordinary name). I Googled it and found a page of warnings about him, from Scamwarners, Romancescams, et al. It was what prompted me to join up here, and to see if I could learn to bait as well.

I think, like I said, I need to harden off a little by following the threads to see the sorts of things likely to be said, as I can be a sensitive little flower at times Mr. Green

Seriously, though, I like the idea of giving as good as I get - seems like it could be a cathartic way of venting whatever has piddled me off during the day, at someone who is far more deserving of it!

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 2:43 pm

Quote:

you had to step away from it for a while because it still left a nasty feeling in your gut to have that venom directed at you

Yes, it did. It's not really nice to fool people even if they are criminals and you loose perspective as you only have the picture(s) of those nice good looking people ( I play out the family angle) and that made me think twice about it. I straight bait as a wealthy old fart with no computer knowledge and have to act that way towards the scammer, so you can't really tell him what you think about it. (I'm a poor old fart with no computer knowledge so the role fits very well Laughing

)
If it gets too much I think about a fat dirty fifty year old guy making his living with cheating people out of their money and using young helpers in humiliating pictures or when tattoo's need to be done. If that doesn't work I read a few victim stories and get so angry that I pick up a few more lads, just so they can enjoy my company Twisted Evil

.
But that all hasn't happened in a long time, I guess I have grown calluses where the friction was. But I can remember feeling awkward in the beginning wondering if I was lowering myself to their level, but it takes a thief to catch one. Thanks to the gang here I stayed reasonable sane, had fun and helped a few lads to their gray hair. Laughing

Hey guys I wrote "reasonable" don't start picking on me now Laughing

Do what you feel is right, stop if it gets too much for you, your lad can always wait.
Good to have you on board.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:01 pm

Hi Lady Vetinari

.. as people have said, the death threats and insults are treasted as trophies, though you earn no icons for them, baiters will use the best ones in their siggy lines.

I have some beauties but no longer have the space to include them, ranging from juju death curses, threats to myself and my family, sexual ones too and insults galore. I will eventually get round toputting them on my 419eater webspace.

None of them can make me do anything but laugh as I bait safe. If they had any personal information then they would be a matter of concern to me, but why would I give them any real life information ? At the moment I am baiting as a female (Russian living in Paris), and they believe it, so the threats I get (if he ever catches on), will be ridiculous.

This hobby can certainly hone your interpersonal skills and make you better able to handle people in real life. As an honest and up front person I often put up with a lot before I blow up. Now I am better able to remain cool and charming and handle people firmly without reaching the 'blow up' situation.

It's very cathartic having free rein to play with a scammers mind, and I have found it beneficial to learn about myself and how to handle people.

It's much cheaper than going to an analyst Very Happy

and if I break a scammer's mind I just and pick up a fresh one.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:13 pm

My standard response to a nasty mail is usually like this:

Quote:

"What's your big problem, small boi? Gomer boyze chop your dollar? Mr. Gomer cut your jobs?

Get off the internet and go back to your village. Maybe your momma will take care of you again since you're still such a small boi."

Sometimes I receive a nasty ASEM from another baiter. This kind of response smokes him out and then we have a good chuckle and wish each other well.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:17 pm

Thanks GomerPyle - I have been reading your thread with increasing hysteria Very Happy

By the way, after the phone calls, you really should gargle with honey and lemon Hon - cos the lady sounds like she's on 80 a day at the moment!

But yes, I can see how offloading all that angst onto a lad could cut down on the valium intake.

Now my youngest, who's 12, reckons I'd be quite good at the pimp my phone thing - a little way off yet, but another area to explore at some point.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:25 pm

Personally i find the bad spelling in lad insults defuses them somewhat. Also different cultures have different "levels" of insults. For instance we in the english-speaking west (Britain, USA, Canada etc) prefer the genito-urinary type of insults. But in other cultures the very worst insult is to call somebody a pig, which to us makes the 'attacker' sound distinctly like they are 6 years old. Lads also seem to regard "Big fool" as a pretty severe put-down Laughing

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:45 pm

Yes - I noticed the voice problem when I replayed one conversation back on my Windows media Player, which automatically restarts the recording at the end, and I noticed my voice change, and that's hilarious.

It's just not a part of my vocal chord I use much. I used to ask female baiters to do my female calls, but that's not fair and I like to have full control of what's going on, especially as my imagination is quite active.

Female phone baiters are quite deadly, and ones such as 419weasel and Persephone, and VPmanchester who ran a pimp my number baiting service, have a mythical status.

I can't allow the fact that I am male to stop me joining in the fun.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 4:06 pm

I've not had much nasty mail really... probably because I straight bait most of the time, and I never burn lads, I just drift away. I think the insult baiters get quite a lot. Most of mine tend to just ask me where things have gone wrong... they're confused and dissapointed.

After helping Prof and JoJo with a bit of phone baiting (where the lad was dropped right in the muck with his boss) I got a few phone death threats. I had to double check my phone security procedures as the lad was only about 10 miles away from my house. I was just making sure I was being extra careful though, there's no harm in that.
I laugh about it now, and would quite like a few more.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 4:13 pm

I miss my nasty mail when I don't get any. Of course I harvest lads e-mails and intentionally send them insults about them, their mothers, their sisters and their shrine.... I think I'll have to work in a bit about how all their dollars are being chopped by the Gomer Boyz. So I intentionally seek out the hate mail Smile

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 5:07 pm

Nasty emails are proof we got to them, we did real harm to their scamming, and that fewer people are being scammed.

Bring them on Wink

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 5:21 pm

I think my reaction to my first nasty mail was-Yes!I'm doing this right!
That being said,most people don't get such venom directed at them every day,so it may cause some discomfort for a while.Deal with this scum long enough,and you may start to enjoy it too.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 5:53 pm

Like everyone else here, I relish a lad sending me abuse.

It means that I've made enough of an impact on him for him to warrant spending time hating me.
What more could any baiter want?
Twisted Evil

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 7:39 pm

I've received emails from romance lads that were abusive, and manipulative.
They got under my skin, and I felt very angry, and disgusted. I've learned to read them, let myself feel angry, click off, and then think about how I can cause them mental pain. The lad that upset me the most is the one of the two I managed to send on safari.

I created a dolla chopper character and used him to abuse the lad. The bait is still going strong, and now get a good laugh out of the games.

Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 10:47 pm

Response in today

Quote:

May the God of tunder strike you and that of your G0mer death

Short but sweet and not good enough to make my siggy line.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:55 am

Scarlett wrote:

I've received emails from romance lads that were abusive, and manipulative.
They got under my skin, and I felt very angry, and disgusted. I've learned to read them, let myself feel angry, click off, and then think about how I can cause them mental pain.

Thanks, Scarlett, this is exactly the type of scenario I was thinking of when I wrote my OP. But having read through the replies here, and your advice about causing mental pain, it's clarified the areas of concern.

So I reckon the way forward when I get started is to a) ensure they get back far worse than they give, b) ensure that another lad gets the full offload of the baiter's angst, c) ensure that they all get a fair share of abuse at some point, and d) understand that abuse indicates a bait is working and keeping a genuine victim out of the loop.

Thanks to all of you who've taken the time to write down your experience and advice on dealing with it.

Master Baiter Joined: 25 Jun 2008 Posts: 123

i must admit, the first time i got an insult back in an email i just laughed. In RL i am fairly sensitive (particularly regarding insults- i sometimes think people are having a go at me even when they arent) but online with a fake persona it has never bothered me

i think partly this is because they werent insulting me personally, but also it had a lot to do with the fact the insult didnt really make sense and was very badly worded/ spelt. It was kind of hard to take it seriously

My only real reaction was to become more determined to really get under the skin of my lad. He didnt insult me personally, but he insulted my character and it just so happens that i like my character- i created him and im damned if im going to let some sleazy scam artist give him abuse! Its great if your lad sends you some abuse just as you are getting bored of him, it gets you back involved again!

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:24 am

OK - I've always been a little different. Here's my response to a load of abuse from a love-lad (I won't reproduce his email - use your imagination):

Quote:

Thank you for your warm and heartfelt response to my email. It is clear to me that you need something in your life which is lacking.

I will pray for you that God will touch your heart with honesty, true love, and compassion.

The lads may be expecting anger, profanity, obscenity, or being ignored. I wonder how many times they get prayed for. Mr. Green

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

^^^ Titania, you are an evil person. Very Happy

Keep up the good work.

I can't insult bait. I wrote a fantastic insult once and sent it to 150 lads. I got one reply, the whole text of which was "very good". Crying or Very sad

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:13 am

thud419 wrote:

I can't insult bait. I wrote a fantastic insult once and sent it to 150 lads. I got one reply, the whole text of which was "very good". Crying or Very sad

Please tell us what you wrote so that we can analyze it.

Welcome to Eater, Lady V Very Happy

To have some balance, you need a mentor who always stands by you, for better and worse. Anyway you will soon forget even the best/worst insults you get from the lads. I have had nasty feelings but mostly when I have sent some <NSFW> stuff to my lads and they have liked it too much Confused

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