Shorty - goes pervy - my bad influence ?

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Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 1:54 pm

GP, I think the gang has no doubts. Very Happy

By the way, Sverdlovsk is known as Yekaterinburg nowadays. Nicholas II and his family were executed in the city. Boris Yeltsin was a party boss there.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 2:26 pm

@Niagara O'Roar Again! - That's one of the great things about this forum.
Amidst all the insanity, we learn valuable history lessons, trivia, and culture. Smile

{which we can use to our advantage against the lads.. Wink

}

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 5:46 pm

I've had a mail from Shorty.

He is totally freaking insane. I have another of his pictures off the web - of a yellow Volkswagen Beetle - as he's been hiding in the bushes and believes this to be a suspect vehicle, and he's reported it to the police. Rolling Eyes

It seems my guess about the house description fits somehow. I'll post it up shortly.

Quote:

Dear Luddy,

How are you today and hope you really doing good overthere and i prayed you will be fine soonest!
I was at the address with the assistance of the map you gave to me last yesterday, i was able to locate the house!
The compound consist of 2 different buildings, a big flat at the front and another mini-flat at the backyard. It has a very rough gates and No14 was boldly written on the gate!

Now, some cars were parked at the front of the building and i guess of the cars belongs to these crooks. So down here, i have attached the type of the car i saw and it must be the type of the car that was used in carrying you down to the place!
I also saw some men standing at the side corridor of the last flat on the first building ( Stairs) at the front house.
I have gotten the police informed about these and make usre you get back to me asap,

bruce

.....and Shorty now has this annoying habit of saying house and sending Ludmi||a a picture of a house to show what he means, and now the same with the car. There must be a name for this weirdness.

I don't know if it's a test or not, so I'll say no. Very Happy

I'm really going off short people.

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 7:37 pm

Another 20 minute call. I'll get it posted up shortly.

I'm sure at one stage he was starting to cry.

The raid is on for Wednesday.

Apparently the Commander wasn't there to authorise it today, but listen yourself. It's not always easy to understand him, so when that happens, I wing it and it's worked so far.

I promised to send him some special pictures of me and asked if he would send his, and he agreed. I just have to set up a new mailbox. Everything I want, he provides. I'll ask him to run into the compound with a fish on his head maybe. Laughing

http://Gomer.fileave.com/LudmillaVShorty10.mp3

He does end up crying at times - listen and cry with him too. Laughing

I have set up a top security box and will send him a nice smutty photo and hope to get his picture by return.

The best thing is that I have to clear my throat near the start, and it's clearly audible, and he doesn;t wonder why some guy;s clearing his throat right next to me. Speaking like this is doing my throat a lot of harm.

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 7:57 pm

Quote:

he's been hiding in the bushes

I can't stop laughing.

If he can't send his own picture, ask him to take sample pictures of very short men. But I'm sure we will see his face.

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 8:06 pm

At one stage I recall he mentions binoculars, but he can't make himself appear any more ridiculous that he is already - except if he wore a clump of grass on his head I suppose. Laughing

He had me foxed when he mentioned 'beauty' but that's how he pronounces 'Beetle'.

Am I going to be stuck having to bait as Ludmi||a for ever ? Shocked

It's like shooting fish in a barrel, but I'm not entirely comfortable with being a transvestite baiter. Laughing

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 8:06 pm

GP:

I love your female voice. Very sexy! The police raid should be epic.

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 8:11 pm

Quote:

I'm not entirely comfortable with being a transvestite baiter.

You will get used to it and you can always have side characters. I'm begging you. You must not stop. See how excited The Man is Very Happy

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 9:26 pm

Quote:

but I'm not entirely comfortable with being a transvestite baiter.

After listening to the calls, you could have fooled me! Laughing

Please don't stop, in the interest of your fellow baiters enjoyment.

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 9:38 pm

I loved how Shorty kept telling you to be calm. He was the one losing it. Laughing

I look forward to seeing his picture here.

Great work GP!

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 9:44 pm

He was crying wasn't he ?

He asked if they were feeding me or not and I didn't catch what he was saying and answered "No", and that appeared to set him off. Shocked

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 9:54 pm

OMG! When you told Shorty that he was "the only one for you," and he cried out, "Why do you say that, Luddy?" and started to cry a bit, I lost it!

LMAO He might be falling for you after all, Gomer. Maybe it's not all about the money.

Waiting for that pic, too.
This bait is damaging your voice and our stomachs. I can't stop laughing.

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 6:31 am

The problem with trying to provide anything for Dan's show is that 90% of the whole 20 minute call is Shorty boringly going into minute detail over things and then there are just little gems sprinkled about.

I'll see if I can produce an edited version of his latest call.

I've set up a secure mail account (one Mr G0mer doesn't know about Very Happy

) and sent Shorty some nice snaps, and asked for his. Here's hoping.

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 11:46 am

Om my word - Ludmi||a was so excited to find a photo of her lover was in - and when she saw it she was overwhelmed and lost consciousness and woke up in a delerious fit.

Proof - there is Life on Mars !!!!

- and I hate to show that I have been looking at this closely, but have you seen the length of his - fingernails !!!!! ???

He says he's 24 and he certainly sounds mature on the phone. Maybe this is of him as a child, and maybe since he probably stopped growing at that age (apart from his fingernails) he wanted me to see him at his best.

Shorty is never boring.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 12:06 pm

Great trophy pic, Gomer! Laughing

I think I detect some nail polish on those long fingernails. I wonder how he looks in his pink dress? Perhaps when Mr. Gomer finally get's his hands on this photo, he could get all mushy and lovey-dovey with the lad. Wink

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 12:35 pm

Definitely the sensitive and artistic Lad is our Shorty...

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 12:44 pm

I truly hope he is a left handed classical guitar player.

Any other reasons why the fingernails on one hand are so long, I just don't want to know.

...or maybe it's a genetic adaption that enables a 419 scammer to type quicker - certainly not more accurately.

... and what are those emetal reinforced holes on his shoulder. Maybe he's a part-time shop sign and is hung on a hook outside during the day.

.... and if he came into your police station with a story about a kidnapped Russian model, what would you do ? I'd kick his butt into a lower earth orbit.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 1:08 pm

GomerPyle wrote:

... and what are those emetal reinforced holes on his shoulder. Maybe he's a part-time shop sign and is hung on a hook outside during the day.

I think that Shorty's other job is pulling a cart.
http://goatconnection.com/articles/publish/article_159.shtml
Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

He appears to be quite short. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 2:43 pm

I really can't wait to get a place of my own and set up my computer again. It's so difficult to listen to these phone calls at work and have to explain why there is coffee dribbling out of my nose LOL_sign

This is too good. Gomer, thank you so much for the much-needed laughter.

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 6:36 pm

I was going to be out on Wednesday, and I thought that might be a good idea.

However, for the purposes of obtaining confirmation of what happens, maybe I should get him on the phone.

That would be a horriby bastard sort of thing to do, but it seems pointless to have this happen and then leave it as a matter of conjecture as whether or not it took place.

I could even end up speaking to the leader of the SWAT team. Shocked

I'll have to think of an imaginative reason for not going out - masquerading as a female to guide in a SWAT team in a kidnap rescue could confuse my mother.

I'll award myself two brandies for that call.

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 9:32 pm

GP, you don't go anywhere on Wednesday Laughing

By the way, Sh0rty's picture made me wonder if he actually thinks you are a transvestite or something else that would please his sophisticated taste Shocked

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 10:00 pm

I won't speak to him again before Wednesday as I can't take any more of his interminable questions about the layout of this house I've never seen. Which is why I always have to talk to him in my underwear in a small cupboard (not in real life) which is hardly credible to anyone with normal brain function.

I've got to reply back about his photograph, which is really quite spooky and I'll ask why he looks so young (and handsome puke

).

Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 10:10 pm

thought I would add a little something Wink

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 10:38 pm

You should tell your mother the truth, Gomer.

"Sorry, Mum, I'm afraid I won't be able to make it on Wednesday."
"Oh?"
"Yes, I've got a very, very, short man I've got to talk to while in my underwear in the cupboard."
"You don't have to make up these crazy stories, Sonny. I understand.
You don't have to lie to your Mum. We'll just go out another night, ok?"
Laughing

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