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notobescammed
Radio Man
Joined: 03 Jun 2007
Posts: 878
Location: Behind the Microphone...
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 6:27 pm |
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For this weeks show, I am going to attempt to be a human soundboard using only lines posted below when talking to the scammers...
Therefore a soundboard has a limited number of lines to repeatedly use and I want you to post your funny and outrageous lines below to drive the lads crazy as I repeat myself over and over again...
Let's see how long they stay on the line for...
Tune in on Sunday to hear the results www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc
NTBS |
_________________ Listen to my show live every Sunday at 6pm UK, 1pm US! Just log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click listen live!
If you missed a show, or to listen to your favorite shows - log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click archived segments!
Internet's Biggest Conversation - Where Scammers are Scammed into reality Live!
you are trying to ask me if Iam a robber? is this correct? - Dr Usman
My own version meaning of the word (SCAM) {The Transaction you will start that will never end! - Kw3s1
Sometimes the truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off - Kw3s1
Birthday Safari - Co Bait with FrumpyBB and Redshoes17
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
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Donato
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jan 2007
Posts: 2922
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 6:58 pm |
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From my own insult asems... in no particular order (caps are mugu's not mine)
YOUR MAMA TOTO
You are Cursed by Heaven!!!
DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM
HAVE A NICE DAY MR NO BODY
YOU SHOULD GO BACK TO SCHOOL AND LEARN MORE
YOU ARE A SENSLESS HUMAN BEAN
STOP FOOLING UR SELF MAN
CHIEF BIG FISH
A MONKEY IMPREGNATED YOUR MOM
HELLO A$$HOLE
God Bless you
YOUR MAMA TASTES FINE
IDIOT RAT MAN LIKE YOU
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN USED AS STICK FOR PEGGING IN THE FARM. |
_________________ ^^^ damn tree hugging hippy. -imike
Your are a complete ASSHOLE!! Dont you dare mail me again BASTARD!!!-george harrison
- lots
<i><b>Free Pastor Frank!!!</b></i> |
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Bruce Banner
Master Baiter
Joined: 15 Jul 2008
Posts: 189
Location: On the run from General Ross
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 7:05 pm |
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"What?"
"Hello, Delores!"
"Delores, just listen to me." |
_________________ x6 x3 :S. Korea: x1 x1 x1 x1 |
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SlapHappy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 7:15 pm |
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"Hello, this is RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRANDY Oldman, amd I have just sent my payment to YOU!" |
_________________ x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
x10 X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
(19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
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Mugatu
** Retired **
Joined: 13 May 2007
Posts: 3773
Location: The star of India
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 7:28 pm |
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When I'm talking to an agitated lad, I find that his most common words are likely to be "Okay" and "Listen".
I.e:
Quote: |
Okay okay okay... Listen listen listen listen listen! |
You'll no doubt know this from your hundreds of annoyed lad calls. So I suggest a big button that says "listen" and a big button that says "Okay" and you can hammer away all day.... in fact you and your lad can have a little competition as to who can shout it the most. |
_________________ - because you deserve them! x19
Thinking of using phone modalities? Attend the 419eater university on audio baiting.
"They made me to understand you are a Fraud Star" - Ikenna.
"I like traveling very much, it is so exciting and interesting to see foreign countries. but I have never been to foreign countries." - Marina.
"I will have you now I am highly reputable businness magnet." - Pam Doh
"Sorry,i do not know you are all that: a destitute and nuts" - Ben Chris |
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Worf
Elite Baiter
Joined: 27 May 2007
Posts: 1690
Location: Florida - it's hot down here
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 9:35 pm |
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"I am the atomic powered robot. Please give my best wishes to everybody!"
"He's dead, Jim."
"We've got to close the beaches!"
eta: Oh, did you just mean lad lines, or anything? |
_________________ "Honey there no way to go out side camp without peppers and passport." - M1racle Y0rm1e
"Either you are lying or you are not telling the truth here, buddy." - H4rrison Ford (the lad, not the actor of course)
"you are an embodiment of permanent failure, an epitome of misfortune of life . . . a disgrace to your generation" - Lambert Lee
= Rev. Michael Jeans - Dakar to Ziguinchor
= Rev. Michael Jeans - Dakar to St. Louis, Senegal (co-bait with OxygenDeprived)
= Mattar - Abidjan, Ivory Coast to Accra, Ghana
= Stanley, co-bait with VDJ, Gadget and Jayhawk - Aba to Benin City
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Spudz
Elite Baiter
Joined: 22 Nov 2006
Posts: 1173
Location: --4--
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 10:15 pm |
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From the Duke Nukem sound board
"I've got balls of steel"
that gets really really annoying! |
_________________ Javed Main:I received your e-mail message but cannot read very well due to the injection I took last night/Please for Gods sake i would'nt like you to address my bank as feck/You are a priest and you are bold enough to tell me that you took 3 bottles of the finest whiskey/Please i am not ready to take more of your insult.
NIGERIA HE GOAT
IF YOU EVER SEND THIS TYPE OF THINGS TO MY EMAIL;; I WILL SHOW MY SELF TO YOU BASTAD NIGERIA HE GOAT....F*CK OFF AND DIE OF UNGER
YOU ARE SUCH A NONENTITY, I NEVER KNEW PEOPLE LIKE YOU STILL IN EXISTENCE. WHAT AN INGLORIOUS BASTARD ARE YOU?
x 10-2x33/8 you do the hokey cokey and you turn around and that's what it's all about |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Fri Sep 05, 2008 10:48 pm |
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From the old Goon Show:
"Before we start, are there any further questions?"
"What's become of that crispy bacon we had before the war?" |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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SlapHappy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 12:30 am |
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From the old Honeymooners show, with Jackie Gleason:
"Do you wanna go to the moon, Alice?!!" One more word, Alice, just one more word...BANG! ZOOM! Right to the moon! "
EDIT: here's another one...
"I sent you your money for my pink pony. Now, where the hell is it!!??" |
_________________ x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
x10 X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
(19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
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Shagnasty
Wannabe Baiter
Joined: 16 Jun 2007
Posts: 81
Location: On a learning curve.
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 3:49 pm |
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You did not go to school very well. |
_________________ I guess you will no apologise, so I will try and forget the insults. I am a businesmen, and so I am try to make money, and forget personal. G*@rge Schr4nn3r
You can't cheat an honest man, never give a sucker an even break, and never wise up a chump. WC |
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Connie L. Gus
Moderator
Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 7243
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:43 pm |
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What's up doc?
What a maroon.
Free your mind.
Whoa...dejavu.
You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.
What we've got here is failure to communicate.
Show me the money!
As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again. |
_________________ x8
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
-a few,
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
I am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate |
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Anti-419
Elite Baiter
Joined: 28 Jul 2004
Posts: 1804
Location: Bay Area, CA
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:50 pm |
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You are still a small boy mugu.
Your mama's toto smells like a dead goat.
Stupid mugu...I chopped your dolla!
Hello stupid....hello stupid....hello stupid...
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_________________ Barr Marc Hycinth: "I HATE HOW MY NAME IS BEEN RUBISHED AT THE CASHING OFFICE TODAY."
Safari Lad: "...your mails are a healing balm to my condiction here."
Jeremiah Nnamani: "With you I wouldn't mind being a fool for the rest of my life."
James Bruce: "Thanks for your mail and also your insult to my personality and company."
Baiting Record:
Trophies - 128 | 4 AM Airport Taxi - 6
- Sierra Leone to Nigeria - "...please help me ,you brought me here to NIgeria.take me out."
x14 |
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FrumpyBB
Baiting Guru
Joined: 22 Nov 2006
Posts: 5988
Location: Germany
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 6:20 pm |
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"Where did you find my private email?"
"Why do you think I am the right person?"
"Why do you need a foreign partner?"
"Shut up! Listen to me!"
"I want to speak to the man next to you."
"Do you have a wife?"
"Please repeat this sentence."
"Can you go somewhere with less background noise?"
"This is very interesting - but I donĀ“t want to do anything illegal."
"I think you are not serious with this transaction."
"Time is not our friend, you know."
"Does your boss agree to this business suggestion?"
"I advise you to do this immediately."
"You are delaying things."
"I will pray for a speedy transaction."
"I understand this is urgent business, very very urgent."
"My lawyer will call you, Dr. Oscomby ter Stivi. Please repeat his name : Oscomby ter Stivi."
"I am not happy about this delay."
"What is MTCN again?"
"Why Western Union?"
"I do not write you an email, I am calling you, you wanted me to call you."
"Why is this so urgent?"
"Is this legal?"
"Is it 100% risky-free?"
"Why this question?"
Great idea, Dan |
_________________ SIR,I DON'T ENTERTAIN RIGMAROLE AND THERE IS NO ROOM FOR DILLY- DALLY.
the ball is in your cult
x 5 ARK & Co. incl. 1 safari w/ RS17 & NTBS
Dan the lotto man, ARK mugu wedding
Dennis the hitman, co-bait w/ Murry Guru
Zake (w/ SH, SL & Craig)
x 5 Modeling Mugu Meeting, w/ mewing_ghecko & Otterfan & SSC
x 2 another MMM w/ SH
x 13 Later shows and trips for the benefit of M00seknuckle, incl. the 0budu Fact Finding Mission
Come to our Eater University Baiting Tutorials Cos you deserve it. x5 x50+ x 4 -- |
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SlapHappy
Baiting Guru
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 7:19 pm |
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"Hello, this is Santa Claus. What do you want me to bring you for Christmas?"
"There so many...How will he ever pick a few lines for his show?"
edit... |
_________________ x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
x10 X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
(19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
Last edited by SlapHappy on Sun Sep 07, 2008 1:55 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ari
Elite Baiter
Joined: 17 Sep 2004
Posts: 1269
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 8:46 pm |
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And speaking of Italy and sports cars that I stole there, you still owe me a yellow Porsche.
I prefer brunettes.
We're a bit sensitive to blood around here. I'm sure you can understand that.
I don't have any leeches on my speed dial.
I'm really glad Edward didn't kill you. Everything's so much more fun with you around.
Here's the thing... I've already gone crazy once. I know what my limits are.
I never thought I needed to teach you how to throw a punch. Guess I was wrong about that.
You aren't exactly the best judge of what is or isn't dangerous.
It's the thought that counts. I ought to know.
Do you think either of them would give up if you died? They'd still fight, we all would. You can't change anything, so just be good, okay?
I was just wondering why you stabbed him. Not that I object.
I can't imagine how awful that must feel. Being normal? Ugh.
Quite a pity how things turned out, isn't it?
Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?
You're awfully small to be so hugely irritating.
Over my pile of ashes.
I'd like to beat you dead.
I'll kill you myself! I'll do it now! |
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Mugatu
** Retired **
Joined: 13 May 2007
Posts: 3773
Location: The star of India
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Posted:
Sat Sep 06, 2008 10:19 pm |
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All lines I have used in phone calls while baiting as my favourite bait character, Pat Bateman:
I saw the acclaimed New York musical, "Oh Africa, Brave Africa". It was.. a laugh riot.
I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?
Listen, you'll have to excuse me. I have a lunch meeting with Cliff Huxtable at the Four Seasons in 20 minutes.
You're f***ing me and we don't have plans tonight. What could you possibly be doing?
Why don't you get a job? If you're so hungry, why don't you get a job?
I have to return some videotapes.
I need to engage in homicidal behaviour on a... uh... massive scale. It cannot be corrected but I have no other way to fulfill my needs.
I'm into... well, murders and executions mostly.
And see if you can get this one in without laughing. I managed it in a phone call to my "Barrister" a few months back, I thought that if I was paying him to be my personal Barrister, he'd better know what he let himself in for:
Quote: |
Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, meet me at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open. |
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_________________ - because you deserve them! x19
Thinking of using phone modalities? Attend the 419eater university on audio baiting.
"They made me to understand you are a Fraud Star" - Ikenna.
"I like traveling very much, it is so exciting and interesting to see foreign countries. but I have never been to foreign countries." - Marina.
"I will have you now I am highly reputable businness magnet." - Pam Doh
"Sorry,i do not know you are all that: a destitute and nuts" - Ben Chris |
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redshoes17
Elite Baiter
Joined: 28 Feb 2007
Posts: 1731
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Posted:
Mon Sep 08, 2008 4:01 am |
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Sorry I found this thread too late.
I would quote the 118th Psalm, "This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it." I really should have thought of quoting this to willy when he was suffering from malaria. |
_________________
Willy Accra to Abuja to Maiduguri
Floyd Lagos to Abeche with reaper
Dan Benin City to Lagos
ARK Tamale to Kumasi
x41
I don't need you alone for sex. w1l13
i was ashamed this money money was not in the system when we got there to cash it,it made me and my family lawyer look like little children Godwin
'because no one want your progress not every one want your goat to give birth to twins as the man who see tomorrow told me when i visit him in the shrine Godwin
i was rubbed by rubber last friday, they collectted all my money and my phones. |
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notobescammed
Radio Man
Joined: 03 Jun 2007
Posts: 878
Location: Behind the Microphone...
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Posted:
Mon Sep 08, 2008 11:56 am |
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^^^^^^Better late than never Redshoes!!
With the success of the human soundboard on yesterday's show.... (Despite technical difficulties)
This will become a regular feature to torture the lads... We had some pretty colourful responses yesterday and i'm sure plenty more to come!
Keep your one-liners for the soundboards coming....
NTBS |
_________________ Listen to my show live every Sunday at 6pm UK, 1pm US! Just log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click listen live!
If you missed a show, or to listen to your favorite shows - log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click archived segments!
Internet's Biggest Conversation - Where Scammers are Scammed into reality Live!
you are trying to ask me if Iam a robber? is this correct? - Dr Usman
My own version meaning of the word (SCAM) {The Transaction you will start that will never end! - Kw3s1
Sometimes the truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off - Kw3s1
Birthday Safari - Co Bait with FrumpyBB and Redshoes17
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
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dagget
Master Baiter
Joined: 10 Nov 2006
Posts: 242
Location: Melbourne, Australia
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Posted:
Tue Sep 09, 2008 1:30 am |
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Couple of favourites...
But you forget Peter, I was present at an underwater unexplained mass sponge migration
Let history never forget the name Enterprise
I'm on the run from the Fascist police with a murderer, a mass murderer and a man in a bri-nylon shirt
I am and always will be your friend. |
_________________ I DONT KNOW YOU
USE THE MONEY TO BUY COFFIN. " ASEM lad
Have i scammed you once,instead you are the one scamming us here now....Send the money animal.
PLEASE TAKE CAER OF YOUR SELF OR I SEND TO YOU F.I.B ?
X24 1 X 2.5 years |
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Titania
Hell on wheels
Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 2442
Location: Rollin' rollin' rollin'
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Posted:
Tue Sep 09, 2008 4:33 am |
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We're from the government. We're here to help you.
Is it safe? |
_________________ i do not know you.you need to expanciate more - C0llins W3aver
those words really made me felt completely bad..and i had to dust my ass and wipe tears Micheal David
x 8
Stanley's Christmas Adventure 2008 - Lagos to Abuja - massbait |
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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 17388
Location: Leading my wolf pack
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Posted:
Tue Sep 09, 2008 12:42 pm |
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When I reach for my revolver I hear the word 'culture.
You know it's true what they say; no man is an island. But if you tie a bunch of dead guys together they make a pretty good raft.
How many nuns would a nunchuck chuck if a nunchuck could chuck nuns?
Rubber macfisheries rapid plug underwear emulsion sick custard... machine wrapped with butter.
The only Emperor is the Emperor of Ice Cream.
The Hunchback will have something to say about this!
Sometimes when it's cold outside I like to pretend I'm a bottle of shampoo.
That's what they should have told the hypnotherapist, and look what happened when they didn't...
I had no shoes, and I was feeling sorry for myself. But then I saw a man with no feet... So I took his shoes. I mean, he didn't need them any more, right?
And for those wondering what all that was about... Max Geldray will now play a loaded sackbut from the kneeling position. |
_________________ Son of a bitch!!! Your dead!!! Everything about your stinking poor life is dead!!! Get off my way you son of a bitch mother ....a man without father bastard....your dead Ok
May you never se the end of the year, May you sick and die in JESUS NAME AMEN.
MARK MY WORD, YOU SHALL FALL SICK, IF YOU DONT PLEASE WITH ME, YOU SHALL DIE OF THE SICKNESS, THIS IS MY FINAL WORD TO YOU
I HAVE PLACED YOU UNDER MY ORACLE GODS,
YOU SHALL CRY AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS OR YOU DIE
x5 x2 x 246
x 5 - Oyenka Chidinma Lagos-Cotonou; Dickyboi Lagos-Accra; Femmy Lagos-Porto Novo; "Woody" Accra-Singapore; Henry Philip Abuja-Natitingou w/MG & DSW
x 7 |
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