Best. Email. Ever.

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Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:25 pm

I'm baiting a cheque lad and, after months of him trying to get his 'hard earned' money, his only option was to report me to his spiritual leader. Naturally I figured he wouldnt go through with it and laughed off his threats; even informing him that lad that we in the USA simply do not believe in such hokum. However, he sure showed me Shocked

. I checked my inbox today to find this little beauty:

Quote:

LERTER FORM NKUJA BROTHERS FRATERNITY SECRET SOCIETY IN THE KINGDOM OF DARKNESS

Vodahuu Ahuu

This letter is from NKUJA BROTHERS FRATERNITY SECRET SOCIETY IN THE KINGDOM OF DARKNESS.

In our last gathering one of our honorable members Kiev Vincent repoted your case to this great society and your name was immediately registerd in our black judgement book.

Based on the central tenets of our spiritual operation,it it a taboo and against our spiritual operation to lounch an attack on the individual who complaints has been laid upon without first of all registering his or her name in our black judgment list which within this period provides day of mercy fo the accused to take a restitution .

After our days of mercy and it is spiritually establish that the accused has faild to take a restitution then we shall immediately strik with high spiritual voking power.

We operate with strong spiritual manipulation in high places all over the world and our major objectives is to provide pretction,success and revange for the honorable members of this great occultic soceity across the world.

As a leader of this great occult fraternity soceity,it is my duty to send to you a notice of warning to immediately adhere to the business terms and agreement you have with our honorable member Kiev Vincent or cleraly face one of the following adverse consequences depending according to the one Kiev Vincent wants us to invoke on you irrespective of where you are.

1 Either we inflict an incurable deseases on you through spiritual means.
2 Or invoking madness on you which no one will be able to trace the root.
3Or cause an exessive hardship to you through spiritual manipulation wich no amount of deliverance can provide a remedy.
4 finally terminating your existence in this wonderful world by our agents either physical or spiritual.

Kiev’s choice determines the way through which we are going to attack by our agents and spiritual forces of darkness from the above mentioned adversities.

A fly that refuses to here follows the dead body to the grave.

NB Nkuja Brotherhood secret society is one of the strongest occultic fraternity in the kingdom of darkness found in th 20th centuries with the sole aim of providing remedy to the plight of the honorable members with high spiritual force,agents and manipulation.

Membership are opened to the few capable individuals acrros the globe.

Vodahuu Ahuu

Which of the 4 options do you think he'll choose? jump_4_joy

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:33 pm

Quote:

2 Or invoking madness on you which no one will be able to trace the root.

What? And make you more mad than you already are???

Fabulous email! That is one for the hall of fame! Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 17 Sep 2004 Posts: 1269

Ask him if you can select your preferred method.

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:41 pm

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:44 pm

Quote:

A fly that refuses to here follows the dead body to the grave.

Can he choose to make you the fly?? Food for life!!

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:51 pm

Bwhaahaaahaahaaa!! Jesus .. you got yourself a real gem there ... great stuff !!! Thumbs up

Now what to choose .. they're all kind of appealing Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

Quote:

NB Nkuja Brotherhood secret society

It's not much of a secret if he goes around emailing strangers about it. Laughing

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 6:58 pm

So much siggy material, so little space. Thank you for making my day! Laughing

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 7:25 pm

^^^^ Made my day too Tommo Laughing

, was having a bit of a dud until that email turned up Smile

Master Baiter Joined: 17 Jul 2008 Posts: 101

I'd ask if you can join up, seeing how membership is open to a few across the globe.

Sounds like my kind of people.

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 7:53 pm

One of the best ever! Laughing

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:22 pm

I hope you don't mind FF, but I sent that out with slight amendment to a few lads from the GomerBoyz just to see what happened. Two replies already...

This one just replied in the subject heading...

Quote:

Hello I get odechi, Odechi dey inside me , Send me the follow up of your fm

Second one...

Quote:

Mr G0mer,

Nobody far when doing business so any physical or spiritual or what ever i don't care because i am prepared in this business so my dear i will advice you to minus treating in this we are doing the same this not the way to handle things meanwhile what i can do not in fear or any thing is for you to tell mugu to send some to me and send some to you that is the only way out or we both lose since you use NKUJA is an igbo name i know and IMO state for that mater and that my state but in case of another person don't treat because you can not do ok you don't know where i am just go ahead and tell him as i said just said or i call him on phone now am waiting for your reply and his own too.

SANG

Not sure what either of them are saying.

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:27 pm

Reply to him asking how he'd do those things, and ask exactly they'll kill you spiritually. Cool

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:54 pm

Tell him you are disappointed he will chose only ONE option... You want all 4...

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:37 pm

That may be one of the funniest ones yet. Someone has the mentality of a 6 year old. (No offense to any 6 year olds out there)

Quote:

After our days of mercy and it is spiritually establish that the accused has faild to take a restitution then we shall immediately strik with high spiritual voking power.

I like this line a lot. Voking power.

I am at work and just had a laughing fit. There should have been a warning on this one. Diet coke came out my nose.

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:40 pm

I appreciate the creativity on the part of the lad.

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:43 pm

Now that is truly amazing... Is you Defence Against Dark Arts training up to speed?

Tell them that the Loom of Fate has selected them for termination and the Fraternity always gets its targets (those who've seen Wanted will know what I mean)

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 12:22 pm

Hilarious!

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 12:26 pm

I thought maybe I'd suggest adding a few new methods, maybe give some examples, and see how receptive they'd be. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 12:28 pm

But I'll keep my hands off. Mad

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 12:50 pm

That is LAD-TASTIC!

I do see a new church in the making though...

NKUJA BROTHERS FRATERNITY SECRET SOCIETY IN THE KINGDOM OF DARKNESS

We so desperately need this to be a baiting site. Laughing

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:55 pm

That lad is a real gem! Don't lose him Very Happy

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:17 pm

Can you make a donation to the Kingdom before your unfortunate demise?? Shocked

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:34 pm

I HAD to Google that name. Looks like they've already made it to the big screen! Soon appearing at your local drive-in:

http://vinammovies.com/product_catalog/product_profile/,6991.html

Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 4:36 pm

veruca41 wrote:

I HAD to Google that name. Looks like they've already made it to the big screen! Soon appearing at your local drive-in:

http://vinammovies.com/product_catalog/product_profile/,6991.html

LOL! And I thought the lads were being original and made it up themselves. Buuuu!