Jump In! Rev. David is inviting us to a Nigerian conference

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Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2008 3:23 pm

Lazy f'cker won't pick me up in Cotonou and there's me in a wheelchair (sorry, but he did say "mobile no")...get the bus he says. And come to think of it he was going to send me details of the hotel.

I'm trying to be a nice middle-aged spinster but I think he needs a slap?

As I'm quite new to all this, suggestions most welcome! And would be happy to tie in with what others are doing to him.

Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2008 3:27 pm

tell him your private jet cannot get clearance to land in Lagos. And your personal driver doesn't have an international drivers license.

The smell of money should pique his interest.

Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2008 5:26 pm

If you want a serious answer about visas, you need to contact the consulate for the country you're visiting. Nigeria should have a consulate in most large cities.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 30 Jul 2008 Posts: 27

I emailed him saying I was visiting a former business associate at the college when I met mr brown, and that I would be interested in going and that I already had my visa, and he said great ask mr brown how he was gettin down there, and I replied back "I was under the impression that that air expenses were paid for, correct me if I am wrong" and see where that gets me.

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 3:25 am

I just wanted to say thank you for the work done already. Rev. David's messages have been getting shorter, and he's showing signs of frustration. Although still polite, he send me one message which was written entirely in capital letters. Red started to get cold feet, and the Rev. became much more positive again until Red re-committed. We're definitely having an effect.

I asked him for a prayer to Saint Christopher, the patron saint of travelers. Here is what the Rev. wrote back:

Quote:

Greetings
May God grant you journey mercy and may he lead your way to the Event venue in jesus
christ Name.Amen.
We are still praying for you and the trip,see you this week,
David

Now Red doesn't read all that well, but he is fairly certain that Saint Christopher failed to make an appearance.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 30 Jul 2008 Posts: 27

wonder what hes gonna do when he shows up at the airport at 5:30 in the morning to find out im not there Laughing

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 5:28 am

The phone number was no good! I guess that he just won't get Red's change of flight information...

Oh well, keep it up, gang. Keep the pressure up. By the time that the conference is due to begin on Wednesday, he should be wigging out.

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:42 pm

Has anyone yet figured out what his scam angle is?

Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:51 pm

I suspect that Reverend David means to do nasty things to me after I get into his car. Extortion, identity theft, slavery, exploitation, and ransom are all possibilities. Ransom would be easiest and the most rewarding.

I saw a documentary recently about kidnapping as a training method. North Koreans reportedly kidnapped Japanese citizens for study so that spies from North Korea could speak more convincingly as Japanese. Theoretically, a gang of spammers could use a captive westerner to help them scam more effectively. Something like this would be almost certainly too ambitious for a spammer, but I thought it was a worth mention.

Abduction -- that's my educated guess.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 30 Jul 2008 Posts: 27

not sure, I told him that I was gonna raise money to help youth youths start their own business, that I had $6000 bucks raised, but that I could get 15 if he sent me a sign holding the Name of my business (bnwnd by cwbyp) but he refused, said he couldnt do a sign, but sent me a pic of some respectable black dude instead, and when I asked again said he still couldnt do it but looked forward and greatly pleased to meet me at 5:30 in the morning his time at the airport. though ive noticed each email gets progressively shorter, like hes having less time to email them. still friendly though, i wonder how much that will change come 5:30 in the morning when he finds out my friends personal jet had a hydraulics malfunction on takeoff forcing us to make an emergency landing. Wink

so I really have no idea, abduction sounds like a good theory, cuz he didnt seem interested in more money, or maybe hes just content at 6000. . .

Posted: Tue Aug 12, 2008 4:38 pm

I got a pic too, and he's going to meet me at Lagos airport (couldn't get the sod to fetch me from Cotonou, but I think I'll stay in my luxury hotel a little longer).

I assume this is the same guy others have had...(maybe without the caption Wink

)

Given that I have only just been arsed to read his mail, and he originally said he was leaving for the conference on Tuesday morning (shame...tis Tuesday afternoon already) I assume he won't now pick me up at the airport, but, hey, I guess if he says he will, then he's a lying 'ted or he'll have to drive back from Aba or whatever-70s-pop-group he's into. Actually, just noticed his mail was timed at 14:41 and since his ip address is exactly the same as his first mail, he LIED!!! What a big f*cking surprise!

He gave me a phone no as well, but there's no way I'm going to call him! Sorry, not this early in my baiting career!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 30 Jul 2008 Posts: 27

yeah i got the same photo cept it was a little bigger and darker. Very Happy

Posted: Wed Aug 13, 2008 10:55 pm

Red missed his connecting flight in Paris. Apparently, someone's jet had hydraulics problems and kept poor Red stranded on the runway. I haven't heard back from the Rev yet. Has he written to anyone else since we were supposed to start arriving?

Posted: Thu Aug 14, 2008 7:43 am

Yeah, I heard from him again yesterday after the mail with the photo (above).

I'm staying in Cotonou but continually having problems with getting transport to Lagos where he says he'll pick me up. I was supposed to arrive there Tuesday at 3pm, but now he says he'll wait (he did originally say to me he was leaving for the conference Tuesday am; Nigeria is on the same timezone as the UK - I mean Benin - so its easy to work out the "when" of everything!)

Well, I'm not shifting my butt from the poolside...if he wants me, he'll have to come get me...

I only get a chance to check my mails after work -oops I mean after I've finished topping up the tan in Benin - , so not for another 7 hours...

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 10:39 am

I haven't heard from David in a few days now. Reportedly, Red is back in Paris after being turned away by airport security in Lagos. He thought he was hiring a body guard from that escort service, but instead a little woman showed up who stole his visa. It turns out that he needed that thing. Currently, he is attempting to teach confidence and public speaking skills to the mimes.

Did anyone hear from David after the conference? It might be time for me to retire this character and switch to another...

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 11:13 am

I did get another mail from David saying the conference had finished successfully or something like that (I'm at work and can't access my mails for an exact quote). Also, when he nearly-again-but-in-the-end-didn't pick me up, he suggested that I could keep e-mailing him as a friend ( Shocked

). Not done so yet though; mainly cos I'm juggling a very full mailbox from the recent shuttle.
Still, he's there waiting to be mailed...

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 4:47 pm

@everyone!

This just in; the money shot...

Let the games begin...

Hello
How are you doing and how is life over there?the Youth convention
went well and we really experienced God in it.I will Love to know if
you could be of Help to me.We need some financial problem now and i
am praying that the Lord touches you to help and if you cant that's
still ok.
Know that we are building Gods kingdom here on earth. Many do not
know when to stop praying over issues because they are not sensitive
to recognize signs indicating that the prayer is heard. Jesus says we
should watch and pray. Some of us are still busy fasting and praying
over matters God has since answered, rather than preparing for the
manifestation. Ask God to make you more sensitive to the Spirit. When
you pray, open your heart and spirit to the Holy Spirit.
Have a Great day and i anticipate your Reply.
David

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 5:29 pm

He emailed me and said the conference was a great success.

Quote:

Hello
The Convention Ended Today and its been a Great time for the African Youths.I will Love you to still send anything you can,we will appreciate it.
David
i will share the Reports to you soon

I offered to send frozen pizzas, but he prefers money.

and the next email:

Quote:

I am happy hearing from you,the Youths deals on many issues Affecting Africa and its regions and prayers were said to bring God into helping the African political issues,We are Glad that the number was close to 100 people and next year we expect to have more people in attendance.
Well you can send foods that cant perish or you may leave it til next year.But can you help em with funds?after funding the youth program i have nothing left.If you can please do if you cant just dont borther

Of course he first must send me 2 forms of ID. Then I will have many long forms that must be completed.

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 9:19 pm

Whoop, there it is! Revy David sent me the same hook, just like a good little lad. Interestingly, his wording was different from what he send to you guys. Doesn't he know how to cut and paste?

Quote:

Hello I am Doing Great and God is lifting me up daily.I am so sorry for what you said you experience and i think its because you didn't connect with me for Direction.Well i am not sure you wanted to come,But all is well.Could you help me with some help?i wish you all the best over there. Many do not know when to stop praying over issues because they are not sensitive to recognize signs indicating that the prayer is heard. Jesus says we should watch and pray. Some of us are still busy fasting and praying over matters God has since answered, rather than preparing for the manifestation. Ask God to make you more sensitive to the Spirit. When you pray, open your heart and spirit to the Holy Spirit.
David

This guy just doesn't quit, even after being stood up -- how many times? Red sent him to the airport twice.

He didn't ask for anything specifically, so Red offered to send him a Western Union money order from Paris -- if he can reach Red by phone at my Parisian hotel. I provided the hotel name and address but no the phone number. Otherwise, he'll have to wait for Red to get back home to Kentucky.

Red does work at the athletics department of a university. Perhaps I should try that scholarship modality.

Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 9:42 pm

Go for it !! remember to use the baiter tracking sites as a last resort. dud MTCNs and scans will be more than enough for him now.

Good Luck

Not quite a Newb Joined: 30 Jul 2008 Posts: 27

yeah I emailed him (after the convention was over) explaining my friends personal jet had hydraulic problems, so he emailed me back saying that it went well and that Gods work was done etc. etc. and then asked for financial support. lol I asked when the next one was Wink

Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 3:05 am

Just got this from the pastor...is it just me or is this getting weird..

Quote:

Hello
you can help me with Funds and if you do i will really Love it,Thanks
David

Of course I need more details..

Quote:

I can imageing the love you will have of the funds. Please describe how you will love it when I send funds and what you will do with them.

Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2008 2:44 am

Finally he gets to it, just a beggar.

Quote:

Hello
thats Great to hear,i want some Cloths and 200 dollars to settle the bills for the Convention.If you can help me out that will be Great.
God be with u
David

--- On Sat, 8/23/08, director: Kellman Smith <[email protected]> wrote:

> From: director: Kellman Smith <[email protected]>
> Subject: Re: conference
> To: [email protected]
> Date: Saturday, August 23, 2008, 8:29 PM
> Listen David, We were quite enthuesed about your convention.
>
> however we asked some very simple questions about african
> clothing.
> You seemed to be to busy to answer my questions so we
> helped an
> orphanage in Kandi instead. We are building them a new
> school house
> and playground I dont know what you are asking, you never
> get to
> the point
>
> Kellman Smith.
>
> On Wed, 20 Aug 2008 07:01:13 -0700 pastor david Amaji
> <[email protected]> wrote:
> >Hello
> > How are you doing and how is life over there?the
> Youth
> >convention went well and we really experienced God in
> it.I will
> >Love to know if you could be of Help to me.We need some
> financial
> >problem now and i am praying that the Lord touches you
> to help and
> >if you cant that's still ok.
> >Know that we are building Gods kingdom here on earth.
> Many do not
> >know when to stop praying over issues because they are
> not
> >sensitive to recognize signs indicating that the prayer
> is heard.
> >Jesus says we should watch and pray. Some of us are
> still busy
> >fasting and praying over matters God has since
> answered, rather
> >than preparing for the manifestation. Ask God to make
> you more
> >sensitive to the Spirit. When you pray, open your heart
> and spirit
> >to the Holy Spirit.
> >Have a Great day and i anticipate your Reply.
> >David
> >
> >
> >--- On Fri, 8/1/08, director: Kellman Smith
> ><[email protected]> wrote:
> >
> >> From: director: Kellman Smith
> <[email protected]>
> >> Subject: conference
> >> To: [email protected]
> >> Date: Friday, August 1, 2008, 12:41 PM
> >> Dear Reverend David,
> >>
> >> We were hoping that our delegate could attend your
> >> conference. Mr.
> >> Brown one of our business associates gave us your
> email.
> >>
> >> I am the Director of Investments for a group
> that is
> >> interested in Africa. We are currently scheduling
> a trip to
> >> either
> >> Benin, Nigeria or Liberia. We will be staying at
> one of the
> >>
> >> beatiful Safari
> >> camps. But we hear there is trouble in LIberia so
> we just
> >> chose
> >> Benin.
> >> We are very busy right now boxing up the
> customary
> >> gifts,
> >> laptops, phones and Rolex watches, for the
> businessmen we
> >> will
> >> meet. Of course we are worried about our security
> because
> >> we are
> >> carrying the funds for the investments.
> >> I dont know how much help I can be to you as
> we are
> >> traveling
> >> to Africa next week looking for investments.
> >>
> >> Kellman Smith
> >> director; Africa Investments Division
> >>

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 12:53 am

Quote:

We need some
> financial
> >problem now

Give him what he wants Twisted Evil

Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2008 2:34 am

I think I am onto something here he is well off script now...

Quote:

Hello
The Fund will Go along way to help me and the Ministry.In settling some bills i inure during the Meeting and to pay the pastors that works with me.If you are touched please do something.
David

Quote:

This sounds ignoble, I assume even god himself has funds that he needs to cover and bills. Show me the bills and i will pay them and yes i enjob being touched.

Quote:

Hello
How do u want me to show you the bills,this is Money i collected or loaned from people for the Event.So if you want to help please do.
David

Quote:

Please send me copies of the bills and invoices and I can forward them to the accounts payable section with our orgaisation. If these are legitimate expenses then we can pay them off against tax as my organisation is a charity and we are coming to the end of the finacial year and have to use up some of our budget.

Quote:

Hello
I will scan the Copies and send them to you probably by tommrrow.
God bless you
David

Quote:

That sounds great I will organise our accounts payable to be ready to make good on payments. We do this sort of thing alot to hep out charitable organisations so I will talk to our chief accountant and get the procedures ready and the limits of payments. From memory we can pay up to $10 000 per transaction without going to the board but I will check for you.

Sounds oh so simple...but I can see problems aplenty, does that invoice include tax? what is the charity number? Perhaps he needs to be a member to claim the cash? A visit from Mr Gomer perhaps, or a visit to our local mission centre in Chad..

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