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Baiting Guru Joined: 29 Jan 2008 Posts: 2531 Location: AU

Quote:

kelly: PLEASE DO EMAIL THE INFORMATIONS TO ME ASA ([email protected])
I WILL GET BACK TO YOU ASAP
me: wait
kelly: I HAVE TO GO NOW
OK I WILL WAIT
Sent at 1:27 PM on Wednesday
me: hold on still
i am going to need some more animals
kelly: JUST EMAIL ME WITH THE INFOS OK?
me: the director wants some large chickens for the bigger actors
kelly: AS I SAID,YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY IN $5000 FOR THE PAPER WORKS
me: i thought you said we would fix this up now
kelly: YES BUT WE NEED THE MONEY FOR THE PAPER WORKS OF THESE ANIMALSOK?
me: you will get your money but you have not given me a total price yet
kelly: I SAID $25000.00
me: how can that be if the elephants are 15,000 each
sethbs75656m8o8o6m5wbsdtbh
sorry that was angus my weasel
kelly: $15000 PLUS $10000 FOR THE CROCODILES
IS THAT OK
SO GET BACK TO ME WITH THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIONS
me: and the 2 zebra and 4 cockatrice
kelly: YOUR FULL (details etc etc)
me: is it possible to hire the animals for the blue movie
we could film on your property where you keep the animals
kelly: THAT WILL BE OK BY ME
IF YOU WILL BE WILLING TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF THEM FOR ME OK?
SO HOW IS IT GOING TO WORK
?
JUST EMAIL ME ALL THAT OK?
I WILL BE WAITING FOR THAT
CALL ME 00237 9499 0335 FOR THAT I WILL BE WAITING FOR YOUR CALL ASAP FOR THIS IS ALOT OF MONEY
AND WE CANNOT JUST TALK THIS OVER THE NET
SO PLEASE CALL ME ASAP
I HAVE TO GO NOW OR EMAIL ME TO MY BOX!!
me: hang on
ewvjirrq3g0[q3hjg
jesus my animals are going crazy
ok i will mail you

Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 6:18 am

^^^^ Cockatrice porn... now this I have to see Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 29 Jan 2008 Posts: 2531 Location: AU

anyone want to call her as 1ucy P1nder.
I guess im going down the road of a blue movie on Kellys farm(or wherever she keeps her animals) I will of course be inviting her to star in the film

Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 7:09 pm

She seems a little overwhelmed... I informed her she missed the submission deadline for the photo contest and I get:

Quote:

Please do keep me inform Ok
I am so confuse now since i have so many animals that does not have a home.Can you please do me a favor by publishing my ads on the numerous pets websites that you know? I will reward you with an animal of your choice
Waiting to read from you

Man, if I didn't want to trigger the shutting of the email box, I have a mind to post her add on the most inappropriate sites! Twisted Evil

But no, instead I told her I can't own a little critter as I live in a strict apt complex. Crying or Very sad

But she got the offer to submit another photo for the cover!

Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 11:13 pm

^^Kelly also missed sending photos to packman and my zoo. Now s/he is playing nice, but s/he also forgot what animals we had ordered... Confused

I think that s/he didn't get the funds that s/he was hoping to get! Laughing

Awwww, too bad, now back to the run-a-round.

Posted: Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:27 am

I think Kelly is most definitely getting a bit frantic - not surprising when not a single zebra / cockatrice / unicorn / catbingo buyer has parted with a penny in payment yet.

She resurrected my original bait yesterday directing me to the "Ministry of Animals" or somesuch nonsense whereupon a hilarious exchange of email ensued with with Minister Mike Izzywizzy (well that's what I was calling him in the end) regarding him providing proof of a dung worm assay (yes kelly, I do want you to go rummaging around in zebra poop)

Posted: Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:18 pm

He just got in contact with me via Gmails chat features which I never knew exsisted!

Quote:

18:39 kelly: Hello
18:43 Hu: hi
18:44 kelly: WHY THE SILENCE ALL THIS WHILE? ARE YOU STILL INTERESTED IN THE ITEM?
Hu: yes, i am awaiting you to send CITES forms so i can forward with payment
18:45 kelly: THE CITES FORMS WILL BE COMING ALONG WITH THE ANIMALS OK?
Hu: My boss Mr. Nakamura insists to receive the forms first
18:46 he will then pay the $10,000
18:47 do you still have the blank forms i sent you?
they are to be filled out for Mr. Hiro Nakamura
18:48 kelly: CAN YOU PLEASE RESEND THE FORMS?
18:49 Hu: yes, one moment
is your email address still [email protected] ?
18:51 kelly: YES THAT IS MY EMAIL
Hu: ok, i only send pages 1, 2 and 6 of forms. i will fill in the rest.
18:52 kelly: PLEASE I WILL ADVICE YOU TO FILL YOUR PART AND FORWARD THE REST TO ME OK?
Hu: only part i need to fill in is declaration i received zebras. i will send a copy upon arrival
18:53 by the way, what are bank details for payment?
18:54 kelly: DO YOU HAVE A WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER STORE IN YOUR LOCATION?
Hu: no, but i have a friend in the city who does
18:55 western union is rare in china
kelly: WHAT ABOUT MONEY GRAM MONEY TRANSFER
Hu: no money gram in heilionjiang
kelly: WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
Hu: Heilionjiang, China
18:56 my friend, lives in major city. he can make payment on my behalf
kelly: YOU MUST HAVE WESTERN UNION
Hu: he has western union
he can relay MCTN
18:57 kelly: OK YOU WILL HAVE TO WIRE THE $10.000 WESTERN UNION OK?
18:58 Hu: yes, no problem
18:59 do zebras have tight snapper?
19:00 kelly: CAN I TALK TO YOUR BOSS?
19:01 Hu: he's on a business trip right now
but i can give you his email
19:02 kelly: I WILL LIKE TO HAVE YOUR FULL DELIVERY INFORMATIONS AND PHONE NUMBER WHERE THE ANIMALS WILL BE SHIPPED TO EMAILED TO ME RIGHT AWAY OK?
Hu: i can give you infromations now
19:03 Address is Heilionjiang Provincial Zoo, Heilionjiang, Pain Pavillion, China
Mr Nakamura's email address is [email protected]
kelly: YOU WILL HAVE TO EMAIL ME ALL THE INFORMATIONS PLUS THE FORMS OK
Hu: okay
19:04 i can get them to you tomorrow
but, please answer my question. do the zebra have tight snapper?
kelly: WHY NOT?
19:05 Hu: i do not understand
kelly: YES TO YOUR QUESTION!!
Hu: thats pretty bad
19:06 are they on medication for it?
19:07 kelly: SO MANY ZEBRAS HAVE THAT BUT I HAVE TREATED ALL OF MINE AGAINST THAT
Hu: can you forward me vetinary prescription?
19:08 kelly: I HAVE ALL THEIR VET PAPERS
WHAT WAS YOUR ORDER? INCLUDE THAT IN YOUR DELIVERY INFORMATIONS OK?
19:09 Hu: okay, i will need to confirm with Mr. Nakamura first
since long time love gone since we last spoke
but we will need vet paper saying they are safe off tight snapper
19:10 kelly: I SAID THEY ARE FREE FROM THAT OK?
Hu: for me, i am happy but Mr. Nakamura will need assurance
19:11 kelly: I AM WAITING FOR THE ORDERS ASAP WE ALSO NEED THAT FOR THE TRANSFER CERTIFICATE TO YOUR NAMES
19:12 Hu: k
19:13 kelly: I WILL BE WAITING FOR THAT ASAP
Hu: it will be tomorrow earlyest
Mr. Nakamura is in United Kingdom at moment
19:14 you may get faster reply if you email him and explain situation
19:15 I most leave, it is 1:00AM here. very sleep
Goodbye

I'm shocked, especially since my last email to him explained in detail why he was a complete moron who couldn't organise a pissup in a brewery.

Posted: Thu Jul 17, 2008 10:36 pm

Quote:

i have lots of your failing money transfers thanks when you get
serious do something serious.

Oh well,guess this means no Monty Python for J0hn H0lmes.I think I sent them to the MG store 4 times,with a couple others mis-spelled.
Time to wash,rinse,rebait

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 1:35 am

Quote:

sir,
we are sorry for the inconveniences we caused you ok?
we will like to have the list of items you bought from Mrs. Kelly
We can only provide you with the Vet paper work and you get the rest after you must have made the payment for it's the reason why we are keeping the animals.
Thanks and waiting to read from you

Look, another sex change!

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 5:46 am

She has even been lax in sending me me 1-60T H.E.R.P.E.S. form.

First her scanner is broken, then (after I told her to go to a cafe or a library or whatever) she told me:

Quote:

I AM UNABLE TO GO OUT DUE CUZ I AM A HANDICRAFT PERSON AND MY HUSBAND IS NOT AROUND

It's almost like she is baiting me..or perhaps lying! Shocked

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 2:27 pm

Well, gee, if she is a handicraft person, maybe she can make some accessories for your ... whatever it was you were looking for.

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 5:49 pm

^^^ I sent her my Herpetelogical Encephalopathic Reptillian Post-vaccination Empirical Sheet. The Form number is 1-60T. That's why it's my 1-60T H.E.R.P.E.S. Form

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 7:33 pm

I'm getting a kick out of Kelly of late! My photo editor baiter who works for a prestigious mag very well might get a photo after all! Very Happy

She missed the deadline for the zebra shot ... oh well. So I informed her about next months shot which involves a very very very rare animal!

Kelly

Quote:

Please do keep me inform Ok
I am so confuse now since i have so many animals that does not have a home.Can you please do me a favor by publishing my ads on the numerous pets websites that you know? I will reward you with an animal of your choice
Waiting to read from you

Me

Quote:

Well, I don't frequent pet websites as I live in an apartment and cannot own animals. But as I sit back and think about your situation $22,000 for a simple digital photo would help support a LOT of homeless animals! And perhaps, if you were able to submit it ahead of the deadline (so we weren't in such a rush to work it) I could convince K3ndr1c (baiter character's boss) to do an extra donation to your cause. Let me know. I'm off to the bank for Greenpeace's bank transfer, what a nice lady

Kelly

Quote:

Hello 3n Fu3g0,
I will highly appreciate any penny that you will offer as a
support for homeless animals.
Please let me know as soon as possible and what i should do for that.
Waiting to read from you

Me

Quote:

Similar to the first offer only with a different subject matter this time. We need a 8X11 color shot 200dpi to ensure reprintability as a cover submitted before the 15th of next month (earlier would be BETTER, and a pleased K3ndr1c might be coerrced into making an additional donation and a printed mention of your business in our magazine that reached thousands of animal lovers). The animal we need the photo of is the rare . This fox was recently discovered by Br4d Sh1v3rd0n up near Siberia, he lived long enough to report its existence, but vanished in a blizzard when his sled dog team went off track. So, his photos were lost, and no one knows what they look like. With your connections in the animal market as a rescuer, hopefully you will come across one, or know of a good photo. Once we have the accepted photo I can wire you the $22,000, more to follow if I can talk K3ndr1c into being a patron of yours. He's such an animal lover. Once more, it is only a digital photo we need, the file can be sent via email.

Kelly

Quote:

I WILL DO THAT ASAP OK?
I WILL LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU CAN HELP ME SALE MY ANIMALS?

Me

Quote:

Me personally, probably not. But if you can provide for us the cover shot we need, I'm fairly sure I could convince K3ndr1c to run you an add at no cost in our monthly issues. More exposure, means more contact from a wider clientel, including animal sanctuaries, zoos, and animal hospitals. That all hinges on making a successful submission. Remember: if I get the submission BEFORE the 15th of next month you will have more leverage with K3ndr1c.

Good luck! Hope to see the photo soon!

Kelly

Quote:

OK I WILL DO THAT BUT YOU WILL HAVE TO FIRST OF ALL PLACE ME SOME ADS IN ZOOS IN YOUR LOCATION BEFORE THE D DAY.
PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ASAP

"D DAY" Pbbbbbt! You owe me a keyboard lady!

Me

Quote:

I would if I could, but it is against our company policy. It would be looked upon as abusing my position of influence and could get me fired. I apologize, but the only media I am permitted to work with is the publications of "". I did speak with K3ndr1c this morning, and he informed me that if you were able to get us the photo before the due date of the 15th, as a favor to you he will give the usual $22,000, plus an additional $4,000 donation to your organization, and will do a spot add in the issue that would run 6X4 inches right beside the feature article. Normally, an add like this would cost, but he'll forgo the charge. All of this hinges on getting the acceptable photo ahead of time. If the submission date is the 15th you will only receive the $22,000 as per a normal cover deal.

Come on, Kelly, show us what this critter looks like! I'm curious! Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 1:19 pm

@shadow: You're being too kind to her. She responds well to gentle slaps.
Me:

Quote:

How are things progressing? Me and Mr. Nakamura are getting worried. Have the zebras died from tight snapper?

Kelly:

Quote:

WHO TOLD YOU THER ANIMALS HAVE THESE DESEAS ?

Me:

Quote:

Do you not remember our chat? You said you will send me the CITES forms and a vetinary certificate proving that they aren't sufferring from the disease. I have not received any of these and until then I will keep the $10,000 held within our bank account.
Also, for the love of God please stop being rude! If you continue to act like this I will go elsewhere for the animals even if it does cost more.

Kelly:

Quote:

SIR,
I AM SORRY IF I MADE YOU MAD OK?
I WILL GET BACK TO OU WITH THE PAPER WORKS TODAY.
SO PLEASE DO KEEP IN TOUCH
THANKS AND BYE FOR NOW

If she fails to produce a photo of your rare and beautiful creature, I'd recommend calling her a failure Wink

Elite Baiter Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 1407

I requested prices and delivery on a set of New Guniea Pigs (not to be confused with orginary guniea pigs). If she is out of those, I need a quote on some Giant Pigmy Mice.

My local PetSmart is out of stock of BOTH items. My daughters birthday is coming up soon.

Kelly better come through soon....

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 2:21 pm

kelly is so dumb, I baited the zebra semen line back in the early pages of this thread, it collapsed when kelly told me to fark off when i explained the pics he/she sent of the semen collection were infact a horse.

anyway I just went on Gmail, and the same address, and kelly was on chat, never twigged we already had like 40 emails between us! maybe kelly is run by several mugus?

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 2:22 pm

kelly is so dumb, I baited the zebra semen line back in the early pages of this thread, it collapsed when kelly told me to fark off when i explained the pics he/she sent of the semen collection were infact a horse.

anyway I just went on Gmail, and the same address, and kelly was on chat, never twigged we already had like 40 emails between us! maybe kelly is run by several mugus?

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 3:43 pm

lets see if we can get kelly to travel from Bamenda to yaounde

Tracking Number: XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Item: Electronics
Destination Address 1: C0mmercial Ave, Cameroon
Destination Address 2: Ya0unde Intern@tional Airport
Origin Location: Klam@th Falls, Oregon
Origin Date: 7/16/08
Estimated Delivery Date: 7/22/08
Status: Cleared Customs, awaiting pickup
Message: P@rcel Direct substation is located at freight gate G4

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 4:35 pm

Well whatever I ordered first fizzled out. Rinsing and repeating, this time for a mating pair of Karma Cameleons, preferably colored Soylent Green.

Has anyone tried the Tempest Transport modality on hm/her yet? I'm thinking when her breeding of the lizards doesn't work Rolling Eyes

, I will ship a stud Cameleon by Tempest along with the fee.

Elite Baiter Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 1407

Silly Kelly,

She has Guniea Pigs, but I asked for NEW Guniea Pigs. Larger and more agressive. About 25 Kilos each, and my daughter is going to race them.

She is going to have to get back with me.

No answer yet on my Giant Pygmy Mice.

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Sep 2004 Posts: 209

Rinse and repeat.
No learned Doctor this time, let's see how s/hes likes scamming small girls:

Quote:

Hi.
My name is Kylie ********.I will b 13 years oldin August and live in London England.
I was watching a aminal program on the TV last nite and it was all about CAPPUCCINO MONKIES and I thought they are such cute litle aminals I wouls <3 one as a pet!!!!!
So I used gogle and I found u are in Africa and u sell baby monkies. Do u have a Cappuccino Monkie u can sell me ? I woud call it Spank. Spank the Monkie, LOL!
Love Kylie
X

A few more emails and Kelly thinks young Kylie inherited some money when her Nan died, so:

Quote:

HELLO ONCE MORE AND THANKS FOR THE MAIL.
ALL YOU ARE TO PAY IS 650£ INCLUDING SHIPING FROM MY LOCATION CAMEROON.
SO I WILL NEED THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIONS FROM YOU...

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 6:22 pm

latest rounds of email from Kelly

Quote:

I ASKED YOU TO SEND THE PARCELS DHL

I do not have a DHL office near me. i do not understand why there is such difficulty with this business.

if you can not visit Y@ounde to collect the shipment, i will recall it and find someone else to do business with. this is becoming very dificult.

please tell me if you are not interested in continuing

Quote:

well if you fill that is best for you ,then go ahead and recall.
I have find out and there is a DHL in your location.Direct P@rcel is not in my location and to travel to Y@ounde,it will take me two days too and fro and i can't do that right now
So you will have to choose now!!!

I do not have a DHL near me. i do not understand where you get your information. it appears you are not serious about this so i will recall the shipment in the morning.

good day to you

Quote:

RECALL THEM AND FIND OUT IF IT'S POSSIBLE FOR THEM TO DELIVER THE ITEMS TO ME IN B@MENDA OK?

there is not an office in B@menda. the closest office is at the airport in Y@ounde. if you can not collect the shipment i have no choice.

does she truly think i care that it will take her 2 days to travel?

Elite Baiter Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 1407

mewing_ghecko wrote:

does she truly think i care that it will take her 2 days to travel?

Suggest she ride a zebra, they are faster than walking. And she has some extra due some people NOT PAYING... Laughing

Elite Baiter Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 1407

Here is the discussion between Kelly and myself thus far.

What other forms and documentation should I require. After all, no one wants their new pet to die.

I am in Blue
Kelly (scammer) in red

> Hello Kelly!!!
> I am very interested in buying some exotic animals from you. Although I
> would love a zebra, I am living in an apartment, and a zebra would not be
> suitable for my location.
>
> However, I am looking for a set of New Guniea Pigs, or a pair of giant pigmy
> mice.
> These are for my daughters birthday next month, and I would love to suprise
> her with the gift of an exotic animal.
> My local petstore PetSmart is currently out of stock, and I don't know where
> to turn. At PetSmart, New Guniea Pigs are around $450 each, and giant pigmy
> mice are $575 each. Are your prices comparable?
> Thanks,
> Mr. Soar Ashold

HELLO AND THANKS FOR THE MAIL.
YES I DO HAVE THEM AND THE PRICES REMAIN THE SAME.SO I WILL LIKE
TO KNOW IF YOU ARE TAKING THE PAIR OF GUINEA PIGS FOR $900 OR THE
PIGMY MICE FOR $1150.00.
I WILL NEED YOUR PHONE NUMBER SO THAT WE TALK THIS OUR OVER HE
PHONE OK FOR YOU CAN HAVE THEM TODAY
WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

Thanks for the prompt reply.
I am so excited. Now, I just want to confirm with you that these are NEW Guniea Pigs. Not to be confused with Guniea Pigs. These are larger, and somewhat more agressive. They each weigh about 25 kilos. My daughter is going to train them for racing.
These are New Guniea Pigs correct?
Also, you mentioned getting them today. I am not near LA. Are you going to hand deliver them? I am not sure I can take delivery today. But definatly on Friday.
Please advise.
Thanks,
Mr. Soar Ashold

HELLO ONCE MORE AND THANKS FOR THE MAIL.
YOU WILL HAVE TO PROVIDE ME WITH YOUR FULL DELIVERY INFORMATIONS AND PHONE NUMBER.AFTER THAT IS DONE,YOU WILL HAVE TO MAKE A DEPOSIT OF
$600.00 AND COMPLETE THE REST UPON DELIVERY . A DELIVERY AGENT WILL BE TAKING THE PAIR ALONG TO THE ADDRESS YOU ARE YET TO PROVIDE.
THANKS AND WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

I am in Seattle. My phone # is 206-426-1573. I will be in and out of the office. Just leave a message, as I had to fire my secretary. She was suffering from gross incontinence.
I am at 1743 S Horton St. $600 for a deposit seems resonable. Where should I send this deposit? I can get it in the mail today.
However, you didn't confirm if these are New Guniea Pigs. Also, I need to make sure they don't have any infections or mites. Will you be able to supply the proper documentation? The last time I tried to order New Guniea Pigs they arrived dead, as they were infected with tricynoses, the deadly swine virus.

Mr. Soar Ashold.

----- Original Message ----
From: kelly briete <[email protected]>
To: Soar Ashold <[email protected]>
Sent: Tuesday, July 22, 2008 2:53:03 PM
Subject: Re: Animals
HELLO ONCE MORE AND THANKS FOR THE MAIL.
YES THERE ARE NEW GUINEA PIGS
YOU WILL HAVE TO WIRE THE MONEY WESTERN UNION TO THE BELOW ADDRESS

RECEIVER'S FULL NAMES....................NKWENTI MIKE
COUNTRY................................................CAMEROON
ZIP CODE..................................................00237
STATE.......................................................LITTORAL
CITY...........................................................DOUALA
AMOUNT.....................................................$600
TEST QUESTION..........................................WHEN?
TEST ANSWER.............................................NOW
AFTER YOU MUST HAVE MADE THE PAYMENT,I WILL BE WAITING FOR THE SENDER'S FULL NAMES AND MONEY TRANSFER CONTROL NUMBERS OR A SCAN COPY OF THE WESTERN UNION PAID RECEIPT
PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU WILL BE BY YOUR PHONE FOR I WILL CALL YOU RIGHT AWAY

Dear Kelly;
I am once again, very excited about receiving the New Guniea Pigs.

However, I have never used Western Union. Can you please explain the process to me? I have never used a train before to send money to anyone. Do I need to stand at the platform and hand it to the conductor? Sometimes the train doesn't stop all the way either. I can't run very fast due to my prolapse (sometimes I trip on it).

Also you have not verified if the New Guniea Pigs have been vaccinated against tricynoses. Like I said before, if they are infected they will die. This could be very detrimental to my daughter while riding on them during races.

Also, is Mike NKwenti a business associate?

I sure don't want to wait for that train for long..... Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 11:46 pm

Kelly almost rebaits herself!Twice now I've been told to never mail her again.Wait a week,send a new mail asking where the animals are,start all over.Got this today

Quote:

WE ARE STILL WAITING FOR THE PAYMENT SO THAT WE PROCEED AND GIVE YOU
> THE DETAILS OF THE FLIGHT AT ONCE.
> THANKS AND WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

My reply

Quote:

I am confused here.I have sent payment several times.Always there is a
> problem.Are you doing this yourself,or is this Mike Nkwenti doing it for
> you?If so,maybe you need to hire better help,because he is fouling
> everything up.Please give me one total for everything-not so much
> here,so much there.Then give me payment instructions,but not to Mike
> Nkwenti,as he obviously is too stupid to do much of anything.Best
> regards,John

This is after 4 totally bogus moneygrams,plus several that the details were so fouled up they likely were never used.Anyone want to bet on the odds of Mike being Kelly?

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