Music 2 My Ears - Wickedest Evil Safari

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 4:25 pm

Quote:

Prof also had a hilarious forgiveness ceremony as well. We are still up in the air about what to do.

Perhaps you should stroke your TWATs and slap them at the same time. For example, I see your newest ordained members have not yet been honored on the front page of the TWAT website. I think they'd love to see their names & pictures up on a Real Website for TWATs the world over to see and celebrate.

As for the gentle slap, don't they need reminded that they are perilously close to failure with their first convert? They really need to try harder to keep Godspower in the missionary position, or their grant / ordinations will be reconsidered by the board. We all know there is no more powerful redemption than what comes from the lips of a real TWAT.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 4:28 pm

Quote:

Perhaps you should stroke your TWATs and slap them at the same time

Ha Ha!

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 4:49 pm

Wouldn't it be a good idea for Miracle and Andrew to be tasked with delivering the news to Godspower that because of his behaviour towards the elder TWATS, he will not be reciveing any assistance from the church, and banished from the fold

Can you imagine the fight breaking out between 3 smelling TWATs and the attention that could bring on them Laughing

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 4:51 pm

arabella.butafogo wrote:

Besides G. can practice handling real huge amounts of money. Just today they introduced the new 100 BILLION Z$ banknotes. What are those lousy 200,000$ from TWAT compared to this?

It's not necessary to meet Mr. President himself. Even small bois can teach him to handle huge amounts of money.

Shocked

As for the poll, I'm still pondering...

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 5:53 pm

I'd keep him in TWAT, but try to separate him from the other TWATs ny sending him on to Sudan. Let the other TWATS know that he has to receve specil training in Sudan and that they need to shun him until he comes back properly repentant. With any luck he will disappear into Sudan.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 5:56 pm

For the time being, getting these lads to move is probably impossible. I'm not saying that we are not going to try, but these lads are not the moving type. They are broke and I believe they may have a little bit of doubt here and there, which will probably not make for a traveling lad.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 6:49 pm

arabella.butafogo wrote:

Just today they introduced the new 100 BILLION Z$ banknotes.

C4 news put that into context - a beer now costs HALF A TRILLION Z$ (Z$ 500,000,000,000.00, not that you'd be too worried about the cents)

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 6:55 pm

Some form of public humiliation is in order here after such rudeness on that call Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 6:57 pm

Most religions have a way to disfellowship members who get out of line. I think that TWAT should have a form of "fellowshipis interuptus" for members.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:08 pm

Just as Moses was once banished to the desert for 40 years, so should Godspower.
How about a token 40 days - should be enough for the walk to Abéché. beating

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:20 pm

This just came in to Phystme a few minutes ago in response to his questions about what right Godspower has to be so angry. I love this e-mail:

Quote:

Your Lordship Reverend Williams,

Regards to Mr.Godspower Jessa, In the first place, We shall advise the TWAT not to use this system to try new TWAT members from Africa else, we might face a very strong opposition in the time to come when TWAT must have been established in this zone.

Reason; No African man will be happy when you caused him an extra expenses and leave him stranded without hope of settling the debts incured in the process. If you tell some one before hand that he would embark on such straineous journey, then he would prepare himself before hand so that he would bear whatever consequences that might comes out of it without grudge of the pains, rather than encuring debts that must be paid instantly.

Bearing in mind the kind of tribe here, such incident could easily lead to trouble or problems that might even take the life of the person. This country is a terrorist country where every dick and harry has KNIFE on his waist for any eventuality and he would stab the opponet without saying much words or aguement.

You better ask very well about this country Chad. It take one the strenght of diplomacy to withstand such situation as we find ourselves when we first arrived N'Djamena without seeing Mr Hamdan nor Mr Eric. Maybe, Mr.Godspower Jessa's reaction would have been worst if he had not met with us here to run arround to borrow money to settle the driver he charttered right from Maidugury Nigeria to ensured that he arrived N'Djamena Chad beleiving that everything will be as he was told by Rev. Benjamin Dover.

With due respect, you will understand the kind of situation we faced and still on it till this moment because we already have conviction to work for the TWAT before we left our base. So, even if you like, you can send us to Congo and we shall gladly obey and we shall go to Congo to fufill your mission before you could say it the second time. However, do not compare our faith with another one, else you might encounter problem with people.

Now, we are waiting to receiving our golden crosses as the emblem of TWAT.

Sincerely yours,

I love how they sign off as well. They really believe they are Reverends now. Classic.

While they were writing that, I was checking mail in the Dover account. They managed to get me on chat, but not as Dover. It ended up being Anita, the 15 year old intern, who was checking e-mail for the church. She was not really much of a help. Here is that chat:

Quote:

TWAT: Our dear Rev.Benjamin
How is it today?

me: Hi!! This is Anita. I'm a 15 year old intern here at the church. It's so cool!!!
How R U?
I'm checking mail 4 the church.
R U reealy in Nigeria?
Hello?
8 minutes

TWAT: Hi Anita we are here in Chad
were are u now

me: Wow! I thought you disappeared or sumthin. Smile

Chad? That's SOOOO AWESOME!!
I have heard it's really cool there

TWAT: we were typing then

me: What's ur name?

TWAT: without food and cash?

me: Without food and cash?
I don't get it

TWAT: Rev Miracle

me: I only know about Chad from talking with Eric

TWAT: And Rev Andrew
really

me: That SUX!! Sad

Can't you meet Eric at the headquarters in Abeche?
That place supposedly rules

TWAT: You know Abeche?

me: I only know a little bit about it
Stuff Eric has told me
Like how many internet cafes there are and stuff

TWAT: Ok we don't have camels to ride on to Abeche

me: Aren't there just camels everywhere?
Maybe you can just grab one

TWAT: There maybe lot of cafes but we only knew one

TWAT: can we steal camels that are not ours?
In order for us to ride to Abeche?
Ok Anita is nice chatting with u
we shall be leaving the cafe any moment from now

When I said "brb" I went downstairs to make coffee. It only took like ten minutes. I figured he would wait, but apparently not. We need to let him know he is definitely allowed to secure a camel to ride to Abeche.

Adamu's soulmate Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 337

re the chat to Anita posted above....how did riding camels come into it????

Have they been told that Dover will be riding a camel???

Also re internet cafes in Abeche - " we know only one" - how would they know that?

I cant recall that - only in the stinky episode was he on a camel..but maybe I am missing something Confused

Elite Baiter Joined: 28 Feb 2007 Posts: 1731

Quote:

TWAT: Ok we don't have camels to ride on to Abeche

Love it.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:41 pm

Quote:

TWAT: Ok we don't have camels to ride on to Abeche

Awesome, especially since it came unprovoked.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:48 pm

Quote:

Hi!! This is Anita. I'm a 15 year old intern here at the church. It's so cool!!!

So was Anita the one painting the office? Wink

Quote:

TWAT: can we steal camels that are not ours?
In order for us to ride to Abeche?

Oh I hope they do! I wonder what the penalty for "camel rustling" is in Chad these days.

Besides, Camels = Comedy Gold!

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:55 pm

Tina was painting the office.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:58 pm

Yeah, Anita doesn't paint. Phystme usually has her doing other things. Like cleaning under his desk.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:59 pm

Quote:

This country is a terrorist country where every dick and harry has KNIFE on his waist for any eventuality and he would stab the opponet without saying much words or aguement.

For God's sake, do something. We can't have harry dicks stabbing TWATS!

Feh, couldn't help myself.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 8:05 pm

Bohigal, you made me spew coffee! Laughing

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 8:06 pm

Quote:

Yeah, Anita doesn't paint. Phystme usually has her doing other things. Like cleaning under his desk.

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 8:25 pm

From William to Miracle and Andrew:

Quote:

I appreciate your response. I understand that you have probably grown fond of Mr. Dogspower Jessa. You have probably been spending a lot of time with him. However, it was very rude the way that we were spoken to. I hope you understand that. Our distaste for this TWAT is serious. If it was not for Dover's intervention, then he would be expelled from the church. Dover believes in second chances.

I think that maybe Dogspower needs to undergo a cleansing ceremony. Do you think, that as a Rev, you could perform this? I don't want any impurities in the camp. I am sure you understand.

I need you to tell me your opinion, as a Reverend, on what we should do with Jessa (remember, Jessa is not the same level as your ranking- he is MUCH lower). What does your brother thing? I would like to hear from him on this as well.

Thank you.

Notice I have given Godspower a new name. Laughing

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 11:13 pm

Anyone that sent me a PM wanting to join the TWAT clergy e-mail forward/nonsense program that didn't receive an e-mail with directions on what to do, please PM me.

I just realized I forgot to include the lad's e-mail addy in the damn thing, so I'll follow with another message to you all with it.

For people watching, this is what we decided to do (dates/group numbers changed for different groups, but this is the idea):

Quote:

Hey everyone,

So, what we decided to do (since we had over 15 baiters interested in helping) is split you all into three groups. This will be group number TWO, and you are to begin sending your e-mails in two days (07/23), and send them every three days from there on out. The other groups will be sending mails every two and four days, respectively. That way on days 6, 8, and 12 they will be getting a bunch (17 on day 12, plus whatever we send them mixed in there) of crap to sift through. Please only send one per day on the day you are assigned. If you miss that day due to being away from the computer or something, please don't send anything until the next cycle for your group. DO NOT send anything on days your group is not scheduled to in order to account for missed days.

As far as content goes, let's keep it to stupid office FWD formats and stupid little cutesy things. There can also be inter-office ramblings that are really not pertinent to anything, but don't try to be too funny. We want this to look pretty official, and more or less stuff up their accounts with nonsense now that they're officially reverends. We have reason to believe that Godspower will be looking for any sort of stuff that he can use to prove we're full of shit to the other TWATs, so DON'T give it to him.

They have been told they are being added to the church e-mail list, and that they are to read everything that comes in just in case there is something important in there.

Also, use some nice subject lines here and there, like "Urgent: Please read!", or "Do not Delete", "Please Forward this!" and shit like that. Please also BCC [email protected] on the e-mails you send so we can see what is happening.

Thanks!!

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 11:32 pm

Tell Godspower he is such a bad TWAT that Adam is coming out as his replacement, and as soon as Adam arrives, Godspower should haul his own sorry ass back to wherever he came from. Chance of a punch-up, maybe? Razz

Not quite a Newb Joined: 05 Jul 2008 Posts: 64

^^^^ Is everyone sending mails to everyone, including the TWATs, or just to the TWATs?

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 11:35 pm

^^ Good question. What do you all think would be best? Open CC lists?

Music 2 My Ears - Wickedest Evil Safari	View next topic View previous topic