Music 2 My Ears - Wickedest Evil Safari

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Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 12:08 am

Perhaps promoting him to reverend may have been too fast. Let there be multiple promotions, like acolyte, reader, deacon, assistant reverend, etc. Smile

This would also be a good way to encourage him to move forward to the next destination.

"Aww, too bad you couldn't make it to (insert next city) - we were going to promote you to (insert next level)"

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 12:43 am

Quote:

TWAT: Just go to any Hotel Close by and lodge
Novotel Hotel is good

Hey Rev. , I just looked up the hotel he suggested. The single night rate is USD279 but if you can stay for 4D/3N the rate is only USD154...you gotta have respect for the church budget, ehhh? And the rooms are fabulous: Air conditioning - Mini bar - Satellite / Cable colour TV. Bathroom fittings : Bath tub. Room service : Hot dishes - Cold snacks. I'd stay just to recoop from the jet lag...

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 1:06 am

Godspower does have a very poor attitude. I'm glad he is on a short lease Laughing

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 1:39 am

If it were up to me, Godspower would have been sent packing. I have no clue why Dover wanted to give the guy a second chance. All of that whining and complaining?? He's not even a reverend yet. What a joke.

The thing I really don't get about someone like Godspower who claims to be a bishop is all of this doubt about God's plan. I mean, Dover constantly complains after the first week the lads are out and streded, but Dover has accepted the lord's will, and the lord's will is that he is a whiny little complaining bitch-ass that never gets what he wants. At least he accepts himself for what he is. Smile

These TWATs are screwed to hell. We were talking earlier about this "Nigerian Community Leader" that Godspower owes money to. Do you all know what a hard-ass that guy must be to hold down a leadership position in one of the roughest areas in the world? That's one of the last people I would want to owe money to, that's for sure.

Phystme is such a weirdo perv. Disgusting. Laughing

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 2:01 am

rev. jo grubb would like to pass on her forwarded email! shes got plenty of cool free offers.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 7:50 am

Think that the best reason for keeping Christ on board is that their debts with the community leader are increasing faster... It would be really nice if they could send their current balance... Smile

Did they ever say what they 'pay' per day for bed and lodging? (ridiculous twats, spending church-money on such luxury, only now I realise how great Adamu was in conserving church-funds... Twisted Evil

)

Shouldn't you tell them that in the worst case they should run away from the community leader (preferably Left) if Dover gets delayed to long... Or maybe that you found out of the community leader to be a criminal (wanted for blackmail, murder, rape, you name it...) and that the church-policy strictly forbid any contact between TWAT-members and known criminals (let alone payments to these criminals...)

Interesting thing is that they say there's nobody in their house in Benin and only they have the keys, so there's also nobody there to check if Dover really did show up? (and broke the biggest window to get in...)
there should be way to use that to add to their misery, right?

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 24 Jun 2006 Posts: 7

"That wine is sanctified - you can drink it even if you're underage....."

LMAO!

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 11:30 am

Professor So And So wrote:

TWAT: Nigeria is the Bigest country in Africa so no country
here can be compared with Nigeria in Africa

The lying TW@T:

Sudan 2,505,813 km² - the largest country in Africa

Nigeria 923,768 km² - 14th largest country in Africa

If its the "bigest" country in Africa that he wants, then maybe a trip to Sudan would more than satisfy him (via Abéché of course). Mr. Green

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 5:14 pm

If you guys are torn on whether to fire the arogant lad, you could do it the 100% democraty free way, by adding a poll to the thread. Could be fun.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 5:16 pm

^^great idea^^

The worlds first fully interactive lad safari Laughing

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 9:58 pm

^^^ They don't know any better. Have you ever seen a map where america is much bigger than the square milage would suggest? They probably have the same effect in Nigeria. Especially since they tend not to have a strong grasp on geography.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 10:13 pm

This came in last night to Dover from Crist's kid that is running his mail while he's on vacation:

Quote:

Subject: HE IS IN CHAD HE CALLED ME THAT HE IS BROKE

PLEASE TRY AND MEET WITH MY DAD HE TOLD ME HE IS STRANDED AND CHAD IS A STRANGE LAND FOR HIM PLEASE TRY.

Your dad is mean, so NO!

In fact, I think the clergy is getting worried about Sending Dover into hash conditions with an unpredictable missionary like this just hanging around. He seemed to just fly off the handle for no real reason at all. He's only been out and about for like 5 days or something.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 10:22 pm

Quote:

Your dad is mean, so NO!

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 11:11 pm

Professor So And So wrote:

He's only been out and about for like 5 days or something.

You'll break his spirit soon enough, TWAT is the rocky coastline against which greedy souls are shattered, the id and ego making way for visions of one world under TWAT. 40 days and nights is traditional, but I'd be inclined to go for the hundred just to be on the safe side Smile

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 11:12 pm

Wow, I thought Miracle was mad at us or something when I checked the Dover acct and there was nothing from him, but here is some stuff he sent to the Phystme acct. This first one was sent before the last call we made, and the rest were sent after:

Quote:

Thanks for the update and confirmation status well received, I appreciate the honour giving to me as the head of TWAT in Africa. I will keep you posted till tomorrow cause I don't have enough credit to handle the printing and scanning to return to you now, as this will be done tomorrow. Meanwhile we have not heard from Reverend Benjamin Dover nor receive your call as promised earlier. We are still waiting.

Quote:

Open this attachment to view my signed and reattached Status. I appreciate this honour and doing my best to put other through.
Meanwhile, I have not received that of . I hope we shall also get his Status Letter in the TWAT folds.

Quote:

We hope to receiving Rev Benjamin tomorrow Sunday as promised. Not only that, waiting for someday we shall all worship together especially, the Goblet experience.

The Goblet experience?? Man, This guy is great! Laughing

@ Freddy - Can you make up another Cert for Andrew? I guess it's time to elevate his status too. Maybe Godspower will feel like the little TWAT that he is after the other lads are officially Reverends.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 11:26 pm

cisismygame wrote:

Edit: and don't forget the Xmas party

The Christmas party where everyone has to bring a plate? You could all start discussing your favourite dishes and/or recipes in loving mouth-watering detail...

Master Baiter Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 108

I'm getting worried...it's like a great novel, I've built up such a realistic mental image of all the characters in T.W.A.T than I could start to believe it's for real.... Shocked

Phystme...the earnest man-of-god, totally unaware that most of what he says has a double meaning.
Dover... well-meaning, but bumbles around the World from one problem to another, destined never to reach his destination, and totally unaware that his whining and lack of tact is driving everyone to screaming point.
And now we have everyone else appearing and emailing....the accounts dept, the not-very-bright intern girl, the other clergy, Sister Bernadette.

Better than any comedy show! It's got to be made into a book or a film some day! Laughing

manbiteslion wrote:

40 days and nights is traditional, but I'd be inclined to go for the hundred just to be on the safe side Smile

I can hardly type for tears running down my face! Laughing

Master Baiter Joined: 25 Jun 2008 Posts: 123

if/ when the TWATS start to get sent random emails, i hope they get emails from the other TWAT missionaries who have done travels similar to miracle et al and are grateful for all the money they have received- i imagine they have had a much better TWAT experience than the lads in Chad. It'd be good for the lads to know that it does sometimes go right (just, unfortunately, not for them)

Not quite a Newb Joined: 01 Jun 2008 Posts: 29

What tickles me is that none of them ever realise what "CDXIX" signifies!

It's there in plain view - clear as day for them to see on every TWAT application form.. and yet.. not one of them has ever got it. Laughing

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 12:12 am

Quote:

The Goblet experience?? Man, This guy is great!

The little known first draft title for the 4th Harry Potter book:

Miracle Charles Ndubuisi and the Goblet of TWAT

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 09 Jul 2008 Posts: 6

Quote:

What tickles me is that none of them ever realise what "CDXIX" signifies!

Ummmm...me neither....

Master Baiter Joined: 25 Jun 2008 Posts: 123

^^^

Its 419 in roman numerals

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 09 Jul 2008 Posts: 6

Oh, der. Thank you. Laughing

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 2:22 am

GEEZOW! had some photobucket problems, Proffessa, the last pm i sent is the right one.

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 4:19 am

^^ Thanks.

@ everyone - Anyone that wants to be a part of the TWAT clergy e-mail FWD (or similar worthless info), please set up an e-mail acct that appears as [email protected], and PM me your baiter name and addy.

@ chugger - I like the idea of there being a couple of successful reverends sending in occasional commentary about their respective churches and how well it's all going/thanks yous and such. If anyone wants to be one of those lads, also let me know.

I bet he gets annoyed after a very short time, but he'll be too afraid to miss something important from the church that I bet he at least opens every mail. Laughing

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